


Lilo & Stitch's Ohana

by Bennie_Stardust



Category: Lilo & Stitch (2002)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Inspired by Music, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-01-04 09:50:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 117,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21195701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bennie_Stardust/pseuds/Bennie_Stardust
Summary: A series of short stories exploring the lives of Lilo and Stitch's cousins several months after the ending of "Snafu", but ignoring the events of "Leroy & Stitch" and all other spin-offs.In each episode, a different cousin will be the hero of their own story, interacting with other Experiments, and facing conflicts unique to their personalities and powers. You'll see many Experiments as you've never seen them before. Lilo and Stitch appear in each episode, helping out their ohana whenever they can.





	1. Episode Guide

**EPISODE GUIDE:**

**SEASON 1 (COMPLETE!)**

_**1.**** Your Song **_**\- **627 returns with two evil Experiments by his side. It's up to Stitch and Angel to stop them when they use a recording of Angel's siren song to control their cousins.

_**2\. Smooth Criminal - **_Finder is on the case when Bonnie & Clyde start a new string of robberies.

_**3\. Purple Rain - **_When a power outage plunges the whole island into darkness, Sparky rises to the challenge. However, things get harder for him once it starts raining.

_**4\. Somebody to Love - **_Lilo, Stitch, and Angel invite Felix to Elastico's circus, where the timid cleaner becomes smitten by the show's star performer. Can someone as shy and quiet as Felix earn the attention of the energetic, extroverted Elastico?

_**5\. Imagine - **_When Space Captain Lilo and her crew are captured by their rival, Captain Gantu, it's up to Lieutenant Victoria to save the day.

_**6\. Rock and Roll Dreams Come Through - **_The always-silent Belle and Sample are given a unique chance to express their voice.

_**7\. We Didn't Start the Fire - **_Cobra Bubbles and Doctor Jumba both compile their profiles on the Experiments.

_**8\. Life on Mars - **_627 has a few questions.

_**9\. Stairway to Heaven - **_Stitch's cousins have to work together to save a life.

_**10\. The Times They Are A-Changin' - **_Two Experiments adjust to their new life.

**SEASON 2 (COMPLETE!)**

**_11\. Landslide - _**While adjusting to life on Earth with support from her cousins, Flute discovers a new threat against her ohana.

**_12\. Just the Way You Are - _**Chopsuey and Daniel embark on a fantastic voyage at Poxy's request, hoping to alter the living virus into something less infectious.

**_13\. Heroes - _**In this exciting ish of _The Daring Adventures of Ace, _the Crimson Crusader must team-up with the dastardly duo of Bonnie and Clyde! Thrills! Chills! Action! Suspense! Don't miss out on this one!

**_14\. Dream On - _**Remmy enlists Drowsy's help to discover the source of David's recurring nightmare.

**_15\. Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters - _**Hammerface, Heat, Plasmoid, and Thresher's trip takes them to New York City. Will the City That Never Sleeps have what they're looking for?

**_16\. Born to Run - _**Yin and Yang embark on a seafaring adventure, but are threatened by a mysterious stowaway.

**_17\. The Long and Winding Road - _**Jumba and Pleakley close in on Hamsterviel's lab.

**_18\. Hotel California - _**who

**_19\. I Want to Break Free - _**The Experiments head into space to rescue their cousins with the help of a new ally.

**_20._ ****_Man in the Mirror - _**Lilo helps a new cousin choose a name.

**SEASON 3 (BEGINNING NO LATER THAN MARCH 2021!)**

**_21._ _If I Can Dream _**\- While catching up with all her cousins and preparing for a new adventure, Lilo receives an exciting offer from the Grand Councilwoman.

**_22._ ****_Rhiannon _**\- Houdini enlists Finder's help when the circus is troubled by a new Experiment with a knack for mischief and illusions.

**_23._ ****_Kurenai _**\- On Okinawa Island, as Yuna Kamihara prepares to face her rival in the upcoming karate tournament, she is tested by a mysterious warrior in the forest.

**_24._ ****_Nothing to My Name _**\- Qifa Zhe Film Camp presents, a student film directed by Wang Ai Ling: _My Day With Carmen._

**_25._ _American Pie_**\- Jason and Slick call upon every fiber of their salesman charisma when they realize they forgot to book their band's next venue.

**_26._ ****_Read 'Em and Weep _**\- Hamsterviel goes to trial. Meanwhile, back on Earth, Mertle faces some troubling realizations when her father returns home.

**_27._ ****_El Condor Pasa _**\- "I'd rather be a hammer than a nail..."

**_28._ ****_Jungleland _**\- When his cousins are in trouble, and nobody else can help, Snooty must save them on his own.

**_29._ ****_The Man Who Sold the World _**\- Stitch and his cousins face their greatest challenge yet. Can they help an Experiment who believes he will never be able to change?

**_30._ ****_November Rain _**\- The band's tour comes to an end.


	2. Episode 1: Your Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 627 returns with two evil Experiments by his side. It's up to Stitch and Angel to stop them when they use a recording of Angel's siren song to control their cousins.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Burnin' Love" - Elvis Presley  
*"I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That)" - Meat Loaf  
*"Your Song" - Elton John

**Episode 1: ** _ **Your Song** _

**I**

It was perfectly warm. After a whole day in the water, Angel's fur was already completely dry by the time she was on the hammock behind her new home. In fact, she felt even fluffier. So did Stitch. As they curled up in a yin-yang shape, they purred as they rubbed their cheeks together and stroked each other's ears. They felt like a cloud that had run out of rain.

She couldn't believe it, but it all felt even better than she'd ever imagined. The water, the sun, Stitch, and her new home. It was so much more than just a new house; it was a new world. It was streets and beaches instead of a cell, people she could hug and lick the cheeks of instead of only seeing through glass. And, most of all, it was music. She already loved music, but to be able to listen to it at high volumes, with others who loved it, free of the fear that Gantu would shake the walls and demand silence...

Angel kept reminding herself that she wasn't dreaming. It made it even sweeter.

"Angie?" Stitch said.

"Ih, boojiboo?"

"Song, please?"

The request siphoned Angel's joy. Even the thought of her siren song felt out-of-place in her new world. It was the only thing she still had that Jumba had chosen for her, that Gantu had made her use. Given the choice, she'd have nothing to do with it.

But it made Stitch smile. Perhaps that would be enough.

_"Acoota chi-meeto,_

_"Igatta no mootah,_

_"Nagga to..."_

She tried to get through it, but she simply couldn't. The lyrics tasted stale.

"Okitaka, booj?" Stitch asked. His smile was gone.

"Ih..." Angel sighed. She hoped he wouldn't be too disappointed, but she couldn't keep it bottled up. Not anymore.

"Naga like song anymore. Make meega remember old days..."

Stitch's face drooped even further.

"Soka."

"Naga, naga," Stitch said. "Meega soka. Like happy Angel more than song. If youga naga like song, then meega neither."

Angel felt her dreamy elation flooding back to her. Some invisible force brought their noses together.

"Sing something else?" Stitch asked.

Angel thought for a moment, browsing her mental song collection. Another reason she'd grown tired of her siren song was that there were just so many better things to sing.

_"Stuck on you,_

_"I've got this feeling down deep in my soul that I just can't lose,_

_"Guess I'm on my way,_

_"Needed a friend,_

_"And the way I feel now I guess I'll be with you 'til the end,_

_"Guess I'm on my way,_

_"Mighty glad you stayed."_

Stitch's smile was back. She knew the King was just the thing to lift both their spirits.

"Hey," Stitch said, "can meega sing for youga?"

"Ih, please."

"Okitaka...Uh...Be right back." Stitch said as he hopped out of the hammock.

Angel sat up as she watched him dart into the house. He returned seconds later with Lilo's record player. He handed Angel the player before climbing back in, then took it back once he was settled. They both handled the machine as though it were made of glass.

Stitch placed the tip of his claw gingerly on the spinning vinyl disc, then opened his mouth to release a soothing series of piano notes.

Angel curled back up beside him as he 'sang.'

_"It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside,_

_"I'm not one of those who can easily hide,_

_"I don't have much money, but boy if I did,_

_"I'd buy a big house where we both could live,_

_"If I were a sculptor, but then again, no,_

_"Or a man who makes potions in a traveling show,_

_"I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do..."_

Stitch shrugged with that line, nodding to the record player.

_"My gift is my song, and this one's for you."_

Angel hadn't heard this song before. She knew Stitch couldn't have written it, and yet the voice coming from his mouth may as well have been his.

_"And you can tell everybody that this is your song,_

_"It may be quite simple, but now that it's done,_

_"I hope you don't mind,_

_"I hope you don't mind,_

_"That I've put down in words,_

_"How wonderful life is while you're in the world."_

Angel had to keep blinking to keep herself from crying. She wondered how Stitch could ever have liked her siren song when those words were out there.

"What youga think?" Stitch asked, his blue cheeks flushing with red.

Angel sat up and placed the biggest, wettest, longest kiss she could muster on Stitch's cheek.

She reminded herself again that she wasn't dreaming.

**I** **I**

Its purple sheen glimmered through the window. Its amplifier stood tall and proud at its side. Its strings seemed to be reaching out to touch its visitors' claws. All that stood between them was a glass window and a paper sign reading, _$599.99._

The glass window wasn't a problem; Stitch and Angel both knew that they could shatter it with a good, firm headbutt. Or, better yet, they could simply walk into the shop and take what they wanted. Two years ago, they would've done.

But things were different now.

"Almost there, Angie," Stitch said. He stepped away from the window and finished tuning his ukulele.

"Ih." Angel remained pressed against the window. She raised her hands in such a way that her reflection appeared to be holding the electric guitar.  
"Hope sound is good like look."

"Gonna be bootifa." Stitch leaned his chin on Angel's shoulder.  
He waited a whole two seconds for her to turn her head. When she didn't, he opened his mouth wide and closed it around her antennae. He didn't bite, but he kept it snug in his lips.

Angel looked at him. He made his black eyes as big as he could. She smiled before kneeling down to curl an arm around his legs. She hoisted Stitch up onto her shoulder and spun him around. They both laughed. Stitch teetered, but he never felt safer than he did when Angel held him, whether it be in her arms, or her shoulders, or doing a handstand on the tips of her toes.

"Showtime?" She asked.

"Showtime!"

She put Stitch down. In front of them were an empty guitar case, a quiet street, and a few passers-by who completely overlooked the two aliens and their ukulele.

Stitch and Angel rubbed their noses together for good luck and then counted on their fingers.

_1\. 2. 3. 4._

"_Lord Almighty,  
_"_I feel my temperature rising!  
_"_Higher, higher!  
_"_It's burning through to my soul!  
_"_Burnin'! Burnin'! Burnin',  
_"_And nothing can cool me!  
_"_I just might turn into smoke,  
_"_But I feel fine!"_

Stitch was always astonished at how Angel's voice changed when she sang. It was still her voice, of course, but it kicked into a whole different gear when she performed. Stitch thought about how he and Angel and their other cousins kept some things hidden; antennae, back spikes, extra arms. Things which they kept hidden until it was time to use them, but when they did, they could do things which still surprised even Stitch. Angel's singing was like one of those things. It also happened to be Stitch's favorite.

"'_Cause your kisses lift me higher,  
_"_Like the sweet song of a choir!  
_"_You light my morning sky,  
_"_With burnin' love!"_

Stitch supported Angel's vigorous voice with his ukulele and a few _ahhhhs _and _ohhhhs. _His claws danced with the ukulele chords as the rest of him danced with Angel.

"'_Cause your kisses lift me higher,  
_"_Like the sweet song of a choir!  
_"_You light my morning sky,  
_"_With burnin' love!"_

The chorus went by one more time. Stitch reached for Angel's hand once the last note had passed. She took his and pulled him in, dipping him and bumping their noses together. That earned them a whistle from the crowd which Stitch had only just now noticed had gathered around. Angel's singing was replaced by their cheers and by the clinking of coins landing in Stitch's guitar case.

The two Experiments bowed.

"Time for one more?" Angel asked.

She looked elated. Seeing her smile like that made Stitch smile just as wide. He knew it wasn't the money. She just loved the performance.

"Sure."

So did he.

**III**

"_He Inoa No Kalani Kalākaua Kulele."_

The drummers finished off with two more beats. Then Mr. Puloki piped up.

"Okay, that was good. Mertle, you're going a little too quickly, watch out for that, but enthusiasm is great. Victoria, try not to point your feet too far out…"

Lilo stopped listening and looked behind Moses and the drummers. Felix stood at the very back of the room, his broom tucked under his arm so he could give Lilo a silent applause. His scarlet smile burned on his face; Lilo could tell that he was scared of being noticed.  
Snooty was perched on Felix's finned head, offering a somewhat audible applause with his wings.  
Lilo smiled and waved at them.

"Lilo?"

"Yeah, Kumu?"

"Did you hear what I told you?"

"Yeah."

"Did you?" Mr. Puloki took the sternest tone he could, which wasn't very stern at all. Lilo had heard sterner from Nani, Stitch, even Pleakley while he still lived on Earth.

"Yeah…" Lilo quickly replayed her hula performance in her mind. "Get the arms higher."

Mr. Puloki raised an eyebrow at her. "...Very good. Okay. Good job today, everyone."

The moment they were dismissed, Lilo and Victoria darted over to Felix and Snooty.

"You liked the dance, Felix?" Lilo asked, giving him a surprise hug.

"Ih," he stammered. "Like watching hula...Wish meega could do too."

"I think you'd be a great hula dancer."

Felix looked down at his clawed feet. He was very red in the face for a green-furred Experiment.

"See you Saturday, Lilo?" Victoria asked, throwing her bag over one shoulder while Snooty perched on the other.

"You bet."

Snooty flew over to Lilo to take a goodbye slurp from her nostrils. He then fluttered to Felix, taking an especially long drink from his trunk.  
Lilo laughed. Felix sneezed.

Once the other students had left, Lilo turned back to Felix.

"How've you been, Felix?" She asked.

"Good," he smiled. "Youga good, Lilo?"

"Always...Haven't heard anymore from Oscar, have you?"

"Naga. Jumba fix. Oscar gone."

"Awesome...Did Jumba say if he knows when he'll be back?"

Felix shook his head. "_Wants _to come back, but...Say Federation need him. Need to find Hamsterviel hiding place."

"Hm…"

At that moment, Lilo heard something tapping on the door behind her. She turned and found Stitch pressed against the window, clawing, screaming, and begging in complete silence to be let in while Angel made several contactless bites around his neck.

"Oh, no," Lilo laughed. "It's the attack of the furry pink zombies!" She hopped over to the door and pulled it open.

"_Urrrrr..._Too late, Lilo…" Stitch groaned as he lumbered in, claws outstretched in crooked shapes.  
"Meega zombie now..._Urrrrr…"_

"_Brainnnnnnnns…" _Angel added, lumbering beside Stitch.

Lilo pointed at the zombified Experiments, aiming for the center of Stitch's forehead.

"Click," she said. "Oh, no! I'm outta ammo! _Noooooooo-" _Her faux screams evolved into laughter as the zombies drowned her in a flurry of licks. Once she was converted, she and her undead companions turned to Felix, who gripped his broom like a sword in a vain final effort to save himself.  
"_Feeeeeeeeelix…"_

"W-W-W-What kind of zombies youga?" Felix asked.

Lilo, Stitch, and Angel wiggled their fingers and claws at him. "_Tickle zombies!"_

Felix's face was one of the most mind-shattering terror imaginable.

After running round and round the hula school after Felix, who was much faster than Lilo or even Stitch and Angel had expected, the trio of zombies got tired and bid their goodbyes to their elusive prey. Felix gave them a relieved wave from the roof of the school as they began their walk home.

"Fun at hula?" Angel asked.

"Uh-huh," Lilo replied. "You guys nearly got enough for that cool guitar?"

"Almost," Stitch said.

"Neat…"

An awkward silence followed. Lilo didn't realize it until it was already midway through. She normally wasn't one for awkward silences, but lately, she hadn't been able to help it. No matter what fun distractions her ohana could offer her, not even Stitch and Angel hoisting her up to sit between their shoulders, Lilo could not keep her mind completely off it.

"Okay, Lilo?" Stitch asked, rubbing his cheek affectionately against her knee.

"Mertle being stinkyhead still?" Angel added.

"No."

"Nani yell at youga?"

"No. Those things don't bug me anymore." Lilo scratched behind their ears. She liked to listen to them purr.  
"...I just can't stop thinking about Jumba."

"Ih," Angel nodded.

"We miss him, too," Stitch said.

"It's not just that," Lilo continued. "I know the Federation needs his help to find Hamsterviel, and I know that means that Gantu will finally stop bugging us, but...I'm just scared that a cousin will come along who's too tough for us; who we need Jumba's help to beat."

"Maybe," Stitch replied. "But we can do it. Might be hard, but we have ohana."

As they walked, they passed by a few of their cousins.

Sample and Belle strutted down the street, each wearing a pair of headphones connected to a single cassette player. They spotted Lilo and signed to her, "Hey guys. What's up?"

Lilo signed back, "Just chillin' like you guys."

"Groovy."

They saw Sparky leaving an electronics shop, carrying a bag full of D batteries and licking his lips at its content.  
A hand made of water slithered out of a storm drain, hovering over Sparky's ankle as hungrily as Sparky hovered over his batteries.  
The electric Experiment rocketed into the distance towards his lighthouse just as the hand pounced. The hand made a frustrated snap before assuming its true snail-like, yellow-eyed form.

"Aloha, Spooky," Lilo waved.

Spooky waved back, looked left, looked right, looked back, then slithered up the wall of the shop and out of sight.

Lilo's ohana had only gotten bigger and bigger in the past year. She knew that together, they could overcome more than even Lilo could imagine. But Jumba had made 627 Experiments. Even with all the ones reformed by Lilo and Stitch, there were still a lot left unaccounted for, and as Lilo had learned the hard way, they could be just about anything. That meant that maybe, just maybe, there was at least one who was out of their league.

**IV**

_Evil...Evil...Evil...Evil...Evil...Evil...Good...Evil...Good...Wrong...Right...Left...Up. Down. Diagonal...Justice. Injustice. Science. Logic. Morality...Brain. Heart. Lungs. Fingers. Hands. Arms. Legs. Feet. Toes...Irony. Sarcasm. Annoyance. Laughter. Hunger. Strong. Weak. Metal. Stone. Glass. Plastic. Paper...Jumba...Experiment...Human...Earth...626...627-_

He opened his eyes. It was strange because he remembered opening his eyes in the past, but he didn't remember ever _thinking _about opening his eyes. Come to think of it, he didn't remember ever doing much thinking at all.

"Did it work?"

"Of course it worked."

"You sure? He's lookin' pretty blank."

"Be patient."

"Don't tell me to be patient!"

"This is how the procedure goes. Take it up with the science, not with me."

There were two voices; one gruff and one deep. It took him a moment to notice their owners.  
The first was yellow-furred, purple-eyed, and big. Not just tall but also muscular. He had a feeling that she could snap him in half with one hand.  
The other was her opposite; skinny, black-eyed, and green save for the silver mohawk sprouting from his head. He probably couldn't crush anyone or anything with his bare hands, but he might shoot them dead with one of the many blasters strapped to his torso.

"Hello," the gunslinger said. "I am number 621. This is number 021. You are number 627."

He looked down at his own red-furred body. He wiggled his clawed fingers and toes, just in case they weren't really his.

"What do you remember?" 621 asked.

"...I-" He hadn't expected his voice to sound like that. He thought it would've been more raspy and less mellow. He wasn't disappointed; just surprised.  
"...I remember laughing...At...626, I think it was...He was falling down a lot...Doesn't seem so funny anymore...It's weird. Everything I can remember feels like...Well, like it happened to somebody else."

"I thought as much," 621 replied.  
He held out his hand. 627 took it and stood up. It took some effort; his legs felt like jelly. He glanced backward; he had been sitting in some kind of metallic, egg-shaped chair with sides adorned with chittering buttons and blinking screens.  
"Careful," 621 assured him. "You haven't used those legs in a while...After your laughing fit, 626 and his human friend dehydrated you into pod form. Took me and 021 a while, but we got a hold of your pod and this programming chamber from Jumba's old lab here on Earth. When Jumba made you, he gave you some kind of mental block; something which kept you from thinking of anything besides 'evil.' I've just removed the block; upgraded you from a slobbering beast to...Something much more."

627 thought for a while, replaying 621's words in his head. Finally, he spoke.

"Why?"

621 opened his mouth to answer, but 021 butted in and answered for him.

"We're supposed to be out there causing destruction, making demands, conquering plants, all that good stuff, ya know. But 626 is screwing it all up for all of us! He's makin' 'em think they should just lie around on this planet instead! We have to change their minds back!"

"They chose to throw you out of their life," 621 added. "But to show them how serious we are, we're going to let you into ours."

627 thought some more. It was a strange new feeling. He wasn't sure how to feel about it.

"Okay," he said. "So...How are we going to do it?"

"With this." From his gun belt, 621 produced a tape recorder.

**V**

Angel didn't know how it happened. Maybe someone had been feeling generous. Maybe someone else tossed in two fivers when they only meant to toss in one. Whatever it was, today's performance had cinched it. Angel and Stitch left the music store, as well as the bulging sack of coins therein, with a sleek new electric guitar and an amplifier.  
She couldn't believe she was holding it. It had been only a fantasy to her for ages. It still felt like one now. Half of her wanted to admire it for hours. The other half wanted to play every song ever written on it.

"Like it, boojiboo?" Stitch asked as they sat on the roof of Lilo's hula school.

"Isa perfect," Angel said. She strummed a few chords. The resounding electric notes sent a delightful tingle through her fingers, winding its way up to the ends of her antennae and down to the tips of her toes.  
Then a thought struck her. It was probably a silly thought, but just to be sure.  
"Booj," she asked. "We still play for people, right?"

"Yeah," Stitch said, leaning in for a four-armed hug. "Meega have so much fun making music with boojiboo. Now music even better with cool guitar for cool singer."

Angel rubbed her cheek against Stitch's. She found that there were few things which couldn't be made better with a hug from Stitch.

She looked at the guitar again. She wasn't sure why, but she began thinking about her old siren song. It had been ages since she had thought about it. For months now, her head had been a studio housing the likes of Elvis, Elton, Freddie, MJ, Zep, John, Paul, George, and Ringo. Now, as that light, dainty cadence wandered into Angel's mental recording session, it simply couldn't stand beside all those others.  
Angel felt glum. It wasn't that she missed the old song; she really didn't at all. It was her disbelief at having ever sung such a thing.  
It didn't help that she also heard the song playing from somewhere nearby.

_Akootah chi meetoh,_

_Igata no mootah._

_Naga to nala,_

_Itume tidooka._

Angel and Stitch looked at each other. "Oh, blitznak."  
Angel put down her guitar before she and Stitch peeked over the side of the roof. They spotted a few of their cousins; Sparky, Sample, Belle, and Spooky, but they all seemed off. Their faces were blank and their head had a haunting pink glow.  
There were others; a yellow one and a green one who Stitch and Angel hadn't seen before. Then there was a red one who Stitch was all too familiar with.

"Uh-oh," Stitch whispered. "627…"

The new green Experiment took a tape recorder off his belt and hit play.

_Akootah chi meetoh,_

_Igata no mootah._

_Naga to nala,_

_Itume tidooka._

The cousins all took a step closer to 627 and his new friends.

"Very good," the green one said with a satisfied smile. He sniffed, then looked up at Stitch and Angel. The cousins did, too.

"Aloha, cousins," Stitch said sheepishly.

It was worth a try.

The green one hit play again.

_Akootah chi meetoh,_

_Igata no mootah._

_Naga to nala,_

_Itume tidooka._

"Get them."

The cousins pounced.

Angel officially decided that she hated that song.

**VI**

"_He Inoa No Kalani Kalākaua Kulele."_

The drums came. Moses' notes came. But Felix and Snooty's quiet applause didn't come.

Lilo found them at the back of the room like always, only with blank expressions staring at nothing in particular. They turned and marched out the door.

Lilo could hear some kind of faint song coming from outside. No. It couldn't be. Angel hadn't sung that song in ages.

"Hey, Snoots," Victoria called out. She was ignored. She tried to entice the batty Experiment with a good, long snort, but to no avail.  
"That's weird. Usually Snoots flaps right over at a good snort like that."

"Victoria?"

"Yeah, Lilo?"

"Remember Angel's song that I told you about?"

"The brain-melting one? Yeah, I remember."

"Listen."

"...Oh..._Oh_...Oh, no."

Both girls rushed out the door, not even bothering to change out of their hula costumes.

It wasn't the worst thing Lilo had expected, which was that Angel had turned evil again and was using her song on her cousins.  
It also wasn't the second worst thing she had expected, which was Angel being mind-controlled to use her song on her cousins.  
It _was _the third worst thing; somebody was using a recording of Angel's song on the cousins.  
That was still quite bad. It also got bonus badness points for throwing in the return of 627.

"Uh...Are those cousins, too?" Victoria pointed a quivering finger at 627 and his two new friends.

"Yeah," Lilo responded, trying to sound at least a little bit braver than she felt.  
"The red one's 627. Never seen spiky-hair or mustard-muscles before."

"Are they friendly?"

"I don't think so. What do you think?"

"Probably not."

"And Nani says I have trouble reading people."

Stitch dueled 627 while Angel dealt with the green one with all the blasters. They each warded off any cousins who attempted to join the fight.

The musclebound one was about to join in when she looked over her shoulder. She grinned.  
Lilo found most of the cousins' grins cute, especially Elastico's, but this one's was anything but cute.

"Hey," the not-very-cute Experiment growled. "You're that Earthling who's been distractin' all the others."  
She took a step towards Lilo and Victoria, who felt the Earth shake under the Experiment's clawed foot.

"I…" Lilo spoke up. She didn't remember it being this hard before. "I'm _not _distracting them! I'm helping them find a place where they belong...And if you'll let me, I can help you, too."

"I'm right smack where I belong already," the yellow Experiment spat, cracking her knuckles. "And in just a moment, so will you."

**VII**

To Angel, the solution seemed simple enough; snatch the recorder from 621 and crush it, stomp on it, spit on it, burn it, then send the ashes to Jupiter. (Maybe not that last bit. Rocket fuel was even more expensive than an electric guitar).  
It sounded simple, but 621 seemed determined to make it much harder than it needed to be. It didn't matter what Angel threw at him; a punch, a kick, an elbow, a knee, a headbutt, Sample, her antennae, 621 ducked and twisted out of the way of anything he couldn't parry with one of his three arms. His fourth he used to hold the recorder as far away from Angel as possible.

Angel's cousins tried to butt in, but Angel blew past them. If she was going to hit anything, it was going to be either 621 or his accursed tape recorder.

At one point, 621 reached out and blocked a punch which had barely even left Angel's chin.

"You're sloppy," he said with a condescending grin which boiled Angel's blood. "This place has dulled your abilities, 624."

"Show _youga _dull!" Angel pushed against 621's grip, forcing him to take a step back. She went for a roundhouse kick to his head.

621's arm shot up, blocking Angel's leg, then twisted around it so his claws could snap around her ankle.  
"Way to show me," he growled.

While hopping on one foot, Angel's glance was thrown over her shoulder, where she found 021 storming towards Lilo and Victoria in the doorway of the school.  
Angel had a moment of panic, but what she found about moments of panic was that they often led to great ideas. In this case, her great idea was to do a backflip, flinging 621 off of her foot and into 021's back.  
To her astonishment, 021 barely budged at the body crashing into her. At the very least, the distraction had been enough for Lilo and Victoria to retreat into the school.

Angel was beginning to think that there might be a better solution than destroying the recorder. There actually was one; a precaution programmed into her by Jumba himself. The old siren song was already annoying enough; the last thing Angel wanted to hear now was the backwards version.  
Well, that wasn't true; the last thing she wanted was all her cousins staying brainwashed. So, given the choice…

On the plus side, she didn't end up having to hear that reversed dribble after all. On the downside, none of the hypnotized cousins could hear it over Belle's supersonic scream.

It sent Angel flying into a nearby tree. 627 sent Stitch to join her.

"Ow," they groaned together before they were each hit in the head by a falling coconut.

"You know this can stop whenever you want," 627 warned, his eyes crimson with the beginning of a laser blast.  
"You might last a while, but even with your strength, there's no way you can outmatch all of us."

"We don't have to be enemies," 621 added. "We're just trying to help you realize your mistake."

Stitch gave them a hoarse laugh. Angel felt his claws dig into the tree behind them.

"Funny," he said. "Was gonna say same to youga."

Angel rolled out of the way as Stitch brought the tree down on the Experiments. They scattered, but 627 stood his ground, blasting the tree to bits with his laser vision.

Angel and Stitch leaped to their feet, determined to use every microsecond they'd bought to hatch a plan. What they needed was something even louder than Belle's scream.  
They glanced up at the roof; their answer's purple sheen gleamed at them in the sunlight.  
Angel looked at Stitch and found her own grin reflected back at her. That was one of the things she loved most about him; that delightful electricity when they got the same idea at the same time.

Angel leaped into the air, folding herself into ball form just like how Stitch taught her. (It was quite cozy once she got over the pickle-like taste of her feet). Stitch caught her and bowled the Angel-ball into their opponents.  
Angel couldn't see, but a sharp thump at her back and an echoing grunt told her that she'd scored a conehead-shot on 627.  
Unfolding, she hopped on Sample's head, "_Sorry, Sample," _swung on a flying Sparky's feet, "_Sorry, Sparks," _and spun in midair to dodge a laser blast from Felix's trunk, "_Sorry, Felix!"  
_  
She landed on the rooftop in a graceful somersault. Her guitar and amplifier were waiting for her just a few steps away. One. Two. Thr-  
Something yanked hard on her antennae.

"_Snooty," _she yelled at the Experiment tugging her away with his tiny talons.

Snooty gave her a nasally snarl.

Swinging her head forward in a move that would've made Angus Young proud, Angel flung Snooty off of her antennae. She reached for her guitar.

"Whaddaya think you're doin'?!"

Something clamped onto Angel's ankle, hurled her through the air, and slammed her on her back.  
As her body pulsated with pain, she looked up into the fuming face of 021. She reached up to try and dislodge the huge Experiment's iron grip, but all she got were three more slams onto the roof.  
She felt numb all over as 021 held her upside-down.

"What's that over there?" 021 snapped, nodding in the guitar's direction. "One 'a Jumba's prototype laser cannons?"

"G...Guitar…" Angel wheezed.

"The heck is a guitar?!"

"Makes...Music…"

021 squinted at Angel as if she were going to say more. Then her eyes widened and she let out a feeble laugh.

"I just can't believe you…" 021 shook her head. "Do you have any idea how great a gift you have? You can make cities, entire _planets _bow to your will. I'd trade all my strength in for that kind of power. But what do you do? Waste it all playing your stupid 'music' for these tiny Earthlings. How, in this or any galaxy, could you possibly think that's better?! Answer me that!"

Her voice was desperate. It was difficult for Angel to tell, battered and upside-down, but she thought, for just a moment, that 021's eyes had flickered with a sickly green.  
Before she could be sure, there was explosion of crackling electric sound. Some people might call it a lot of noise. Angel called it a pretty sick riff.

021 dropped Angel to clutch her ears. Angel landed on her feet and launched an ear-splitting headbutt into 021's nose.

"_Ob! Youb libble-" _021 spat before Angel shoved her off the roof with a two-footed handstand kick.

"Thanks, guys!" Angel turned to Lilo, who held her guitar, and Victoria, who turned the volume on the amplifier ever so slightly down from the maximum setting.

"No problem, Angie," Lilo replied. "Cool guitar, by the way." She returned it to its owner.

"Thanks."

They looked down to the ground. Stitch was twisting and ducking anything his cousins could throw at him. They hadn't touched him yet, but they were right on his heels. One wrong move…

"So," Lilo said. "All you gotta do is sing your song backwards, right?"

Angel's claws hovered above the strings. She _could _do that, but somehow, she thought that there might still be an even better way.

"Loudest volume, please, Victoria," she called back.

She looked down and found 021 getting to her feet. Angel had never seen anyone so furious. She thought she would feel angry, too, but she only felt sorry.

"My gift," she said. "My choice."

She pointed a claw to the sky and brought it down on the chords.

"_I would do anything for love!  
And you know it's true and that's a fact!"_

The cousins' attack on Stitch slowed down. Bolts of lightning and laser blasts became hesitant and few.

621, who had been sniping from a nearby palm tree, hit his tape recorder again.

_Akootah chi-_

"_I would do anything for love!  
And there'll never be no turning back!"_

"248!" 621 ordered, pointing at Angel.

"_But I'll never forget the way you feel right now.  
Oh, no. No way."_

Belle looked up at Angel and let out her shrillest scream.

"_I would do anything for love!"_

Belle may as well have been providing backup vocals.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!"_

The cousins stopped completely.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!"_

And looked at 621, 627, and 021.

"_But I won't do that!"_

"Blitznak," 021 spat.

"_NO, I WON'T DO THAT!"_

621 hit his tape recorder one last time, but found he could only hear its song when he brought it right beside his ear. Even then, it was faint.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!  
ANYTHING YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF!  
BUT I JUST WON'T DO THAT!"_

Stitch and his cousins overwhelmed their assailants. They took a few good licks; Sparky got thrown by 627, Stitch got headbutted by 021, and Sample received a good kick in the gut from 621.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!  
ANYTHING YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF!  
BUT I JUST WON'T DO THAT!"_

But between all the lightning bolts, laser blasts, and claws, the three sinister Experiments found themselves on their back foot.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!  
ANYTHING YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF!  
BUT I JUST WON'T DO THAT!"_

"We should retreat!" 621 shouted.

"What?!" 627 and 021 shouted back.

"_We should retreat!"_

"_I can't hear you!" _627 yelled. "_But I think we should retreat!"_

"_That's what-Yes! Yes! Good idea! Retreat!"_

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!  
ANYTHING YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF!  
BUT I JUST WON'T DO THAT!"_

021 scooped up her two allies and leaped into the air. Stitch and his cousins had to shield their eyes from the sun to follow her. If they hadn't seen her come down somewhere in the distance, they would've thought that she could fly.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!  
ANYTHING YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF!  
BUT I JUST WON'T DO THAT!"_

Angel leaped from the roof and landed with her knees in the sand.

"_I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE!  
ANYTHING YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF!  
BUT I JUST WON'T DO-"_

"Excuse me?"

Angel stopped. She looked behind her and found Lilo's hula teacher peeking out from a window.

"Could you keep it down, please?"

"Oh...Okay. Sorry."

Angel realized that she didn't ache as much as she had a few minutes ago. She also found that her heart was beating incredibly fast. But it was a good kind of fast.

She turned and found her cousins looking at her.

"What?" She asked.

"Gonna finish?" Stitch smiled.

Her heart went faster.

"_...But I'll never stop dreaming of you every night of my life.  
I would do anything for love.  
But I won't do that.  
No, I won't do that."_

**VIII**

It took until that evening just for Angel's pulse to drop even a little bit. It wasn't just the thrill of the performance, although it had been like no other performance she'd ever done before. It was that her idea had worked; she hadn't needed to use her backwards siren song.

She hadn't put the guitar down since.

"Hey, Angel?" Nani said.

Angel darted to attention. She had completely forgotten that she was sitting at the dinner table. Nani, David, Lilo, and Stitch's plates were already half-emptied of David's experimental new pasta dish (although a better name might've been David's new parmesan cheese dish guest-starring pasta.), but Angel's had barely been touched.

Angel twirled about a third of her serving onto her fork and shoved it into her mouth, hoping nobody would notice that she'd been off in the clouds.

"Yuh Nuhni?" She asked.

Nani stifled a laugh.

"Can you play us a song?"

Angel would've breathed a sigh of relief if there had been any space left in her mouth.

"Shuh." She held up her guitar. "Ah-ee reh-quehsts?"

"Whatever comes to mind," Nani smiled.

Angel thought while she chewed. There were so many songs to choose from, but that was something that she adored about music.  
She glanced at Stitch, who looked at her with excitement in his black eyes. Whatever Angel was going to play, Stitch already loved it.

Angel swallowed. She had the perfect idea. It wasn't really an electric guitar song, but she thought she could make it work.

She winked at Stitch and got started.

"_It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside.  
I'm not one of those who can easily hide.  
I don't have much money, but boy, if I did,  
I'd buy a big house where we both could live."_

She threw in a quick little guitar solo. Everyone at the table lit up at it. Stitch was radiant.

"_If I were a sculptor...But then again, no,  
Or a man who makes potions in a traveling show.  
I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do.  
My gift is my song…"_

Her eyes met Stitch's.

"_And this one's for you."_

As she played, she swayed towards him. With each step, he lit up brighter and brighter, as if he were about to be given the most spectacular gift in the universe.  
Angel knew because she felt exactly the same way.

"_So excuse me forgetting, but these things I do.  
You see, I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue.  
Anyway, the thing is, what I really mean…"_

Stitch sang the next line with her.

"_Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen."_

Angel sat down beside him.

"_And you can tell everybody that this is your song.  
It may be quite simple but now that it's done,  
I hope you don't mind,  
I hope you don't mind,  
That I've put down in words,  
How wonderful life is while you're in the world."_

Angel and Stitch touched noses. She thought about what 021 had said to her and felt once again overcome with pity. In a strange way, she hoped that she would see her again.

She also thought about her siren song. She realized that she'd forgotten the lyrics to it.

"_I hope you don't mind,  
I hope you don't mind,  
That I've put down in words,  
How wonderful life is while you're in the world."_


	3. Episode 2: Smooth Criminal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finder is on the case when Bonnie & Clyde start a new string of robberies.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Hound Dog" - Elvis Presley  
*"Killer Queen" - Queen  
*"Smooth Criminal" - Michael Jackson

**Episode 2: ** _ **Smooth Criminal** _

**I**

_"Friday night. Time for regular shmoes to clock out and go blow their hard-earned cash on whatever swingin' joint they can find._

_"I, however, ain't no regular shmoe. I don't blow my cash. I don't get to go to swingin' joints unless I'm checkin' out a crime scene, meeting an informant, or passin' through one on a chase scene._

_"Some people might say this ain't no life for no one. Others might call me a nut for stickin' with it for so long. To all of 'em, I say-"_

_"Ultra-glue! Call now and get a second tube free!"_

I bumped the remote with my heel when I went to grab some popcorn. Now I'll have to wait for the repeat to get the rest of that line. Suppose that's what I get for havin' my feet on the table.

Maybe I shouldn't be watchin' TV on the job. But in this vicious cycle of lost and found, ya need a little escapism from time to time to get through it all.

"Um, excuse me, Mr. Finder?"

I stood up to see the kid who'd come up to my little shack. If her pale, milky skin couldn't tell me that she was a tourist, then the smell of fries and car seats comin' off of her could. She was sniffling. I've seen too many snifflers in my time.

"Aloha. Lost?" Asking is only a professional courtesy. Something's always lost.

She gave me a sob-story about an inflatable unicorn that she lost under a big wave. Both the description and the fry-car smell seemed familiar. I just might've stumbled across the thing on my morning beach comb. I popped into the back and came back with the inflatable unicorn in question.

"Oh, thank you, thank you, Mr. Finder! You're the best!"

I was pulled into a group hug with the kid and the unicorn.

Something's always lost. Least I can do is look.

When the kid was gone, I turned back to the TV. The commercials were over, and the news was on.

Funny thing about the news; they never have any good news.

_"And in more recent news, a local car dealership was robbed in the early hours of this morning._

_"Thus far, authorities have concluded that most, if not all, of the stolen items were car batteries._

_"The security footage was erased, except this screenshot which authorities believe was deliberately left by the perpetrators as a taunt."_

They showed a picture that only a strong-stomached dentist should ever have to see.

There was the inside of a yellow-toothed, blue-tongued mouth. Looked big enough to swallow one of those inflatable unicorns. Seemed like it was breathin' on the camera. I could smell it through the screen. Soda. Potato chips. Black coffee and not even the good kind.

Only things I know with mouths like that are my own kind. Our portly pop calls us Experiments. My pal Lilo down the beach calls us cousins. And that nice Mrs. Hasagawa lady at the fruit market calls us funny-looking kitty-cats. I call us nothin' but a few turned-around criminals tryin' to do some good on this harsh, unforgiving planet.

"Aloha, Finder. I got you a smoothie."

"Oh. Thanks, Nani. Have fun renting surfboards."

But a thief like this stinks like two particulars of my kind. Their numbers are 149 and 150, but they prefer-Ooh, watermelon, my favorite-prefer to be called Bonnie and Clyde.

I worked with 'em a while back if you can believe it. We were part of a rescue team breakin' into a ship where a bunch of our kind was locked up.

For me, it was about bein' there for my cousins. For Bonnie and Clyde, it's always about the challenge. They'll steal anything if there's fun to be had doin' it. They'd take candy from a baby if the baby had a state-of-the-art security system just beggin' to be hacked.

Maybe it's just the finder in me, but it doesn't sit right with me that anyone could be so happy takin' stuff from people. It's the kinda thing to make my claws curl and my snout wrinkle.

You know what? I've spent enough time in my little lost-and-found shack here on the beach. So, right there, I promised myself; soon as I finish this yummy-licious watermelon smoothie, I'm settin' out to catch Bonnie and Clyde once and for all.

**II**

Weeks ago, I found this snazzy hat just sittin' there on the sand. One of 'em brown fedoras like you see in the movies, usually paired with a trenchcoat on a rainy street or with a leather jacket in a spooky temple.

Nobody's come to claim it yet. Since I'm goin' out, figured it'd be more useful on my noggin than in a pile of lost stuff.

Sometimes lost-and-found doesn't mean by the same person.

I'd 'a worn a trenchcoat too, but Hawaii's warm enough as it is. Can't be sweatin' waterfalls on the job. Least not 'till the chase scene.

The car dealership was swarmin' with reporters, cops, and salesmen wonderin' if they'd still have a job tomorrow.

Buncha people were lookin' under car hoods hopin' to find some kinda case-crackin' clue.

They don't know that all ya need is a galaxy-class sniffer and a bit of fur from the Experiment you're after.

The only trouble was I didn't really wanna get spotted. Cops don't like third parties creepin' 'round their crime scenes unless they got some credentials.

I don't have a badge or nothin'. All I got is a cool hat and a sniff of my cute 'lil snout. Maybe there's a rookie on duty who'll let me in if I let him scratch behind my ears. I enjoy a good ear-scratchin' as much as the next Experiment, but this ain't ear-scratchin' time. This is findin' time. So it looks like I gotta take the stealth approach.

Started off easy enough. All those big cars made for lots of cover for a tiny guy like me. I peeked out from behind a tire to see if the coast was clear. Guess who I spotted? Big guy and I mean _big. _Not quite Gantu big but a decent runner-up. Bald, sunglasses, and a tux so sharp he could cut ya to ribbons with it. His business card will say Bubbles, but his knuckles will say Cobra.

I know Cobra. He's scary, but he's helped my cousins and me out plenty 'a times before. But he doesn't like people buttin' in on his work. And he _really _doesn't want us Experiments stickin' our long snouts where they don't belong.

Sorry, Cobra, but this bamboozled car hood is _exactly _where my long snout belongs.

Cobra took a call; somethin' about Roswell or the fate of the free world. I was more interested in this little bit of lime-green fur stuck to the top of this car hood. Most people would miss it. Most people aren't my nose.

Definitely from Bonnie. Probably from her toe.

I took one last quick sniff around. Strange. See, once you've worked with someone, ya don't forget their smell. Been nearly a year since that job and I can still remember the whole team's scent. Since I'd just found Bonnie's, I was expectin' to spot Clyde's, as well. The two are practically joined at the hip, so they've both got that crummy-coffee scent about 'em. Only difference is Clyde's scent also has a bit of burn to it; comes from that metal hand 'a his. But my nose just couldn't spot it. And my nose is never wrong.

Are those two splittin' up to hit more targets at once? Doesn't seem like their style. Whatever it is, I'll be sure to ask 'em when I find 'em.

I hopped down and started makin' my way, lettin' my nose take the lead. After a little while, I happened to glance behind me. Guess who I should find tailin' after me? Mr. big baldy himself. Betcha he was lookin' to book me for pokin' around his crime scene. Maybe he wanted to hire me to do what I was already doin'. I don't have a problem with money, but I do have a problem with people tellin' me how to do my job.

Whatever Cobra was after me for, I knew it'd only slow me down.

Now, I could 'a just flown away from there; a little trick I can do by spinnin' my ears like propellers. But that'd just make me look guilty. Probably also make Cobra call all his boys to look up in the sky for a flyin' thing in a hat and track 'im down. Then I'd never get any work done.

I had to lose him a different way. Something that would look like I'd gotten away from him entirely by accident.

_Well, you ain't nothin' but a hound dog,_

_Cryin' all the time!_

I knew those voices. Two more old pals from the Gantu job; Stitch and Angel. I could smell 'em; a chilly saltiness from lots of time at the beach. I could hear 'em; they're always singin' some dramatic ditty by singers with weird names I can never quite remember. Aluminum Blimp or Bean Casserole or any one of a hundred guys named John. But I couldn't _see _'em; this big ol' gaggle of people was in the way, snappin' pictures and a few even dancin'.

Just the distraction I needed.

_Oh, you ain't nothin' but a hound dog,_

_Cryin' all the time!_

I picked up my pace, makin' sure to look more like I was runnin' to the show and not away from Cobra. An advantage of bein' a little guy is I could squeeze through the crowd like nothin'. Only took me a second to get to the heart of the cluster.

Angel and Stitch were dancin', singin', playin' on their fancy new electric gizmo. It was hooked up to this box which made everythin' they did nice and loud. Seemed like they were havin' the time of their lives. They probably didn't even know that our cleptomaniac cousins were on the loose again.

I envied them a little. But I don't get paid to be envious. Or to listen to music. Actually, I don't even get paid to track down alien thieves. Point is; I should get back to work.

_Oh, you ain't never caught a rabbit,_

_And you ain't no friend o' mine!_

I lowered my hat and took off down an alleyway behind the performers, gettin' back on my trail once I was outta sight.

No one was any the wiser.

"Aloha, Finder. Cool hat."

"See youga at beach."

**III**

I managed to follow my nose the rest of the way without any more trouble. My nose took me on a tour of almost the whole island. I passed Lilo's hula school, Sparky's lighthouse, Spooky's creepy ol' mansion, and finally arrived at the place.

It was some dingy abandoned warehouse on the edge of town. I really wish these bug businesses would get rid of these things when they were done with 'em. Then we might have fewer Bonnies and Clydes.

I peeked in through an open window. The lights were off. I still had Bonnie's scent, but it was a little faded now. Seems I just missed her.

I couldn't smell Clyde at all. That just wasn't sittin' right with me. I have my problems with Bonnie and Clyde, but I know what they're like. Far as I'm concerned; the grass grows, the sun shines, and Bonnie and Clyde stick together. Whatever's gotten them to split up, it's gotta be bad news, probably for them but almost definitely for me.

I crept in and found a lightswitch. The place was a pigsty. Just a buncha stuff everywhere; don't know what was left by the original owners or by Bonnie. I spotted some crates, a lotta wire, an old oven, a record player, some tubes of that Ultra-Glue stuff, and those car batteries. Even the pile of lost stuff at my shack is more organized.

The least messy thing was a space near the center. There was only a ragged old armchair; the kind of thing which usually ends up spending forever in my shack. I found a notebook on it.

I thought about my cousin, Nosy. I always give him smack for bein' such a snoop. Guess I'm a hypocrite now.

Bonnie's handwriting was horrible. Fortunately, I'm fluent in scribble.

First page was blueprints for some kinda crazy box-lookin' gizmo. The etchy title was _Jetpack. _Perfect. Bonnie's slippery enough with her feet on the ground. The last thing I need is her flyin' from heist to heist.

The next page was a to-do list. Looked like she was nearly done with it. _Wires, heater, tools, spare parts, _and _batteries _were already crossed off. There was only one thing left at the bottom; _noisy box thingy (Blue-boy and Pinkie.)_

For cryin' out loud, Bonnie. If you're gonna rob somebody, at least get their names right.

If she really had just left, then it meant that I still had a chance to catch up with her. I just hope that crazy jetpack of hers isn't ready yet.

I got outta there as quick as I could, but before I did, I nabbed a tube of that Ultra-Glue stuff. I had an idea, and a real darn clever one, if I say so myself.

**IV**

No time to run. I did my little ear-propellor trick and took to the air. Stitch and Angel like to move their show around, so they were most likely somewhere else by now. Fortunately, with that nifty noise-box of theirs, they're even easier to hear than they are to smell.

_She keeps her Moet et Chandon,_

_In her pretty cabinet._

_Let them eat cake, she says,_

_Just like Marie Antoinette._

They were closer to the seaside now, drawing in a crowd of street-goers and beach-goers alike. I perched on a nearby lamppost, gettin' a perfect vantage point of the whole scene.

_A built-in remedy,_

_For Krushchev and Kennedy._

_At anytime an invitation,_

_You can't decline._

I scanned the crowd. No Bonnie. I looked at the nearby buildings. No Bonnie. I glanced up just in case there was a fiery hunk of metal rocketin' towards me. Nope.

_Caviar and cigarettes,_

_Well-versed in etiquette,_

_Extraordinarily nice._

I looked down again. My snout was suddenly hit by a whiff of a rotten smell. I looked at Stitch and Angel's noise-box; just beside it, on the pavement, was a manhole cover ever-so-slowly sliding open. A pair of lime-furred hands slithered out towards the noise-box.

Crafty little trog.

_She's a Killer Queen!_

_Gunpower, gelatin,_

_Dynamite with a laser beam!_

_Guaranteed to blow your mind!_

I leaped down and snatched those sneaky arms.

_Anytime!_

"Ha! Got youga, Bonnie! Youga under arrest!"

The music stopped. Everyone was lookin' at me. I was just about to tell Angel and Stitch to go back to playin' when I was suddenly hoisted high into the air. But I wasn't doin' my propellor trick. I looked up and saw Bonnie grinnin' at me. Behind her was this giant metal box spittin' enough fire to make my cousin Heat look like an ice cream sundae.

"Heya, Finder," Bonnie said, talkin' real smooth for someone high in the air with a fire-spitter strapped to their back.

"Long time no see. Hate to leave ya hangin', but I've gotta dash."

She sent me fallin' with a kick to the gut. She's small, but she packs as much punch as a bowl of...Punch...If ya get my drift.

I managed to get my ears goin' before I became a Finder-cake. Bonnie was already on the move with her jet pack. I took off down another street, hopin' to cut her off. She made a hard turn and ended up passin' me by. I managed to hold onto her foot for two whole seconds before she twisted outta my grasp.

I was upside-down for a moment, during which I saw a raspberry being blown at me.

"Wanna play that way, Bonnie?!" I reached under my hat, took out the tube of Ultra-Glue, and squirted just a teeny bit onto my finger.

"Okitaka!"

I managed to pass Bonnie during another turn. I reached out my gluey finger and, _"Gotcha," _stuck it to the tip of her toe.

I found myself goin' faster than fruitcake on Christmas. I don't know if any of my cousins could've handled it, but it was no problem for a hardened sleuth like myself.

_"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh! Meega gonna hurl!"_

I was gettin' on Bonnie's nerves. My first clue was when she made me slam into a big ol' billboard, and my second was when she made me hit a street light.

To that, I said, do your worst! I ain't backin' down now!

_"Oh, owie, owie! My nose!"_

She tried to get me with the side of a building, but I was ready this time. I landed on the wall with my feet, bringin' our bird's-eye tour of the town to a halt.

She pulled, I pulled, and then we were rollin' onto the rooftop. There was a big bang, and then Bonnie's jetpack sputtered out.

My head felt like it had been through the dryer and then left inside overnight. If it hadn't been for the glue, Bonnie would've had an excellent opportunity to slip away.

"Aw, _man,_" she exclaimed, throwing off her busted machine. "You got any idea how long it takes to build one 'a these with just Earth tech?!"

"Naga." I stood up, trying to look less sore and more imposing. It was tricky; I kept having to pull my hand back while Bonnie hopped on one foot.

"But know how long youga be in slammer!"

Bonnie looked at me and laughed. "Aw, c'mon, Finds! Ya wouldn't have put this much effort into catching me just to uphold the law." She took a seat on top of her jetpack, tugging me forward.

I leaned against the machine, trying my best to look like I'd meant to do it. A tip of my hat seemed to do the trick.

"I mean, ya _could _just hand me over to the fuzz if ya wanted, but you'll never know _why _I've been up to all this. And that's what's really been drivin' ya nuts all day, ain't it?"

My gut was tellin' me to forget it, but my brain told me it was gonna snap without that last piece of the puzzle.

What can I say? I hate to leave anythin' lost.

"Okitaka," I said. "Where is Clyde? What jetpack for? Why need Stitch and Angel's music gizmo?"

"Wow, it really _has _been drivin' ya nuts, huh?" Bonnie exhaled and then began her story.

"See, Clyde and I spent some time out in space after the Gantu job. We pulled a few heists, but none of 'em had quite the same kick as that last one we all did together. We thought it might be a sign that it was time to call it quits. We came back here and pretty much instantly got nabbed by three of our least-friendly cousins. 021, 621, and 627 to be exact. Buncha wackjobs who wanna change all you guys back to your rotten old ways. They've got some new devices they wanna use against you guys, but they need one for each of ya. They're outta parts, so they wanted me to swipe more. That ol' box that Blue n' Pink have is the most important part. Then the jerks took Clyde just to make sure I'd do it."

"...What about jetpack?" I asked.

"Well, I wasn't _really _gonna help 'em, was I? I was gonna make somethin' for myself with the stuff they wanted, give 'em a box 'a useless junk, spring Clyde, then give Blue n' Pink their doo-hickey back. Only needed it to trick the three nutjobs, anyhow...'Course, now I gotta bust outta prison again before I can do all that. I just hope Clyde can take care of himself 'till then."

If you'd told me this morning that I'd be thinkin' about doin' what I'm about to do, I would 'a told ya to pull the other one. But it's like I said; something's always lost. Least I can do is look.

"Let meega help," I said.

Bonnie scoffed. "Just 'cause you're stuck to my leg doesn't mean ya gotta pull it, too."

"Naga pulling. Meega help save Clyde."

Bonnie looked surprised. I wish I'd brought my camera; it was a rare sight.

"You're serious?"

"Meega find lost things, give them back. That's job..." I pointed my strictest claw at her. (Actually, it was my second strictest. My strictest was glued to her foot.)

"But no more heists. Gotta be good. Deal?"

"...Deal."

We shook on it. I'm not gonna lie, it felt pretty cool; doin' a team-up for the greater good. Probably didn't _look _as cool, since I was shakin' Bonnie's hand with my right hand and shakin' her foot with my left. Good thing we were on the roof or people might've thought we were a couple of weirdos.

"Lucky for you," Bonnie said, "I've got some Ultra-Solvent back in my stash."

**V**

A trip back to the warehouse and a tube of Ultra-Solvent later, Bonnie and I were unattached and on our way to spring Clyde.

On the way, she described the crooks to me. 021 has arms that start here and end in California. 621's skinny but quick on a trigger. And 627's quiet. Not the library type of quiet. The type of quiet I usually hear when I get on stage at open mic nights.

They were the type best left to the Stitches and Angels of the world, but if we could at least Clyde, I'd write this one up as a victory.

Bonnie led me through the forest. Soon we were sloshin' through an ankle-deep stream. I was gettin' flashbacks to the Gantu job. At any moment, I expected to see that big, black spaceship stuck in that lake.

There was a spaceship, it was stuck in a lake, but this one was blue.

"Alright, Finds..." Bonnie said once we were hidden behind some shrubbery.

"There's an emergency exit hatch on the roof. If ya float on up there and get in, I can distract the loons while you find Clyde. Just give a whistle or somethin' once you're good to go. Much as I'd love to tussle with these guys, probably best to get the whole team back together for that one, huh?"

"Ih," I nodded.

I followed her directions and found the hatch. Once I had the thing open, I could hear Bonnie doin' her bit.

"Heya, guys!"

"You got everything, 149?" I heard 021 spit with a voice as beefy as her biceps.

"Absolutely everything!"

"Even that stupid noise-maker?"

"Everything! But ya know what? It's a lot to carry over all at once. I'm gonna need some help gettin' it from my stash."

"...Are you saying you didn't _bring _any of it?!"

"I'm saying I _couldn't. _I need your big, strong, world-ending muscles, 021."

"I...Well, I _am _glad you noticed..."

I let my ears carry me down, landing on the metal floor without so much as a tap. I could still hear Bonnie and 021 in the next room. The one I was in was dark. But in the darkness, I could make out a shape. More than that, I could make out a smell. Several smells all around the ship.

"Clyde?" I whispered to the bulky shape facing me. I took a step closer. Seemed like he was slumped over, maybe unconscious.

I hope.

"Clyde?" I tried again. Still no answer. I did, however, get another smell; the smoky scent of plasma. I spun around and found myself within kissing distance of a blaster.

"Funny finding you here, 158."

"Aloha, 621," I said, not letting him hear my fear.

"You sound squeakier than I expected...But never mind. Since you've decided to drop in, would you like to see my new invention?"

"Naga. Just want Clyde."

"Oh, you can have Clyde." 621 grinned and snapped his fingers.

I glanced over my shoulder. Clyde was lumbering towards me. I remember he used to have this cocky smirk on his big chin all the time. Not anymore. Now his face was more vacant than a half-star hotel. He was wearing some weird helmet on his head.

"Ah," I said. "That new device. What youga want Bonnie to help make."

"Do you like it?" 621 asked. "I got the idea from those ridiculous speakers you and your cousins put on your ears to listen to that stupid noise. I don't understand why anyone would willingly compromise one of their most vital senses, but I suppose such inventions have their uses when applied correctly."

I heard a door whirr open. I turned again and found Bonnie followed by 021 and 627. She was sporting the same helmet and blank expression as Clyde. In her hands, she had another helmet.

Maybe I should've just stayed in my shack.

"Have you ever heard 624's song, 158?" 621 asked me.

Took me a moment to remember that 624 was Angel. No idea how this shmuck remembers all these numbers.

"Once. Backward," I answered.

"Then you must hear it properly."

"Naga taka."

"I insist."

"Meega prefer smooth jazz."

621 snapped his fingers again, and Clyde's arms were suddenly tight around me. I tried to wiggle myself free, but the big guy stuck to me like Ultra-Glue.

"Last time," 621 carried on. "624 was able to overpower her old song by merely playing her new one much louder. Without that advantage, you and the rest of our corrupted kin will be much more vulnerable to...Reconditioning."

"Don't squirm, 158," 021 spat. "It's for your own good."

Bonnie lumbered towards me, bringing the helmet up to my head.

I moved around as much as I could. If this was how these guys were gonna take me out, I was gonna make sure it was the most annoying part of their day.

I had a good run. I found a lot of stuff. I made a lot of people happy. Even if I end up bein' just a zombie wreckin' planet-after-planet, at least a few people here on Earth will look at those things they almost thought were gone forever and think of the little guy with the long nose who helped 'em out.

Suppose that's all I can ask for.

Bonnie finally got the helmet on. I waited for it to start; waited for Angel's soft, soothing voice to take me away.

_Annie, are you okay?_

_Are you okay, Annie?_

I know I only heard the thing backward before, but I'm pretty sure this isn't the forward version.

I opened my eyes. Bonnie winked at me.

_You've been hit by,_

_You've been stuck by,_

_A Smooth Criminal!_

Oh, you clever trog!

She went back to the zombie face. I made a face of my own and Clyde put me down. I did my best to imitate Bonnie and Clyde's bored posture. It seemed to be working.

_Annie, are you okay?_

_Won't you tell us that you're okay?_

"We'd better go to that stash," 627 said. "See if 149 really did as she was told."

"My thoughts exactly," 621 replied. "149, lead the way, will you?"

"Sure thing," Bonnie droned.

_There's a sign at the window,_

_That he struck you,_

_A crescendo, Annie._

We marched out of the ship with the three shmucks following close behind. All we had to do now was get that helmet off of Clyde and skedaddle. It seemed so simple. The only thing was filling in that little gap; how exactly we go about it.

First problem was that Clyde was a big fella. How was I gonna reach that helmet all the way up there?

Oh, right.

"Ugh. Feet tired..." I grunted as I did my ear trick, floating so I was level with Clyde's head.

I glanced behind me. 021 and 627 didn't pay much mind, but 621 was eyein' me like I was takin' too long to buy groceries. His claws hovered over a blaster on his hip.

_He came into your apartment,_

_Left the bloodstains on the carpet._

I looked down at Bonnie, hopin' she had an idea of how to buy me some time. I only needed a second or two to pull the thing off.

She gave me a wink.

This ought to be good.

_Then you ran into the bedroom,_

_You were struck down,_

_It was your doom, Annie._

Bonnie stopped, licked her finger, and held it to the sky.

"What are you doing?" 021 demanded.

"Checking the wind," Bonnie answered.

"The wind?" 627 questioned. "What does that have to with-"

_"Wet willy!" _Bonnie spun around and jammed her finger into 627's ear.

621's eyes were off me for about a millisecond, but that was all I needed.

_Aaow!_

"Oh, _finally!" _Clyde exclaimed once he was free. He spun around and clutched 621's head with his big, meaty hand.

"I was gettin' _really _sick 'a hearin' that!" He hurled the shmuck into the air. I made a wish.

Clyde spun around, his fancy metal hand lighting up with a plasma blast. He fired just before Bonnie met a rather unpleasant fate from 627's laser eyes. The poor red guy went hurtling through the trees.

All the while, I was clinging to his giant shoulders. I know I'm a little guy, but I felt pretty microscopic beside this tank of an Experiment.

Clyde went to give 021 a good ol' metal hook on the jaw, but she caught it like it were a baseball. I don't mean like how a player catches a baseball. You know those crazy fans who bring gloves to a game, wait in the bleachers, and somehow the ball always manages to find its way to them? That's what it was like; like 021 woke up today knowing she was gonna catch that punch.

She had this big, hungry grin. Just thinkin' about it now makes me shiver.

Wantin' to get that rotten grin outta my sight, I ran down Clyde's arm and slammed his helmet onto 021's head. Her face went blank. She didn't say anything.

"Wow," Clyde said. "Did it work?"

_"Of course it didn't work, you idiots!" _021 screamed. She threw Clyde and me over her shoulder like he was a garbage bag and I was a bit of banana peel stickin' outta the side. We landed with a splash in the stream, and she towered over us.

"We're not _stupid! _621 fixed our DNA so 624's song can't affect us!"

She was screamin' at us so loud she probably deafened someone on the other side of the island.

I felt sorry for her. I can't imagine what it must be like to feel so angry. It can't be any way to live.

On the other hand, I was also terrified of having my head caved in.

_"There's nothing you can do to stop mhtkfhxidkgjapfjyhxkfofhdbdo-"_

Bonnie shoved 021 off of Clyde and me. It looked easier than it should've been, seein' as 021 is about 99% muscle. As I stood up, I noticed that the big shmuck wasn't gettin' up. She was just lyin' there, mumblin' while her eyes flashed a creepy green color.

"The heck…?" Bonnie muttered.

It looked real painful. But, as we heard the other two shmucks catchin' up to us through the trees and water, I remembered something from one of those black-and-whites.

_Not my circus, not my monkeys._

Bonnie, Clyde, and I booked it outta that forest. I still don't know what was going on with 021, but I guess I can't find out everything, huh?

**VI**

_"Some people might say this ain't no life for no one. Others might call me a nut for stickin' with it for so long. To all of 'em, I say; betcha I've found out more than you'll ever know in your whole life."_

Funny how the morning after an exciting day can be so ordinary. I combed the beach, found eleven pairs of sunglasses, had eight claimed, and drank another super-delicious smoothie.

Suppose that's life. You always snap back to what you're used to. At least I found a repeat of that scene I missed yesterday.

Ya gotta find the little things.

There was still a little something else new waiting for me today, though.

"Mr. Finder."

I usually only hear that when someone's lost something, but this guy sounded like he'd found exactly what he was looking for.

"Aloha, Mr. Cobra. Lost?"

"I am investigating the recent string of robberies…" He knelt, looking at me with those razor-sharp eyeballs peering from behind those expensive sunglasses. He could've bitten my snout off if he wanted.

"Seeing as I saw you near a crime scene yesterday, I wanted to know what you knew about it."

I shook my head. "Nothing. Just walking. Showing new hat." I tipped it. It was a little smushed from getting slammed under a brainwashing helmet yesterday.

"That's a shame...But if you knew anything, even the faintest, most seemingly insignificant crumb of information, you would tell me." He stated it like a fact; like two plus two is four.

Ya know what? I think if Clyde and 021 stood on each other's shoulders, Cobra would still be bigger than them.

I looked him right in his pointy eyes. "Ih." I didn't let him see how scared I was.

And this time I mean it.

I don't know what it was. Maybe he believed me. Maybe he was letting me off with a warning. Maybe he didn't think he'd look tough beating up a little guy like me. But Cobra just wished me a good day and went on his way.

_Phew._

Not long after Cobra left, that thing I was looking forward to showed up; a big ol' truck. I went to greet the drivers.

"Heya Finds!" Bonnie chirped.

"We got everything outta our stash," Clyde said. "Just like ya said."

"Bootifa." I patted them each on the back. "Time for part one Finder Training...Giving back."

"Sounds fun," Bonnie said. "And who knows? Maybe you'll learn a thing or two from us."

They ruffled the fur at the back of my head.

Ya know, I never thought about taking on help, but I think it'll do me a world of good.

Funny what ya find when you're not even looking.


	4. Episode 3: Purple Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When a power outage plunges the whole island into darkness, Sparky rises to the challenge. However, things get harder for him once it starts raining.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Holdin' Out for a Hero" - Bonnie Tyler  
*"Thriller" - Michael Jackson  
*"Purple Rain" - Prince

**Episode 3: _Purple Rain_**

**I**

_Where have all the good men gone and where are all the gods?_

Just a plain old night in this plain old lighthouse, munching on plain old batteries and listening to this plain old CD Player.

_Where's the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?_

Actually, he took that back. Everything was better with Bonnie Tyler.

_Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?_

Sparky gazed out at the waves in the distance. No ships. These days, they usually came while there was still daylight.

Sparky didn't mind a lazy night, but he did mind lazy months.

The most exciting thing lately had been getting mind-controlled by some new cousins using a recording of Angel's old song. But by the time he'd been freed, Angel and Stitch had already solved the problem.

It wasn't so much the boredom. He just didn't want to feel like a battery in a machine that nobody used.

_Late at night, I toss, and I turn, and I dream of what I need._

He rolled over, stretching his back, fingers, toes, and antennae, chomped down on another D battery, and went to look at the lights of the town down below.

But he didn't see the lights. He didn't see anything but the moon.

"Uh-oh..." He muttered. "Power outage..."

Entire homes would be trapped in darkness. Anyone still outside would be lost and terrified. Who knew how long it would be until they got the electricity going again?

Unless...

_I need a hero!_

_I'm holding out for a hero 'till the end of the night!_

_He's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be fast,_

_And he's gotta be fresh from the fight!_

Yes; _he _could do it! He had all the electricity the town needed coursing through him. All he had to do was get to the town generator. He could see it from the lighthouse; a tiny box of a building on the other side of town. Getting there would be no problem; a twenty, maybe thirty-second flight, tops.

Why the heck not?

"Taka, Bonnie."

Sparky took off his headphones. He bounded off the metal railing, somersaulted in the air, and rocketed towards the generator.

He grinned, imagining all the people lost in the darkness down below, looking up and seeing hope in a streak of lightning flying across the night sky.

_I need a hero!_

_I'm holding out for a hero 'till the morning light!_

_He's gotta be sure, and it's gotta be soon,_

_And he's gotta be larger than-_

_KRAKOW!_

Sparky couldn't hear anything for a while. He felt something burning on his shoulder. Then on his head. Soon, his entire body was on fire.

It was raining.

_"Aw, come on!"_ He screamed at the sky as he struggled to keep his eyes open.

_"Why now?!"_

He couldn't see the generator. He couldn't see anything but black and orange.

Sometimes he'd get a little splash at the beach. It'd hurt, but all he had to do was back away, and he was just fine. He tried to do that again, but there was nowhere to back away to.

There was only more pain.

After a minute, it was too painful to even keep flying.

Then he was lost in darkness, too.

**II**

It was cold. That was good; the cold was better than burning.

Sparky pulled himself to his feet. He had been asleep in a dirty old armchair. In the shadows, he could make out the shape of a door, curtains, and a lamp. In the darkness, they seemed twisted, as if they were laughing at him.

He looked up. A big drop of water, as big as his head, was coming right for him.

_KRAKOW!_

_"Naga!" _He cried, jumping back into the armchair. _"Not again!"_

Already he could feel the burning again.

"Hm. I wasn't even _trying _to scare you that time," a deep voice said. "I must be better than I give myself credit for."

Sparky peeked again at the giant killer water drop. It had two yellow eyes which lit up the darkness.

"Oh...Aloha, Spooky."

"Aloha yourself, cousin Sparky." Spooky dropped from the ceiling, bouncing into his translucent gelatin form like a wave splashing onto the beach.

Sparky didn't want to think about waves.

"Are you alright?" Spooky asked. "That was quite the fall you took."

"Okitaka..." Sparky curled up in the armchair. As he tried to steady his breathing, he found that his body felt sore. It was also still a little damp. Still burning. Just a little, but still burning.

"Not that I don't enjoy having visitors," Spooky continued. "Especially on such a dark and miserable night, but whyever would you go flying during a rainstorm?"

Sparky squirmed in his seat. He hoped he might be able to dry himself against the chair.

"Generator..." He muttered. "Get power back."

"Ah," Spooky nodded his gelatinous head. "I suspected so, but wasn't certain."

He slithered onto the arm of Sparky's chair. Sparky avoided his eyes. They were warm, but that reminded him of the burning.

"That's very brave of you."

Sparky curled himself tighter, hiding his face. He was feeling a lot of things, but brave wasn't one of them.

"Naga."

"Look at me, Sparky." Spooky's voice became stern. To Sparky, it sounded like the thunder outside.

"...Please."

Sparky peeked.

"Do you remember when that asteroid was going to hit Earth? And Stitch and Lilo asked us to help them stop it?"

"...Ih."

"How did that make you feel?"

"...Scared...Naga sure if we can stop it."

"So did I. I'd never done anything like that before."

"Ih. Meega too."

"Like how you've never gotten through the rain to reach a generator. But we did it. We were scared, but we did it. _You _did it. That's how I know you're brave."

Sparky looked out the window, seeing the rain illuminated by the moon.

The asteroid was scary, but no asteroid could make him feel that burning.

"Look..." Spooky continued. "If you want to stay here, that's okay. I have some old board games. We can make a night of it. But if you still want to go for that generator, and I'm a telepath, so I know you do, then I'll do everything I can to help you be brave."

Sparky couldn't look away from the window. He couldn't look away from the rain.

"I'll let you think about it." Spooky slithered away.

Sparky stared at the rain until he felt like he was out there with it. Even when he shut his eyes, he could still feel that wretched burning.

He wasn't going to be able to escape it. Not tonight.

Well, if that was the case, then what the heck?

**III**

"Do you feel alright, Sparky?"

"Ih."

"Are the boots too tight?"

"Boots good."

"Can you see through the hood-"

"Isa good, Spooky...Taka."

Spooky owned a flashlight, but he didn't own a raincoat or boots. However, he was a shapeshifter.

If it weren't for the deep voice coming from them, Sparky would've thought he was wearing ordinary raingear.

As they stepped out into the dark shower, Spooky applied one last finishing touch; a tape player and headphones tucked under the hood. Spooky told Sparky it would help him relax on the way.

"Any requests?"

"Naga..." Sparky shook his head. "Youga choose."

"Alright...I'll play you one of my favorites."

Sparky began his trek, guided by the flashlight and by the music.

He didn't feel any burning. Yet.

_It's close to midnight,_

_And something evil's lurking in the dark._

The town was different in the dark and the rain. Sparky knew that nothing had really changed, but that didn't stop all the buildings from seeming so twisted.

_Under the moonlight,_

_You see a sight that almost stops your heart._

Sparky had gotten used to flying places. The generator had seemed so close from the lighthouse, but now it seemed like it would take ages to reach it. Sparky wished he could turn back to the mansion, but with each splashing step he took, that idea seemed worse and worse.

_You try to scream,_

_But terror takes the sound before you make it._

Before long, Sparky's flashlight hovered over another person. For a few seconds, he felt calm; it was nice to know that it wasn't just him and Spooky out here.

Then he noticed that the person, a portly bald man in a green Hawaiian shirt, was on his knees, reaching down into some big square hole in the pavement. Around him was construction tape, dampened to soggy mush on the road by the rain, as well as a diagonal sign; _Pipeline Reconstruction. _Beside him was a very familiar electric guitar.

_You start to freeze,_

_As horror looks you right between the eyes._

_You're paralyzed._

"Gaba?" Sparky approached the man.

"I-I-I-I c-c-couldn't see in the dark," the man stammered, looking frantically between Sparky and the hole.

"I f-f-fell d-down there. Th-those two c-came by and j-jumped in t-to help me out. B-B-But then the rain got worse and-and-..."

Sparky gazed into the hole. It was hard to tell how deep it was; it was filled with rainwater up to about three feet below ground. An ice cream cone floated in the murky water. Sparky shone his flashlight down and, as he feared, saw some bits of pink and blue beneath it.

Sparky felt the burning again.

_'Cause this is Thriller!_

_Thriller night!_

"Breathe, Sparky," Spooky told him. "We can do something. We can-"

Angel splashed to the surface, getting her face and arms above the water for a second before she sank again.

Sparky and the man reached into the hole. Seconds later, Angel emerged again, but couldn't reach their extending fingers. She tried to stick her palms to the wall, but they only slid against the sopping surface.

_And no one's gonna save you,_

_From the beast about to strike._

"Sparky," Spooky said. "You have an idea."

"...Naga. Won't work." Sparky tried to stretch his fingers further.

"You think you could reach them if that man holds onto you."

"Naga...What if drop meega?"

"He won't."

"Maybe."

"Sparky...I promise; he won't drop you. And neither will I."

There was more burning. Sparky looked again at the bits of blue and pink under the water. He thought about what they might be feeling.

"Okitaka."

_You know it's Thriller!_

_Thriller night!_

"Excuse meega?" Sparky showed the man his booted foot. "Hold this, please."

The man grabbed Sparky's ankle so tightly that the Experiment couldn't feel his foot. But that was okay; that meant he wouldn't fall in.

Sparky was lowered in close enough to the water that he could reach out and touch it. It was black; like a giant gaping jaw rising up to swallow him.

Something did rise up at him.

_You're fighting for your life inside a,_

_Killer!_

_Thriller!_

_Tonight!_

"Aloha, Sparky," Angel coughed.

"Aloha, Angel," Sparky said as they clutched each other's wrists. He tried not to think about the darkness and the burning.

"Nice new hair."

"Taka." Angel blew the soggy stripe of drooping fur from her face. "Like your coat."

"Oh. Naga coat. Spooky."

"Aloha, Angel."

"Oh. Aloha, Spooky."

Sparky felt the man pulling them out. He nearly screamed when he saw a hand from the water clutching Angel's ankle, but stopped himself once he realized that it was Stitch.

The Experiments flopped onto the road. The cold, soaking pavement felt strangely comfortable.

Sparky sat up when he heard crying.

"I'm sorry," the man sobbed, hiding his face. "It's my fault. I almost got you killed."

"Naga, naga." Angel picked up her guitar with one arm and pulled the man into a hug with the other.

"Rain nobody's fault." Stitch joined in. "We help youga. Youga help us. Right, cousin?"

The man sniffed. He wiped his face, which did nothing to change how soaked he, Stitch, and Angel were. They all looked like they were melting.

Looking at them, Sparky felt warm. Not the burning sort of warm. The kind of warm when he was relaxing in his lighthouse with a delicious pack of batteries.

"See?" Spooky said. "You didn't know you could do it, but you did."

"Ih...Taka, Spooky."

Sparky walked his friends home.

"Hey," the man called over the wind from his porch. "When it stops raining, I should take you guys out for ice cream!"

Sparky stayed with Stitch and Angel until they were at the foot of the steps leading to their house. He had never seen the place so dark. It usually looked so lively. Now it looked dead.

"Youga okitaka, Sparky?" Stitch asked.

"Ih," Sparky nodded. "Gonna get power back."

"Need help?" Angel asked.

"Naga. Meega can do it." Saying that felt good, so he repeated it. "Meega can do it."

"Okitaka." Angel and Stitch each gave him a kiss on the cheek. They were both still soaking, so he felt just a little bit of a burn, but it wasn't as bad as before.

It was only a little burn.

"Stay safe, Sparky."

"Youga, too."

He turned and carried on his journey. He kept feeling a small burn on his cheeks, but it didn't hurt.

**IV**

Sparky soon realized that he had never been in the part of town where the generator was.

Nothing about the district seemed even remotely for him. Where before there had been familiar shapes twisted into frightening ones, now there were only the scary shapes.

The burning was coming back.

"Sparky," Spooky said. "Would you like to know a trick I do whenever I feel scared?"

"Ih," Sparky whispered, trying to figure out if a crooked shape nearby was a tree or a Deadly Disemboweler about to pounce at him.

"Think about something else."

"Something else...?" Sparky looked around but could only find other shadows that might be watching their rain-coated dinner coming nearer their reach.

Something hit him in the face. It was a flyer blowing in the wind. It read; _Cirque de la Lune, featuring the Extraordinary Elastico, returns this Friday!_

It blew away just as quickly.

"Hey..." Sparky said. "Cousin Elastico's circus coming back."

"Is it?" Spooky asked. "Wonderful. I do enjoy his performances."

"Meega too. Wish meega can stretch like Elastico."

"Call Jumba. Perhaps he can arrange that."

Sparky laughed. "Naga. Like zizz-zizz."

Soon, he looked again at his surroundings. It seemed to have snuck up on him; the generator building towered over him. It was a small building, but just big enough to look like it could eat Sparky up if it wanted.

Was it really that easy?

"Spooky?" Sparky asked. The steps towards the door seemed to be the longest ones of the whole journey.

"Yes, Sparky?"

"Why youga help?"

Spooky didn't answer straight away.

"Lilo says that we all have our one true place, yes?"

"Ih."

"You generate electricity, so your place is powering the lighthouse. Elastico is stretchy, so his place is as an acrobat. Angel was made to sing, so her place is as a musician."

"...Ih."

"I can become anyone's greatest fear, so my place, right now, is to help you overcome your fear."

It was suddenly easy for Sparky to reach the door.

"Still feel scared," he whispered.

"That's okay," Spooky whispered back. "You've been very brave tonight...We all need to be reminded of our own bravery now and then."

Sparky opened the door and stepped into the darkness.

**V**

It felt good to be in only his own golden fur again. Sparky stretched out his arms and antennae and wiggled his toes. He was completely dried off. What a wonderful feeling. He'd have enjoyed it properly if it weren't for the darkness.

The flashlight didn't help much. It lit up a spot in the darkness, but it was a grainy yellow spot where something seemed to be missing; maybe a sign reading, _insert scary thing here._

Sparky shone the flashlight around. The light fell on the generator; a massive hunk of metal way at the other side of the room. There was an empty wire socket.

He wished he had more light.

Oh, wait...

Sparky lit himself up. Now the space around him was illuminated by blinding blue light. He couldn't see the whole room, but he could see the creature running right at him.

_"Eep!" _Sparky shot a bolt of lightning at the creature.

It caught it.

A crimson hand with black claws reached for Sparky, its palms glowing green.

Sparky could feel the burning again.

The hand was seized by a gelatinous form.

"You've been through quite the change, haven't you, 627?" Spooky curled around 627's arm like a watery snake. He was nearly torn away, but he slithered around 627's body to keep away from his grasping, plasma-soaked claws.

"Your mind is much more interesting than it used to be. Do you remember?" Spooky expanded into a bipedal form, locking the slashing 627 in a full-nelson. His translucent form brightened into a solid red. He peeked out and grinned with 627's face.

"Hehehehehehe...Evil...Evil, evil..."

627's face was pale one moment and then fuming in the next.

The other 627 nodded to Sparky in the direction of the generator. Sparky flew off faster than lightning.

He came within about a foot of the generator when he felt the burning again. It flew between his antennae. It hadn't hit him, but it felt like it could've if it really wanted to.

Sparky fell to the floor, his imagination rattled with images of what might have happened had the burning been even an inch lower.

"I know I can't get near you while you're all lit up like that," a voice growled from the darkness.

Sparky looked but couldn't find 621. He was somewhere beyond where his blue light could reach.

"But I never need to be near anyone...I'm surprised you made it out here in this weather, 221. I specifically saved this plan for tonight believing you'd be trapped in your lighthouse by the rain. Had I known you'd find a way here anyway, I'd have done it ages ago."

"What plan?" Sparky shouted, careful not to move even a claw.

"This generator sends power to every home on this island," 621 explained. "So I have developed a generator of my own. One which will power homes but will also send 624's song into all of them. It's a big place; wherever there's a radio or a television or one of your ridiculous gaming devices, an Experiment is guaranteed to be nearby. You won't be able to escape it."

Somewhere in the darkness, Sparky head 627 shouting.

_"You think you know me?! You know nothing about me!"_

He heard Spooky shouting, as well. In pain.

"You least of all," 621 added. "So just stay where you are. Relax. Then I won't have to hurt you. It'll all be over soon."

Sparky could see the plug of the generator only a few steps away from him. He lifted a single claw.

The ground shook beneath him.

"Don't even think about it," a burly voice snarled from the darkness.

Sparky was frozen. If this thing could shake the ground, he didn't want to imagine what it could do to him.

He lay there, frozen on the ground, with nothing to hear but his own electric buzzing and the shouting coming from Spooky.

It was burning.

"Aloha, everybody!" A familiar voice declared from the darkness. "Ready for the show?!"

There was a cracking sound and the pained shouts which had been coming from Spooky now came from 627.

"Hey, 621!" Another familiar voice. "Something on face! Isa _headbutt!"_

Another cracking sound and a shout from 621.

Sparky looked again at the plug. Suddenly, staying where he was seemed scarier than going forward.

He spun around, hurling a bolt of lightning at the giant thing behind him. He hit it just as it was reaching out with its enormous purple claws to grab him.

It screamed in pain as it reeled back. _"You little trog!"_

Sparky sprung to his feet. He dove his claw into the generator's plug.

The entire room erupted with light. Sparks flew everywhere, causing everything to flash between full color and bright shadows. Sparky could see Stitch, Angel, Spooky, 627, and 621 battling; the flashing lights made it seem that the fight was playing in stop-motion.

Sparky tried to get closer to the generator, but something stopped him. He looked down and found a yellow-furred hand grasping his ankle. He followed the arm to a pair of black eyes which were wide amid the flying sparks.

021 pulled. Sparky charged himself more, making brighter lights and shooting more sparks. 021's claws tightened around his ankle.

It burned.

"You think..." 021 growled. "A little pain..." Her eyes flashed green. "S...Sc...Scares me...?" Her eyes stayed green, and her fist was like cement trapping Sparky's ankle.

It burned.

"Think youga scare meega?" Sparky said.

She did.

Sparky made more sparks and brighter lights than he even thought he could make. 021's fist was suffocating, and the burning was volcanic.

Then there was only darkness.

**VI**

_"I never meant to cause you any sorrow._

_"I never meant to cause you any pain._

_"I only wanted, one time, to see you laughing._

_"I only want to see you laughing in the purple rain."_

He heard Angel's soothing voice backed by a gentle melody from her electric guitar. He felt a warm blanket around him. He could smell hot chocolate and..._Batteries!_

He didn't hear the pained shouting, he couldn't feel 021's stone fist grabbing him, and he didn't feel any burning.

But he remembered it.

_"Purple rain, purple rain."_

Sparky's eyes fluttered open. He was lying on a couch in Lilo's house. Angel sat on an armchair nearby, playing her guitar while Stitch curled up against her. Now that they were dry, Angel's new hair formed as a fluffy stripe covering her left eye. Sparky thought it looked cool.

The lights were on. It was still raining outside, but the rain seemed to make the house warmer than ever.

_"Purple rain, purple rain."_

"Aloha, Sparky."

Lilo was there with a tray carrying a mug of hot chocolate and a bowl of AA batteries. She set them on a lampstand beside Sparky.

"Aloha, Lilo."

"I got you some batteries. I know you like D batteries, but we only had AA. Sorry."

"AAs good. AAs yummy. Taka, Lilo."

He sat up to give her a playful lick on the cheek. She laughed, making Sparky laugh, too.

_"Purple rain, purple rain."_

Lilo's face softened. "Sparky?"

"Ih?"

"Stitch and Angel told me what you did..." She pulled Sparky into a hug. It felt as tight as 021's grip had been, only it didn't hurt. Quite the opposite.

"Thanks for being there for my ohana on a rainy night."

Sparky nuzzled her cheek. He looked over her shoulder, into the kitchen, where he found Spooky sitting at the table, a blanket over his gelatinous form, talking with Nani and David.

Spooky glanced over at him. Sparky could see a smile on his translucent face.

Sparky smiled back.

_"I only want to see you laughing in the purple rain."_


	5. Episode 4: Somebody to Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilo, Stitch, and Angel invite Felix to Elastico's circus, where the timid cleaner becomes smitten by the show's star performer. Can someone as shy and quiet as Felix earn the attention of the energetic, extroverted Elastico?
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Somebody to Love" - Queen  
*"Bennie and the Jets" - Elton John  
*"Heartbreak Hotel" - Elvis Presley  
*"Waterloo" - ABBA  
*"Flashdance...What a Feeling" - Irene Cara

**Episode 4: ** _ **Somebody to Love** _

**I**

_Can..._

_Anybody..._

_Find me..._

_Somebody to..._

_Love?_

The radio alarm woke Felix up right at 7:00 AM. He was always sure to set it to the soft music station; waking up to loud music made him anxious all day.

_Each morning I get up, I die a little._

_Can barely stand on my feet._

He lumbered over to the mirror by the window of his small room under the roof of the hula school. He brushed his teeth. He grinned at his reflection, looking at his perfectly clean teeth for only a second, then his face deflated.

_Take a look in the mirror and cry._

_Lord, what you're doing to me._

"You're such a downer; you know that?" His reflection grunted at him.

"Go away, Oscar," Felix grumbled.

Felix didn't have many people to talk to while he was stuck on Gantu's ship. Every so often, he'd get locked out of the many conversations around him, and it'd just be him and Oscar. Even once Lilo came to rescue him, Oscar stuck around. Whenever Felix thought about learning to hula or to play a sport or an instrument, he would see a picture in his mind of how much he'd embarrass himself, and Oscar was there to make sure he paid attention to that picture.

"Don't be like that," Oscar said. "I'm only sayin' what you're thinkin'. Heck, that's all I _can_ say."

_I've spent all my years in believing you,_

_But I just can't get no relief, Lord!_

Felix enjoyed his job. Everyone loved how clean he made the place look, and he loved being able to see his cousins every day. He just wished he had...He wasn't sure. Just something to look forward to. Anything.

_Somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody._

_Can anybody find me..._

Usually, he had to find little things to look forward to; Lilo's hula performances, Spooky's Halloween haunted houses, surfing competitions. He didn't compete in those, but he liked to watch. The next thing was going to be the circus; Elastico had sent Lilo some free tickets, but sent one too many, so Lilo invited Felix.

Felix shuffled over to the calendar, wondering how many more days of cleaning he'd have to meander through before earning just a little excitement.

_Somebody to love?_

Oh, never mind; it was tonight.

**II**

Felix didn't care much for crowds. He hated the shuffling and the bickering. It all seemed so disorganized. Why couldn't people just plant themselves somewhere?

With David and Nani sat to one side of him and Lilo, Angel, and Stitch to the other, he was surrounded by laughter.

Nani was laughing because David had tucked two peanuts under his upper lip to make fangs.

"I've come to drink your peanut butter," he laughed in a faux Transylvanian accent.

Stitch was laughing because Angel had her tongue halfway up his nose.

"Hey, boojiboo, give meega turn!"

"You should laugh more," Oscar said.

Lilo took Felix's hand. "You excited, Felix?"

"Oh...Ih. Never see circus before."

"I think you'll like it a lot."

The lights dimmed, and everyone (thank goodness) settled down. The spotlights hit the center of the tent, where the Ringmaster stood, waving his purple cape as he greeted the cheering audience.

Strange; Felix could've sworn he hadn't been there a moment ago.

_"Bon Soir, my friends, Bon Soir! Allow me to welcome you all to La Cirque de la Lune!"_

Throughout the show, Felix was pleasantly surprised to see a few familiar faces.

_"Next, please put your hands together for the mighty, the gigantic, the unstoppable Kixx!"_

Felix already knew that Kixx was big, but he never realized just _how _big. Even from his seat, the four-armed tank of an Experiment still seemed more massive than the people sitting around Felix.

Kixx, who looked very pleased with himself, held one humongous arm up to the sky. From an opening in the roof of the tent, a massive steel brick dropped. As it fell, Felix noticed a logo on it; _10 Tonnes._

Felix gasped and flinched with the entire audience. The brick stopped with a _clang _on Kixx's palm.

Next, a band of acrobats in variously colored uniforms appeared, boosting each other onto the brick and forming an upside-down pyramid.

Lastly, Kixx reached up with another arm and made the entire structure spin on his finger like a basketball.

Everyone gasped. Felix has a small heart attack. Then the gasps turned into applause as the structure kept spinning steadily.

"You should be stronger," Oscar said.

_"Now," _the Ringmaster declared. _"Please give your warmest welcome to the mysterious, the powerful, the supernatural Houdini!"_

He twirled his cape, hiding from the audience for only a second. When the cape dropped, it was black and sported, along with a top hat and cane, by the mousey, big-eared, white-furred Houdini, who stood in the Ringmaster's place.

"Aloha," Houdini called over the cheering audience, her wide eyes glowing with excitement.

"Volunteer, please!"

A wave of raised hands burst from the audience. Felix ducked down while his cousins stood up. Lilo stood on Angel's shoulders, and Angel stood on Stitch's shoulders. David stood on his seat, waving his arms in the air.

Houdini lit up at the sight of her cousins. After much deliberation, she picked David.

After introducing him to the audience, Houdini took David behind a curtain. She re-emerged, but David was nowhere to be found. A panicked Houdini pulled the curtain down, but there was nothing there.

"Oh, no," Houdini gasped. "Lost volunteer! Oh, what to do, what to do?!" She threw her hat away and covered her eyes.

Felix felt bad for her. He also felt bad for David; he must be scared wherever he was.

While Houdini sulked, her hat stopped in midair, floating. The audience shouted, pleaded for Houdini to turn around. The magician looked up at them, confused, and then looked at the floating hat. She perked up and threw her cape over it.

David reappeared, looking as merry as he did before he vanished, and wearing Houdini's hat.

The audience applauded as the magician and her volunteer bowed. Before David left, Houdini reached behind his ear and pulled out a bouquet of roses.

"You should be more clever," Oscar said.

Houdini hid under her cape, swapping places with the Ringmaster once again.

_"And now, last but far from least; the extraordinary, the enchanting, the ever-expandable Elastico!"_

The spotlights shot upward, and there he was; green, his head like a jester's cap, and holding two bamboo staffs with each end lit on fire.

Felix thought he looked cuter than he did on the posters outside.

The audience roared with excitement as Elastico stepped onto the tightrope. He stepped in time to the chimes of a piano.

_Hey kids! Shake it loose together!_

_The spotlight's hittin' something that's been known to change the weather!_

Elastico's steps became cartwheels and backflips. The tightrope seemed to move to catch his feet.

_We'll kill the fatted calf tonight, so stick around!_

_You're gonna hear electric music, solid walls of sound!_

He threw his burning batons into the air, did five flips, then caught them. Then he performed the same feat again in the other direction, only he finished in a handstand and grabbed the batons with his toes.

_Hey, Candy and Ronnie, have you seen them yet?!_

_Oh, but they're so spaced out!_

_B-B-B-Bennie and the Jets!_

Elastico swung around and around the tightrope, spinning his elongated legs and the fiery batons in hypnotizing orange and green patterns.

_Oh, but they're weird and they're wonderful!_

_Oh, Bennie, she's really keen!_

He leaped into the air, nearly touching the ceiling of the tent. On the way up and down, he danced and twirled, surrounding himself with spinning rings of fire.

_She's got electric boots! A mohair suit!_

_You know I read it in a magazine!_

_Oh, oh, oh!_

Once again, the tightrope caught Elastico as if it were his partner. The way he danced and extended and curled into all manner of extraordinary shapes; it was like he was painting with his body. Felix didn't think he could walk on the ground with even half the grace that Elastico danced on that tightrope.

_B-B-B-Bennie and the Jets!_

The audience clapped and sang along as Elastico kept dancing, his arms and legs stretching and gliding through the air like shooting stars.

_Bennie!_

_Bennie!_

_Bennie!_

_Bennie and the Jets!_

Finally, Elastico dove off the tightrope. Felix had a bigger heart attack. Then the acrobat put his batons in his teeth and touched his toes, catching the air under his expanding torso and floating to the ground like a parachute.

Just as everyone began to applaud, Elastico licked the flames off of each baton as if they were scoops of ice cream. Then he blew a spectacular burst of fire into the air.

Then the applause came.

Elastico giggled as he bowed. Smoke rose from his mouth.

Felix couldn't hear the applause. He couldn't hear the Ringmaster wishing the audience goodnight, he couldn't hear the excited audience shuffling out of their seats, and he couldn't hear his cousins still singing along to _Bennie and the Jets._

His thoughts made him deaf. The image of Elastico was etched into his mind's eye. The skill, the grace, the imagination. It was everything Felix wished he could be.

Felix had often thought about doing things; learning to hula, to fire dance, to play an instrument, but all these desires had been quickly dismissed. But he knew that this one was different. He knew that if he ignored it for even another minute, he would go crazy.

He had to see Elastico again. He was desperate for it, and yet he was terrified.

**III**

As Felix stood outside Elastico's dressing room, he went over the advice his cousins had given him.

_Get him some chocolate, _Nani said. _When in doubt, always get them chocolate._

_Tell him a joke, _David said. _A funny joke. But don't force it. If you see the opportunity, take it, but don't force it._

_Give compliments, _Stitch said. _Great show. Cute nose. You know?_

_Talk about music, _Angel said. _If youga like same music, youga bootifa._

_Just be yourself, _Lilo said.

"Don't be such a wuss," Oscar said.

Felix breathed, his claws tight around the box of chocolates he had picked up from down the street. He knocked on the door.

It felt like forever by the time Elastico answered.

"Aloha," the acrobat chirped. "Meega love visitors. Isa great to see youga." His voice was as bouncy as his dancing.

"Um, aloha, Elastico," Felix said. "Um...Here. For youga." He held out the box.

"Aw. Taka." Elastico took the box and opened it. "Mmm. Smell bootifa. Want one?"

Felix didn't answer. He thought it was a trick question.

"Isa okitaka," Elastico said. "Youga buy so youga get one, too."

He held out the box. There were so many choices; black ones, brown ones, white ones, round ones, square ones, ones with squiggly lines, ones stuck to biscuits.

Felix picked a square white one. He hoped that was the right choice.

Elastico picked a round black one with squiggly lines.

"Idiot," Oscar said.

"Yum," Elastico said. "Good, huh?"

"Mm. Delicious." Felix didn't eat until Elastico had. The chocolate was good, but not enough to calm his nerves.

"Gonna save for Houdini and Kixx and everyone," Elastico added, taking the box into his dressing room.

Felix stayed outside, the very tips of his toe-claws at the edge of the doorway.

_Give compliments._

"Meega like show," he said.

"Really?" Elastico skipped back to the doorway, his face even brighter than before.

"Youga like song? Meega not sure. What youga think?"

"Ih. Song good..."

"Just tell him you like his weird dancing," Oscar said. "Idiot."

_Talk about music._

"Um..._He has sparkly boots," _Felix tried to sing. _"Fluffy suit. Meega read magazine..."_ He stopped. He had a sudden urge to call Jumba to ask for a time machine so he could go back and never do what he just did. Or maybe he'd stop himself from being created. That might be better.

Elastico looked confused. In that moment, it seemed all the friendliness he'd been showing had never happened, and he was just dealing with a crazy fan talking gibberish at him.

"Now he's staring at you," Oscar said. "Well done."

_"Oh!" _The acrobat snapped his fingers. "Naga, naga. Goes like this..." He took Felix's hands.

Felix's face was on fire.

_"She's got electric boots..." _Elastico sang, gently swinging Felix's arms.

The lyrics suddenly came back to Felix. He sang along.

_"A mohair suit. You know I read it in a magazine. Oh, oh, oh. B-B-B-Bennie and the Jets."_

Elastico lifted his arms, letting Felix twirl under them. It was only a little movement, but it was filled with all the grace from the performance.

Felix wanted to do it again. He wanted to be near that incredible grace, but couldn't ask. He simply couldn't.

"Much better," Elastico chirped.

"Now he has to lie to make you feel better," Oscar said.

"Um..." Felix stammered. "Wanna, um..."

"Spit it out already, will you?" Oscar said.

Elastico made that confused look again. On the one hand, he seemed patient, like he would wait all week for Felix to untie his tongue if he had to. On the other hand, he also seemed like he didn't particularly want to.

"W-W-W..." Why was it so difficult? "Wanna go get ice cream?"

That seemed to salvage Elastico's interest.

"Sure," he replied. "Just one sec. Gotta change." He shut the door. It opened seconds later, showing Elastico without his purple ruff or bright red nose.

"Okitaka. Let's go."

"Try not to embarrass yourself again," Oscar said.

**IV**

Dusk brought a purple curtain above the orange sky. Felix thought it was beautiful. He thought about pointing it out to Elastico.

"Don't be stupid," Oscar said.

It was only a short walk to Slushy's Shave Ice stand. However, there were stops every few moments when a passing fan or two or twenty wanted an autograph or photo from Elastico.

He let kids sit on his shoulders and hugged everyone who came up to him. He seemed so happy to see everyone. Felix wished he could be like that; the smiling face which instantly makes any day better. He was also worried; every fan came, had their merry exchange with Elastico, then left. Was he just being a clingy fan?

Finally, they got to Slushy's. They both asked for the cookie dough flavor.

_If youga like same music, youga bootifa. _Maybe it worked the same way with ice cream.

They walked around town for a while. Most of the shops were closed by now. As Felix licked his ice cream cone, he grew anxious for something to do or to talk about. He didn't want to seem dull, but he had no idea what he could possibly have in common with the extraordinary, the enchanting, the ever-expandable Elastico.

Finally, hope came to him in the form of an angel's voice.

_"I get so lonely, baby,_

_"Well, I'm so lonely,_

_"I get so lonely, I could die!"_

At the end of the street was one of Stitch and Angel's pop-up performances. People were dancing all around them, most of them still in their work uniforms.

Felix noticed Elastico humming and tapping his feet. Even that he did with incredible grace.

"Youga like Elvis?" Felix asked.

"Ih. Meega like Elvis and Elton and Dolly and all big singers."

"Hm...Meega, too." Felix wobbled on his own feet. He looked down at them, lumpy things with ugly claws, and at Elastico's, soft clouds which piloted his incredible grace.

"Stop looking at his feet," Oscar said. "Weirdo."

"Gaba?" Elastico asked. He lifted a foot to inspect it, wondering if he'd stepped in something that was distracting Felix.

"Nothing," Felix fibbed.

"Told ya," Oscar said.

Elastico checked his other foot, then looked up at Felix with a puzzled expression that didn't match his face.

"Well, he wouldn't be looking like that if it wasn't for you," Oscar said. "He'd still have that beautiful smile of his if you weren't such a weirdo."

Felix looked down to avoid Elastico's eyes, then looked up to avoid looking at his feet again, then down, then up. Finally, he just met in the middle and looked at his nose.

Elastico seemed to be studying him.

"He's trying to figure out the best way to tell you to get lost," Oscar said.

Elastico lit up. "Know just what youga need," he said. He gobbled down what remained of his ice cream cone and scurried away.

Felix almost thought he'd scared Elastico off until he saw he was only going to Angel and Stitch. They greeted him with a hug, then he whispered something in their ears. They nodded, and Elastico skipped back to Felix.

Felix glanced at Stitch and Angel. They winked at him.

"Wanna dance with meega?" Elastico offered him his hands.

Felix was faced with a dilemma. He had never danced ever, let alone in front of people, or even with such a talented performer. He knew he would mess up; he would fall on his face or stomp on Elastico's toes or worse.

On the other hand, he looked into that beautiful smile, waiting as long as it had to for him to decide. Only a monster would say no to that smile.

"Nice knowing you," Oscar said.

After gobbling up the rest of his ice cream, Felix found himself in the heart of the crowd. Elastico held his hands.

"Gonna try and not step on toes," Felix said.

Stitch and Angel readied their instruments.

"Meega, too," Elastico giggled.

_My, my! At Waterloo, Napoleon did surrender!_

The moment they started moving, Felix was terrified that he'd be pulled into one of Elastico's spectacular movements and fall over like the clutz he was.

_Oh yeah! And I have met my destiny in quite a similar way!_

But Elastico only spun around with him, swinging his legs gently between them. Felix imitated him but kept glancing around, wondering how many people were staring at him.

_The history book on the shelf,_

_Is always repeating itself!_

Everyone was enjoying their own dances. Even Stitch and Angel were lost in each other's eyes as they performed. Felix let out a sigh of relief; it really was just him and Elastico.

_Waterloo! I was defeated, you won the war!_

After a few spins, Elastico did the twirling movement again. Then he let Felix do it to him.

To Felix, it was better than being near his incredible grace. It was as if he had been lent some of it. Only a little bit; he didn't think he could walk a tightrope or do a flip, but it made him feel better than he had ever felt.

_Waterloo! Promise to love you forevermore!_

Elastico dipped backward. Felix's heart rocketed into his throat; he just knew that he was going to drop him. The acrobat came within an inch of the ground, but despite the sweatiness of Felix's palms, he didn't let him fall. Elastico stretched his arm out like an arrow, then smiled up at Felix, assuring him that he felt safe in his arms.

Felix was determined to prove him right.

_Waterloo! Couldn't escape if I wanted to!_

If Oscar wanted him to stop, he had his chance.

As Elastico straightened up, Felix ducked down and hugged him around the legs. He raised the acrobat to the sky and spun around.

Elastico's laughter was as delightful as it had been during the show. Felix's heart dropped back into his chest and performed a rambunctious drum solo on his ribs.

_Waterloo! Knowing my fate is to be with you!_

He was never scared of dropping Elastico. There was only the exhilaration of dancing with him.

_Waterloo! Finally facing my Waterloo!_

The song ended. The surrounding dancing became applause for Angel and Stitch. As Felix set Elastico down, he was pulled into a hug.

"That was fun," the acrobat cheered. "Youga have fun, Felix?"

"Ih," Felix said, not realizing that he was out of breath, sweating, and still holding Elastico.

"Lots."

"Wanna do another fun thing? Youga pick this time."

Felix's mind raced with possibilities. He could show Elastico his special window-cleaning method, or how he organizes his broom closet, or his soap collection.

"Idiot," Oscar said.

"Naga know..." Felix muttered.

Elastico made that mismatched look again.

"You've done it again," Oscar said. "Stop ruining him."

"Isa okitaka, Felix," Elastico said with only a small version of his beautiful smile. "Anything youga want...Even watching paint dry."

That smile. Felix wondered if they taught you how to smile like that in circus training or if you had to be born with it. Regardless, he had just thought of the perfect thing for them to do.

And how could he ever say no to that smile?

**V**

Felix wasn't an acrobat. He couldn't stretch or dance or twirl burning batons or do anything even remotely as incredible as Elastico could do. The thing he was best at, apart from cleaning, was enjoying simple things. To Felix, there was nothing simpler or more enjoyable than lying on the beach and looking at the stars.

Elastico seemed to enjoy it, too. Felix, however, didn't look at the sky. He couldn't take his eyes of Elastico. Even a solar flare wouldn't pry him away.

"Wanna do circus with naga tent," Elastico said. "Have show with bootifa stars. What youga think?" He looked at Felix, who tried to look as if he'd been looking at the sky the whole time.

"Meega see that," Felix replied.

"Big handstand towers, magic shows, fire dances, and sky. Imagine..."

Felix loved Elastico's talent, his kindness, his imagination. He loved...

He faced the sky, but as much as he loved looking at the stars, he simply couldn't see them tonight. He had just realized how close his left hand was to Elastico's right.

He had danced with him already. How hard could holding his hand be?

Felix reached. The tip of his claw tapped Elastico's finger.

"Don't get too excited," Oscar said. "He's a dancer; he's probably danced with hundreds of people. What you did back there was nothing special."

He pulled his hand away.

"Felix?"

He looked at Elastico. That smile.

"Isa okitaka." The acrobat held up his hand.

Felix waited for Oscar to say something. He didn't. All he had was Elastico's smile.

He took his hand. Felix knew that his talent and imagination was nothing like Elastico's, but lying there, holding his hand, enjoying his beautiful smile, he realized that it didn't matter. Elastico saw something just as beautiful in him. He didn't know what it was, but simply knowing that Elastico could see it had tears brewing in his eyes.

Elastico rested his other hand on Felix's belly.

"Huh?"

_"Cootchie-cootchie-coo!"_

Felix didn't think Elastico knew what he was getting into; he was _dangerously _ticklish. But no matter how roaring his laughter became, Elastico kept going. He wasn't rough; his rubbery fingers were gentle as they glided across Felix's ribs.

At the very least, it gave Felix a chance to cry.

**VI**

Throughout the tickle attack, and during the walk back to the circus tent, Felix didn't let go of Elastico's hand. Or Elastico didn't let go of Felix's hand. It was difficult to tell.

Elastico liked him. He wasn't at all like a typical fan. Most fans, wonderful and friendly as they were, wanted to take things from him. Photos, autographs, quick recreations of stunts from his shows. He loved them, he really did, but sometimes they made him feel like a vending machine.

Then Felix comes along, giving him chocolates and a wonderful night out dancing and looking at the stars. He'd never received so much all at once; he wondered how he was going to repay it all.

He could still feel the rush of being spun around during the dance. His stomach was still fluttering and ABBA's _Waterloo _was still in his ears. It had been wonderfully spontaneous, and Elastico loved spontaneity.

But it seemed like something was holding him back. Like he didn't feel like he was allowed to be spontaneous, or like he couldn't be spontaneous properly, if there was such a thing.

Elastico knew that there was someone fun hiding in that fluffy green ball of awkwardness. He knew he had to let him out, but more importantly, he really, really, _really _wanted to.

"Taka, Felix." Elastico hugged him. "Have fun?"

"Ih. Youga?"

"Lots...See youga again?"

There was a pause. Elastico wanted desperately to invite him to the show tomorrow, and he knew that Felix wanted to come just as badly. But the acrobat knew that, if that fun person was ever going to come out, they had to do some things by themselves.

"Meega come to show tomorrow," Felix said.

"Can't wait...Goodnight, Felix."

"Goodnight, Elastico."

Elastico suddenly remembered his first days at the circus. He remembered how terrified he'd been just before his first show. He remembered what the Ringmaster had told him then.

"Felix?"

"Ih?"

"You can be as amazing as you want."

That got a smile out of the shy guy. He really had a beautiful smile.

Elastico returned to his tent, keeping hold of Felix's hand until his arm's length ran out. Considering his stretchiness, that took a while. He returned to his dressing room with a skip in his step.

"Fun night, Ellie?" Kixx asked, peeking out of his room.

"Get any kisses?" Houdini asked, peeking out of hers.

"Ih. Lots of fun," Elastico told them. "Naga kisses yet, but soon."

With that, he retired to his room and curled up in his bed.

He dreamed of Felix and the fun person still making their way out.

**VII**

Felix's trunk snaked through the flowers, sniffing each one. He had purchased a bouquet of all different colors; they were like fireworks you could hold in your hand. He thought Elastico would like that.

He felt much lighter than he usually did. His feet didn't so much walk as bounce off the sidewalk.

"Waterloo..." He hummed. "Doo-dah-dee-dah-dah-doo Waterloo."

There was already a crowd of people shuffling into the circus tent. A few of them were carrying big, bulky cameras and microphones. Felix went around them, finding the long stretch of pop-up walls where the dressing rooms were.

His heart had been quivering when he was here yesterday. It did so again now, but this time it felt good. In fact, it just might have become Felix's favorite feeling.

He was mere steps away from Elastico's dressing room when he heard music coming from it. He didn't have to listen long to know that it wasn't a rehearsal.

_Akoota-_

Felix slapped his hands over his ears. _"Meega do anything for love," _he sang as loud as he could, drowning out Angel's song.

_"But naga that!"_

The dressing room door swung open. Elastico stepped out, followed by Houdini and Kixx. They didn't seem as jovial as they had during their performance yesterday. Now they appeared rigid and stern, like soldiers.

Felix dove behind some nearby boxes of peanuts, waiting until the performers had marched by.

"Great job," Oscar said. "If you hadn't taken so long to pick out those flowers, you could've been here in time to stop all this."

Felix crept out from his hiding place, watching the three performers make their way to the rear entrance of the tent. Felix noticed something in Elastico's hand; a tape recorder.

"What's that?" Somebody asked.

Felix spun around, nearly coughing up his heart. 627 was standing outside Elastico's dressing room.

"What's that?" 627 asked again, nodding at the colorful flowers.

Felix took a step back, ready to dodge an incoming attack, but 627 didn't move. He just stood there, waiting patiently for an answer.

"Um...Flowers," Felix said.

627 raised an eyebrow. "What are they for?"

"...For Elastico."

"Why would you want to give those to him?"

"B-Because..." Felix stammered.

"Just say it, you wuss," Oscar said.

"Because...Elastico boojiboo."

627 looked confused; as if Felix had answered him only with unintelligible noises.

Felix clutched the bouquet tighter, trying to look as imposing as 627. It was a challenge; the crimson Experiment wasn't as big as Kixx, but even from a distance, Felix felt like he was being looked down upon.

"W-Where friends?" He demanded.

"621's taking care of 021," 627 answered. "She was badly injured fighting your friend, 221, the night of the power outage. I'm doing this one alone."

Felix narrowed his eyes at him, hoping that might be scary enough to coax out a little more information.

"If they were here, they'd be with me," 627 continued. "Not much point in only _some _of us hiding, is there?"

Felix put his fists up. He didn't think he looked very threatening, clenching the bouquet of flowers, but he didn't dare put them down.

"No need to fight. In just a moment, you'll see things the way we want you to. You all will..." 627 turned and walked away. He looked over his shoulder.

"Thanks for answering my questions."

Felix remembered that Elastico had the recording of Angel's song, but couldn't understand how him going around town and hypnotizing cousins would work out any better than when 627, 621, and 021 had tried it before.

Then he remembered the cameras and microphones he'd seen outside.

Felix sprinted towards the tent's rear entrance. He never ran this fast; not even to get to a drink spill on the other side of the hula school.

He swung open the curtain. It was dark except for the spotlights on the Ringmaster.

_"Now, leading today's show, the extraordinary, the enchanting, the ever-expandable Elastico!"_

The lights shot up to Elastico, bracing himself for a dive from a platform as high as the tent. He still held the tape recorder. He was smiling, but it wasn't the smile he had yesterday. This one was like a mask; it seemed phony.

In the shadows of the crowd, Felix could make out the outlines of the cameras and microphones scattered throughout.

Elastico dove, his arms spread out like the wings of a bird.

_First, when there's nothing,_

_But a slow-glowing dream._

When he was only a few feet away from the ground, his arms shot up and caught the platform, slingshotting him back up.

He was just as graceful hypnotized, but it did not entrance Felix the way it had yesterday. Where before there had been a burning love for the performance and for the audience, now Felix knew that the acrobat was only giving the cousins watching at home a little more time to get settled. After he all, he couldn't let anyone miss the real showstopper, could he?

_That your fear seems to hide,_

_Deep inside your mind._

Felix ran, hoping to catch Elastico on his next trip down. He had barely taken two steps when he was struck across the face and sent to the ground.

He kept hold of the flowers.

_All alone, I have cried,_

_Silent tears full of pride._

Felix looked up at his attacker but found nothing. It was dark, but he should've been able to see an outline.

He heard somebody snicker.

"Houdini-" He went to get up, but was grabbed by the ears and thrown into a big, meaty hand. It was big enough to encase his entire body.

_In a world made of steel,_

_Made of stone._

"Guys," Felix gasped. "Cousins! Fight it! Remember who youga-" He was silenced with a massive thumb over his mouth.

Houdini blinked into visibility, holding a finger over her lips. Her wide eyes were much darker than they had been during her magic show.

_Well, I hear the music,_

_Close my eyes, feel the rhythm._

Felix hoped the flowers weren't too crushed.

He wondered what he could possibly do to escape the mighty, the gigantic, the unstoppable Kixx. He felt like he was one slight squeeze away from becoming a Felix-ball. The only free thing was his trunk.

Then he remembered his trunk-laser. He often forgot about it as it wasn't much use for cleaning; Jumba had told him that it was only a self-defense mechanism.

Well, if there was ever a time to use it...

_Wrap around, take a hold of my heart._

Felix curled his trunk around and fired at Kixx's knuckles.

_"Ow!" _Kixx exclaimed, opening his hand and sucking his burned fingers.

"Trog! C'mere!"

Felix ran again for Elastico, who was now swinging around the tent on an elongated arm.

He was just wondering where Houdini was when he tripped and landed on his face.

He kept hold of the flowers.

"Silly Felix," Houdini giggled. "You naga stop us. You just cleaner."

Felix was dragged away. He looked back and saw his foot hovering in the air, pulling the rest of him back into the darkness.

"She's right, you know," Oscar said.

"Shut up, Oscar." With more force than he would ever show an enemy, let alone a cousin, Felix wretched his foot free and broke into a sprint.

He didn't see Houdini fall, but he did see Kixx stomping after him. Felix picked up his pace, covering with four steps the distance Kixx's humongous form could cover with one.

Darkness became blinding light as he ran into the spotlight. He could see Elastico coming around for another lap.

Felix knew he couldn't walk a tightrope, twirl a burning baton, or even dance that well, but he hoped, prayed that he had just enough of Elastico's grace in him to do this.

Kixx was almost right behind him.

Felix leaped into the air and caught Elastico's ankle. He felt the tip of Kixx's meaty finger scrape against his toe-claws.

Even knowing what was at stake, Felix couldn't help but laugh at this little victory. His laughter came just in time for the music to swell.

_What a feeling! Is believing!_

He looked up; his little victory was spoiled by seeing, in place of that beautiful smile, a piercing glare.

Felix remembered sleeping over at Lilo's house months ago. They had watched a horror movie about an evil clown. Felix mostly remembered the back of Lilo's couch, but he did remember the evil clown's horrible glare. That's what Elastico looked like now.

It terrified Felix even more than the movie had. But he looked at the flowers in his other hand, remembering what was supposed to be on the acrobat's face, and he didn't feel so scared.

Only a little.

_I can have it all,_

_Now I'm dancing for my life!_

The audience applauded as Elastico kept swinging, his pace totally uninterrupted by the dangling Felix.

Felix heard a growl. Elastico let go, backflipping in midair. As flashes of plummeting to the ground filled Felix's racing mind, his claws loosened on Elastico's ankle. As the flip neared its end, Felix banished any thoughts of falling from his mind and tightened his hold.

_Take your passion,_

_And make it happen!_

Felix found themselves descending towards another high platform. A certain crimson-furred Experiment was waiting for them. He reached out to catch them with claws surging with plasma.

_Pictures come alive,_

_You can dance right through your life!_

_"Eep!" _Felix managed to twist out of the way of 627's claws but had to let go of Elastico to do so. Felix stumbled onto the platform, Elastico swung away, and 627 reached out with another plasma-charged hand.

_Now I hear the music,_

_Close my eyes, I am rhythm._

Felix ducked, sidestepped, and then simply scurried around the metal pillar in the platform's center. Plasma and claws flew past his head, scratched at his fleeing heels, and once even came within a fly's wing's distance of his trunk.

He clutched the flowers.

The claws frightened Felix, but after a while, they just annoyed him. He didn't think about how much the plasma or the claws would hurt; he just threw a punch.

_In a flash, it takes hold of my heart._

Felix knew there was a terrible pain in his fist, but he didn't really feel it. All he knew was that the plasma had stopped and that 627 was clutching his nose.

Then the plasma was back.

_What a feeling! Is believing!_

Felix ducked and threw another punch, getting 627's gut. His fist was on fire, but he didn't care. He threw another one. 627 caught it and shoved him to the floor. He was suddenly painfully aware of how much his hand hurt.

_I can have it all,_

_Now I'm dancing for my life!_

627 towered over Felix, reaching for him with claws wreathed in green flame. He seemed as colossal as Kixx.

Felix could already feel the burning plasma. He had never been hit with plasma before, but he could imagine what it felt like.

He thought of Elastico's smile.

He brought his leg up, kicking 627 square in the nose.

_Take your passion,_

_And make it happen!_

Felix scurried to his feet, raising his fists as 627 composed himself.

He clutched the flowers.

627 stood up straight, his glare softening to a look of mellow curiosity from his previous conversation with Felix.

"It really matters that much to you?" He nodded at the flowers.

Felix looked at them. He kept his fists clenched just in case this was a trick.

"Ih," he said. He waited for 627 to lash out again. He didn't.

"Okay..." 627 gestured towards Elastico, who landed in the center of a tightrope connecting the two high platforms.

"Show me."

Felix turned to the tightrope. He glanced back at 627, making extra sure that there was no incoming surprise attack.

627 sat down against the pillar. He was a member of the audience now. From the intense look in his black eyes, he was an extremely judgmental member.

Felix would show him.

He approached the tightrope. He'd never done anything like this before, but he'd already done a lot of new things today.

He placed one foot on the rope.

_Pictures come alive,_

_You can dance right through your life!_

He fell.

_"Eek!"_

He managed to catch the rope just in time.

The audience gave him a collective _"Woah!"_

He dangled there for a moment, wondering how he was going to get out of this one.

He clutched the flowers.

He looked ahead at Elastico, who was bowing to an applauding audience. He held up the tape recorder.

_What a feeling! Is believing!_

Felix swung his legs up around the rope, climbing along its underside. He never knew he could climb so fast.

He carried on until he was within arm's reach of Elastico's ankle, and then pulled him off-balance. He felt terrible, making him fall in front of a whole audience, but he found that the acrobat even stumbled gracefully. Felix found both himself and Elastico dangling from their legs.

Elastico hit the play button. That horrible glare was still there.

_Pictures come alive,_

_You can dance right through your life!_

_Akoota chi-meeto..._

Felix's mind went berserk; he was past the last second. Trillions of possibilities rocketed through his brain.

Finally, he ignored them all. He threw the flowers into the air. Then, with one hand, he reached for the tape recorder. With the other hand, he grabbed Elastico and pulled him into a kiss.

_What a feeling!_

Felix's claws fumbled until they found the rewind button.

_Oteem-ich atooka..._

His eyes were shut. He refused to see the horrible glare that had just been in front of him, keeping Elastico's beautiful smile firmly in his mind.

He didn't think about what the audience thought, or about how he was dangling precariously high above the ground. He only thought about that beautiful smile.

He curled his hand around the tape recorder to hold Elastico's hand. He felt Elastico squeezing back. Between their hands, the tape recorder was crushed.

Finally, Felix pulled away. Only then did he realize that he and Elastico were falling.

He was surprised, but he wasn't scared.

He and Elastico landed safely in a pair of muscular arms. Kixx held them up to the applauding audience as Houdini appeared on his head with a wave of her cape. Lastly, the colorful bouquet of flowers landed in Elastico's hands. The acrobat lit up as he took in their delightful scent.

Felix looked up at the platform. 627 was gone. Then he became aware of the thunderous applause, the Ringmaster's compliments on Elastico's 'surprise guest star,' and Oscar's total silence. But, above it all...

"Felix?"

Felix turned back to Elastico. That beautiful smile was back; it elated Felix even more than any amount of applause.

They kissed again. The audience roared.

_Take your passion,_

_And make it happen!_


	6. Episode 5: Imagine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Space Captain Lilo and her crew are captured by their rival, Captain Gantu, it's up to Lieutenant Victoria to save the day.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Here Comes the Sun" - The Beatles  
*"Human Nature" - Michael Jackson  
*"Space Oddity" - David Bowie  
*"Imagine" - John Lennon

**Episode 5: ** _ **Imagine** _

**I**

_"WHO DARES ENTER MY DOMAIN?!"_

The colossal sea beast burst out of the water, sprinkling rain on Space Captain Lilo's crew. The golden sand around them darkened to a sopping grey.

The god-like creature terrified Lieutenant Victoria, although she had visited him many times already. He hadn't done anything to hurt them yet, but when you were speaking with someone who could control the weather, there was extra pressure to be polite.

Sergeant Stitch and Admiral Angel looked a little scared, which Lieutenant Victoria thought was strange. She knew they could do millions of impossible things, like lift a million-ton battleship, catch a laser beam hotter than the sun, and play the insane drum solo in Queen's _Keep Yourself Alive. _She would've thought that all that would also cover facing giant weather-controlling fish, but she supposed that super-powerful alien Experiments had to be scared by _something._

Private Snooty whimpered from his perch on Lieutenant Victoria's shoulder. She stroked the space from behind his left ear to behind his right; that was his favorite spot. His whimpering calmed into a purr.

Captain Lilo didn't seem scared. Lieutenant Victoria wasn't sure she _could _be scared.

"O, Pudge the Mighty, the Magnificent, the All-Knowing and All-Powerful," Captain Lilo announced. "We come with offerings! And to apologize for not visiting you the other day!"

_"Indeed," _Pudge boomed. _"It is because of your forgetfulness that I allowed that rainstorm to come."_

"And I promise that it was a lesson well-learned," Captain Lilo responded. "That's why we've brought twice as much offering as usual."

She gestured to Lieutenant Victoria, who handed her the containment pod under her arm. Captain Lilo pressed her thumb to the pod's screen, and it whirred open. She took out the two bricks of PBJ energy within (careful not to touch the center, of course.) and threw them into Pudge's abyssal jaws.

_"Mmmm. Thank you, Captain. Even with my immense powers, PBJ energy is a delicacy that is difficult to acquire. I shall forgive you this time. What sort of weather do you desire?"_

"Well, to show you how _truly _sorry we are, we're going to make our request entertaining. Admiral Angel? Sergeant Stitch?" She turned to their alien partners.

The Admiral and the Sergeant exhaled and wiped sweat from their furry brows. Angel flexed her fingers on the neck of her _Ultra-Hyper-Mega Music-o-Matic 9001.5 _(patent pending). Then they started playing.

_"Here comes the sun, doo-dah doo-dah,_

_"Here comes the sun, and I say,_

_"It's all right._

_"Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter._

_"Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here._

_"Here comes the sun, doo-dah doo-dah,_

_"Here comes the sun, and I say,_

_"It's all right."_

Some songs, Lieutenant Victoria thought, could make any situation better, even one involving a weather-controlling sea monster.

Pudge swayed to the music, making waves that would surely excite the local surfers.

_"Ah, yes," _his booming voice softened as much as it could. _"_Abbey Road _is one of my favorites. Thank you for such a lively performance. Next time, if you play something from _Sergeant Pepper, _I'll see about treating you to a snow day."_

"As you wish, O Pudge." Captain Lilo dropped to one knee, and her crew followed suit.

The mighty Pudge descended back to the depths.

Sometimes the crew's adventures could be scary, but Lieutenant Victoria found that they could be just as much fun. There might be giant monsters, but there was also going for ice cream on Slushy's ice planet, or discussing whether Pudge would enjoy _When I'm Sixty-Four _or _Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds _more.

Even when it got scary, Lieutenant Victoria couldn't imagine not being a part of the crew.

"I've got you now, abominations!"

Now there was a voice Lieutenant Victoria didn't much care for

Sure enough, before they could even enter their spaceship, a familiar fish-faced giant stomped out of the bushes, blaster in hand. Before anyone could say, _not you again, stupidhead, _Gantu had trapped Captain Lilo in a glass containment pod.

She didn't even flinch.

"You guys know what to do!" She told her crew.

Victoria did.

"Snooty, keep him distracted," she commanded.

Her batty companion gave an affirmative squeak. He flew up into Gantu's face, digging his fangs into his nostrils.

As Private Snooty slurped and Gantu shouted, Sergeant Stitch and Admiral Angel exchanged a quick battle plan. Lieutenant Victoria was still learning Tantalog, but she made out the words "bowling" and "headbutt."

Sergeant Stitch rolled into his ball form, allowing Admiral Angel to pitch him into Gantu's gut. The giant shark bent over, clutching his stomach as Private Snooty fluttered above him, licking his fangs.

Captain Lilo shielded her face while Admiral Angel went to smash the glass prison to pieces with her forehead.

_BONG!_

The container shook; there wasn't so much as a crack on it.

"Ouch," Admiral Angel rubbed her head. "Huh. Headbutt should've worked..."

"Oh, no," Lilo said, pressing her palms against the glass as if only now realizing it was trapping her.

"I think Gantu's _finally _started to learn."

Private Snooty picked up Sergeant Stitch by the shoulders with his feet, carrying him high enough to sock Gantu on the nose. The shark fell on his back, making the ground quake.

"Come on, stupidhead," Sergeant Stitch declared. He dropped down from Private Snooty, landing on his feet with a casual hop.

"Youga never win."

Gantu spun around, firing his blaster at Sergeant Stitch, who caught the projectile; it was a grey disc.

"That's funny," Gantu said. "I was thinking the same thing not too long ago. But then I realized; when it comes to beating you, you little trog, I only have to be successful once."

The disc split apart in Sergeant Stitch's hand, turning into miniature metal snakes. They slithered around Stitch's body, snaring his wrists and ankles. His limbs were pulled together, leaving him bunched up on the ground like a sack of flour.

"Gaba?!" Sergeant Stitch exclaimed, straining but failing to pull his hands and feet apart.

Private Snooty and Admiral Angel ran to Stitch's rescue. Gantu fired at both of them, getting Snooty in the wing but missing Angel.

She blew a raspberry at Gantu, but the disc opened on the ground behind her, and the metal snakes slithered up her feet.

"Aw, come on," she exclaimed as she and Private Snooty found themselves in the same unflattering position as Sergeant Stitch.

"Impressed, Earth girl?" Gantu asked, answering Captain Lilo's cold glare with an infuriatingly smug grin.

"It's been a while. I was worried you'd forgotten about me. But I didn't forget you; I just needed time to come up with a new plan."

"And to get Hamsterviel to stop yelling at you?" Captain Lilo smirked, but Lieutenant Victoria could see sweat on her face.

Gantu clenched his fist. "Yes...But mainly to develop this new tech. I had it commissioned by one of the finest and most expensive gadget-smiths in the galaxy. It was quite simple, really; the only reason I keep losing Experiments is because of _you, _so if you were out of the way, then I could round up abominations in peace. All I had to was get rid of 626 and 624. 277 there is just a bonus. Their strength is 3000 times their weight, so I only had to get restraints and containers stronger than that. I went for 3002 times to be extra safe."

He leaned down to pick up Captain Lilo's container and the three restrained Experiments.

Lieutenant Victoria got one last glimpse at her Captain's face before she got taken away. Her brown eyes were intense, echoing her stolid command from earlier; _you know what to do. _There was also, to Victoria's surprise, fear.

But Victoria didn't know what to do.

"Don't worry; the rest of your 'ohana' is already waiting for you." Saying the word seemed to hurt Gantu.

"Now it's just a matter of getting back to my ship. Then we can see about getting a new recording of your song, 624."

"Great," Angel said. "Elton bootifa."

Gantu looked down at Victoria. His black eyes were even more petrifying than Pudge's, probably because they were real.

"Have a nice day." With that, the giant shark stomped off.

Victoria didn't see where he went. She was too busy trying to find her spaceship; all she could see were four bicycles. She ran back to the water, hoping to implore Pudge's help, but all she saw was a tiny orange fish munching on a peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich. She looked up at the swirling galaxies, shooting stars, and planets of every shape and color, but there were only clouds.

She sniffed. She went to offer some to Snooty, and then she remembered.

She was alone and worse; the world was boring again. She'd forgotten how that felt.

_You know what to do._

But she didn't. Lilo would know what to do, but as luck would have it, she was stuck in an unbreakable glass tube on a spaceship somewhere, while Victoria was out here, free and clueless.

She wiped a tear from her cheek. Then she breathed in, breathed out, and thought of where to start, just like Dad told her.

Her crew would be on Gantu's ship. She didn't know where it was, but she knew someone who could find it, and she knew she could fly to his planet in her spaceship.

She looked again for it. There it was, right where she'd left it.

**II**

She had hair as brown and spiky as a porcupine and freckles like the sprinkles on a cupcake. Her name's Victoria. She's a good kid, too good for this cold, dark world.

"Finder, ya mind if I borrow this hand fan and these sunglasses?" Clyde calls from the back.

I remind him that 'lost-and-found' don't always mean the same fella, then turn my attention back to the client.

She gets points for complimentin' my fancy fedora, but not for givin' me bad news. Turns out my ol' pals Lilo, Stitch, n' Angel from the Gantu job, not to mention the rest 'a their household and Victoria's best bud, Snooty, have landed in some trouble with the ten-foot fishmonger once again. She says she needs someone to track down his ship.

On our last case, Bonnie, Clyde, n' I were in the woods where ol' fishlips used to be parked. It wasn't there now, but just out of the corner of my nostril, I had only the slightest whiff 'a the ol' place.

With that many sandwiches inside, how could ya miss it?

Couldn't pin it down, but I could tell it was in the air. That'd make it tricky to sniff our way there. But if we could see just where in the air it was, that'd make things easier. Best way to do that was to get to higher ground, and it just so happens that another ol' pal from the Gantu job has the highest ground in town.

"Bonnie! Clyde!" I called out. "Get hats. Time for new case."

I know I've got a lost-and-found to look after, but I can't bear to let that fish-faced jerk get away with what he's done. I can't sit around while my friends are in trouble, and most importantly, I can't ignore a kid who's lost somethin'.

**III**

Few mortals would dare march up the Tower of Light, lest they endure the wrath of the Lightning Dragon. Lieutenant Victoria and the three detectives were among those few.

They would not disturb the Dragon for any trivial matter; they were willing to take the risk for their friends in need.

"Would it kill 'em to put an elevator in here?" Bonnie the Brave exclaimed to the Gods.

'Twas a long trek up a great many steps. Lieutenant Victoria knew that it was only the beginning of her party's journey, but she savored the small victory.

From atop the Tower, one could see to the ends of the Earth. The sky-exposed chamber contained only a bright beacon of light, outshining the sun. From it, the angelic voice of a great prophet sang their musings. The prophet's name was Michael Jackson.

_If they say why, why,  
_

_Tell 'em that it's human nature._

_Why, why, does he do me that way?_

Before that, however, one had to marvel and quake at the golden majesty of the Lightning Dragon. The way his scales, his teeth, and his sky-colored eyes glimmered in the light brought tears to Lieutenant Victoria's eyes.

The Dragon was engaged in a game of wits with a great Snake, as thick and long as the Dragon's neck, but made of water. Its eyes glowed a pale shade of yellow, which chilled the warm midday air.

Between the Dragon and the Snake was the board for their game. Scattered about it were statues of warriors of all shapes and sizes, some standing, some fallen.

"Are they wearing glasses?" The Snake hissed.

"Naga," the Dragon answered.

The Snake slithered about the statues, felling any whose brave faces were doomed by their glasses.

_Too bad Mertle isn't here, _Victoria thought.

The Dragon and the Snake turned their piercing gazes to the four adventurers.

"Aloha, friends," the Dragon chirped.

"Aloha yourself, Sparky." Finder the Fearless tipped his hat. "Spooky."

The Snake bowed its liquid head.

"Wanna play Monopoly?" The Dragon offered.

"Actually," Lieutenant Victoria cleared her throat, ensuring her voice would be as resounding and heroic as her Captain's.

"We're here looking for Gantu's ship."

"Gantu?" The Dragon tilted his magnificent head. "Naga here. No stupidheads allowed."

"Naga here, but..." Finder the Fearless sniffed at the air, following his long snout around the top of the Tower.

"'Scoozie." He hopped over the Dragon's tail.

_"Aha!" _He pointed into the distance. From the ground, the mountains would have hidden it, but from here, the floating black fortress stood out like a patch of night on the daytime sky.

"Whyever would you seek out Gantu?" The Snake inquired. "Has he captured a new cousin?"

"No," Lieutenant Victoria answered. "He's captured Lilo and her whole family. We're going on a rescue mission for them."

"Naga _whole _family." The Dragon stood up. The Tower shook under his mighty feet.

"You mean...You'll help us?" Lieutenant Victoria asked.

"Of course." The Snake slithered about the Dragon's feet before rising to meet Victoria.

He was huge up close; she felt an urge to back away but dared not. Her Captain wouldn't, so neither would she.

"Nobody gets left behind."

Lieutenant Victoria's heart raced; if the one and only Lightning Dragon, not to mention his Snake companion, was on her side, then perhaps there was hope yet for her captured friends.

"Well...It might be a good idea to round up some more troops," she suggested.

She and her companions glanced off the other side of the Tower, where they found their answer in the form of a giant red-and-white tent in the distance.

_Get me out into the nighttime._

_Four walls won't hold me tonight._

**IV**

It was the finest party Lieutenant Victoria could ask for.

Kixx, the burliest and deadliest brawler in the land.

Houdini, a talented mage who could make anything vanish in the blink of an eye.

And Elastico, a graceful bard able to stretch into any shape, even a canoe to aid in the party's travels.

Elastico's love, Felix, accompanied them. They dared not leave each other's side for a moment, even if it meant facing the dangers of Gantu's floating fortress.

The Lightning Dragon guided their flight over the sea. Elastico and the Snake each held onto one of the Dragon's talons. Felix, Houdini, and Kixx rode with Elastico while Victoria and the three detectives rode with Spooky.

"Is the shape I have taken to your comfort, O love of my life?" Elastico asked Felix, whose arms were tight around his elongated form.

"I would and will change anything about this form at your command, for the pain of a thousand needles is a torture I would gladly choose before seeing your beauty betrayed by even a glint of sadness."

"To see you pricked by a thousand needles would be the greatest sadness," Felix responded with a lick of Elastico's cheek, lighting up the bard's face like the sun shining down on them.

"Thine joy is mine, and thou brings me joy regardless of what shape thou taketh. Even the direst moment of my life is softened by being in your arms, my sweet rose."

With each flap of the Dragon's mighty wings, Gantu's floating fortress became ever more gigantic, like jaws opening wide to swallow Lieutenant Victoria and her companions.

Her doubt also grew. She had heard tales of Captain Lilo's past missions into Gantu's fortress, but she had never ventured inside herself, let alone led an adventuring party through its treacherous depths. Rising to the challenge without Captain Lilo would be difficult, and if she failed...

She dared not think of that.

Instead, she considered what Captain Lilo would do. In desperate times, she would sing a ballad precious to her home planet's history, _Aloha Oe. _Lieutenant Victoria, however, could not quite remember the words. She did, however, know another song. It had been her father's favorite.

She decided that would do just as well.

_"Ground Control to Major Tom._

_"Ground Control to Major Tom._

_"Take your protein pills and put your helmet on._

_"Ground Control to Major Tom._

_"Commencing countdown, engines on._

_"Check ignition and may God's love be with you."_

She did not think herself a bard like Admiral Angel or the acrobatic Elastico. Yet, as she sang, the flapping of the Dragon's wings and the rolling waves beneath her became stronger than the approaching fortress.

She felt close to Captain Lilo, Private Snooty, Admiral Angel, Sergeant Stitch, and her father.

_"This is Ground Control to Major Tom._

_"You've really made the grade,_

_"And the papers want to know whose shirts you wear._

_"Now, it's time to leave the capsule if you dare."_

She looked up; the fortress seemed ready to swallow her. The flapping wings and the rolling waves were silent.

Lieutenant Victoria felt cold.

Then she was surrounded by voices.

_"This is Major Tom to Ground Control._

_"I'm stepping through the door,_

_"And I'm floating in a most peculiar way,_

_"And the stars look very different today."_

Lieutenant Victoria looked in the eyes of each member of her party. They were as soft and bright as Captain Lilo's.

She would try her best to be a leader to her comrades, but in the end, she would still be their cousin.

Perhaps that would be enough.

_"For here am I, sitting in a tin can._

_"Far above the world._

_"Planet Earth is blue,_

_"And there's nothing I can do."_

**V**

An ancient rune guarded the fortress' rooftop entrance. It depicted the stern face of some great ruler from days gone by, glaring at Lieutenant Victoria's team as if it were about to lash out at them.

The Lightning Dragon blew a whisp of electricity at the rune. Its stern expression cracked into fear at the Dragon's power, and it crumbled to reveal a stone staircase descending into darkness.

"So far so good," Lieutenant Victoria said. "Next up, Houdini."

The mage bowed, then recited an incantation as she waved her cloak over her companions.

_"Non videri potest nisi per I!"_

Lieutenant Victoria blinked; her cousins were gone. She looked down at her hands but couldn't find them.

"Okay," she said. "One at a time."

She led the way into the darkness. As she ventured further, she found the way ahead dimly lit by torches. They helped show her where to lead her team, but the darkness ahead always taunted her with the possibility of something leaping out.

She knew she was invisible, but what if the thing which leaped out could smell her? Or had infrared vision?

Anything was possible.

_"Ground Control to Major Tom..." _Lieutenant Victoria whispered.

Finally, the darkness answered her with a welcoming voice.

_"I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss."_

It was quickly joined by another much less inviting.

"No, no, _no, _you insufferable trog! I told you to sing _your _song!"

The torches led Lieutenant Victoria to a vast, hexagonal chamber. The orange light burned exceptionally bright here. Gantu stood in the center; everything in the chamber seemed to orbit him.

On the ground, Lieutenant Victoria spotted an orb of glimmering light. Inside it was Captain Lilo, along with Commanders Nani and David from Home Base.

Higher up the black stone walls were Private Snooty, Sergeant Stitch, and Admiral Angel, each pinned to one wall of the hexagonal room by the Gantu's steel snakes. On the rest of the walls, Lieutenant Victoria found three more prisoners; the monstrous 627, the cunning 621, and the brutish 021. The last of them was pale and struggling to keep her eyes open.

_"Well, a few of these verses," _Admiral Angel sang into a staff which Gantu pointed at her.

_"They've got me quite cross."_

"Are you deaf?!" Gantu shouted.

"Hush, hammerhead," a cloaked figure by Gantu's feet said, drawing a toasted sub from his sleeve and inserting it into the darkness of his hood.

"You're messin' up a classic."

"Yeah," Captain Lilo added. "You're ruining the concert for the rest of us!"

_"Well, a few of these verses, they've got me quite cross."_

Gantu rubbed his forehead. "For the last time, I want you to sing _your _song!"

"I am," Angel said innocently.

"Ih. She is," Sergeant Stitch added.

"You can't get mad at her," Commander Nani called out. "She's doing everything you ask!"

"Some people just don't appreciate good music," Commander David scoffed.

Private Snooty nodded. He whistled along with Admiral Angel.

_"But the sun's been quite kind while I wrote this song."_

Gantu's brow furrowed; he looked like he'd been struck over the head with a planet.

"Experiment 272 must've sent me to an alternate reality." He grumbled.

Gantu's cloaked accomplice stood near a statue of the giant shark. It was taller, more muscular, and, somehow, more handsome than the real deal. At the statue's feet were more runes like the one outside.

That was it.

Lieutenant Victoria led the way into the chamber. She couldn't see her companions, but she could feel them. She felt her eyes locking with many others despite only seeing the torch-lit chamber around her.

Another wonder of Houdini's magic.

The runes at the base of the statue had inscriptions on them, a phrase in the twisting, turning Tantalog characters.

Clyde the Courageous whispered the translation to the group. _"To whoever can solve my riddle, I shall bend this place to thy will. On one side, the vilest malformation to ever plague this fair galaxy. On the other, truth, justice, and hope."_

"Aw, man, he changed it," Bonnie the Brave said.

She and Clyde looked at each other. A spark of inspiration flickered between them.

_"Gantu __greater-than _626!" They answered.

The runes shifted like sand under the tide. _"Incorrect. Two attempts remaining."_

_"Gantu __greater-_greater-_than __626!"_

_"Incorrect. One attempt remaining."_

Bonnie and Clyde wiped sweat from their brows. They exchanged uncertain looks, but they hardened into ones of conviction.

_"Gantu __greater-greater-_greater-_than __626!"_

The statue's head bowed as the runes shifted again. _"Correct. The fortress is at your command."_

Bonnie and Clyde high-fived.

"Awesome job, guys," Lieutenant Victoria said. "Okay, next we have to take out Gantu. Kixx, you go in front of him. Bonnie and Clyde, on my signal, release the prisoners, and Houdini, make us visible again."

"You sure you want _all _the prisoners, Vic?" Clyde asked.

Victoria looked up. While Admiral Angel and the rest of the crew were keeping Gantu amusingly distracted, 627, 621, and 021 were silent. 021 seemed barely awake, 621 scowled at the argument going on beneath him, and 627 seemed to be studying it.

Lieutenant Victoria didn't think they would rescue her had the tables been turned. Then she thought of everyone who had helped her today. She thought of the dishonorable thieves who used to be Bonnie and Clyde, the rampaging behemoth who used to be Kixx, and the terrifying monster who used to be Spooky.

She looked up at Sergeant Stitch, Admiral Angel, and especially Private Snooty. She knew they weren't always the amazing friends she knew today. She even remembered wanting to slay Snooty when they first met.

Everyone had to start somewhere. Perhaps 627, 621, and 021 will make their start here.

"Yes," Lieutenant Victoria answered. "Release _everyone."_

Kixx got into position in front of Gantu.

"Take my hand, my love," Elastico said to Felix. "Relish in another of my merry mischiefs, and, if it would please you, bless my ears with the sound of your laughter."

Felix obliged, and Elastico ran to the other side of the chamber, turning his elongated arm into a tripwire just behind Gantu's heels.

_"It's for people like you that keep it turned on."_

_"For the final time!" _Gantu's shouting shook the fortress. "Sing _your song! _The one you use to control other Experiments!"

"Oh, _that _song!" Admiral Angel exclaimed with faux realization.

"Yes, _that _song!"

"Soka. Forgot words."

Gantu blinked. All the blood seemed to rush away from his face. "You. Forgot. The words." He said through his teeth.

Admiral Angel shrugged as best as she could with her arms restrained. _"Excuse me forgetting, but these things I do."_

"Now!" Lieutenant Victoria commanded.

_"Ego iustus volo autem vos scire quis ego sum!"_

In a microsecond, all the prisoners' restraints vanished, and Gantu found a meaty purple fist inches away from his face. He let out a scream at a higher pitch than even Admiral Angel could reach, then tripped backward over Elastico's extended arm.

"Ha," Kixx laughed. "Made ya flinch."

The trapped Experiments landed gracefully on their feet. Even the groggy 021 managed to steady herself on a hand and a knee.

The liberated crew merged into a group hug. Lieutenant Victoria ran to join them, but before she could take a step, a familiar fanged face flapped up to greet her.

"Aloha, Snooty! Oh, I missed you so much!"

Private Snooty took a long slurp from Lieutenant Victoria's nostrils; his way of saying, _I missed you, too._

There were happy reunions all around. The orange light of the chamber began to feel warm. Then Lieutenant Victoria turned and found 021, 621, and 627.

021's eyes were bitingly cold. As she looked into them, Lieutenant Victoria could feel the stone walls around her fading to metal.

"Why?" 627 asked.

Lieutenant Victoria couldn't think of a response at first. She looked to Captain Lilo, who smiled at her.

The metal went back to stone.

"Nobody gets left behind," Victoria answered.

021's cold eyes didn't change.

621 looked like Victoria had just spoken in some obscure language.

627, however, seemed to consider her answer for a moment, then nodded.

"625," Gantu ordered as he got to his feet. "Stop them!"

"No way, Jose," the cloaked accomplice retorted. "I ain't fightin' all these guys by myself. Look at the size 'a the yellow one; she'd eat me up like a steak panini."

"Fine. Like everything else around here, I'll do it myself."

"Go," 627 told Lieutenant Victoria's crew. "We'll hold him off."

"627-" 621 began sternly.

"They outnumber us, 621. And 021 still hasn't fully recovered. We should pick the fight that we can win."

621 sighed. He glared at Lieutenant Victoria's crew. "Fine. We'll call this a truce."

"Thank you," Victoria replied. She began to lead her crew away.

"Just one thing," 627 called after them. "What's that song called?"

The crew exchanged bewildered glances.

_"Your Song," _Admiral Angel answered. "Melody by Elton John, words by Bernie Taupin."

627 pondered as Gantu towered over him, blaster in hand. Finally, he laughed a short laugh before spinning around to disarm the gigantic shark with his scorching eye-lasers.

Lieutenant Victoria led the way out.

"Finder," she called. "Can you find us an escape pod?"

"On it," the detective ran in front of her, his trusty snout guiding the group.

Lieutenant Victoria's mind and heart were racing. Ahead of it all was 627's laugh echoing in her mind. She and Captain Lilo had found the sound in a recording on one of Dr. Jumba's old computers.

The laugh she had heard just now was completely different.

**VI**

That evening, Elastico, Houdini, and Kixx ordered a magnificent feast for the whole crew. The main course was a rare delicacy on Lieutenant Victoria's planet: pizza.

Everything about the celebration was perfect.

Spooky the Snake acted out an amusing recreation of the mission, complete with shapeshifting into an unflattering caricature of Gantu.

The Magnificent Houdini performed some of her most awe-inspiring tricks. By the end of her show, everyone had a beautiful rose which, apparently, had been growing behind their ear.

The Lightning Dragon gave Lieutenant Victoria and Captain Lilo turns flying above the rolling white waves at the edge of the beach.

And, the cherry on top of a wondrous celebration, Admiral Angel played her _Ultra-Hyper-Mega Music-o-Matic 9001.5 _(patent pending).

_"Imagine there's no Heaven._

_"It's easy if you try._

_"No hell below us,_

_"Above us, only sky,_

_"Imagine all the people living for today."_

"Lieutenant?"

"Yes, Captain?" Victoria sat upright as Captain Lilo turned around on the Lightning Dragon's back to face her.

"Because of your bravery today, I'm promoting you to Captain."

Lieutenant Victoria's heart skipped. "Oh, gosh, I...I won't let you down, Captain. I promise."

"I know you won't. And I promise I won't let you down, either."

The two Captains saluted, then they laughed and hugged.

As the sea breeze caressed her hair and Admiral Angel's singing warmed her ears, Captain Victoria thought of her Dad.

She could feel him.

_"You may say I'm a dreamer,_

_"But I'm not the only one._

_"I hope someday you will join us,_

_"And the world will be as one."_


	7. Episode 6: Rock and Roll Dreams Come Through

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The always-silent Belle and Sample are given a unique chance to express their voice.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Don't Go Breakin' My Heart" - Elton John and Kiki Dee  
*"Workin' for the Weekend" - Loverboy  
*"Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)" - Green Day  
*"Don't Look Back in Anger" - Oasis  
*"Rock and Roll Dreams Come Through" - Meat Loaf  
*"True Colors" - Cyndi Lauper  
*"Don't Stop Me Now" - Queen  
*"Crocodile Rock" - Elton John  
*"Wake Me Up Before You Go" - WHAM!  
*"9 to 5" - Dolly Parton  
*"Still Rock and Roll to Me" - Billy Joel  
*"Total Eclipse of the Heart" - Bonnie Tyler  
*"Here I Go Again" - Whitesnake  
*"Sweet Child O' Mine" - Guns N' Roses  
*"Paradise by the Dashboard Light" - Meat Loaf  
*"Always on My Mind" - Elvis Presley  
*"Black or White" - Michael Jackson  
*"Ziggy Stardust" - David Bowie  
*"Hey, Jude" - The Beatles

**Episode 6: ** ** _Rock and Roll Dreams Come Through_ **

**I**

Finally, after a grueling hour-and-a-half of cleaning, the stage looked close to its former glory. The lights would still need replacing, though.

Belle wiped sweat from her tall brow. The work hadn't been too exhausting thanks to her Experimental endurance. However, knowing the mess was her doing, plus having the band's piercing glares on her all the while, made it the most unbearable 90 minutes of her life.

She'd only wanted to sing along. Next time, she wouldn't be so stupid.

It was late. She should head home; Nani would need her wake-up call.

She had barely started down the sidewalk when somebody stepped in front of her. It was the band's beatboxer, Experiment 258, better known by his stage name, Sample.

Belle braced herself for a berating for ruining his show.

"Aloha_,'_" he signed. "You're number 248, right?"

"Yes," she signed back. "I'm called Belle now."

"Cool_. _You like music?"

"Yeah_. _A lot."

"I like your singing," Sample signed with a grin.

Belle glared at him, changing his grin to a look of panic.

"I mean it," he signed urgently. "I wish I could sing like you. All I can do is this_._"

Using his speakerphone ears, he played the opening riff of Michael Jackson's _Beat It. _It was only a quick demonstration, but it was enough to make Belle roll her shoulders, wag her tail, and bounce on her clawed feet.

"But that's cool," she signed. "You can take those beats anywhere you go. People like moving to the music you make. Nobody likes getting knocked over by my super-sonic voice."

"Well_,_" Sample signed. "Once you get past that, I think you're a great singer. If I could speak, I'd want to sound like you."

Belle smiled at him. He was blushing, and she realized that she was, too.

"Was there something you wanted to tell me?'" She tried to look more stern. "Or were you about to ask for my autograph?"

"Now that you mention it, that would be nice." Sample grinned even wider. "But I was just on my way to my usual Wednesday hangout. I was wondering if you'd like to come with me?"

"What about your bandmates?"

Sample waved his hand dismissively. "Just me. But this week, I thought it'd be nice to have some company."

Belle shrugged. "I don't know. I don't want to cause any more damage."

Sample shook his head. "You won't have to worry about that. I promise." He held out his hand.

Belle looked at him. She couldn't shake the feeling that something terrible would happen if she went along, whether that be Sample planning some kind of trick or just her own carelessness. But that grin seemed too sincere to be a trickster's grin. And it wasn't every day that she got asked out by a real musician.

She shrugged and took Sample's hand. Five minutes later, they were outside a small pub. There was a banner over the door; _Tonight: Lip-Sync Karaoke Contest._

Inside, there was a small island of a stage, with two microphone stands on it, in a sea of noisy patrons. Sample signed greetings to everyone he passed, and they signed back as best as they could.

"See to good you, Sample."

"Go easy on us last time."

"Hey_, _Sample, who's your pineapple?"

That last one got a laugh out of Belle. She clasped her claws over her mouth as quickly as possible. She hadn't knocked anything over, but the whole place shook. The patrons let out a collective, _"Woah,"_ and then laughed it off.

Belle was frozen for a moment. The place had stopped shaking, but she could feel a tsunami.

Sample took her hand. He gave her a thumbs-up. After a moment, she returned it, and Sample bumped his thumbs-up into hers.

_"Alright, alright, settle down." _A red-haired woman in a sea-blue t-shirt stepped onto the stage with a microphone. It took a few seconds, but the patrons obeyed her.

_"Okay, most of ya know this, but if it's your first time, I'll just dish out the down-low of our lip-sync contest. If ya wanna, ya can come on up and move ya lips to any song ya like. Ya can dance, handstand, and do anythin' within the realm 'a decency 'cept actually sing. Whoever the rest of ya like most gets a free tab. So, who's goin' first? Hey, why not our reignin' champ, Sample? Get on up here, Sam!"_

Sample darted up on stage with Belle and many thunderous cheers following close behind.

_"Who's your friend, Sam?"_

Sample gestured to Belle, who tried not to blush as she felt all eyes on her. She raised her palm and tapped on it with the side of her opposite index finger.

"That means 'bell,' right?" The hostess whispered away from the mic.

Belle nodded.

_"Okay! Startin' us off tonight; Sample and Belle!" _The hostess leaned down to Sample as the place erupted with applause.

"Whatcha performin' this time, Sam?"

Sample played something from his ears into hers. It was too soft for Belle to hear.

The hostess grinned at Belle and then at Sample. "I see. No better choice, cuz. Have fun."

She hopped off the stage. Sample took both the microphones down from their stands and handed one of them to Belle, who noticed that they weren't switched on.

"You like Elton?'" Sample signed.

"Who doesn't?'" Belle replied. She snapped her claws and swayed her hips just like Elton John did in the video for _I'm Still Standing._

"Then I think you'll like this."

The crowd cheered again as music filled the place. Through the rowdiness, Belle instantly recognized the opening of _Don't Go Breaking My Heart. _Her own heart was racing; she'd never performed on stage before. She'd thought about it, dreamed of it, even, but her thoughts and dreams had never been so intimidating.

And yet, despite her fear, her feet were already under the spell of those heavenly piano notes.

She glanced over the crowd. There was a TV screen displaying the lyrics. Belle ignored it; she wouldn't need it.

_"Don't go breakin' my heart," _Sample mouthed the words, making it seem like he had the same entrancing voice as Elton John.

Belle got the trick instantly.

_"I couldn't if I tried," _Belle sang silently. It was such a relief; to open her mouth and, instead of an ear-shattering wave of destruction, release the perfect, soothing voice of Kiki Dee.

_"Oh, honey, if I get restless."_

_"Baby, you're not the kind."_

There was more to do than just mouth the words. Belle and Sample rocked and swayed around each other the way she'd seen Elton and Kiki doing in the music video.

_"Don't go breakin' my heart."_

_"You take the weight off of me."_

_"Oh, honey, when you knocked on my door." _Sample knocked on an invisible door between him and Belle. He did so with the most saccharine smile Belle had ever seen, but somehow, he still seemed completely sincere.

_"Ooh, I gave you my key." _Belle decided that the invisible door was a set of double-doors. She swung them open with both arms, leaving them free to scoop up Sample and spin him around.

This earned them a roaring applause from the audience. When Belle set Sample down, he had a dazed grin flushed with bright red. She thought he might faint, so she held his hands to keep him steady.

She wasn't going to let her dance partner swoon on her.

_"Ooh-hoo! Nobody knows it!"_ Belle spun Sample around so she was hugging him from behind.

_"When I was down!"_

_"I was your clown!" _Belle spun him again, then dipped into his arms. As Sample caught her, she looked to the audience and pulled her lips into a goofy smile with her fingers. That earned her laughter _and _applause.

_"Ooh-hoo! Nobody knows it!"_

_"Right from the start!"_

_"I gave you my heart,_

_"Oh-ho! I gave you my heart!"_

As the performance continued, Belle forgot her real voice. As long as she and Sample kept "singing," it seemed that she'd always had the voice of Kiki Dee.

_"So don't go breakin' my heart!"_

_"I won't go breakin' your heart!"_

_"Don't go breakin' my heart!"_

There was applause, cheering, and even some demands for an encore.

Belle turned to Sample, about to exclaim how much fun she'd had.

She stopped herself just in time.

"Wanna do another?'" Sample signed.

Belle wiped sweat from her brow, caught her breath, and smiled at him.

"As many as you want."

If he couldn't have a voice and hers was simply too darn loud, why not borrow somebody else's for a while?

**II**

Belle went over the list; jerky, water, mango juice, toothpaste, bread, cheese, sandwich meat. They had almost everything. There was just one thing left; a new CD.

She and Sample always brought all their CDs (all 53 of them) with them on their road trips, but they made a point each time of introducing themselves to a new artist.

At the moment, she was equally enamored with the city street cover of Oasis' _(What's the Story) Morning Glory, _and the masked, suited headshots on the front of Green Day's _Nimrod._

She turned to Sample, who was eyeing some boxes of pastries across the aisle. She tapped on his shoulder and held out both albums. Sample spent a moment studying them, then shrugged, smiled, and pointed at both of them. Then the two of them leaned between the albums to nuzzle each other's noses.

Minutes later, they were on their way home with their groceries. With one arm, they each carried a bag, leaving two arms free to loop around each other.

Belle had a skip in her step. There was a lot to be excited about her and Sample's monthly road trips. Discovering new music, rocking out to their old favorites, and, of course, finding a spot in the middle of nowhere where Belle could sing. Not lip-sync singing, but singing with her real super-sonic voice.

Her mind raced as she considered what she would sing first. She thought a power ballad like Journey's _Don't Stop Believin' _would sound especially epic with her booming voice. Or she might try something softer, like Barry Manilow's _Ships._

Sample licked her cheek. She blew a raspberry into his. He physically couldn't laugh, but he more than made up for it with his infectiously sweet smile.

A familiar sound met their ears, beckoning them off their route home.

_"Everybody's workin' for the weekend!_

_"Everybody wants a lil' romance!_

_"Everybody's goin' off the deep end!_

_"Everybody needs a second chance!"_

That beat. That guitar riff. Those perfectly harmonized voices. How could they resist?

Darting to the next street over, they found one of Stitch and Angel's famous sidewalk performances. They were surrounded by dancing street-goers. Even a nearby hot dog vendor had joined in, revealing his rather impressive skill at moonwalking.

Belle and Sample were already dancing by the time they were near. Their bags did nothing to impede their grace together.

_"You want a piece of my heart?_

_"You better start from the start!"_

After they'd taken turns dipping each other, they found Stitch and Angel were dancing around them as they played their guitars. It seemed that they'd become the center of the performance.

Belle had that extra heartbeat that always came at the start of a show. But she and Sample had won enough lip-sync contests to not be intimidated by a little sidewalk performance.

_"You wanna be in the show?_

_"Come on, baby, let's go!"_

Sample borrowed Angel's voice and Belle borrowed Stitch's voice.

They liked to swap the genders of their voice-donors from time-to-time. Belle had borrowed both Stitch and Angel's voices before; she couldn't decide which one suited her more.

Angel and Stitch finished with a guitar solo. Belle and Sample finished with one of their signature dance moves; Belle twirled Sample around, pulled him close, kissed him on the cheek, and then he made a show of swooning in her arms.

The crowd loved it.

"Bootifa, cousins," Stitch cheered, applauding the crowd as they applauded him.

"Same time tomorrow," Angel added, applauding as well. "Naga start without us."

People surrounded Stitch and Angel, taking pictures with them, requesting songs, and many even asking if they'd ever do a full concert.

It took a few minutes, but people soon went back to their daily routines, but they did so with smiles on their faces and skips in their steps.

Belle thought it was beautiful.

The four Experiments exchanged hugs and alohas.

"That was so amazing," Belle signed. "The energy and the guitars and your voices, just..." Her signs devolved into excited claw-wiggling.

"And your new hair! It's awesome!"

Angel stroked the stripe of pink fur shrouding her left eye. "Thanks_," _she signed. "I thought it would make me look like Ziggy Stardust."

Belle and Sample weren't deaf, and they wouldn't think less of Angel or Stitch for speaking to them in English or Tantalog. But it felt nice to feel a little less alone in their unique method of communication.

"I can totally see it."

"You and Sample were awesome, too."

Belle held her cheeks, trying to hide her blush. It didn't matter how many shows she put on with Sample; she would never be completely used to compliments, least of all from actual musicians like Angel.

She thought it might help to change the subject.

"Is Nani still waking up on time without her old alarm clock?"

"Oh, yeah_. _Nothing a little Aerosmith can't solve."

"Awesome_. _Bet she loves that."

"You have no idea.'"

Belle grinned. "Are you and Stitch still good to look after our cats while we're gone?"

"Yep. We'll take good care of Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John. Oh, that reminds me." Angel tapped Stitch on the shoulder, drawing him from the laugh he and Sample were sharing over a joke he'd just signed.

"Do you still have that communicator?" She signed.

"Why are you talking to me in sign language, boojiboo?" Stitch signed back.

There was silence as Angel and Stitch stared at each other. Belle (for the sake of the whole block) held in her giggles.

"Right here." One of Stitch's hidden arms emerged with a small red device with a circular screen. When Angel reached for it, he pulled it away and jammed his tongue into her nostril.

"Hey, boojiboo," Angel giggled. "Meega saving that booger!"

Stitch tossed the device to Belle, who caught it.

"Jumba's old communicator,'" he signed as he pulled his tongue from Angel's nose and smacked his lips.

"We have the other one, just in case you need us or we need you."

Belle gave him a thumbs-up.

Stitch and Angel wished their cousins a fun and safe trip and then went on their way. Sample and Belle went on their way, too, but first, Sample reached into his bag and got out their Walkman and headphones.

It was a ten-minute walk home; more than enough time to rock out to Guns N' Roses' _November Rain._

**III**

_It's something unpredictable, but in the end, it's right._

_I hope you had the time of your life._

Belle and Sample certainly did.

It was her turn to drive. She loved their old jeep. She loved the roof that could open up, the huge tires that could handle the dirt road, and the custom pedals that reached her and Sample's short legs.

But most of all, she loved the CD player. There was something about driving down an empty freeway with the windows down, the wind in your fur, and somebody you loved beside you. It made any already-amazing song even more amazing, and there was no better way to be introduced to a new artist. It was second only to seeing a live performance.

Belle thought that if there were ever a way to watch a live performance while driving down an empty freeway with the windows down, then she would die of happiness. Especially if it was Queen playing _Don't Stop Me Now._

By the time Belle and Sample had found the perfect spot to camp, they had been fully converted into Oasis and Green Day fans. Belle was almost disappointed; she desperately wanted to listen to _Don't Look Back in Anger _again.

She perked up, however, as she looked around. Nothing but vast, golden, earthy landscapes in any direction. They had only the occasional boulder or cluster of plant life for company.

It was perfect.

Belle's mind raced. She had no idea what to sing first. She wanted to sing every song she knew, but which one first?

After careful consideration, she let out with the rhythmic battle cry that opened Led Zeppelin's _Immigrant Song._

It was a long, winding sound which climbed higher and higher like an unstoppable tornado picking up more and more wind. Fitting, since once Belle was done, it seemed that the few bits of local plant life had been blown away by a tornado. They were all much further away and in more pieces than they'd been before.

Belle's echo was as loud as the maximum volume of her headphones.

She spun around to look at Sample. He hadn't even started unpacking yet; he was still in the passenger seat, the door open, and his hands under his chin, utterly captivated.

He waved his hands as if to say, _please, sing some more._

Belle decided she would try her new favorite.

_"AND SO, SALLY CAN WAIT,_

_"SHE KNOWS IT'S TOO LATE,_

_"AS WE'RE WALKING ON BY!_

_"HER SOUL SLIDES AWAY,_

_"BUT DON'T LOOK BACK IN ANGER,_

_"I HEARD YOU SAY!"_

This, Belle thought, was real freedom. No buildings to knock over, no ears to deafen. Her only audience was Sample, and he was safe as long as she didn't sing in his direction. Out here, there was nothing but her and her music. She could finally unleash what she spent the rest of her life fighting so hard to keep caged.

When there was finally nothing to fear, it felt amazing. Maybe even more amazing than watching a live show of Queen with the windows down.

Sample applauded her, playing a recording of applause from one of their lip-sync contest victories. She bowed. Sample was the best audience she could ask for.

There was a beeping from inside the jeep. Sample reached inside and took out the communicator. Belle ran up beside him as Stitch and Angel appeared on the screen. Everyone waved hello.

Belle was worried at first, but she relaxed once Angel and Stitch assured them that nothing was wrong and that Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John were okay.

"We just started planning something," Stitch signed. "We're so excited that we just couldn't wait 'till you guys got back."

Belle and Sample leaned closer.

"We're going to do a concert," Angel signed with the most excited grin Belle had ever seen on her.

"A live show like all the real rock bands do! There'll be lights and instruments, and we're gonna perform all our favorites! We're asking a lot of our cousins to join, and we thought you guys would be perfect!"

Belle and Sample couldn't nod eagerly enough. They loved their lip-sync performances and were always happy to try something new. Belle was already wondering if she'd rather play the drums or the piano.

"And Belle," Stitch signed. "We're doing it at this huge stadium! We thought, if you wanted, that it'd be the perfect place for you to sing!"

At that, Belle was overcome with an entirely new feeling. It wasn't the fear of keeping her voice bottled up or the relief of letting it out. It felt as if she were standing on a diving board, afraid to dive in if the water was too cold, but just as scared to climb back down the ladder.

**IV**

Belle loved the rest of the weekend. At night, she and Sample snuggled in their tent, falling asleep to the soothing voices of Barry Manilow, Cyndi Lauper, and Bob Dylan. During the day, she sang her heart out. On the last day, she'd delighted Sample with a full recital of the Beatles' _Magical Mystery Tour. _Then the two sat down together and enjoyed the encore in the form of the recital's echo.

Lastly, of course, there were even more max-volume tunes with the windows down on the highway home.

Then came time for the concert rehearsal. Belle still felt like she was teetering on that diving board.

Aloha Stadium was a massive venue seating a whopping 50,000 people, and Stitch and Angel's band had it all to themselves. Even with their amplifiers, drums, guitars, and piano, there was probably more than enough space left on the field to squeeze in all 627 Experiments.

Walking onto the field, Belle felt like she was in a ghost town, looking at all that empty space, but still seeing the audience who would be gathering there in a few weeks. She could hear their cheers and applause.

Many of her cousins were there, already rehearsing a dance routine. She spotted Bonnie, Clyde, Finder, Sparky, and Felix. Elastico was instructing them, counting down as they twirled, flipped, and kicked their legs high above their heads.

Belle watched them as if they were swimming in the pool beneath her diving board.

"A-One! Two! Three-Four! Five-Six! Seven! _Eight!_ _Great job!" _Elastico applauded his pupils, who had finished their dance in the splits. Felix, in particular, was rewarded with a kiss on the cheek.

Belle and Sample clapped for them. Bonnie and Sparky spotted them and bowed.

"Taka," Finder grunted, struggling to get up. "Now, someone help meega, please."

The new recruits found Stitch and Angel sitting on the piano, each holding a notepad and with a guitar at their side.

_"Hey, Jude?" _Stitch suggested.

"Ih," Angel nodded, jotting away. _"Total Eclipse of the Heart?"_

"Ih. _Changes?"_

"Ih. _Dirty Diana?"_

They looked into each other's black eyes, their stares intense, piercing.

Then they smiled.

_"Ih!"_

Once they were done their writing, they put their notebooks down and went to greet their newest bandmates. There were hugs, inquiries into how much fun the road trip was, and thanks for joining the band. Belle enjoyed the pleasantries knowing that the real dread was due immediately after.

"How do you feel about singing for us?" Angel signed.

Belle shrugged. "I don't think that would be the safest idea."

Stitch shook his head. "This won't be like singing in a club or a park. There's so much space here that nobody will be in any danger from your voice. Plus, in concerts, they always have to use sound equipment so that everyone in the back can hear them over all the screaming. But your voice is already loud enough on its own. It'll be perfect."

Belle tried to picture it; the seats filled with cheering music fans and her about to break into song. She tried, but all she could see were the ruins of Sample's old band's stage.

She just shrugged again.

"Thanks, guys," she signed, "But I'm still not sure. If you want, I can play the drums."

Stitch and Angel exchanged concerned glances. Then they smiled at Belle and gestured to the drum set.

Belle eagerly hopped behind the set. She and Sample played all kinds of instruments in their little house, but she particularly enjoyed the drums. She thought playing them was like dancing. You had to put your whole body into it, starting out soft and then surprising the audience with exciting, spontaneous movements.

She could tell Stitch and Angel weren't expecting her to be a drum player, so to put their doubts to rest, she played the drum solo from Queen's _Keep Yourself Alive. _It was a bouncing, rolling roar of a solo, continually jumping between every part of the drum set. To play it just right, you had to either be a genetic Experiment with superhuman reflexes or Roger Taylor.

The band applauded Belle's performance. She bowed. Sample blew her a kiss, and she caught it.

This should do just fine.

"Okitaka," Stitch called to his cousins. "Let's rehearse! What first, boojiboo?"

Angel consulted her notepad. "Meat Loaf. _Rock and Roll Dreams Come Through."_

"Delicious," Bonnie said.

The band took their places; Angel on lead vocals and guitar, Stitch on bass, Clyde on piano (much to Belle's surprise), and Sample joining the rest on backing vocals and dancers, led by Elastico.

"Know the song, Belle?" Angel asked.

Belle nodded. _'You took the words right out of my mouth,' _she signed.

"Okitaka! One, two, three! _Tookie-bah-wah-bah!"_

Belle started them off with some gentle drumming, joined by Stitch's soothing bass. Elastico's troupe came in with a hypnotic _"Ooh-ooh-oooooh," _with Sample's contribution being ripped from the actual song.

Then Angel came in.

_"You can't run away forever,_

_"But there's nothing wrong with getting a good head start._

_"You want to shut out the night,_

_"You want to shut down the sun,_

_"You want to shut away the pieces of a broken heart."_

Belle couldn't help lip-syncing to Angel's voice. It came as naturally as the rhythm of the drums.

_"Think of how we'd lay down together._

_"We'd be listening to the radio, so loud and so strong,_

_"Every golden nugget coming like a gift of the gods._

_"Someone must've blessed us when he gave us those songs."_

Clyde's piano came in. Belle hadn't pegged him for an instrumentalist of any sort. But she'd be lying if she said she wasn't hypnotized by the way his beefy fingers, both fur and metal, danced on the black and white keys.

_"I treasure your love._

_"I never want to lose it._

_"You've been through the fires of hell,_

_"And I know you've got the scars to prove it._

_"I treasure your love._

_"I wanna show you how to use it._

_"You've been through a lotta pain in the dirt,_

_"And I know you've got the scars to prove it."_

The dancers were fantastic, too, which Belle would only expect from any routine choreographed by Elastico. She wouldn't expect it, however, from the likes of Finder and Felix. She'd known them to track down a missing guitar pick or to make a stage spotless, but she'd never imagined them cutting up a rug. Now, they still weren't cutting a rug; they were painting an invisible landscape with the air around them as their canvas.

_"Remember everything that I told you,_

_"And I'm telling you again that it's true._

_"You're never alone,_

_"'Cause you can put on the phones,_

_"And let the drummer tell your heart what to do."_

The dancers chimed in.

_"Keep on believin',_

_"And you'll discover, baby!"_

Sample's lines, again, were lifted from the actual track, but even so, he seemed to be having the time of his life.

_"There's always something magic._

_"There's always something new._

_"And when you really, really need it the most,_

_"That's when rock and roll dreams come through."_

Belle loved the drums, but she just couldn't completely lose herself to them. She kept trying to, but she kept drifting back into lip-syncing, kept wishing she had the microphone.

But she also kept seeing the ruins of Sample's stage. And she kept thinking of how big the ruins of an even more enormous venue would be.

_"The beat is yours forever,_

_"The beat is always true,_

_"And when you really need it the most,_

_"That's when rock and roll dreams come through."_

She kept teetering on the edge of that diving board.

_"For you."_

**V**

The rehearsals carried on every other day for a month. Belle loved them. The music was incredible, but she also loved getting closer to her cousins.

Finder helped her pick out a wat to wear out and about, a white fedora like what Michael Jackson wore in the video for _Smooth Criminal._

Felix showed her a special trick for cleaning guitar strings. Her own guitar looked brand new now.

And Elastico taught her some acrobatic dance moves. A few backflips and contortions ought to add some extra flair to her and Sample's lip-sync shows.

But when she sat behind those drums, there was a cold feeling which nothing, not Elvis, not Bowie, not even the Beatles could shake off.

It wasn't that she didn't like playing the drums; she loved anything to do with music. But she could never stop herself from borrowing Angel or Stitch's voices.

At the same time, she couldn't stop seeing the ruins of Sample's old stage expanded to the size of Aloha Stadium.

She still felt like she was on her toes at the edge of that diving board.

"What do you think, Freddie?" Belle signed to the fluffy white cat in her lap.

Freddie only meowed.

Belle slumped on the couch, glancing around her living room. It was a small house, but Belle and Sample had turned it into their own music museum.

The left-hand wall was lined with guitars, both acoustic and electric, a violin, a drum set, and an electronic keyboard.

The far wall had a table for their CD and record players.

The right-hand wall had a huge shelf for their record collection.

Sample entered carrying two glasses of iced tea, and his usual adorable smile spread across his face.

"Excited for tomorrow?" He signed after setting the glasses down on the coffee table in front of Belle.

She gave him a mellow nod. His smile vanished.

"What's wrong?" He sat down beside her. "My dancing isn't that bad, is it?"

She comforted him with a lick on the cheek. "I just feel weird. I really want to sing, but I don't think I should. Not after last time."

Belle didn't like seeing Sample without his smile. He just wasn't Sample without it.

She shook her head and waved her hand dismissively. And yet, Sample persisted. His hands fidgeted, trying to sign something, but never quite getting precisely what he wanted.

Finally, he snapped his fingers and hopped to the shelf, taking out a vinyl. Belle spotted the burned orange sky on the cover of Cyndi Lauper's _True Colors._

Sample put it on the turntable, lowered the needle, and the room was filled with the song's gentle, caressing intro.

He offered his hand to Belle.

No matter how she felt, she would always be in the mood to share a dance with Sample.

_You with the sad eyes,_

_Don't be discouraged,_

_Oh, I realize,_

_It's hard to take courage,_

_In a world full of people,_

_You can lose sight of it all._

_The darkness inside you,_

_Can make you feel so small._

They didn't do the exciting moves they usually did; there would be plenty of that tomorrow. They just held each other and swayed.

_Show me a smile, then,_

_Don't be unhappy,_

_Can't remember when,_

_I last saw you laughing._

_This world makes you crazy,_

_And you've taken all you can bear._

_Just call me up,_

_'Cause I will always be there._

Belle looked into Sample's black eyes. He wasn't lip-synching, but it still seemed as though Cyndi Lauper's words were coming from him.

_And I see your true colors,_

_Shining through._

_I see your true colors,_

_And that's why I love you._

_So don't be afraid to let them show._

_Your true colors,_

_True colors,_

_Are beautiful._

Belle nuzzles Sample's microphone nose, making some static sound out from his ears.

She was ready to make the dive. Even if the water were freezing, Sample and the rest of her cousins would be there.

_And when you really need it the most,_

_That's when rock and roll dreams come through._

**VI**

To Belle, it was even better than Christmas.

Backstage was brimming with visitors.

Houdini and Kixx had come to join in with Elastico and Felix's warm-up stretches.

Spooky was helping an anxious Sparky catch his breath.

Victoria wished Finder, Bonnie, and Clyde good luck, while Snooty took a long drink from Finder's long nose.

Lilo, Nani, and David were trading hugs with Stitch and Angel.

And, most surprising of all...

"You two seem flummoxed," Cobra Bubbles greeted Belle and Sample.

"If you must know, I have been assigned security detail. So many Experiments gathered at once makes this place a high-value target."

Sample and Belle exchanged glances. Even if they could speak, they wouldn't know how to respond to that.

"I ask only one thing..." Cobra knelt down, but still towered over the two Experiments. He seemed like a judge glaring down at two incredibly guilty defendants.

"That you perform _Always on My Mind."_

Belle and Sample nodded urgently.

Cobra pulled his sunglasses down, revealing his icy, shark-like eyes.

"The _original. Not _the Pet Shop Boys version."

Belle and Sample nodded even more urgently as if they had jackhammers for necks. They quite liked the Pet Shop Boys version, but they didn't think it would be a smart idea to mention that to Cobra.

"Good." Cobra stood back up. "Break a leg."

Belle and Sample went on their way, wiping sweat from their brows.

"Look at it this way," Sample signed. "Nobody in the audience could be scarier than him."

Belle nodded.

They approached Stitch and Angel, who had just been wished good luck by their visitors. They smiled. Even at their streetside performances, Belle didn't think she'd ever seen them so excited.

Belle waved at them, then breathed in, out, and made her request. "I know it's last-minute, but I was wondering if I could sing?"

Stitch and Angel exchanged surprised looks, then returned to Belle with even wider smiles than before. They nodded.

Belle sighed with relief. She was halfway there. _Livin' on a prayer, _she thought.

At showtime, Belle, Sample, and the rest of the band waited in a small booth at the edge of the stadium while Angel and Stitch introduced them.

_"Alooooooooooo-ha!" _Belle heard them cheer.

_"ALOOOOOOOOOOO-HA!" _Was the near-deafening response.

Belle's heart stopped. It sounded as if the entire island had responded all at once.

_"So happy to see youga! Hope youga happy to see our cousins!"_

That was their cue.

Belle and Sample followed their bandmates out, running onto the grass and into the blinding lights.

Clyde carried Bonnie and Finder on his shoulders. Elastico did a jumping backflip, landing in Felix's arms. Sparky threw a bolt of lightning into the air to a particular uproar of applause.

In a moment of panic and excitement, Belle twirled Sample and kissed him on the cheek. He was on point with one of his most dramatic swoons yet.

They got a lot of whistles for that.

Belle finally got a look at their audience. She hadn't thought much about what 50,000 would look like, but even if she had, she would never have imagined it looking like this. It was like standing on the beach, looking up at a colossal wave about to crash down on her.

The band took their places. Elastico and his dancers up front, Stitch on the drums, and Angel on the piano with her electric guitar. Belle noticed that they all had tiny headsets with microphones on. They would be near impossible to see from afar. Belle hadn't been given one.

Angel smiled at Belle and patted on the top of the piano. Belle went to sit on it.

A somewhat comforting wave of euphoria washed over her as she recognized a few faces. She spotted the hostess from the karaoke bar, the clerk from the music shop, Slushy from the ice cream stand, and a few of her cousins who lived with Mrs. Hasagawa.

They were cheering so loudly, Belle could barely hear herself think.

She wondered what they would do if her voice knocked them all over.

She felt Angel tap her hand. She turned and found her showing her the sheet music for the first song.

Belle lit up. It was her absolute favorite.

The cheering died down; the audience was ready for the show to start. Their silence was as loud as their cheering.

Belle breathed. The water down below seemed freezing.

She looked around. The seats were all empty. The lights were out. The band and the instruments were gone.

She only saw Sample, smiling as sweetly as he had when they first met.

Belle smiled back at him.

She dove in.

_"TONIGHT,_

_"I'M GONNA HAVE MYSELF,_

_"A REAL GOOD TIME!_

_"I FEEL ALIVE!_

_"AND THE WORLD,_

_"I'LL TURN IT INSIDE-OUT, YEAH!_

_"I'M FLOATING AROUND IN ECSTASY,_

_"SO DON'T STOP ME NOW!"_

The audience cheered even louder than before. Belle could hear them as clearly as her own booming voice.

The ground shook, but everything stood right it was.

Belle hopped down from the piano, Elastico's dancers right behind her.

Time to put on a show.

_"'Cause I'm havin' a good time!_

_"Havin' a good time!"_

_"I'M A SHOOTIN' STAR LEAPIN' THROUGH THE SKY,_

_"LIKE A TIGER,_

_"DEFYIN' THE LAWS OF GRAVITY!_

_"I'M A RACIN' CAR, PASSIN' BY,_

_"LIKE LADY GODIVA!_

_"I'M GONNA GO! GO! GO!_

_"THERE'S NO STOPPIN' ME!"_

Belle's cousins picked her up, carrying her around the stadium like a magic carpet.

_"I'M BURNIN' THROUGH THE SKY, YEAH!_

_"TWO HUNDRED DEGREES,_

_"THAT'S WHY THEY CALL ME MISTER FAHRENHEIT!_

_"I'M TRAVELIN' AT THE SPEED 'A LIGHT!_

_"AND I WANNA MAKE A SUPERSONIC MAN OUTTA YOU!"_

Belle pointed at a random member of the audience. He was so shocked that he dropped his ice cream.

With their headsets, the others sounded just as loud as Belle.

As they carried her, she punched the air and made the most dramatic poses she could imagine. She couldn't believe how much she felt like Freddie Mercury, and without even having to borrow his voice.

_"DON'T STOP ME NOW!_

_"I'M HAVIN' SUCH A GOOD TIME!_

_"I'M HAVIN' A BALL!_

_"DON'T STOP ME NOW!_

_"IF YOU WANNA HAVE A GOOD TIME,_

_"JUST GIVE ME A CALL!_

_"DON'T STOP ME,_

_"'CAUSE I'M HAVIN' A GOOD TIME!_

_"DON'T STOP ME,_

_"YES, I'M HAVIN' A GOOD TIME!_

_"I DON'T WANNA STOP AT ALL!"_

The magic carpet ride looped back to the main stage, where Angel and Stitch were rocking out with their guitar and drums.

Belle played them out with a few _la-da-da-da-das. _The audience always matched her volume.

That was only the beginning of a fantastic night.

_"BUT THE BIGGEST KICK I EVER GOT,_

_"WAS DOIN' A THING CALLED THE CROCODILE ROCK!"_

_"WAKE ME UP BEFORE YOU GO-GO!_

_"DON'T LEAVE ME HANGIN' ON LIKE A YO-YO!"_

_"WORKIN' 9 TO 5!_

_"WHAT A WAY TO MAKE A LIVIN'!"_

_"EVERYBODY'S TALKIN' 'BOUT THE NEW SOUND,_

_"FUNNY, BUT IT'S STILL ROCK N' ROLL TO ME!"_

_"EVERY NOW AND THEN I FALL APART!"_

_"HERE I GO AGAIN ON MY OWN!"_

_"OH, OH, OH,_

_"SWEET CHILD OF MINE!"_

_"'CAUSE WE WERE BARELY SEVENTEEN, AND WE WERE BARELY-"_

_"YOU ARE ALWAYS ON MY MIND!"_

_"BUT IF YOU'RE THINKIN' 'BOUT MY BABY,_

_"IT DON'T MATTER IF YOU'RE BLACK OR WHITE!"_

_"ZIGGY PLAYED GUITAR!"_

_"NA, NA, NA, NA!_

_"HEY, JUDE!"_

Belle had never danced so much in her life, let alone sung as much.

As the audience clapped and carried on singing _Hey, Jude, _Belle's eyes met Sample's. She realized that her fur was damp with sweat and that her eyes were filled with tears.

So were his.

_"NA, NA, NA,_

_"NA, NA, NA, NA,_

_"NA, NA, NA, NA,_

_"HEY, JUDE!"_

They ran into each other's arms, squeezing tighter than they ever had before. Their noses touched, and they never wanted to separate them again.

Belle waited for the moment where she would wake up at home, or in the jeep, or in Nani's bedroom ready for her alarm call. It never came.

Of course. This was better than any dream.

_"HEYYYYYYYYY,_

_"JUUUUUUUDE!"_


	8. Episode 7: We Didn't Start the Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cobra Bubbles and Dr. Jumba compile their files on the Experiments.
> 
> Songs Featured:  
*"We Didn't Start the Fire" - Billy Joel

**Episode 7: ** _ **We Didn't Start the Fire** _

**CONFIDENTIAL FILE #604**

**Subject Name: **Houdini

**Powers & Abilities: **Can turn people and things invisible and back again.

**Occupation: **Performing magician.

As a former CIA agent, I know the many advantages of being invisible. I also know how dangerous a so-called 'invisibility generator' can be.

When I first began observing Houdini, she had just started her magic career. I initially didn't believe her constant shows of nervousness. I was suspicious that it was all as much of an act as her magic shows. I thought she might only be building up an innocent persona before using her powers to exploit the sympathy bestowed upon her. However, as she kept performing, kept getting showered with applause, autographs, and contracts, it became clear that my theory was incorrect. Not only did Houdini grow into a confident performer, but no foul play ever occurred around any of her venues.

Still, it's always worth another look.

The last time I observed Houdini, she was waiting to audition for _Cirque de Lune. _What continually mystifies me about performers is how they're never satisfied for long in a single routine. Houdini is no exception, taking on birthday parties, after-grads, and now a circus after doing cruise ships, Hollywood, and Vegas. I could never see any practicality in changing routines for the sake of it. In my line of work, you only make changes when you are ordered to or when it is absolutely imperative. But I suppose there isn't much practicality in show business to begin with.

I was incognito at the other end of the waiting room, wearing a Hawaiian shirt with a newspaper in front of me. In hindsight, I must have stood out; the rest of the plastic chairs were filled with jugglers, contortionists, acrobats, and sword-swallowers.

Houdini was there in the same top hat and cape she wore on television, practicing card tricks in a chair by the radio. She couldn't possibly have needed to audition. No show in the world would pass up an extraterrestrial invisibility generator. I could smell the anxiety on the others, the pressure of having to make an incredible impression in mere minutes. Yet Houdini was there, playing with cards and humming along to the radio. (At one point, she sang along, _"I heard the news today, oh boy." _The others looked at her, chuckled, then went back to their own respective calming rituals.) If I had to guess, I'd say she simply enjoys the suspense the way a skydiver enjoys jumping out of a plane.

Again, show business isn't known for its practicality.

After a few people had been ushered in, somebody got up and left. Caucasian, spiky red hair, freckled face, and wearing a straitjacket. I'd been keeping an eye on him, as well, in case he was an escaped mental patient and not merely an escapologist. Out of all the waiting auditioners, he seemed the most anxious.

I got up to follow him, in case he was up to something, and, to my surprise, Houdini went after him first. I went outside and stood by the door, still pretending to be invested in the news, and overheard Houdini's conversation with the escapologist.

Houdini sat down beside the restrained man on the sidewalk. He seemed taken aback at first, but the offer of a handshake seemed to calm him down. He introduced himself as [REDACTED], a student from [REDACTED]. He was what some might call a "downer." Houdini introduced herself much more merrily, perhaps hoping her lighter spirit would be contagious. [REDACTED] only responded with a mellow, "Yeah. I know who you are."

They spoke for a while. I couldn't understand why Houdini would trouble herself with someone so crestfallen. I know that conversation with me is not the highlight of anyone's day, regardless of whether I'm on or off-duty (though some might argue that I'm never off-duty). My peers and acquaintances are too polite (or too scared) to say it outright, but I know they're thinking it (it is part of my job). The only difference is that people are often required to speak with me. Houdini, however, was under no obligation to interact with this miserable escapologist. Yet, she almost defiantly kept up her jovial demeanor with each despondent response.

Perhaps finally moved by Houdini's personability, [REDACTED] eventually revealed that success had consistently eluded him all his life. He was only able to graduate school at the bare minimum requirement. The only skill he had was escaping inescapable restraints. He confessed, "I want to make the cut so badly. It's the only thing I've ever really wanted. But I've never been able to do anything properly before, so how can I even do this?"

Houdini took off her top hat and placed a paw on [REDACTED]'s knee. I was surprised to find that she was still smiling. She told him, "Ih. Maybe go in and mess up. Maybe Ringmaster naga like escape tricks. Or maybe youga do great and get to be in circus. Or youga go up and never get in. What youga think?"

It occurred to me why Houdini had bothered to converse with this glum individual. She was gazing into a mirror reflecting her former self.

[REDACTED] did something which, for him, was more impressive than escaping a straitjacket; he smiled. He made another confession; "I wanted to say, I'm a huge fan."

Houdini went to hug him, but stopped, remembering that his arms were bound. [REDACTED] inhaled, shifting his arms until he could get them to lift a strap up to his teeth. He pulled, and he was free to embrace his new performing companion. Moments later, they were called back inside for their audition. I may not see much practicality in performing, but I have to admire anyone who can bring out the courage in those who need it most.

***Additional: **Was very impressed with [REDACTED]'s segment of _Cirque de Lune. _Consider for test runs of new security system.

**DR. JUMBA JOOKIBA'S TOP-SECRET EVIL GENIUS EXPERIMENT FILES:**

**EXPERIMENT: **601

**NAME: **Kixx

**FUNCTION: **Unstoppable galaxy-class kickboxer, front-line tank.

When I first attempt making ultimate super-weapon of destruction, I worry not so much about size. 625 and 626 are carry-on size super-weapons, but 601 breaks bank on overweight baggage fees.

First missions of 601 incredible success. Buildings leveled, property vandalized, pretentious modern art destroyed. Only flaw is 601 just slightly too slow. Screaming people almost get away while running like Pleakley when Earth dress shop have sale.

In Jumba's evil genius opinion, there three types of strength in galaxy. First is strength of brain, despite arguings of cushy, baby-faced trogs at _Daily Galactic News. _Second is strength of leadership. Grand Councilwoman, for instance. As leader of Federation, one thinks, _oh, no, don't mess with Councilwoman. _But take leadership away, is like fighting Jumba's grandmother. Just not fair. Third is old-fashioned strength; kind you only get by waking up at five in morning and lifting weights all day, or by being one of Jumba's Experiments. But as long as someone is having most of any kind of power, they tend to be rubbing it in other faces.

601 was not exception. Unless on mission, he was always finding ways to show off super-strength, usually to other Experiments. He pick fight with all 600 predecessors, big ones like 021 and even little ones like 110. And, of course, 601 win every time. I design him this way; what else is expected? But this is what makes behavior so strange. 601 strong because Jumba make him strong, so why 601 brag about own strength and not Jumba's genius?

But since Lilo and Stitch find place for Kixx on Earth, I notice tremendous change. I see change in all my Experiments, but Kixx is one of greatest changes. No longer picking fights needlessly, now he is personal trainer and going-off-then-getting-on-again performer. But most impressive are transmissions I receive from him. (If you tell Jumba years ago that 601 be sending transmissions, I call Galactic Police and have you sent to Galactic Loony Bin.)

I include most recent of these transmissions:

_Aloha, Jumba._

_Hope the search for Hamsterviel is going well. Tell Pleakley I said aloha, too._

_I wanted to tell you about something that happened to me yesterday. I was going to meet some cousins at the movies. On the way, I passed by a construction site where they're building a fancy new hotel. It's not quite done yet. Kinda looks like a skeleton right now._

_Anyway, I don't know what happened exactly, but it seemed like one of the workers had lost control of this big lifting machine, and it crashed into one of the building's iron supports, knocking it over. The whole place looked ready to topple down. All the workers were running for their lives. I didn't even think. I just ran there as fast as I could, planted myself where the iron support used to be, and kept the building upright myself. I would've just grabbed the thing and put it back, but it had rolled too far away for me to reach, and there was no way I could leave my spot for even a second. So I stood there for a good long while so the workers could get the support back in its place._

_It's funny. I always thought I was so strong that there was nothing I couldn't do by myself. But when I looked down at that big iron stick just out of my reach, when I realized that I couldn't do this all by myself, I felt something I never felt before. I felt like I needed help._

_Weird, right?_

_Being stuck there, holding that tower up, felt weird, too. It was a bit like how I felt in gym sessions, shows, or even back in the lab ages ago, but different. All those times, I felt good because I was doing something only I could do. People would thank me for lessons or clap at my shows. I knew only I could hold this tower up, but I wasn't doing it for thanks or applause or to feel strong. I was doing it because only I could do it._

_Afterward, the guys were so grateful that they said they'd buy me dinner after their shifts. It was nice, and I thanked them, but the whole thing had me thinking about my strength. I've been thinking about it more and more since Stitch and Lilo helped me out, but yesterday really set it in stone for me. My strength isn't a toy, it's a gift that I should share._

_I wanted to send this transmission to say thank you. If you hadn't given me this gift, then yesterday would've been a really bad day for a lot of people._

_Sorry it took so long._

_All the best from your ohana here on Earth,_

_-Kixx._

Like I say, tremendous change.

Must now be ending entry. Tears are getting keyboard wet.

**CONFIDENTIAL FILE #277**

**Subject Name: **Snooty

**Powers & Abilities: **Flight via underarm wingspan, can sniff out and consume an extraterrestrial substance which closely resembles mucus.

**Occupation: **Sinus-clearer for Victoria Baker.

Some people, when describing the Experiments, will use words such as "disgusting," "abomination," and "weird." I cannot deny that I didn't think much of the first few I encountered. But with an open mind, one can see that co-existence with these creatures is not just sheer generosity, but in fact, extremely beneficial to humans.

Case-in-point, Snooty.

I initially found the Experiments' consumption of their own and each other's boogers quite repugnant. However, Dr. Jumba assured me that an Experiment's snot is highly nutritious and incredibly healthy for any race in the galaxy. Despite this, I think I'll stick to protein bars.

Snooty, however, represents more than the apparently-healthy act of an Experiment consuming his or her own mucus. He's been staying with the Baker household since shortly after they moved from Toronto. Their youngest, Victoria, suffers from nasal congestion, or at least she did before they took Snooty in. It is a mutualistic relationship; Victoria's sinuses are cleared, and Snooty is fed. During a recent inspection, Victoria informed me that she often forgets that she even has nasal congestion at all.

Additionally, according to Victoria's mother and uncle, Snooty's presence has eliminated the need for medication or treatments, therefore saving the family a significant amount of money. At the end of the day, this is still a creature who eats mucus. Still, the benefits Snooty brings to the Baker family are irrefutable.

Though I am no scientist, the possibility occurs to me that these benefits could be spread to a broader scale. Perhaps Snooty might hold the cure for the common cold. If so, this would be a task I would implore Snooty to take of his own accord. I would never condone the forceful separation of anyone from their family, Experiment, or otherwise. Not after all I've been through.

***Additional: **Passed Snooty and Victoria in the street today. Snooty cleared the nose of a particularly-congested woman outside the local police station. Upon closer inspection, I discovered that the woman, [REDACTED], was about to take an exam to become an officer.

***Additional: **Spotted [REDACTED] on patrol a week later.

***Additional: **Witnessed an attempted robbery at the bank today. Was about to intervene when [REDACTED] did so first. Quite gracefully, if I might add. She never even had to draw her weapon.

***Additional: **[REDACTED] was recommended to the New York Police Department.

***Additional: **Looked up [REDACTED] several weeks after she moved. Discovered she had exposed a plot to kidnap the mayor and stopped them before they'd even left their safehouse.

Again, nobody can deny the benefits which Experiments like Snooty offer us.

**DR. JUMBA JOOKIBA'S TOP-SECRET EVIL GENIUS EXPERIMENT FILES:**

**EXPERIMENT: **021

**NAME: **N/A

**FUNCTION: **Champion wrestler, dead-set on victory.

021 was Jumba's first attempt at super-strong Experiment. I borrow DNA from deadly disemboweler, mangyloid, and Russian Olympians. Incredible success; 021 lift five space pods above head, bench seven tonnes with legs, and defeat Jumba's big sausage fingers in every thumb wrestle. She was everything I wanted out of latest project. But the thing about being evil genius is you never say, "this is best I can do." You are always one-upping own evil genius self with each new invention. So, as great as 021 is, I try to go bigger.

Hence next six-hundred-and-six Experiments.

There are times when I am not so proud of my evil-genius-ness. One such time, I find many Experiments crowding in lab. I am wondering if 020 is making auction on stolen cargo until I squeeze into center. I find 601 and 021 having arm-wrestle contest. 020 is, of course, taking bets. Having inherited Mama Jumba's nosiness, I cannot help but glance at betting sheet and see that odds of 601 are very unfairly greater than odds of 021. (About 598-to-1, if Jumba is remembering correctly.)

Arm-wrestle goes on for few minutes. 021 and 601's faces become so red that I worry they stay that color. Finally, 601 pushes hard enough to knock 021 out of chair and onto floor. Then everyone is cheering for 601 and collecting winnings from 020. 601 is enjoying it, too, until he takes terrible whack on back of head with chair from 021. Then 021 is storming off while other Experiments help 601 up. Is funny; everyone seem sure that 601 beat 021, but then nearly fall on rear end getting out of her way. Suppose is easier to talk than to act.

I make sure 601 is okay (of course he is; Jumba programmed him to be chair-resistant.), then go after 021. I find her sitting by window, rather than looking out at stars and planets, instead is crying. I design Experiments to cause destruction, chaos, and general inconvenience, not to cry. But even being evil genius, I hate to see Experiments upset. I ask 021 if she is okay. She say to me, "Why do you even keep me around?! If 601's stronger than me, then there's no point in me; is there?!" I try to tell her that all Experiments are successes. She say, "Yeah, but some of us aren't as successful as others."

This make me remember school reunion, seeing people with names I cannot care to be remembering, all arguing over who is most successful. Is it lawyer, or blaster manufacturer, or armada commander? But they all agree that anything is better than evil genius.

I try to tell 021 that I know feeling, that I have lost many arm-wrestles, too. She gives me cold stare, which I thought I only programmed 300 to do. "Just leave me alone, Jumba," she says. "601 might be stronger than me, but you aren't, are you?"

No need to say, but I get picture. I wish I could give solution, but suppose Jumba is part of problem.

It has been long time now since I last see 021. Since meeting Lilo and Nani, I have been grateful each and every day for new perspective of life. But with it, I wonder now if I could have done more for 021. Perhaps being evil genius really not so great if it hurts ohana.

I hope Lilo and Stitch find her. She needs them more than me.

**CONFIDENTIAL FILE #621**

**Subject Name: **Experiment 621 [placeholder]

**Powers & Abilities: **Skilled infiltrator, tactician, and marksman. [additional details pending]

**Occupation: **Revolutionary.

Here's a story for any agent who finds the night shift unstimulating.

Last night, as I was pouring my coffee, I heard a slight thump. A lazy or ignorant man might've dismissed this as a nocturnal animal outside. I have been called many things in my life, but none of them have been lazy or ignorant. The sound had come from the archive room. Grabbing a pistol from the weapons storage, I went to investigate. The room was pitch black, so I turned the light on. Nothing seemed amiss; only rows upon rows of more boxes of records than anyone would realistically read.

I scanned both sides of the room before entering. Considering the recurring presence of aliens who can cling to vertical and inverted surfaces, I must ensure that future agents are trained to also scan upward.

The subject is green-furred with white hands and feet, along with a stripe of fur on his head shaped like a mohawk. He is taller than the average Experiment. Not quite reaching heights such as those of Kixx or Clyde, but where most reach three feet, this one reaches four. His limbs are also longer. I assume this is to increase the practicality of wielding the many alien firearms attached to his torso. He is also skinnier, less muscle mass than his cousins. Where most of them are known for their strength, this one seems more focused on agility. He had a stack of files under his lower left arm. Later cataloging of the archives confirmed that they were files on several Experiments. With all this noted, I was able to focus entirely on the blaster aimed at my head.

I asked if he went by name or number.

"621," he answered. He dared to add, "Now, it would be too easy for me to get rid of you right now, but I don't want to put my traitorous brethren on their toes just yet. So, I'm going to head on out with these files, and you're going to stand perfectly still until I'm gone. Understand?"

I took off my glasses, giving him a stare that should have educated him. I told him, "What I do understand is that you're new around here, so I shall make this simple enough for you to comprehend. You can count how many people have ever threatened me on one of your three-clawed hands, and I assure you that each of them considered it their lifelong regret. I would advise you to tread carefully. As I am friends with your cousins, I am being extremely generous. And my generosity should not be dismissed lightly."

It was one of my better moments of improvisational speech. Unfortunately, it seemed a waste. Where most people would shrivel up, 621 broke into a fanged grin. He was looking down at me both literally and figuratively. He delivered an improvisational speech of his own.

"You realize I'm from space, don't you? Can you imagine the things I've faced on my way here? Ten-foot golems made from asteroids. Hunters who blend into liquid and fog. Sandworms that could swallow this entire island whole. After all that, do you really think you can scare me by taking off your sunglasses?"

I didn't quit the stare. If he wanted me to stop, he'd have to shoot me, and I knew he wouldn't. As he said, he didn't want to reveal himself just yet. I kept the stare, and he kept the grin. We must have stood there for several minutes. The unstoppable force and the immovable object.

Finally, he broke the silence. "You're not like the others. Neither am I." He holstered his blaster and flipped to an open panel on the ceiling. "Thanks for making this a little more interesting."

I should have followed him, but I could tell that everything he said about golems and sandworms wasn't just talk. If I were to confront him alone on his territory, I wouldn't stand a chance. He had let me off easy this time out of tactics, not out of cowardice. I have seen the latter many times in my career, and I did not see it in 621.

One might find what he said about me disheartening. On the contrary, it came as a tremendous relief to me. In my line of work, it helps to be intimidating. People flinch when I pass them in the street, let alone when I actually mean to terrify them. Over these past few years, I'd been beginning to believe that I was the most frightening thing out there. I cannot describe how it feels to know that I'm not.

**DR. JUMBA JOOKIBA'S TOP-SECRET EVIL GENIUS EXPERIMENT FILES:**

**EXPERIMENT: **624

**NAME: **Angel

**FUNCTION: **Mind control using siren song.

Angel send me transmission today. Inside was photos and video of show she and other Experiments did on Earth. I almost did not recognize her. Playing guitar, waving antennae about, long hair covering eye (not sure how she can see), and singing all this type of Earth music called "rocking and rolling." Video have her singing song with strange Earth names before main part:

_We didn't start the fire._

_It was always burning,_

_Since the world's been turning._

_We didn't start the fire._

_No, we didn't light it,_

_But we tried to fight it._

Not sure what this is meaning. Jumba wonders if Experiments get framed for arson. Or maybe it means fire at center of Earth.

But seeing pictures of Angel now make me think of old 624. I dig up old records and compare. I make 624 to be mind-controller, to use special song to make others do just what 624 and Jumba want. In my humble evil genius opinion, one of my greatest successes. But I realize now that, back then, I only think of success as being if functions work or not. I know now that a successful Experiment is so much more.

I find old pictures and recordings of original 624 missions. I did not think about it then, but though she is _looking _happy, it isn't _feeling _like she is. Feels like everyone who hears siren song, just doing something because they are told to.

Then I remember days before Pleakley and I leave to help Federation. Nani find box full of records of many different Earth musicians. Just about every second of day, Angel and Stitch are listening to them, dancing and singing along. I always find Stitch's feelings for Angel interesting, as I program him to be immune to siren song. I think what I only see in her now, he see from moment they meet. This, I believe, he pick up from Lilo.

And now I see video of this concert. There is thing on Earth called irony. Has nothing to do with metal iron. Is when what you think will happen happens, but in different way from what you expect. I design Angel to control entire planets with siren song. In video, she gets audience to clap, to stomp, to sing along, but instead, she uses this song about not starting fire. As I watch, I realize why Angel was unhappy with siren song, why she and Stitch are such peas in pod, and why she grow eye-covering hair. She is making programming of her own. She is choosing her own songs, not the one I choose for her. In fact, I am even told that she cannot remember words to old song.

I think I understand meaning of fire song. It was Jumba who started fire, and Experiments are trying to put it out. (Though Jumba is not very good at song interpretation. Remember David laughing when I say _Hotel California _is about one-star bed-and-breakfast).

Jumba is not very sad person, but thinking of this, I feel like mangyloid droppings. All the work I put into making 624, I was really just keeping Angel trapped inside. Really, I have been doing same with all Experiments. Jumba has had many successes with Experiments, but nothing as successful as Lilo's ohana. Not even close. But even so, getting these transmissions, knowing Experiments want to share amazing accomplishments with me, knowing they miss me, it seems Jumba is forgiven.

I think my next project will be to really earn their forgiveness.

_*Command initiated. Deleting file: Siren Song for 624*_

**CONFIDENTIAL FILE #626**

**Subject Name: **Stitch

**Powers & Abilities: **Fireproof/bulletproof skin, super-strength (known to lift as much as 3000 times his own weight), multi-instrumentalist.

**Occupation: **Guitarist/drummer/pianist/bassist/saxophonist/harmonicist/triangle player for _The X-Periments._

The first time I met Stitch, he threw a hardcover copy of _Anna Karenina _by Leo Tolstoy at my face. He broke my favorite pair of sunglasses.

I should've apprehended him. Instead, I did what I never do; I gave him another chance. Perhaps it was because I knew what he meant to Lilo.

After that was an incident involving two spaceships battling in the Earth's atmosphere and the Grand Councilwoman of the Galactic Federation arriving on the planet, which is all documented in file #2002 for those interested. As a result, I was personally assigned by the Grand Councilwoman to be vigilant over the Pelekai family (a task which becomes increasingly daunting with each new cousin).

But before the Pelekai family began to comprise most of the population of Kokaua Town, Stitch did something which surprised me. As I observed him in the days following the incident, ensuring his good behavior was completely genuine, I witnessed him going on a tour of the town. He went about it with a mellow but accepting look I've only seen on people in courtrooms, approaching the judge while dressed in orange.

He bought ice cream for a man who was sunbathing. He gave a repaired camera to a blonde tourist. He even returned a tricycle to a girl in glasses who I've known to mistreat Lilo at school. They each looked at him strangely, but then smiled and comforted him with a pat on the head or a scratch behind the ears. Even the girl from school gave him a hesitant but sincere "thank you."

Next, I saw him enter a glasses shop. Minutes later, he exited and made his way towards me. I'd been following at a distant, blending in where I could, but he walked up to me as if he'd known where I was the whole time. He looked up at me with that apologetic stare. With the height difference between us, I felt like I was on a judge's stand. He handed me a case containing a set of black sunglasses similar to the ones that had met their end under _Anna Karenina._

I asked him how he got the money to pay for all these things.

"Stitch has to work for ice cream stand for a day," he answered. "Camera store for a week. Glasses store for two weeks."

At that, I did something else I never do. I reached for my wallet and asked him how much the sunglasses were. He held up his hands, shielding himself from my generous notion.

"Stitch wants to do it," he said. His apologetic look became a broken smile.

I knew how he felt. I know how it feels to want more than anything to right my own wrongs. I put my wallet back and patted him on the head. I felt even more like I was on a judge's stand because it seemed that I was releasing a changed prisoner. When he looked at me again, his eyes were full of tears. The creature who stood before me wasn't the same one who had thrown a hardcover copy of _Anna Karenina _at me only days ago.

I've had many regrets in my career. I've made a lot of wrong decisions, bad calls, and questionable conclusions. But whenever I pass Stitch on the street or see him in concert or at family gatherings, I can take a little comfort in knowing I made at least one right call.


	9. Episode 8: Life on Mars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 627 has a few questions.
> 
> Songs Featured:  
*"Life on Mars?" - David Bowie  
*"Yesterday" - The Beatles  
*"Father and Son" - Cat Stevens  
*"Daniel" - Elton John

**Episode 8: ** _ **Life on Mars** _

**I**

"Two half-calorie snow cones coming right up."

Slushy took a waffle cone in his icicle fingers. He blew a perfect, glistening snowball onto it, then handed it to his assistant.

Dupe hung upside-down, clinging to the stand's umbrella pole with his feet. He and Slushy held the snow cone as Dupe zapped it with a ray from the antennae on his head, sprouting into a flowery shape. They each pulled and came away with their own cone.

Dupe grabbed onto the edge of the umbrella, catching his cone between his two toes and handing (or footing) it to one of the blonde twins waiting.

With the other twin, Slushy simply traded his cone for two dollars.

"Dankeschon," the twin said. "Um...Mahalo."

Slushy smiled. "Dankeschon."

The twin lit up. "Bitte."

The twins left, enjoying their snow cones, while Slushy reached under the counter and jotted 'dankeschon' on his list of thanks.

The first strips of orange were gliding across the late afternoon sky. They, coupled with all the smiles he'd seen today, made Slushy feel warm.

"Youga can go, Dupey," he said.

"Sure, Slush?" Dupe asked, dangling from the top of the umbrella pole.

"Ih. Youga great today. Meega finish up." Slushy held out his icy arms to catch his assistant.

"Okitaka." Dupe dropped down, landing his feet on Slushy's chilly palms.

"Lip-karaoke tonight. Gonna try and beat Belle and Sample." He jumped, backflipped, and landed on his feet outside the stand.

Slushy laughed.

"Youga see." Dupe folded his arms and gave a cocky smirk.

"Have fun, Dupey."

"Ditto, Slush."

As Dupe skipped away, Slushy wiped down the counters, turned up the radio, and sang along with David Bowie.

_"Sailors fighting in the dance hall._

_"Oh man, look at those cavemen go._

_"It's the freakiest show."_

He went to help the next customer, already excited to see another smile.

_"Take a look at the lawman, beating up the wrong guy."_

There was no smile, but that was the least surprising thing about this customer.

Slushy stopped singing, but David, as always, carried on.

_Oh man, wonder if he'll ever know._

"So do I," 627 said.

Slushy paused for a moment. He'd heard that 627 was back, but never imagined that he'd single him out, of all Experiments. He went back to wiping the counter. 627 looked too blue for a fight, but even if it came to that, Slushy felt like he could take him on.

_He's in the best-selling show._

"Why long face?" Slushy asked. "Heard you naga stop laughing first time."

"That's just the thing," 627 replied. "A lot's changed since then...Well, _everything's _changed, really. When you...Changed your mind, I guess, did you look back on what you used to be like and feel like...Like you were looking at a different person?"

Slushy shrugged. "Naga. Sometimes meega think about those days. Feels terrible because meega know better now. But everyone make mistakes...But youga different. Naga 627; more like someone in 627 costume."

627 gave a weak chuckle. It was more like a humorous cough. "That's how I feel, like I'm walking around disguised as someone I'm not. Trouble is, I don't know who I am without the disguise."

Slushy raised a snowy eyebrow. "Youga _really _not like old 627."

"Yeah, I know more than one word now. I'm still getting used to it myself."

They both laughed. 627's was more than a humorous cough this time. Now it was like a jovial hiccup.

"Why youga here?" Slushy asked.

"I'm not going to try and capture you."

"Naga. Youga do already if youga wanted."

627 sighed. "I just...I need to talk to someone. Anyone. You were the first Experiment I came across."

Slushy kept expecting the crimson fur to unzip and reveal PJ shouting, _April Fools, _even though it was June. But with each word, that drooping face became ever more believable.

And what kind of ice cream man would he be if he didn't at least try to turn a frown upside-down?

"Okitaka." Slushy gestured to one of the stools beside the stand. "Sit. Talk. Meega listen."

627 sat down, folding his arms on the counter. He breathed in, out, and began his tale.

_Is there life on Mars?_

**II**

_"You think you know me?! You know nothing about me!"_

627 struck the slobbering red beast on the jaw. He struck it again, and again, and again. It looked up to growl, "Evil," and he hit it again.

He had to get rid of it, had to beat it, had to throw it out into the rain, and leave it to freeze.

It caught his fist. Its eyes glowed yellow.

"Perhaps," 300's voice crept from the beast's sopping jaw. "But you're hardly the expert either, are you?"

**III**

"Okay. Show me."

627 knew that 621 and 021 wouldn't be happy with him, but he didn't care. At that moment, his intrigue overwhelmed him.

He had never met 010 before, but he knew that he was designed to be a cleaner. Then how come he was being so resistant? 627 could smell the fear on him as they fought, but somehow, it hadn't been enough to make him back down.

And then there were the flowers. With everything at stake, why did 010 keep clinging to those flowers?

627 knew what his mission was. But he knew that if he didn't get the answers to these questions, he'd go crazy.

He was beginning to think that this new 'thinking' business might be trouble than it was worth.

He sat on the elevated platform and watched the whole show. It seemed to last for both a moment and a lifetime. 010 and 345 were dangling upside-down from the tightrope, then suddenly they were on the ground, held up by 601 to a cheering audience. 345 had the flowers, while the recording of 624's song lay in crumpled bits on the ground.

The tent was filled with cheers and applause. 627 was fixated on 345, 010, and their flowers. There must be millions of flowers all over the planet, so what was unique about these ones? He couldn't understand it.

There were a lot of things he couldn't understand about this place and these Experiments. He'd asked 621 about it, but his answers always boiled down to the same thing; everything about this planet was wrong, and it was wrong because it wasn't what 621 and 021 believed. But if it was wrong, then why did it bother 627 so much that he couldn't understand it?

627 thought he should make himself scarce. It wasn't just that he didn't want to get in a fight with the other Experiments. He wanted to find some flowers.

**IV**

It was a short fight.

621 was unarmed and 021 was still weakened. 625 chose not to participate, so it had mostly been 627 vs. Gantu.

Gantu still had a few restraining nanobots left in his blaster. Unfortunately for him, 627 managed to catch one and fling it back before it could ensnare him.

_"No!" _The giant shark exclaimed as he was bundled up by the metal coils.

_"This isn't fair!"_

"Maybe you should've thought of that before you picked a fight with someone stronger than you," 627 retorted as he approached a downed Gantu, placing a foot on his shoulder.

"Come on, 627," Gantu exhaled, forcing a feeble smile onto his sweaty face.

"For old time's sake?"

627's mind was suddenly bombarded with stale memories. The ship seemed familiar to him; he could recall lazing about the place, making it filthy, and kicking 625 about it. He couldn't remember why he did any of it. He wasn't sure he'd even thought about it.

"I'm not that 627 anymore." The words felt hollow.

"The best you can hope for is a little chat with me," 021 growled, dragging Gantu by the collar of his uniform.

"About where the Grand Councilwoman hangs out these days."

"You sure you can handle it, 021?" 621 asked. "You've still got a ways to go before you're at your full strength again."

"Well, the exercise will speed it up, won't it?" 021 snapped. She seemed to regret it instantly.

"But yeah, I can handle it...Thanks."

There was silence from the Experiments as she dragged a begging, complaining Gantu away. Finally, 625 broke it.

"Hey, uh, all that excitement must-a worked up an appetite. Want me to whip you boys up some grilled cheese or somethin'?"

"If you like," 621 replied. "Good to have you with us, 625."

"You're tellin' me," 625 chirped as he scurried off.

621 got to work on the ship's computer console, familiarizing himself with the functions, files, and commands therein.

627 sat nearby, replaying two things in his head.

The first was from the song 624 had sung to irritate Gantu. Most of the words had been lost to 627, as Gantu kept shouting over them, but one had managed to stick in his mind.

_You see, I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue._

The second was what the red-headed girl had answered when he'd asked her why she freed him.

_Nobody gets left behind._

They were both confusing him. As he looped them in his mind, he felt like he was putting some kind of puzzle together. If he could just find the right shapes, the right slots, then the picture would become clear to him forever. But he felt like he had some pieces missing.

He looked at 621, typing away. Looking, or even thinking about him, confused 627, as well, but in a different way. Somehow, he knew he would have to solve the other puzzle to solve this one.

Still, he couldn't help but try.

"621?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you reprogram me?"

621 stopped typing and looked at him. After a moment, he went back to it.

"I told you. 021 and I thought it would send a message to the Experiments on Earth."

"I know," 627 replied, "but it's a lot of work to go to just for a message, isn't it? Swiping my pod, getting the programming pod. And I don't know anything about reprogramming an Experiment, but it's not easy, is it?"

"No...I spent two whole days just expanding your vocabulary."

They both laughed. 627 didn't laugh often, but whenever he did, he could hear the infamous growling, raspy cackle of his former self.

It was a shame because he found he quite liked to laugh, but it was all spoiled by these rotten memories.

621 was different. It seemed as though he liked to laugh, too, but didn't feel like he was allowed to. He always stopped abruptly, as if afraid somebody would catch him if he went on for too long.

"But there must've been dozens of things you could've done to send a message," 627 continued, his laughter melting into a stern but sad look.

"And I can't help but feel like you haven't really _needed _me for any of these missions. Even fighting Gantu just now; if that shot were meant for you or 021, I know either of you could've caught it just as easily as I did. I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but...You reprogrammed me so I could think. That's what you said. And I can't help thinking about why."

621 sighed. He shut the computer off and turned to 627. He stood up straight, his eyes locked on 627's as if he were a soldier reporting to a general.

"I couldn't stand knowing where you were," he finally answered. "Stuck in pod form, and before that, a mindless monster with less autonomy than a mangyloid. Yes, me and 021 likely could've managed without you, but I would never stop thinking about you. And if I were stuck where you were, all I'd want would be for someone to help me...So I did. It took a long time, 021 wouldn't stop pestering me about what an investment it was, and there were times when I wasn't sure I could pull it off. But I did it because it was simply the only thing _to _do."

627 didn't know what to say. He thought about thanking 621, but he wasn't sure if he was really in a better place at all. He didn't want to go back to pod form, and certainly not back to his cackling old self. He didn't feel like his current state, throttled with questions but powerless to find answers, was better or worse. He was as stuck now as he was in his gumball-sized pod.

But even so, he felt like he was close to something he could never have had as his former self. He watched 621 take control of the ship, thought about 021 interrogating Gantu. Both Experiments were already planning the next phase in their plan, and 627 finally realized that he didn't care about any of it. He didn't think he ever had; he'd only gotten this far because he hadn't gotten the hang of the whole 'thinking' thing yet.

He finally knew what to say.

"Thank you." It came out more like an apology. With that, he went to leave the room.

"There's one more reason..." 621 responded. He hesitated. "I...I thought it would make me feel a little less alone."

"Did it?"

621 hesitated again. He rubbed his eye. "Yeah."

627 nodded. "Glad I could do something right." He left. He knew what he had to do. It was going to hurt 621, but to 627, it was the only thing to do.

He found the escape pods. To his surprise, 625 was ducking into one of the many circular doors. The color fled from his face.

"Oh, hey there, 627, ol' bud," he chuckled feebly. "Just, uh, lookin' for the brioche. Can never remember where I put the darn things."

"You're leaving, too?" 627 asked.

"Leavin'. W-Why would ya think-" The color blinked back to his face.

"Wait, whaddaya mean, 'too?'"

627 looked over his shoulder to make sure neither 621 or 021 were nearby.

"It's hard to explain...All I know is that there's a lot I need to figure out, and the answers aren't here."

"Hey, I know that feeling," 625 replied. "Right now, for instance, I need to figure out where the best deli in the galaxy is, and all I know is it ain't here."

"That's where you're going?"

"Yeah. What, didja think I was goin' to the library?"

"Possibly," 627 smiled. "To get a cookbook on sandwiches."

"Well, ya got me there," 625 laughed. "What about you? Where ya headed?"

"Earth."

"Goin' to stay with our blue cousin?"

627 didn't answer. He'd considered that 626 might have the answers he needed, but he couldn't imagine how he could face him after all he'd done.

"For what it's worth," 625 added, "he and those Earthlings he hangs out with really do care about us. _All _of us. Heck, I'll probably head on down there once I'm all sandwiched out."

"...Even the ones like me?" 627 asked.

"Hey." 625 patted him on the shoulder. "Everyone down there was as crummy as you used to be at some time or another. Even blue-boy. They all helped each other through it, and they'll do the same for you if you want."

"If I want..." 627 whispered. Could it really be that simple?

"Yeah. Just go down there and ask a few if ya don't believe me." 625 turned back to the circular door.

"Anyway, I better be off. Don't know when the place closes."

"Sure," 627 said. "...Sorry for kicking you around."

625 turned back to him, smiling. "I know."

**V**

It had taken a crowd of 50,000 people for 627 to realize just how alone he felt. It was either the fact that he didn't know a single face in the audience, or that he was sitting high above them, on top of a light fixture.

These strange sounds and words which the Experiments and Earthlings were so obsessed with mystified him. He had never understood it, but then again, he had never really listened to it until now. He was beginning to get an idea. His rattled brain thought more clearly than ever with these peculiar melodies. And that was the main difference between his old and new selves, wasn't it; being able to think?

Though 627's seat was above the edge of the arena, 248's voice was as clear as if she were right beside him.

_"Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away,_

_"Now it looks as though they're here to stay._

_"Oh, I believe in yesterday."_

He felt trapped on that light fixture. He was crushed at having left 621, but couldn't bring himself to go back just to feel out-of-place again. At the same time, he felt just as misplaced here. The only thing keeping him here was the thought of what 625 and the red-headed girl had told him.

_Nobody gets left behind._

_If you want._

But he just couldn't imagine how it could be that simple, not after all he'd done to them. The others, he'd been told, had their own 'old selves,' but how could any of them be as terrible as the 627 who went along with several brainwashing schemes? And surely, nobody could've stooped lower than the slobbering, cackling monster with nothing on his mind but the word 'evil.'

_"Suddenly, I'm not half the man I used to be._

_"There's a shadow hanging over me._

_"Oh, yesterday came suddenly."_

627 started to envy that old monster. Yes, he was vile, cruel, and generally disgusting, but he didn't have these kinds of thoughts gnawing at his brain every waking moment. He hadn't betrayed anyone who went to great lengths to rescue him, and he wasn't trapped between two worlds, only half-belonging to each. He was free. That was all 627 wanted, but he knew he could never go back to being that old monster, not after all he'd been through.

Still, he longed for yesterday.

**VI**

Slushy watched as 627 looked at his banana split. Anyone who couldn't bring themselves to eat ice cream was either miserable or on a diet. (Though Slushy found that one could sometimes lead to the other).

He was silent for a while, hoping that the exact words to cheer 627 up would just pop into his brain, but they never did.

627 broke the silence. "What's it like for you around here? You don't stay here all the time, do you?"

Slushy laughed. "Naga. Like going to movies, surfing, circus. Also taekwondo lessons."

"Taekwondo?"

"Ih." Slushy demonstrated a quick combo; left straight punch, right hook, left uppercut, right back kick.

627 only looked more confused. "I thought the whole idea was that you wouldn't need to fight here."

Slushy shrugged. "Meega do taekwondo for fun."

"You fight for fun?"

Slushy rubbed his icy head. "Naga. Isa like...Dancing."

627 looked down at his banana split again. He brought himself to eat a spoonful, even though the cream was beginning to melt.

"I don't quite understand...But that goes for anything with me." The very faintest smile flickered on his face.

"Mmm...That's really good. Thank you."

Slushy beamed. "See? Meega great at making ice cream. All cousins great at things we never think of. Even youga."

"Cousins?"

Slushy nodded. "Ohana. Lilo says ohana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind."

627 had his longest silence yet. Slushy didn't mind so much this time since he managed a few more bites of his banana split.

"Do you know where Jumba is?" He finally asked. "I think I should talk to him. He built me, after all."

"Ih." Slushy tore a page from his notepad, jotted down some coordinates, and gave it took 627.

"Last transmission, he say he near Mars. Naga far with ship or pod. Just mind asteroids."

"Thanks." 627 finished his banana split, and the smile ran away from his face.

"I'm sorry. I don't have anything to give you for this."

"Naga worry. Isa gift."

627 managed another smile. "Well, thanks very much. It was delicious."

"Very welcome."

"And...Thanks for...You know."

"Ih. Meega know."

627 turned to leave. Slushy called "Aloha," after him, and he turned back around.

"I thought that meant 'hello,'" he said.

"Can be both."

627 considered this for a while. Slushy had never seen anyone so confused. Even he hadn't felt so lost in his early days as an ice cream man. He could feel how close 627 was, barely a claw's length away.

"Aloha," 627 finally said.

"Come again anytime." Slushy really hoped that he would.

**VII**

The pod was colder than 627 had left it. He was surprised by how warm the planet was, even in the shady forest clearing where he'd hidden his pod. He hadn't thought much about it since 621 had improved him, and not at all before that, but he liked the warmth. Enough that he felt a pit in his chest when he left it to enter his pod, as if something had been ripped out of him.

It was an awful feeling. Awful and familiar.

He looked at the napkin Slushy had given him, punching the written coordinates into the pod's computer. As the autopilot took him away, trading the luscious greenery for blue then white then starry blackness, he noticed another set of numbers on the napkin, followed by the letters _'FM.'_

_I'll ask them to play it again for you. -Slushy._

627 turned to the ship's radio, hastily adjusting the frequency as if it were an essential ship function. Slushy might have given him a map to some ancient, elusive treasure.

Perhaps he had.

_"And now,"_ a deep, chipper voice crackled through the pod's speakers. _"By popular demand, we bring you, once again, David Bowie's_ Life on Mars."

A long, lonely note preceded another voice. This one, haunting and alien, came with the passing stars, blending with them as if the space itself were singing to him.

_"It's a god-awful small affair,_

_"To the girl with the mousey hair,  
_   
_"But her mummy is yelling no,  
_   
_"And her daddy has told her to go."_

627 reclined in his seat, taking in the sounds and the stars. He forgot the pod and even himself. There was nothing but space. Nothing but nothing.

_"But her friend is nowhere to be seen,  
_   
_"As she walks through her sunken dream,  
_   
_"To the seat with the clearest view,  
_   
_"And she's hooked to the silver screen."_

The stars began to move through the darkness, leaving behind misty trails like tears.

_"But the film is a saddening bore,  
_   
_"For she's lived it ten times or more,  
_   
_"She could spit in the eyes of fools,  
_   
_"As they ask her to focus on…"_

They danced, and as they danced, they took on shapes. 627 recognized them, but he couldn't name them. He hadn't learned their new names yet, but he'd already forgotten their numbers. He saw the shapeshifter, the elastic acrobat, the long-snouted detective, the red-haired girl with her bat, the singer with the supersonic voice. And he saw his immediate predecessor. They were all out there, dancing in the darkness despite their namelessness.

No. They weren't nameless. He was.

_"Sailors,  
_   
_"Fighting in the dance hall,  
_   
_"Oh man,  
_   
_"Look at those cavemen go,  
_   
_"It's the freakiest show."_

They offered their hands to him. He reached. He wanted to join them. He needed to join them.

His claws touched the glass.

_"Take a look at the lawman,  
_   
_"Beating up the wrong guy,  
_   
_"Oh man,  
_   
_"Wonder if he'll ever know,  
_   
_"He's in the best-selling show."_

He needed to join them, but he couldn't leave his pod. He was trapped. Why were they free, why was the monster free, while he was trapped?

Why?

He shut his eyes and listened to that strange voice. He listened, completely understanding its nonsense. He listened as it, from whatever time or planet or galaxy it came from, plucked his thoughts from his head and transformed them. It returned them as a question that had nothing and everything to do with him, as nonsensical beauty.

_"Is there life on Mars?"_

**VIII**

It was chilly outside Jumba's ship. The sun seemed small enough for 627 to hold in his fist.

The ship itself was smaller than most of the buildings 627 had seen on Earth. There was a small platform before the entrance. When he stepped on it, several cameras whirred in his direction. Somehow, 627 could feel them blinking in surprise. The door rose for him, and he stepped into the darkness.

The interior was warm. The hallway was dark, but there was a light at the end. When he reached it, he found a room which seemed to have computer screens for walls. In the corner was a chamber like the one his new self had emerged from. The centerpiece was a workbench surrounded by metal stools and cluttered with pieces from consoles, blasters, and other machines 627 couldn't even identify. One piece of equipment stood out; it was nowhere near as advanced as the others. It was a little brown box with a black cone protruding from it. A voice came out of the cone; of course, it was singing. 627 found he just couldn't escape music lately, but as he listened, he didn't mind at all.

_All the times that I cried,_

_Keeping all the things I knew inside._

_It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it._

_If they were right, I'd agree,_

_But it's them they know, not me._

_Now there's a way, and I know that I have to go away._

And, of course, a certain portly, four-eyed scientist was already waiting for him.

"What a surprise seeing you, little one."

Stale memories of Jumba rushed through 627's mind. Most of them were from behind glass, but in none did Jumba speak directly to him. Another strange new feeling.

"Hello," 627 said feebly.

Jumba raised two eyebrows. "Curious. Last time, all you were saying was-"

"I know."

"Who is it, Jumba?" A dainty voice called out. A green, three-legged, one-eyed beanpole of a creature stepped in from the next room, wearing a pink apron and holding a wooden spoon.

His name eluded 627, who realized that he'd never learned it to begin with.

"I only cooked enough for two, but I can make some more if-_WAUGH!" _The green creature fumbled with his spoon before aiming it at 627 as if it were a blaster.

_"W-W-W-What's he d-d-d-doing here?!"_

"Come now, Pleakley," Jumba scolded. "You should be knowing we do not threaten guests with spoons. Why don't you be making some tea? 627 has had long journey."

Pleakley had a bewildered look in his eye like he'd been accused of taking candy from children. He looked at Jumba, then 627, Jumba again, 627 again, before returning to the kitchen.

"I suspect you have long story to tell me," Jumba said, clearing some space on the workbench.

"Please, tell me everything. I am shivering with curiosity."

627 filled Jumba in on every moment since his reprogramming. The recording of 624's song, why 621 had reprogrammed him, leaving him and 021, the songs stuck in his head, how trapped he felt, and how he missed the freedom of his monstrous old self. By the time he was done, Pleakley had tiptoed his way in and set a tray of tea and biscuits between 627 and Jumba.

"Thanks, Pleakley," 627 said. It did a little to stop Pleakley's shivering as he left again.

627 supposed he still had a ways to go.

"Interesting," Jumba muttered between sips of tea. "Very interesting...So why do you come so far to see Jumba?"

627 shrugged, looking down at his tea. His milky reflection frowned back at him.

"Who'd know me better?"

Jumba put his tea down. "Yes, I make you. I make all Experiments, but this does not mean I am knowing everything about them."

He placed a large hand on 627's shoulder. The crimson Experiment used to think he was tall, but now he realized just how small he really was.

"But if you want to know what I think, then I think 621 has given you wonderful gift."

627 avoided Jumba's four eyes. "It doesn't feel like a gift."

"It can. This is beautiful thing about this gift; it can be whatever you choose. It is not for 621, or 021, or Lilo, or Stitch, or even me to choose what it is. Only you."

627 looked up again. Jumba was wiping his eyes.

"Lesson I have been learning since leaving; Experiments are no longer my creations. I design weapons, soldiers, troublemakers. One day, each of my weapons, soldiers, and troublemakers meet little girl named Lilo, who give them this gift. Gift of becoming their own designs. And these new designs are far greater successes than anything I could ever do...And failure I never stop kicking self over is what I do to you. Making you a one-word-repeating beast with no way of making own design. Now 621 has given you gift I should have given you, all of you, from beginning."

Jumba managed a fragile, quivering smile.

"You are not 627 anymore, not since you step out of reprogramming chamber. And you are not what 621 says, or what I say, or what anyone says. You are your own creation. You can help 621 and 021 cause destruction, or go surfing with Lilo and Stitch on Earth, or start mangyloid farm on Neptune like Jumba's great-uncle. Anything you want, it is yours to create. _That _is the gift 621 has given you."

Jumba's four eyes glowed. In neither his old or new form did 627 ever see any eyes like those.

"I'm sorry I didn't give it to you much sooner."

627 put down his tea, hopped down from his stool, and hugged Jumba with all six arms. Jumba wrapped him in his massive arms, holding him like a teddy bear. 627 felt warmer than even the Hawaiian sun could make him feel.

He was about to tell Jumba that he forgave him.

"Thank you, little one," Jumba whispered.

But he realized he didn't have to.

He was even closer than before. He was hovering right above what he had been looking for. All that was left to do was land.

**IX**

He had faced a telepathic shapeshifter, a giant alien shark, and the dark, infinite abyss of space. But nothing had ever scared him like this door did.

He knew it was foolish. He'd already done so much to ensure that this was the onlything to do. But despite it all, he couldn't bear the thought of the people behind that door answering and still seeing the monstrous 627. So far, as hard as it had been, he'd always been able to figure out what to do next. But if he was wrong about this, he had no idea he could do. What he _would _do.

He heard 624's voice, bringing a soft melody through the door as if to answer a question 627 hadn't thought to ask.

_"Oh, Daniel, my brother. You are older than me._

_"Do you still feel the pain of the scars that won't heal?_

_"Your eyes have died, but you see more than I._

_"Daniel, you're a star in the face of the sky."_

627 didn't know what it meant, but somehow, he knew that it was for him.

He knocked, then waited for an eternity.

626-No, _Stitch-_answered the door, already wearing a radiant smile. 627 waited for it to fade, for the moment when he went from visitor to intruder, but it never happened. The smile was for him.

"A-Aloha," 627 stammered.

"Aloha, cousin," Stitch replied.

Another new feeling overcame 627; it was in his eyes.

He blinked and found himself in Stitch's arms. He clamped his flooding eyes shut as he felt more and more arms around him. He couldn't see them, but he knew who they were. He hadn't realized just how much he needed them.

Later, once his eyes were out of tears, he would ask them all for their help. He'd ask if they could find 621 and 021 and give them the gift they needed just as much as he did. And they would agree as quickly as if he'd asked to borrow some sugar.

It would all happen, but for now, 627 was just happy to know.

There was life on Mars.


	10. Episode 9: Stairway to Heaven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stitch and his cousins have to work together to save someone.
> 
> Songs Featured:  
*"Stairway to Heaven" - Led Zeppelin  
*"Don't Let the Sun Go Down On Me" - Elton John

**Episode 9: ** _ **Stairway to Heaven** _

**I**

_"That useless, ungrateful, traitorous little trog!" _021 yelled even louder than the metal wall she punched an elbow-deep dent into.

"Calm down, 021," 621 said, keeping a hand on the blaster at his hip. He only intended to use it as a bluff if he had to. He hoped that would be the worst he'd have to do.

"Don't tell me to calm down," 021 snapped, towering over 621.

That made him feel small. He wished she hadn't done that. Bad things happened to people who made him feel small, but he didn't want anything bad to happen to 021.

"I told you not to reprogram him!" 021 continued. "I told you it'd be easier to keep him the way he was!"

"I thought we could show 626 and the others that fulfilling our programming can be a choice," 621 retorted.

"Well, we got the opposite! Now 627's probably leading them to us, and _i_t'_s_ a_l_l _y_o_u_r _f_a_u_l_t_!" 021's voice crackled like a malfunctioning radio. Her eyes flashed a slimy green before she clamped her hands over them.

"What's wrong?!" 621's hands darted to her shoulders.

_"_Nothing!"

"No, something."

021 kept her eyes hidden as if she were ashamed of them.

"021," 621 began with a tone of strict kindness. "You helped me when I was alone. You found my pod, got me back into the universe, doing what I should be doing. Please. Let me help you now."

021 opened her eyes; they were still green. She blinked until they were purple again.

"I don't need any help," she growled, storming off. "You should get ready. We'll have company soon."

621 watched her go. He had no idea what those green eyes could mean. He didn't know if there was even anything he could do to help.

And, as crushing as it was to admit, he couldn't imagine why 627 would come back. If he'd left, it was because there was nothing for him here. He was probably happy to leave it all behind.

Just like all the others.

**II**

"I'm sorry I threw a barn at you."

"Is okay."

"And I'm sorry I electrocuted you."

"Is okay."

"And I'm sorry I used you as a trampoline."

Stitch held 627's hand, offering him a smile. "Is okay."

627 looked around the ship. He had a lot of names to learn and numbers to un-learn.

He started with the pilots; Bonnie, Clyde, and Cobra Bubbles.

"Should I be asking where you two got this ship?" Bubbles asked, standing behind Bonnie's seat as she steered.

"Hey, what're you insinuatin'?" Bonnie retorted. "We bought this with hard-earned cash."

"That we stole," Clyde added.

"Yeah...But if we _didn't _have this, we couldn't do this job, so if ya ask me, I'd say the ends justify the means."

"I imagine a judge would view you two as stand-up comedians," Bubbles said.

627 continued through the passenger area, a circular room lined with chairs facing one another.

Finder and Houdini were trying out each other's hats.

Belle and Sample had these strange pads on their ears, bobbing their heads and moving their lips.

Slushy was teaching Dupe his left-right-left-back kick combo, though Dupe continually insisted on a cartwheel in place of a back kick.

Sparky, Spooky, Kixx, Nani, and David were playing a game involving cards and the frequent declaration of either "hit me" or "stay."

Elastico was teaching Felix how to do a backflip. When he finally got it right on the thirteenth or fourteenth time, he backflipped into a kiss.

Snooty sat on top of Victoria's red hair, watching her and Lilo's discussion.

"Scarlet?" Victoria suggested.

"No, that's a girl's name," Lilo said, shaking her head. "What about Akyroyd?"

"I don't know. What do you think, Snoots?" Victoria looked up at him. Snooty answered by sticking out his tongue.

Angel had been playing her guitar the whole trip. Now that 627 could finally listen to them, he found that he really enjoyed the stories they had to tell.

Angel played songs about a small-town girl in a lonely world, a starman waiting in the sky, and a rocket man who thought it was going to be a long, long time. The last one 627 believed was just Angel's way of saying that it would be a long trip.

Her next one began with a soft, somber strumming. Her thumb plucked each chord as if it were climbing stairs.

_"There's a lady who's sure,_

_"All that glitters is gold,_

_"And she's buying a stairway to heaven._

_"When she gets there, she knows,_

_"If the stores are all closed,_

_"With a word, she can get what she came for._

_"Ooooooh,_

_"And she's buying a stairway to heaven."_

One song, however, was branded onto 627's mind. It piped up in between each verse.

"Angel?" He'd almost said '624.' "I heard you playing a song when I knocked on your door..."

Angel beamed. She twisted some pegs on the head of her guitar, then played some more.

_"Daniel is traveling tonight on a plane._

_"I can see the red taillights heading for Spain,_

_"Oh, and I can see Daniel waving goodbye._

_"God, it looks like Daniel must be the clouds in my eyes._

_"Oh, darling, it looks like Daniel must be the clouds in my eyes."_

627 loved it. The melody soothed him, elated him, assured him that he'd made the right choice. But most of all, he really liked the sound of it.

He heard Stitch giggling.

"What?"

"Your feet."

627 hadn't realized that he'd been drumming his toes on the metal floor. They kept going as if to say, _what are you gonna do about it?_

"That's it!" Lilo snapped her fingers. Everyone looked at her.

"How about we call you Daniel? Like the song."

627 didn't even need to consider it. It had felt right from the moment he'd first heard it.

"Sounds perfect," Daniel said. He had that feeling in his eyes again.

Everyone was smiling at him now. Slushy's seemed brightest of all.

Daniel knew he'd never be able to thank them enough, but he was still going to try his hardest. He'd start with 621 and 021. He knew that they needed this gift just as much as he did. He only hoped that they would accept it.

**III**

621 steadied his breathing. As nervous as he was, he was doing much better than 021, who breathed like a ferocious manglyoid preparing to charge. He hated seeing her like this. She'd always been angry, but so had he. This was something else entirely.

He thought he'd be angry now as he watched the security feed of the ship's airlock, waiting for 627 to arrive. Instead, he only felt disappointed, but not in 627.

Finally, he saw that crimson fur once more. He entered the airlock, followed by fourteen other Experiments. From how 021 had been talking about them, 621 expected them to barge in, claws and teeth bared and ready to tear the ship to bits. Instead, they waited for 621 to open the airlock for them, allowing them to step from their ship to his as if they were friendly neighbors.

621 pressed the intercom button.

"You two there?" 627 asked.

"You've got some nerve," 021 growled. "After we bent over backward to make you what you are now, this is how you repay us? Leading our enemies right to our door?"

"They're not your enemies," 627 responded. "They're here because they want to help you, and so do I."

"You _were _helping us," 021 spat. "That's what you're _supposed _to do. That's what we're _all _supposed to do. Didn't any of you _get _that? Screwing around on Earth with your lighthouses, your lost-and-found, your dancing; all your gifts are just going to waste. Jumba gave us the chance to make a _real _difference in the universe, to be remembered by entire planets. I just can't understand why you would all squander it."

"Won't you please excuse my frankness," 627 spoke up. "But it's not my cup of tea."

627's allies smiled at him.

021's eyes narrowed. "Is that from some of that 'music' you're all so obsessed with?"

"It means more than you think, 021. It all does. When you woke me up, I thought you were right. I thought fulfilling our programming was the only thing to do. But my cousins showed me that we don't have to do what Jumba built us to do. We're our own creations. Now that I realize that, I feel like I'm really more than the mindless monster you two saved me from. But it was you who gave me this gift in the first place, so I want to give you that gift now...If you want."

621 sighed. "I don't know...We've come so far. To stop now..."

"It's scary," 627 said. "I know. It was scary for me, too. It was scary for all of us. But I know you can do it, 621. It might be hard, but reprogramming me was hard, too, wasn't it? You can do anything you put your mind to, 621...And I'll be there to help you if you need me. Both of you."

Something happened in 621's head. All thoughts of finding the Grand Councilwoman, destroying the Federation from the inside, finally doing what he'd been designed for, vanished. He didn't care about them anymore. It seemed he'd never cared about them at all. He looked at 627, smiling at him from the massive computer screen. That was all there was to him.

He turned to 021. She'd turned away, her purple-clawed hand over her eyes.

"I've spent my whole life on this..." She whimpered. "This is all I am. I can't just throw it all out now..."

621 reached for her shoulder.

She seized his arm. Her eyes were green again.

"I _d_o_n_'t _h_a_v_e _t_i_m_e _t_o!"

With that, she slammed a fist on the airlock eject button.

**IV**

_Ground Control to Major Tom._

_Your circuit's dead. There's something wrong._

_Can you hear me, Major Tom?_

_Can you hear me, Major Tom?_

_Can you hear me, Major Tom?_

_Can you-_

Daniel had been worried it might go badly, but he didn't think that he and his cousins would be floating in the icy void of space.

The ship with Lilo, Snooty, and the other Earthlings on board was still docked alongside 021 and 621's. It was a small, long vehicle, like a red arrow shooting through space, alongside a black behemoth that could swallow it whole.

Before Daniel could even wave to Lilo for help, 021's ship, with Lilo's in tow, was speeding into the darkness.

Daniel's mind exploded with thoughts of his trapped ohana, of 621, of the way 021's voice had crackled. He envisioned it all knowing he and his cousins would suffocate in this empty darkness before seeing any of it through.

It occurred to him that he didn't know how long an Experiment could survive in space.

Then Bonnie felt a lightbulb turn on in her head.

She whistled for her cousins' attention, but she made only silence. She rolled her eyes, then waved her arms, hoping the others would notice her quickly. Fortunately, they did, and Bonnie began demonstrating her master plan.

First, she pointed her foot at Houdini, who covered her face, expecting a kick. Peeking between her fingers, the magician found that the foot wasn't hostile. She reached out and took hold of Bonnie's ankle, moving carefully in case it made any more sudden movements.

Next, Bonnie reached up and grabbed Sparky's ankle. Feeling confused looks from all around her, especially Sparky, Bonnie mimed out the rest of her plan. She made a whooshing motion with her hand, pointing at Sparky and then at the rest of her cousins.

Confusion turned to eagerness, much to Bonnie's relief.

Seconds later, Sparky, Bonnie, Houdini, Finder, Dupe, Slushy, Sample, Belle, Spooky, Kixx, Clyde, Elastico, Felix, Angel, Stitch, and Daniel formed a chain, each of them holding the cousin in front of them by the ankle. (Spooky's watery form coiled around Belle's foot and Kixx's fist).

Sparky gave a thumbs-up, and his cousins returned it. Then, like a shooting star, he took off after the ships. The chain's speed warmed the chill of deep space; Dupe and Sample almost didn't notice how cold they felt touching Slushy.

Finder and Houdini clenched their hats in their teeth. Even if they got wrinkled, they knew it was easier to buy new hats than to buy new Finders and Houdinis.

Belle couldn't help but scream. To her relief, nothing came out of her mouth.

Felix's heart stumbled when his claws slipped ever so slightly off Elastico's ankle. The acrobat's foot stretched around his hand like a tether. Elastico sent a wink back to Felix, whose heart stumbled again in another direction.

Angel's left hand was even tighter around the neck of her guitar than her right was around Felix's ankle. She smiled back at Stitch, who smiled at her in return. He was squeezing Angel's ankle so tightly that her foot had gone numb, but she didn't care. If she had to choose two things between Stitch, her guitar, and her foot, then it was no contest.

As the wind barraged his face, Daniel clutched Stitch's ankle even tighter. He was afraid he was going to hurt him. But when Stitch looked back to smile at him, his fear vanished.

It was a strange feeling, being trusted by someone who he'd been fighting barely a month ago. Even so, Daniel was determined not to squander this newfound trust. He would prove himself worthy of it no matter the cost.

Seconds later, the ships returned to view, joined by one other. It was more enormous than either of them, like a great silver whale swimming through space.

Stitch glanced back at Daniel with a worried look that didn't suit his face. They couldn't speak, but Daniel could tell that his cousin had seen this ship before. He could even guess who was on board.

Sparky towed his cousins towards their red ship. Peering through the windows, they found no sign of the rest of their ohana. Only a hole ripped through the wall, leading into 021's ship.

**V**

"I think you've got this backward, 621," 021 said in a crackling growl.

"No," 621 retorted. "I'm finally getting it the right way around. Get away from them."

021 complied, her eyes flickering between purple and green as she stepped away from the hole she'd just ripped between the two ships.

621 saw the Earthlings and 277 through the hole. He expected to find a huddle of frightened, shivering creatures, but instead found them standing tall despite the fear he could see in their eyes. (Perhaps that was why the one in the uniform wore glasses). Somehow, 621 knew they were thinking the same thing about him.

"Can any of you drive a ship?" He asked them.

They looked between one another. 621 expected the big one in the uniform to answer, but instead, the tall, dark-haired one did.

"I rode shotgun with Jumba a few times," she said. "I always paid attention to the controls just in case."

"Good enough," 621 replied. "Further down this hall, first room on the left. Take us back the way we came, and we'll save the others. 021 and I will be along in a bit."

"Yes, sir," the shorter dark-haired one saluted.

The group ran off. 021 made to pursue them, and 621 fired a plasma bolt at her feet. The resulting green puddle bubbled millimeters away from the tips of her toe-claws.

021 glared with green eyes glowing like a light in fog.

"Please," she said. "I know how good a shot you are. You won't shoot me."

"I don't want to," 621 responded.

"And I don't want to give up when I'm so close, so I guess we're stuck, aren't we?" Her voice came out as if from the other end of a broken communicator.

"It's not giving up. It's finding a better way."

"Come on. I thought you were clever."

"So did I. That's what I was programmed to be; the schemer, the strategist, the mastermind. I lost myself in all of it, hoping that it'd make me happy, or at least make me forget how unhappy I was. All this time, I thought our way wasn't working because we didn't have the right Experiments, the right resources, the right plan. I'm sorry, 021, but our way _just. Doesn't. Work."_

021 opened her mouth to respond, but she only coughed out gargled static. She clutched her head. 621 could see her sweating.

"I _t_h_o_u_g_h_t _I _c_o_u_l_d _t_r_u_st _y_o_u..." She whimpered.

"You _can," _621 urged. "I want to _help _you. That hasn't changed. I can figure out what's wrong with you. I can fix it if you'll just-"

021 moved in a way he'd never seen before. She charged at him on all fours, roaring with jaws throwing spit and static.

He almost shot her, but he couldn't do it. Even in this animalistic shell, he couldn't shoot his friend.

His friend, however, seemed capable of strangling him. Her claws snapped around his throat. He realized just how huge she was, and just how small he was.

Bad things happened to people who made him feel small.

A roaring wind suddenly filled the hall. 621 fell up towards a hole swallowing him into the cold stars outside. Before he could meet them, he landed in the warm embrace of six red-furred arms.

Behind Daniel, the other Experiments climbed in through the hole to escape the winds of space. For just a moment, 621 looked at Daniel's smiling face, and his fear and his loneliness faded away.

His relief was short-lived as he found 021 lunging at him again in midair. Already her spit sprayed in his face, and her crackling roar burned his ears.

He still couldn't shoot her, but somebody else could. A cool blue beam of energy struck 021 in midair. 621 followed the beam to its source, a panicking Dupe.

Slushy blew a layer of ice over the hole, sealing it and halting the ravenous wind. The metal floor screamed as a horde of Experiment feet landed on it.

The Experiments stood back-to-back, facing opposition on both sides. On one end, 021. On the other, also 021. They were both standing upright rather than their previous animalistic stance. 621 also noticed that her eyes were back to flickering between colors and not stuck in green.

"Good thinking, 344," 621 patted Dupe on the shoulder. "Cloning her didn't just halve her strength, it halved this glitch she's got, as well. Now we have more time to help her."

"Uh, ih," Dupe nodded hesitantly. "Just like meega plan."

"Okay, everyone," 621 ordered. "Don't hurt her! We just need to incapacitate her! Then we can find a way to help her!"

"Youga got it, cousin," Stitch chirped.

The two 021s charged. Even though each one was only half as strong, 621 knew it wasn't going to be any easier.

**VI**

021 was surrounded, but that wasn't her biggest concern. She was more irritated by the universe shifting back and forth from a single shade of green. When it happened, her ears rang with screeching static.

How typical of them all to gang up on her while she was at a disadvantage. Even knowing how strong she was, she knew she'd need a little help to get through this. She'd need a weapon. One of the other Experiments should do nicely.

She reached into the green for what she thought was Dupe, but in mid-lunge turned out to be Slushy.

"Hold still," she growled as she swiped again and again.

Slushy dodged each one with a swift duck or slide that chilled the air around him.

021 started swiping at Finder and Bonnie as well, hoping they'd be easier targets, but they were just as slippery.

"Okay, now it's our turn!" Bonnie pounced on 021's extended arm, flipping over her head.

021 went to grab her, only to find Finder's hat slapped over her eyes. She tore it off immediately with an enraged grunt, but it was all the time Slushy needed to freeze the floor beneath her feet. She slipped right into an icy reverse-roundhouse kick.

"Anger never wins," Slushy said with masterful composure, although 021 could barely make it out through the static.

She stumbled into the path of Clyde's metal fist. She brought a palm up, ready to catch it, just like last time. She'd woken up today knowing she was going to catch this punch.

She was given a break from the static to listen to the whistling birds, the running water, and a faint but distinct voice coming from somewhere nearby.

_Are you okay, Annie?_

She caught the punch, but she didn't stop it. The back of her hand was pushed into her nose. It hurt. A lot. She spun as she stumbled, losing her position in the green.

When she regained her footing, she reached out again for what looked like Sparky. She aimed for the neck, but when her vision's color was restored, she found that she'd caught Sparky's ankle in mid-takeoff.

She could've sworn she was faster than that. Whatever; as long as she could club the others with the pesky electrokinetic, it'd work.

She could hear rain tapping on the windows.

What rain? What windows?

Oh, forget it.

She looked back, wondering if she should hit Clyde or Slushy first. She saw them both, along with the others, several feet below her.

"Huh. Youga lose weight?" Sparky asked.

"You annoying little-" 021 reached up with her other hand, hoping to throw him to the ground. Before she could, she was struck with a surge of electricity.

It hurt, but she didn't remember it hurting this much. But as painful as it was, she wouldn't let Sparky reach the generator.

"You think..." She growled. "A little pain...S...Sc..."

"Yeah, yeah," Sparky said, barely audible over the static.

"Meega just gonna..." He plucked her claws, one-by-one, off his ankle.

She told her fingers to get back to work, but they just wouldn't respond. The universe went too green to see; she couldn't even distinguish outlines. She felt herself drop and then felt nothing for at least six seconds. She was in her own personal green purgatory.

She threw a punch the moment she returned to the universe. To her delight, it landed right on Kixx's nose. She froze, not because of any green in her eyes, but because she simply couldn't believe it. She'd dreamed of punching Kixx's smug face ever since their arm-wrestling days. The thought of swiping that showboating grin from him had kept her going all these years, and now she'd done it with still a little time left.

Kixx wiggled his nose as if a fly had landed on it.

_"Oh, come on!" _021 roared, going for another blow.

Kixx had woken up today knowing he would catch this one.

021 realized that Kixx had caught her during her fall. She was on her feet, but Kixx's lower arms were still around her torso.

She braced herself for the excruciating counterattack, but it didn't come.

"Hey, before ya try that again, 021," Kixx began, his hold on 021's fist relaxing. He looked right into her eyes as if he were examining his reflection in a mirror.

"I wanted to apologize to ya. That's why I came out here. I was a real trog to all my cousins, but I was worst to you. I picked fights with ya to make myself feel strong, but I never thought about how weak it made _you _feel. Now I know it was _me _bein' weak. I know it ain't much after all this time, but if you'll let me, I'd like to help _you _feel strong now."

As 021 listened, she expected to feel some kind of long-overdue satisfaction. Instead, she felt terrified. If Kixx repented how he'd made her feel, then all the resentment she'd built up towards him would be meaningless. What could she possibly replace it with?

No. He must be lying. It must be a ploy to get her to surrender. Of course, there was no change. There could never be any change.

She convinced herself of it. Her fear became relief, and the universe became green again.

She headbutted Kixx right on the bridge of his nose, wrenching herself free. She reached behind her to grab her chair and smack Kixx over the head with it.

There was no chair. Of course there wasn't. What was she thinking?

In her moment of befuddlement, Stitch seized her arm.

"Get off!" 021 went to hit Stitch with her free fist, but Kixx grabbed it.

She tried to hit them both with her lower hands, but they were caught as well.

"Stitch had glitch once, too," Stitch said. "Meega know how to fix, but youga need to let us help."

_"You wanna help me?!" _021 spat. _"Then you'll get your Earthling friends to turn us back around and help me storm the Councilwoman's ship!"_

"As your strategist," 621 began, standing near 021 as if unafraid that she might break free.

"I can assure you that carrying on by yourself like this will lead to nothing."

_"Nothing's all I've got anyway!" _021 yelled. She felt everyone around her freeze where they were. Even their breathing seemed to pause.

_"I've been trying my whole life to succeed at the one thing I was built to do! And ever since I first felt this glitch inside me, I knew my time_

**VII**

_was almost up! And I still haven't done it! If I die like this, then I'm nothing! Just the botched-up first attempt before the final draft! That's why I have to go for the Councilwoman! I don't have time to work my way up anymore! I've got to aim for the top or go out trying! That's all I've got!"_

There was no sound but 021's echo. Her face was boiling as sweat and tears mingled on her cheeks. She kept Daniel pinned firmly under her foot, while her fist tightened as she held Angel upside-down by the ankle, her guitar held close to her as if it might fly away. Their allies surrounded 021 like statues, waiting for only the most crucial moment to strike.

They were all green.

"You wouldn't understand," her sigh degraded into a whimper.

Several seconds of flickering green passed before Angel finally spoke.

"Ih. Meega understand..."

Then she sang.

_"There's a lady who's sure...All that glitters is gold..."_

Daniel finished, his tone filled with sad realization.

_"And she's buying a stairway to heaven..."_

As they sang, the universe kept its color, and 021's face cooled.

"Hey," Angel said, offering a smile. "Youga like Zep."

Something washed over 021. Her tirade's echo vanished entirely from her mind, which became more relaxed than it had ever been. She didn't think of the Councilwoman, or 621, or Kixx, or anything but the lady buying her stairway to...

Everything was green again.

_"Don't waste your breath," _021 cackled. _"621 reprogrammed him and me to be immune to your song!"_

She hurled Angel at the Experiments waiting for her command. Elastico caught her with a lasso-like arm and set her back on her feet.

_"Alright, you guys know what to do with her!"_

They all exchanged befuddled looks.

"Um...Make sure naga hurt?" Felix suggested. "Okitaka, Angie?"

"Ih, Felix," Angel nodded. "Youga?"

"Ih. Taka."

021 felt ice running up her spine. _"What?! _How did you all break out of your trances?! Why isn't the recording playing?!"

More befuddled looks.

"Your plan to control us with Angel's song has already come and gone, 021," Spooky said. "You're confusing past with present. A side-effect of your glitch, no doubt, which could be fixed if you would just stand down-"

_"I told you! I don't have time!"_ 021 stormed into the green, ready to teach the shapeshifter a lesson. Something seized her ankle. She was about to kick it when she felt that soothing wave wash over her again.

_"When she gets there, she knows,_

_"If the stores are all closed..."_

There was a pause. Daniel released her and ran to join the others. Already, the green was coming back.

_"With a word she can get what she came for," _Daniel finished after a quick racking of his brain.

021 enjoyed the peace while it lasted. Before long, the green was back, and the lady and her stairway were gone from her malfunctioning mind.

She let out a roar and charged at her opponents on all fours. She scanned her opponents, considering who to strike first, but couldn't find Spooky. She'd last seen him slithering under Houdini's cape.

021 wound up, hoping to knock over Daniel, Sample, and Belle with one fell swoop. In mid-swing, her arm was caught by a figure which seemed to pop into existence. It was a beast with yellow fur, purple eyes, and twice 021's height. Its roar was loud, sudden, and putrid enough to send her off her feet.

The fall seemed to take hours as she was lost in the green, and the roar became static.

When her senses finally returned, the first thing she heard was a mysterious yet soothing voice she didn't recognize.

_"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow,_

_"Don't be alarmed now._

_"It's just a spring clean for the May Queen._

_"Yes, there are two paths you can go by,_

_"But in the long run,_

_"There's still time to change the road you're on."_

Sample emerged from the green, playing the music from his speakerphone ears.

021 recognized him, yet was still filled with a brisk sensation of discovery. She clung to the lyrics, clung to their color, and to her escape from her fury and fear.

She felt rubber limbs ensnaring her and forgot her discovery.

She had just enough reach to swipe at Sample, but he was quick to dodge. She then reached behind her, grasping the elongated arm which Elastico had lassoed her with.

Elastico gulped.

021 yanked him towards her. He was camouflaged in the green, but she still managed to catch him by the throat. She thought she'd enjoy seeing him look scared for once in his irritating, happy-go-lucky life, but she couldn't make out his face through the green.

_"Hey! Let boojiboo go!"_

021 had never thought much of Felix. Least of all, she never imagined him, of all creatures in the galaxy, to land a hit on her jaw. It wasn't a hard hit; she barely felt a twinge. But within seconds, the twinge became an unbearable inferno of pain, like her jaw was about to fall off. She couldn't help it; she had to release Elastico to tend to her jaw.

"Taka, boojiboo."

To 021's relief, the pain stopped, but so did everything else. She couldn't feel her fists clench and couldn't hear herself breathing. The purgatory didn't last long, but when it ended, there was a suspicious silence.

"Ready when you are, Belle," Angel called.

Even at her fullest potential, 021 could never have dodged what came next.

_"AND AS WE WIND ON DOWN THE ROAD,_

_"OUR SHADOWS TALLER THAN OUR SOUL!"_

The green was blown away in a blast of melodic wind. 021's adhesive soles clung to the metal floor. The wind blew tears from her eyes.

_"THERE WALKS A LADY WE ALL KNOW,_

_"WHO SHINES WHITE LIGHT AND WANTS TO SHOW,_

_"HOW EVERYTHING STILL TURNS TO GOLD!"_

She was fixated on Belle. With all her strength, she stepped towards her, pushing against the sheer force of the torrent of her voice.

_"AND IF YOU LISTEN VERY HARD,_

_"THE TUNE WILL COME TO YOU AT LAST!"_

021 barely noticed the craters forming in the metal around her feet. She felt like she'd been walking up a steep staircase her entire life, and she was so close to the top. She was exhausted, but she just had to go a little higher.

_"WHEN ALL ARE ONE AND ONE IS ALL,_

_"TO BE A ROCK AND NOT TO ROLL!"_

She was there. She just had to reach up and touch that final step.

Her arm froze inches away from Belle. There was color, there was no static, but she couldn't feel anything.

Belle stopped singing. She offered 021 a look of concern, then reached for her outstretched hand.

_"I THINK YOU'VE GOT THIS BACKWARD YOU SEE I'VE FORGOTTEN IF THEY'RE GREEN OR THEY'RE BLUE THAT USELESS UNGRATEFUL TRAITOROUS LITTLE TROG THIS IS GROUND CONTROL TO MAJOR TOM THE BEST YOU CAN HOPE FOR IS A LITTLE CHAT WITH ME I ONLY WANT TO SEE YOU LAUGHING IN THE PURPLE RAIN YOU THINK A LITTLE PAIN SCARES ME ARE YOU OKAY ANNIE OF COURSE IT DIDN'T WORK YOU IDIOTS I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE BUT I WON'T DO THAT I'M RIGHT WHERE I BELONG ALREADY AND YOU LIGHT MY MORNING SKY WITH BURNING LOVE YEAH BUT SOME OF US AREN'T AS SUCCESSFUL AS...S_u_c_c_e_s_s_fu_l _a_s...a_s..."

The green overtook her. The universe was static. She managed to cling to only a few words.

_"...Dupe...Back together..."_

_"...Have...Chamber..."_

_"...On Earth...Too far...Never..."_

_"...One closer...Jumba..."_

_"...Change course...Doesn't...Much time..."_

_And she's buying a stairway to heaven._

**VIII**

_I can't light no more of your darkness._

_All my pictures seem to fade to black and white._

_I'm growing tired, and time stands still before me._

_Frozen here on the ladder of my life._

Lilo would've loved a visit to Jumba to involve catching up, sharing a meal, enjoying the music on his radio, and generally having a good time with her ohana. Instead, it involved hauling 021 onto the bed of Jumba's reprogramming chamber.

Nani told Lilo that she didn't have to watch, but Lilo wanted to. She couldn't leave her cousin in her time of need.

_It's much too late to save myself from falling._

621 and Jumba were hard at work on the computer hooked up to the chamber. Lilo didn't completely understand what they were doing. They seemed like they were playing a challenging video game, but Lilo knew it was much more important than that. There was something in 021 that they had to get out, like what happened to Stitch ages ago, but different.

_I took a chance and changed your way of life._

Lilo wasn't sure what she could do to help. She held 021's hand. She thought her purple claws were cool. She wasn't sure if 021 could feel her; she only looked at the ceiling with her flashing green eyes.

_But you misread my meaning when I met you._

She remembered what 021 had said to her the first time they met, about already being where she belonged. Lilo desperately hoped that her ohana could help her. She knew how terrible it felt to need help but be too afraid to ask for it.

_Closed the door and left me blinded by the light._

She felt the purple claws close around her hand. It was a weak grip, but Lilo was overjoyed for it.

_Don't let the sun go down on me._

She looked up at 621. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he typed.

"You can do it," she told him.

He looked at her, and she found that she was crying, too.

"You can do it," she repeated.

_Although I've searched myself, it's always someone else I see._

621's tear-stained face hardened. He nodded and typed more urgently than before.

_I'll just allow a fragment of your life to wander free._

Lilo turned back to 021, fixated on those flashing green eyes. She remembered how much it hurt to see them on Stitch. It hurt just as severely see them on 021, no matter what she'd said or done to Lilo or her ohana. Nobody deserved those eyes.

_But losing everything is like the sun going down on me._

Jumba and 621 finished typing. 021's green eyes shut. Lilo and her ohana waited for them to open again.

_And she's buying a stairway to heaven._


	11. Episode 10: The Times They Are A-Changin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two Experiments adjust to their new life.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"The Times They Are A-Changin'" - Bob Dylan  
*"Changes" - David Bowie  
*"Let It Be" - The Beatles  
*"Suspicious Minds" - Elvis Presley  
*"The River of Dreams" - Billy Joel

** Episode 10:  _ The Times They Are A-Changin' _ **

** I **

021 awoke to a universe of color. She didn't absorb where she was straight away; she was just relieved to not see any green.

Her mind and senses rebooted. It took a few minutes, but soon, she recognized the grey metal of the walls and ceiling of Jumba's lab and heard faint music coming from the next room. Memories flooded back to her, dragging her back into the pain of yesterday.

_ I've spent my whole life on this. This is all I am.  _

She remembered how close she'd come. Now she'd fallen so far behind that she wasn't even in the race anymore. Yesterday, when she'd only had so much time, the race had meant everything to her. But now that she had years, decades, perhaps even eternity ahead of her, she didn't care for it anymore. She felt crushed between the future she thought she'd never have and the past which didn't deserve it. 

She shut her eyes and cried. Her sobs were quiet and weak; she didn't have the energy for anything more. She didn't want to stay where she was but didn't think she deserved to leave.

Finally, she decided to start by sitting up. She opened her eyes and wiped tears from them. She found a small table at the foot of her bed, piled with envelopes and boxes of every color.

"Is wonderful to see you awake."

021 found Jumba approaching her bedside.

"I knew you would wake eventually, but still, I am relieved that you have now."

021 avoided his four eyes. She'd struggled to forgive him for outdating her with so many new super-strong Experiments, but now that he'd helped save her life, it didn't seem right to even look at him.

Jumba tried to sit down beside her, only to find that the bed was too small for him. Instead, he knelt to her level.

"I expect you have much to be thinking about," he said. 

021 pulled her knees close to her chest. She did have a lot to think about and a lot to say, but she had no idea how to say it. She breathed, organized her thoughts into the neatest stack she could make, and started with the question on the very top.

"Why...?" She asked, wiping away another tear. "After everything I've done to all of you...Why would you all still help me?"

"There is word they have on Earth," Jumba began. "Ohana, which means family, which means nobody is left behind or forgotten. Sometimes family does things which make us sad or angry, or we do these things to them because we are scared, upset, or confused. But this does not mean we just throw them away, or that they stop being our family. Each of your cousins felt not unlike what you are feeling now, and they always help one another become best version of self."

"Cousins?" 021 asked.

"Ah, yes. Is what they say on Earth. Everyone is connected, everyone is ohana, everyone is cousins."

021 considered this. She'd always thought the worst of people, even if she'd never met them. 621 had been the exception, mostly because he'd agreed to help her after she'd gotten him out of pod form. To do the opposite, to feel connected with everyone, confused and scared 021. But it was that belief which had saved her life. Perhaps, then, it wasn't really so confusing and scary.

"And there's something I wanted to say to you," Jumba added. "I feel this for all my Experiments, but I think you need to hear it most...I am sorry for what I did to you. I am sorry I did not help you make your own design. I am sorry I treated you like Experiment and not like cousin."

021 didn't know what to say, so she just hugged her creator.

"I've been angry for so long," she said. "I thought that was what I had to be...I know I don't have to be anymore, but I don't know what to be instead..."

"Well, this is not such bad thing," Jumba pulled away, wiping a tear from his creation's cheek.

"You have great adventure ahead of you, to make your own design, to be your creation and not Jumba's." 

He glanced at the boxes and envelopes at the foot of the bed.

"The others wanted to stay with you, but thought you should have time to decide what you want to do. Almost immediately, they send these to you. Perhaps you may start here."

021 looked at the boxes. "I think I will...Thank you, Jumba...Really."

Jumba smiled. "I am glad you are okay...I will make you something to eat. You have presents to open."

Once Jumba left, 021 got started, opening each box and envelope as carefully as possible. It was a strange feeling, not wanting to destroy something after a lifetime of destruction. It wasn't a bad feeling, though.

Each gift contained a note.

She found a strip of paper inviting her to something called  _ La Cirque de la Lune. _

_ Got you a front-row seat. Feel free to come see us backstage, too. We love visitors. Can't wait to see you. _

_ -Love, Elastico and Felix. _

A strange device, headset, and a case with a picture of four long-haired men wearing spacesuits and piercing expressions. Arcing black letters above them read,  _ Led Zeppelin. _

_ Thought you'd like to hear more of these guys, so we got you their greatest hits. Hope you enjoy them. You're always welcome to come jam with us. _

_ -Your friends, Belle and Sample. _

A box containing three different hats; a blue baseball cap, a brown fedora, and a wide-brimmed white sun hat.

_ We like our hats down here. Thought you might like to try one. You know where to find us. See you soon. _

_ -Bonnie, Clyde, Finder. _

A book entitled  _ Crossword Puzzles. _

_ Stop by the lighthouse for a few games sometime. I like a bit of company on rainy nights. _

_ -Your new friend, Sparky. _

A cooler containing boxes with labels like 'chocolate,' 'cookies and cream,' 'strawberry,' and 'mint.'

_ Didn't know what your favorite flavor was, so I got you a bunch. Stop by my stand sometime, and I can show you where I learn taekwondo. I think you'd like it a lot. _

_ -Wishing you a delicious day, Slushy. _

A can containing something called 'hot chocolate.'

_ This always helps us feel better. Hope it helps you feel better, too. _

_ Let us know how the stars look today. _

_ -Victoria and Snooty. _

A card reading  _ Muscle Bay Gym Membership. _

_ We should lift some weights and catch up. I could teach you some of my moves, and you could teach me some of yours. _

_ I meant everything I said back on the ship. I hope you can forgive me. I hope we can be strong together. _

_ See ya. _

_ -Kixx. _

A long stick with holes along one side and some kind of reed at the end. With it was a folded sheet of paper, showing various diagrams of the stick, each with different holes covered and labeled with letters,  _ A, B, C, D, F, G.  _ There was also a booklet of pages with the same letters listed in patterns. It was entitled,  _ Stairway to Heaven. _

_ We know you're not super into the electric guitar, so we thought you'd like to try a different kind of instrument. We saw this flute in the music shop and thought of you. We all have our powers, but there are a lot of other things we can do that still surprise us. We hope you'll be surprised, too. _

_ Music is a great way to help you feel happy, safe, or however you want to feel. We've got lots of music down here. We'd love to share it with you. _

_ -Lots of love from your cousins, Angel and Stitch. _

Lastly, there was a letter.

_ Dear 021, _

_ Don't worry; we'll find a name for you real soon.  _

_ I hope you enjoy all the gifts we've sent you. We're all super happy that your glitch is gone. I wanted to let you know that it's okay if you don't want to come to Earth yet, or if you don't want to come at all. Every cousin has one place where they truly belong, but nobody knows better than you where your own place is. Maybe it's here with us, maybe it's staying with Jumba, maybe it's on another planet. Whatever you decide, I just want you to know that your ohana forgives you and loves you. You always have a home with us. _

_ Until we meet again. _

_ -Lilo, Nani, David... _

The letter kept unfolding and unfolding like a paper scarf, revealing more and more signatures. 021 guessed that there were well over six hundred.

She moved the letter out of the path of her falling tears. She looked around at the collection of things she didn't deserve. It was agony.

She picked up the 'flute' which Stitch and Angel had sent her. She didn't deserve it, but perhaps that wasn't why they'd sent it to her.

The music on the radio changed. 021 listened.  _ Really  _ listened.

_ Come gather 'round people, wherever you roam, _

_ And admit that the waters around you have grown, _

_ And accept it that soon, you'll be drenched to the bone. _

She admitted it. She accepted it.

_ If your time to you is worth saving, _

_ Then you better start swimming, or you'll sink like a stone. _

021 still felt like she was sinking. She was at the very bottom. Now, there was only one place left to go.

She brought the flute to her lips and started playing.

She started swimming.

_ For the times, they are a-changin'. _

** II **

The hula school was almost immaculate, and it had only taken Daniel four hours. 

He didn't think he was as good at it as Felix, but he still did his best. It was a lot of work, but it was fun, too, largely thanks to the radio Felix had let him borrow.

_ Still don't know what I was waitin' for, _

_ And my time was runnin' wild, _

_ A million dead-end streets. _

_ Every time I thought I'd got it made, _

_ It seemed the taste was not so sweet.  _

_ So I turned myself to face me, _

_ But I've never caught a glimpse, _

_ How the others must see the faker. _

_ I'm much too fast to take that test. _

As Daniel finished scrubbing the last window, he swayed his hips, tapped his feet, and sang along. He just couldn't help himself.

_ "Ch-ch-ch-ch-change, _

_ "Turn and face the strange, _

_ "Ch-ch-changes. _

_ "Don't wanna be a richer man. _

_ "Ch-ch-ch-ch-change, _

_ "Turn and face the strange, _

_ "Ch-ch-changes. _

_ "Just gonna have to be a different man. _

_ "Time may change me, _

_ "But I can't trace time." _

"Seems like you're having fun."

Daniel turned to find Lilo and Felix admiring his handiwork.

"I suppose I am." Daniel quickly finished his work on the window, then stood back to take in the entirety of the polished school.

"Wow," Felix said. "Bootifa, Danny."

"Yeah, the place looks new," Lilo added.

"Thanks," Daniel replied, scratching behind his head. It had been a lot of work, but it felt good to know he'd done something that people would like.

"How's your day off been, Felix?"

"Real good, taka," Felix said. "Meega try taekwondo with Slushy. Now gonna get flowers for Elastico."

"I should join you guys for a lesson sometime."

"Sure. Always room for more."

"Wanna cross this off your list, Dan?" Lilo offered him a pen and paper.

"Sure." Daniel took them and crossed off the final item.

_ -Organize items at Finder's lost-and-found. _

_ -Wash Sample and Belle's jeep. _

_ -Polish equipment at Kixx's gym. _

_ -Do Felix's job for a day. _

Daniel couldn't believe he was done or that he was disappointed. He'd meant it all as an apology to his cousins, but it had ended up being the most fun he'd ever had. But he knew that it was only the beginning.

"And I've got something for you," Lilo added. "A 'welcome to our ohana' present." 

She gave him a book the size of a dinner plate. It was entitled,  _ Great Musicians of the Twentieth Century.  _ All over the cover were pictures of the most peculiar-looking people Daniel thought he'd ever see.

There was a man in white with sleek black hair which curved like the waves Daniel had seen beachgoers 'catching.' His grin curved in the same way. Daniel couldn't help but to try and mimic it.

Another man had a mustache and wore a yellow jacket. One arm gripped a mic stand while the other punched the air. Despite his skinniness, Daniel thought he seemed incredibly powerful.

There was one with his back facing Daniel. He wore a black jacket and a hat. His arms were outstretched as if to stop two charging armies.

One stared intensely at Daniel with a solemn expression from behind a round pair of glasses. Something about this face comforted Daniel.

"You seem to like music a lot," Lilo said. "So I thought you'd like to read about the people who make it."

"I'd love to," Daniel replied. He held his arms out, and Lilo instantly pulled him into a hug.

"Thank you, Lilo. For this and...For everything." 

Lilo squeezed him tight. She spoke softly. "I'm sorry we couldn't help you the first time."

"You helped me this time. That's all that matters to me."

They soon pulled away. Daniel turned to Felix, who was smiling expectantly.

"You said you were going to get flowers for Elastico?"

"Ih."

"...Could I come with you? I'd like to get flowers for somebody, too."

** III **

_ When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me, _

_ Speaking words of wisdom, let it be. _

621 heaved another shovelful of elephant droppings into the bucket.

It was hard work, not only because of the effort and time but also because of the smell. He didn't think there could be a worse smell in all the universe. 

"You poop too much," he said to the elephant, who faced the other end of the stable.

He received a dismissive honk in reply.

He took some comfort from the radio sitting on a nearby stool, and the encouraging words of the Beatles. (How beetles learned to sing, he didn't know).

_ And in my hour of darkness, she is standing right in front of me, _

_ Speaking words of wisdom, let it be. _

Finally, he finished his work. He thought he'd want to get away from the smell as soon as possible, but he wanted, even more, to listen to the music.

_ Let it be, let it be. _

_ Let it be, let it be. _

_ There will be an answer. _

_ Let it be. _

On the way out, he picked up his list from beside the radio and crossed off the final item.

_ -Watch Sparky's lighthouse for a night. _

_ -Clean Cobra's office from top-to-bottom. _

_ -Disinfect surfboards at Nani's rental shack. _

_ -Scoop for the circus. _

He wasn't sure how to feel about his completed checklist. He was happy that his repentant tour was done, but now he had no idea what to do next. He was used to strategizing all his actions. It was all he'd ever known. What else could he do?

He thought of the music. 

He decided to start by going to the main circus tent, then he could take it from there.

He found Houdini and Elastico observing an extraordinary setup. A target stood at one end of the pit. Beside it was a line of hoops on sticks, starting small near the target and getting wider and higher until they reached a platform near the roof of the tent. There, Kixx, with a quiver strapped to his back, aimed a bow-and-arrow.

"Deep breaths, Kixxy," Elastico called.

"Use both eyes," Houdini shouted.

Kixx loosed his arrow, which flew until it crashed into the top of one of the middle hoops.

"Son of a manglyoid," Kixx grunted.

621 glanced at the empty bleachers. Cobra Bubbles was there, looking at him with a stoic, sunglass-shrouded face that seemed to have been waiting for him forever.

Cobra barely moved, but 621 could tell that he was beckoning him. Best not to keep him waiting.

"Aloha." Cobra could make even the friendliest words terrifying.

"Aloha," 621 replied, sitting down beside Cobra. 

The top of his mohawk reached Cobra's elbow. Usually, bad things happened to people who made him feel small, but he decided he should make an exception.

Cobra reached into a plastic bag on the seat beside him, taking out a white rectangular box and two sticks, which he offered to 621.

"I've brought you some takeaway."

"Oh. You didn't have to--"

"Do I have to reflect some light at you?"

621 wasn't sure if she should laugh or scream. He decided he would just take the box and sticks.

"Thank you," he said.

"You did very well cleaning my office," Cobra said, opening a box of his own.

"The ceiling, especially. I feel as though I have my own personal Sistine Chapel."

"...Thanks." 621 opened his box and gazed inside. He was struck with a warm, gentle wind, carrying a symphony of scents. It did for his nose what the music had for his ears.

"Your responses aren't quite as theatrical as our last conversation," Cobra said after swallowing a mouthful of his 'takeaway.'

"I saw you as an enemy then," 621 responded. "Now, I don't want to."

"Neither do I. You may not believe this, but I never set out to become enemies with anyone. Unfortunately, I cannot always give people the benefit of the doubt which Lilo and others like her can."

621 didn't know how to respond to that.

"What I mean to say is..." Cobra added. "I'm pleased we don't have to be enemies."

"Me too," 621 replied. 

Using the sticks, he took a bite of the contents of his wonderfully-scented box. 

"I hope it's to your liking," Cobra said.

"It is...It  _ really  _ is. We never ate anything like this back at Jumba's lab." 621 only realized too late that his voice had been wandering into a higher pitch.

"It's called chop suey."

"Hm. Thuhts uh fuhnneh worr," 621 said with his mouth full of the rest of the chop suey. He swallowed before continuing.

"Chop suey..." It was a sound worthy of such a comforting taste and smell.

_ "Blitznak."  _ Kixx botched another shot.

"Maybe too many hoops?" Houdini asked.

"Target too small?" Elastico added.

"No, no, it's not that," Kixx called down. "Sorry, guys. I shouldn't talk like such a trog."

"Could I try?" 621 asked.

"Don't see why not," Kixx replied. "Ya probably got better aim than me, anyhow."

Elastico's arms acted as an elevator for 621. 

"Hey," he said to Kixx.

"Hey." Kixx handed him the bow and an arrow. "So, with this--"

"You just pull back on the string and release it to fire?"

"Uh, yeah," Kixx chuckled. "Figures you'd know all about this sharpshooter stuff."

621 took aim, lining up the bullseye with the center of every hoop. It was like trying to scratch an itch somewhere just out of his reach. Once he had it, he was frozen in a position both comfortable and agonizing.

He'd made difficult shots before, but only in fights or training. He'd never done it just for the sake of it, and certainly never with so many arbitrary obstacles. He thought staying on Earth would mean that he'd have to give up his old skills, but using them like this was surprisingly fun. Perhaps he didn't have to give up as much as he'd expected.

"You, uh..." Kixx said. "You heard from 021?"

"No," 621 answered, keeping his perfect shot aligned. "But I hope I will."

"Me, too...I don't know if she believed my apology. I really meant it, ya know? I just...It'd be great if we could bury the hatchet, but at the very least, I just want her to know that I really am sorry. I've tried all I could now, but it still doesn't seem like it was enough."

621 knew that 021 would be alright. The procedure had been a success. Even if she didn't awaken immediately, Jumba had assured him that she would when she was ready. But even so, he knew it wouldn't feel real until he saw her awake and alive. But what else could he do?

He thought of the music.

"It'll be alright," he said. "Just let it be."

He loosed his arrow. It soared through the hoops before landing in the bullseye as if the two were always meant to meet.

Houdini, Elastico, and even Cobra applauded.

Kixx patted 621 on the back. "Thanks, bud."

621 looked down at the bow. Its beckoning was stronger than even the most accurate and powerful blaster.

Elastico brought them both back down, congratulating 621 on his shot all the way. By the time they reached the ground, a few more visitors had entered the tent.

_ "Boojiboo!"  _ Elastico ran into Felix's arms, instantly entering a handstand on the cleaner's shoulders.

"Flowers for youga." Felix, looking straight up, held up a bouquet that seemed to contain every shade of every color there was.

"Aw. Taka." Elastico took the bouquet, balancing with only one hand on Felix's shoulder, and licked the bridge of his trunk.

Felix went pink. 621 found it strange, but it was a good kind of strange.

621 turned to greet Lilo and Daniel, the latter he found with a book under one arm and another bouquet, this one completely white, in the other.

"Hey," Daniel said.

"Hey," 621 replied.

"You, uh...You finished your list?"

"Yes, I did. You?"

"Yeah. All done."

They were silent for a while. 621 wondered why nobody else was stepping in to offer a new topic. He'd have to take the initiative.

"What're the flowers for?"

Daniel chuckled. "That same question was driving me nuts a few days ago...Um..."

He glanced at Lilo, who smiled and nodded.

"They're for you...They're white roses..." He gave them to 621.

"Oh." 621 took them. They smelled even better than the chop suey.

"They...They reminded me of your..." Daniel stroked an imaginary mohawk on his head.

"Thanks..." 621 internally scolded himself. In the past few days, he'd been finding it harder and harder to talk to Daniel. If Cobra thought he'd become less theatrical, Daniel must think that his brain was shrinking with each interaction they had.

621 wasn't even scared of Daniel. At least, he was confident that the heat he was feeling wasn't fear. It occurred to him that he must be as pink as Felix.

"Hey," Lilo chimed in. 621 couldn't thank her enough.

"We've still gotta come up with a name for you. Usually, an Experiment gets their name from something they like. I thought we could come up with one together."

621 was excited; he thought a name would be the final step to really belonging on this planet.

As for things he liked, there were many candidates. He looked at the flowers. He considered 'White Rose,' but it didn't quite suit him.

He turned to the bow, which he still held in one of his lower hands. 'Bow?' 'Bowie?' No, those seemed silly.

He remembered the song. Perhaps 'Mary?' Again, it just wasn't right for him.

He thought of the delicious 'takeaway' which Cobra had brought him. What was it called again?

"How about 'Chopsuey?'" He suggested.

"Like the dish?" Lilo asked.

"Yeah. Cobra and I had some just now...There's a lot of things I like about being here, about being with all of you. I want my new name to remind me of times like this. Times where I don't have to strategize, and I can just...Let it be."

"Then it's the perfect name for you," Lilo said. "Cousin Chopsuey."

Chopsuey had been right. Hearing a name instead of a number was just what he needed.

He felt exceedingly pink.

** IV **

Chopsuey didn't put the roses down all day, not even when he went backstage.

Around him, his cousins bustled about, preparing for their show. 

Slushy and Bonnie were rehearsing some kind of dance-fight which involved ducking each other's forehead-high kicks.

Houdini was deciding which pair of large, flamboyant glasses to wear, the ones shaped like flowers or the ones shaped like stars.

Sample was teaching Dupe how to do something called a 'moonwalk.' Chopsuey had walked on several moons, but he certainly never did it like that.

As he maneuvered through the crowd, he bumped into Daniel. They didn't say anything; they just smiled. 

Stitch and Angel emerged from the crowd to greet them. Chopsuey felt some kind of soothing force guiding him and Daniel into their arms.

"So happy youga come, cousins," Stitch said.

"Hope youga like music," Angel added.

"I think it'll do me some good," Chopsuey replied.

"Nothing better than music," Stitch replied.

Sample whistled from near the stage entrance.

"Showtime," Angel said. The four Experiments shared one more hug.

"Really,  _ really  _ happy youga here."

The band rushed onstage. Soon, the sparse dressing room was filled with nothing but Chopsuey, Daniel, and the echoes of the cheering audience. 

The two Experiments pulled up some chairs from a stack against the wall, sitting by the entrance. They had an enviable close-up view of the show, but they just couldn't focus on it. They'd been thinking about their gifts all day.

_ "We're caught in a trap. _

_ "I can't walk out, _

_ "Because I love you too much, baby." _

"I've been thinking..." Daniel finally said. "About our decision."

Chopsuey said nothing, but he looked at him to let him know he was listening. He still felt pink.

"And about why this music is so special..." Daniel opened his book. 

"I didn't realize just how many Earthlings are out there creating all of it. There must be more of them than there are Experiments. This book only talks about some of them, but...A few, in particular, gave me a lot to think about."

He turned a page.

"There was one called Farrokh Bulsara, but he changed his name to Freddie Mercury. Kind of like our new names."

"Yeah," Chopsuey replied.

"When he sang, everyone sang along with him. He did things nobody would ever dare do, but he made everyone feel like they could be as extraordinary as he was...And then he got sick. It was something they couldn't cure. But he didn't tell anyone. When people thought of him, he didn't want them to think of anything but the music."

As Daniel flipped to another page, Chopsuey thought of 021. He wished she'd told him about her glitch sooner. He imagined how incredible Freddie's last performances must have been, then shuddered at the thought of what might have come of 021's final attack on the Grand Councilwoman's ship. But if the threat of death could fuel one's passions, then could the promise of life change them?

"There was another named John Lennon," Daniel continued. "His music helped people feel like all the troubles in the universe weren't so impossible to overcome. He believed that all we really need is love...But somebody hated John. He hated John so much that he found him one day and...It doesn't make any sense to me. I think he did it because it was the only thing he felt he could do right. I should probably be angry at him, but I just feel sorry for him."

Daniel wiped his eyes, but a few tears still escaped down his cheek.

Chopsuey remembered how scared he'd been about staying on Earth. It wasn't the same kind of fear he had when facing down stone golems or sandworms. He thought he'd have to throw out all the skills he'd spent his life perfecting, but couldn't imagine what he'd replace it all with. It had been such a relief when he hit that bullseye in the circus tent, to know that his skills could still mean something in his new life.

He was grateful for that moment, for the bow-and-arrow. He didn't want to be like the man who killed John.

Daniel turned to another page. "This one's Lilo's favorite. Elvis Presley. They called him 'the King.' He inspired so many people to make music of their own. I don't think we'd have so much of it without Elvis. He's so loved by so many people...But one day, somebody found him..."

Daniel wiped his eyes again. Chopsuey looked at him, an Experiment who began his life as a thoughtless beast, now mourning people he'd never known. Chopsuey curled his arm around Daniel's shoulders, stroking his fur, because he couldn't help but mourn, too.

"Learning what happened to Elvis, to John, to Freddie, and to who knows how many others, it made me realize..." Daniel began.

"There's enough destruction in the universe without our help," Chopsuey finished.

"Yeah..." Daniel managed a smile. "But even with all that gets destroyed, there's just as much that gets created. And in the years that go by, what do people remember?"

He and Chopsuey looked out at their cousins' performance and their celebrating audience.

_ "We can't go on together, _

_ "With suspicious minds, _

_ "And we can't build our dreams, _

_ "On suspicious minds." _

"And if it weren't for you, Chopsuey," Daniel continued. "I would never know...So thank you."

Chopsuey tried to blink his tears away. After a life of destruction, he didn't think he'd ever create something as beautiful as the music he was hearing. But as Daniel smiled at him, he realized that he already had.

"Thank you for the roses," he finally said.

The song ended, and the audience's applause boomed. Soon, the cheers were replaced with the sound of drums.

Daniel stood up, offering his hand to Chopsuey. "Dance with me?"

Chopsuey reached pink capacity. "I don't know how."

"Neither do I."

Chopsuey felt a very different kind of fear from facing stone golems and sandworms. But was it really fear?

He put the roses down on his chair and took Daniel's hand.

_ "In the middle of the night, _

_ "I go walking in my sleep, _

_ "From the mountains of faith, _

_ "To the river so deep. _

_ "I must be looking for something, _

_ "Something sacred I lost, _

_ "But the river is wide, _

_ "And it's too hard to cross." _

Daniel and Chopsuey looked sideways at the performance, trying to mirror their cousins' movements.

Belle twirled Sample around. Chopsuey tried to do the same to Daniel, but their hands were blocked by the top of Daniel's head.

Felix dipped Elastico. Daniel nearly dropped Chopsuey.

"I'm okay," Chopsuey said as he backward-somersaulted back into his original position.

_ "Even though I know the river is wide, _

_ "I walk down every evening and stand on the shore. _

_ "I try to cross to the opposite side, _

_ "So I can finally find what I've been looking for." _

They settled on a more straightforward routine, stepping twice back, twice forwards, and snapping their fingers between each other. 

It was simpler than anything Chopsuey had ever done, but nothing had ever made him happier.

_ "In the middle of the night, _

_ "I go walking in my sleep, _

_ "Through the valley of fear, _

_ "To a river so deep. _

_ "I've been searching for something, _

_ "Taken out of my soul. _

_ "Something I'd never lose. _

_ "Something somebody stole." _

After a whole verse of stepping and finger-snapping, Chopsuey and Daniel had built up a little more confidence. They glanced again at the stage. Stitch and Angel cartwheeled, landing with their noses together.

Daniel and Chopsuey backed up. They didn't think they'd manage it, but they had nothing to lose.

_ "I don't know why I go walking at night, _

_ "But now I'm tired, and I don't wanna walk anymore. _

_ "I hope it doesn't take the rest of my life, _

_ "Until I find what it is that I've been looking for." _

To their mutual surprise, they pulled it off, complete with the noses. They were still for a moment, enjoying it.

Then they took each other's hands and danced some more.

_ "In the middle of the night, _

_ "I go walking in my sleep, _

_ "Through the desert of truth, _

_ "To the river so deep. _

_ "We all end in the ocean, _

_ "We all start in the stream, _

_ "And we're all carried along, _

_ "By the river of dreams." _

Chopsuey and Daniel felt like they could dance forever. They thought they would, and then they would dance some more.

Then their cousins' drums were joined by a new instrument, but it wasn't coming from the stage. It was there in the dressing room with Daniel and Chopsuey. It took them a moment to recognize it, but soon the lyrics echoed in their ears.

_ There's a lady who's sure, _

_ All that glitters is gold, _

_ And she's buy-- _

"Wait, wait, hold on..."

_ \--buying a stairway to heaven. _

Chopsuey and Daniel stopped their dance. They turned and found 021 standing in the doorway, playing a flute. It sounded beautiful.

They smiled at her. She lowered her flute, revealing a long-overdue smile.

"Angel was right," 021 said. "I do like Zep."


	12. Episode 11: Landslide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While adjusting to life on Earth, Flute discovers a new threat against her ohana.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Take It Easy" by the Eagles  
*"Stand By Me" by Ben E. King  
*"She's Always a Woman" by Billy Joel  
*"Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac

**Episode 11: ** _ **Landslide** _

**I**

There's nothing quite like having all the time in the world to browse a local music shop. The arrangements of the guitars along the walls, pointing upwards like ships frozen in a majestic unified takeoff. The imposing yet welcoming positioning of pianos and drumsets at the far end of the place. Cases protecting flutes as precious as ornate ceremonial staffs. The Eagles over the store radio, making her feel welcome as she perused.

_"Take it easy, take it easy,_

_"Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive ya crazy."_

Flute couldn't believe that she ever preferred anything else.

She looked back at her cousins spread around the shop. Stitch leaned on a grand piano, watching with glee as Angel taught Lilo the opening keys of _Your Song._ Nani and David played acoustic guitars, competing to see who knew more chords from _Heartbreak Hotel._

Flute wanted to join in the fun. She looked down at the flute in her clawed hand, which it hadn't left since she'd taken it out of its box. She didn't want to put it down. She wanted to keep track of the one thing she knew for sure was different between 021 and Flute.

She only knew a few songs, but in a place like this, a tribute to everything that music does for everyone, there was no better choice.

And it was her favorite song, anyway.

_There's a lady who's sure..._

She looked at Stitch, smiling as best as she could while playing. She looked forward to seeing him smile back.

_All that glitters is gold..._

Instead of smiling, Stitch looked panicked, as if Flute had just stepped on the store's self-destruct button.

_And she's buying a-_

_"Ahem."_

Flute stopped playing and turned to the shop owner, a man in a Hawaiian shirt with long black hair that flowed into a goatee. He glared at her and pointed to a sign above the register.

_'No Stairway to Heaven.'_

Flute looked between the sign and the owner. Not only did it seem ridiculous that such an incredible song would be banned in a music shop, of all places, but it was utterly unfair. What could possibly make _Stairway to Heaven _less appropriate than _Your Song _or _Heartbreak Hotel_? The owner must be singling her out, deeming her unworthy of playing music in his store. Flute wondered whether being punched through the roof or the window would teach the owner a better lesson.

"Soka, cousin," Stitch said.

Flute felt his hand on her shoulder. His touch cooled her down almost instantly. Just as quickly, she felt ashamed that she'd let 021 slip back in so easily.

"Meega did same thing once," Stitch added. "Should have told youga."

Flute looked at him, her head burning. He gave her the smile she'd hoped to earn with _Stairway to Heaven, _and she cooled down.

She sighed. "Are there any other banned songs I should know about?"

Stitch shook his head. "Anything but _Stairway _okitaka."

Flute thought for a moment. As she did, the Eagles snuck into her ears again. She'd never played this one before, but listening carefully, she could make out the notes.

Well, why not?

_"Take it easy, take it easy,_

_"Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive ya crazy._

_"Lighten up while you still can._

_"Don't even try to understand._

_"Just find a place to make your stand,_

_"And take it easy."_

That was better. Like a warm, refreshing shower for her brain. She even earned a little applause from her cousins.

"Thanks, everyone," Flute said, twisting her instrument in her claws. She hoped she wasn't blushing too much.

She returned to her browsing. Every so often, she would glance in the store owner's direction and receive a passive glare in return. She tried to stop, but the owner's eyes kept calling to her. He may as well have been yelling at her.

"Hey," she finally said to her cousins. "Time for the beach?"

**II**

As Flute sat on the beach, two thoughts dueled in her head. The first was the sight of Lilo, Stitch, Nani, and David riding the biggest, bluest wave she'd seen yet. The second was the store owner's glare and his sign, _No Stairway to Heaven. _Both images fought for her attention. Though she wanted the first to win, the second one kept getting back up for a rematch.

"What's wrong with _Stairway?" _She asked Angel, who was putting the finishing touches on the magnificent sandcastle she had built with Flute's feet inside.

"1971," Angel began. "Zep make _Stairway. _People like so much, they go to music stores and learn to play_. _But too many people. Music store workers hear _Stairway _too much. They say naga allowed anymore."

Flute scoffed, folding her arms. Her flute stuck out from her right armpit.

"I don't think there's such a thing as too much _Stairway. _If I were that guy, I'd love to have people come in and play it."

"Naga worry, Flutey." Angel placed a hand on Flute's knee. "Youga play _Stairway _much as youga want."

"Oh, I will, don't worry," Flute responded. She sighed, looking down at the sandcastle.

"I just don't get why it's only _my _song."

She kept her feet perfectly still.

Her gaze wandered to Angel's side, where her guitar case waited like a faithful companion.

"Know just what youga need," Angel said with a snap of her fingers. She took her guitar out of its case, its perfect purple plaint glimmering in the sunlight, and handed it to Flute.

"Oh...I've never played before."

"Gonna teach youga."

Flute usually wouldn't put down her flute, but for Angel and her legendary guitar, she could make an exception. She carefully lowered the flute into the guitar case, then took the guitar, holding it delicately as though it were made of glass.

Angel showed her which strings to hold. A few minutes later, Flute could switch between them with relative ease. It felt strange on her wrist at first, but she settled into it by thinking of the strings like the holes on a flute.

She strummed the four chords in the rhythm Angel showed her. Once she'd settled into it, Angel joined in.

_"When the night has come,_

_"And the land is dark,_

_"And the moon is the only light we'll see."_

Flute remembered what 021 had said about Angel and her music. Before, it seemed preposterous for Angel to sing anything but her siren song. Now, Flute marveled at every song she heard Angel sing. She thought her voice would be wasted on her siren song now.

_"No, I won't be afraid,_

_"Oh, I won't be afraid,_

_"Just as long as you stand,_

_"Stand by me."_

Flute's fingers were playing on their own now. She could just sit back and enjoy Angel's performance.

Angel clapped, snapped her fingers, and just seemed so happy, as if this song, this moment, was her entire life.

Flute wished she could feel like that.

_"So darling, darling,_

_"Stand by me._

_"Oh, stand by me._

_"Oh, stand, stand by me._

_"Stand by me."_

After the song, Angel applauded Flute.

"I've heard you play it better," Flute said, returning the guitar to its owner.

In truth, she could say that about any song, even _Stairway._

"Youga did great," Angel said. She pulled Flute into a hug.

"Youga doing great."

Flute squeezed back. She'd been thinking a lot lately about how big she was. Most of her cousins only came up to her stomach, and she could pick them up with one hand. She often felt like a giant trying not to step on a village of insects. She used to consider it a strength, but now it felt like a burden. One of the few others who was like her was...

"Okitaka, Flutey?" Angel asked, pulling away.

"Yeah," Flute said.

"Thinking about Kixx?"

Flute said nothing. First, she tried not to picture the purple, musclebound Experiment. When that didn't work, she tried to envision his face from their last encounter.

_"I know it ain't much after all this time..."_

But no matter how hard she tried, her mind kept slipping back to their arm wrestle in Jumba's lab, to 601's slimy grin, to the smoldering fury which had suffocated her for far too long.

"Kixx say he still want see youga," Angel said.

"I know," Flute replied. "I...I'm just not ready yet."

"Okitaka," Angel said. She reached back into her guitar case and returned the flute.

Flute took it as quickly and tightly as she would've grabbed a floating plank in the middle of the ocean.

"Whenever youga ready, then."

Angel and Flute shared another hug. Flute knew that she owed a lot of them to all her cousins.

Soon, Lilo, Stitch, Nani, and David returned with their boards, and Angel went to join them on the waves. Flute opted to stay on the beach for a little while longer. She had two reasons for doing so.

The first was that she was anxious for another climb up the _Stairway._

The second was that she didn't want to ruin Angel's sandcastle.

**III**

Sleep was something else that Flute never used to think much of. 021 had thought of it as time spent not creating havoc and destruction for the galaxy. Now, Flute thought of it as a break. There was just the couch, her pillow, and the cassette player David had lent her.

She dreamed of the notes, envisioning colors and shapes which just somehow fit them. They never formed anything specific; they only let her see what the songs made her feel.

Tonight, she was soothed to sleep by Fleetwood Mac. She strummed along to _Rhiannon, _playing an invisible flute on her belly.

She wondered what the Fleetwood Macs, the Led Zeppelins, the Beatles of Earth felt when they created their beautiful music. Her cousins had told her that a lot of them felt sad or angry just like she did sometimes. But she thought there must be something more. Something she came close to in her sleep but which eluded her during the day.

In the fleeting, silent intermission between _Rhiannon _and _Over My Head, _Flute heard the door click open. She sat up, looking to the door in time to see a bit of blue before it clicked shut again.

"Stitch?" She muttered, rubbing her eyes and taking her headphones off.

She stepped outside. The sun was down, but the air was as warm as ever. Just one of many things about Hawaii that Flute didn't need to understand.

She found Stitch at the bottom of the steps, walking down the dirt road. It was strange to see him without Lilo or Angel or both. He looked like a crooked painting.

Flute followed him down the steps. Was something bothering him? Was he still thinking about how she played _Stairway _in the music shop? Was he so frustrated by her that he needed a breath of fresh air to calm down?

Flute remembered how he'd smiled at her in the music shop. That hadn't been the smile of someone embarrassed to be seen with her. She told herself this, branded it onto her mind, but an ugly little voice in there kept spitting back, _"You never know."_

A simple chat would sort it all out. These days, Flute found that most things could be solved with a simple chat.

Most things.

_"I know it ain't much after all this time..."_

She was on the dirt road, only a few feet behind Stitch when she noticed the device he was speaking into. It was a communicator like the ones Jumba used to use, only black instead of red. Flute could hear a crackling, electric, and familiarly grating voice coming from it.

_"Don't be looking so smugly smug with your smug self! You are still being a whole day behind schedule!"_

Stitch responded with someone else's voice. It had a bouncy slur about it, like a sinister version of Bruce Springsteen.

"Sorry, Doctor. I didn't realize that 021 would be staying with 626 and 624. I had to wait until I could get one of them away from the others, but they stick to each other like glue. But I promise I'll have the three of them rounded up within twenty-four hours. Then I'll teleport them over to you all at once."

_"You'd better, or I'll...I'll...Well, do it before I think of something very painful to be doing to you!"_

The communicator shut off.

"Yes, Dr. Hamsterviel."

Flute stood right behind 'Stitch,' making herself seem as huge as possible. She thought she wouldn't have to do this ever again, but an imposter posing as her cousin was worth the exception.

"You're not Stitch," she growled.

The imposter looked at her over his shoulder. The resemblance to Stitch was genuinely uncanny. The notches in his ears, the wrinkles along the bridge of his nose, his fur's oceanic shade of blue. Every perfect flaw was indistinguishable from Flute's mental image of her cousin.

The only giveaway was his eyes. When he turned to look at her, his eyes went cold. It wasn't a look which Stitch couldn't give, but one he wouldn't give.

Flute reached out to grab the imposter, intent on frightening him until he revealed what had happened to the real Stitch. Instead, he ducked under her lashing claws, seized a handful of sand, and threw it in her face.

Flute spat, rubbing her eyes with one hand and reaching for the imposter with the other. She only swiped at thin air. All she could see was her mental image of how stupid she must have looked. She was fuming so much that, by the time she'd gotten the sand out of her face, she may as well have melted it away.

The imposter was gone, but his footprints gave his trail away. (Even they were identical to the ones Flute had seen on many seaside walks with her new ohana). Flute stormed after them, replacing the imposter's light trail with sandy craters.

She was led back to the house. She didn't waste any time running inside, up the stairs, and to Lilo, Stitch, and Angel's room.

She was going to burst in, even if it meant waking everybody up, and declare for the whole island to hear, _'That isn't Stitch!'_

"Okitaka, booj?" She heard Angel ask in a sleepy purr.

"Ih," the imposter replied. "Just bathroom."

"Ah. _Opera _or _Races?"_

_"Opera, _please. Wanna hear _Sunday Afternoon."_

"Ooh. Meega, too."

Flute peeked in through the door. Lilo seemed to have been asleep forever. Angel and the imposter were curled up at her feet, smiling as they drifted off to the music from their headphones.

Flute suddenly stopped where she was as if an invisible forcefield were keeping her out of the room. The declaration echoing in her brain couldn't find its way to her lips. She waited for the imposter to look up with a sinister grin, some kind of giveaway she could exploit if she called out fast enough. All he did was purr when Angel lazily licked his nose.

Flute was boiling. All she had to do was storm in and call the imposter out. Why couldn't she do it?

She knew perfectly well why. She could see it in her mind's eye. Her ohana looking at their innocent cousin Stitch, and then at her, the ungrateful guest pointlessly tormenting them.

Looking at the imposter snoozing, Flute almost mistook him again for the real Stitch. She knew she was right, but nobody else would. And what would they do if she tried to speak out? That was the one image her mind couldn't, or wouldn't, picture. Instead, she shut the door and went back downstairs.

She only got halfway down before she had to stop. She sat down, buried her face in her knees, and cried. She cried for her new life already slipping through her fingers, and for the fuming, hateful growl of 021 inside her head that just. Wouldn't. Go. Away.

She cried until her eyes were sore. Then she was finally able to brush aside 021's wretched growl. She retraced the past few days in her mind, scrutinizing every second for the moment where the imposter must have snatched Stitch away. Flute had spent nearly every waking moment with her cousins since she returned to Earth. Had the imposter swiped Stitch up in his sleep? No, the imposter had said that he had waited until Stitch was separated from Angel and Flute.

It had to be when Stitch went surfing while Angel and Flute built sandcastles and played guitar. When Stitch fell off his board, he was always able to walk on the ocean floor back to the beach. The imposter must've made his move underwater.

He _must _have.

Flute wiped her eyes, stood up, and went back outside. She considered taking her flute, but the thought of getting it wet was worse than the thought of being without it for a while.

She set on her way, whispering to herself as she walked.

_"There's a lady who's sure..."_

**IV**

Between the dark blue sky and the darker sea was the first orange sliver of dusk.

Flute had never been on the water before, although her ohana had offered to take her many times. She knew it was a silly thing to be afraid of. She supposed she couldn't stand not knowing precisely what was in the water, not having the guarantee that it wouldn't hurt her as it wouldn't hurt her cousins.

Not unlike Kixx.

_"I know it ain't much after all this time..."_

Flute knew she was in the right spot because the remnants of Angel's sandcastle were still there. She hoped there would be some kind of clue on the water of exactly where Stitch was, but every bit of it looked exactly the same.

She would have to go under.

Stitch did it for fun almost every day. She could do it just once for him.

She was still scared, but she thought of how Stitch must be feeling. That was all she needed to take the first step.

The water was cold for all of a second before it went warm. The sand crumbled and melted around Flute's toes. She took a few more steps until she was up to her chest. She thought she saw a few things scurrying away from her. She froze, catching her breath. Once she had it, she whispered one last time.

_"And she's buying a stairway to heaven..."_

Three more steps and she was underneath.

It was like walking on a moon. Every movement was in slow-motion. She could feel her fur waving away from her body, like millions of miniature flags attached to her skin.

Her eyes were shut. She walked in a straight line for a while without seeing where she was going. She knew she should open them, but she just couldn't.

A few small things blew past her ear, flicking it as if to shove it out of their way. Something soft with a round end brushed her belly. Something long and squishy curled around her ankle. Its grip was weak, yet it maintained with each eternal step Flute took.

Finally, somehow, Flute went from being incapable of opening her eyes to being unable to keep them closed.

She saw darkness. It was as if she were lost in the night sky. There was, however, still that sliver of orange. It cast silhouettes of the little things surrounding her. Each colorful, finned creature and shelled reptile, whatever they were, regarded her with black eyes, which stared with nothing more or less than curiosity. One of them, a small orange one, nibbled curiously at her nose before returning to its usual morning routine.

Flute looked down at the creature that had her ankle. It was a tiny, dark blue thing with misty tentacles. It looked up at her with black eyes, which said, _'Thanks for the fun ride, whoever you are.'_

Flute looked straight ahead. In the distance, like a gaping mouth in the middle of the ocean, was a black ship. It was smaller than Jumba's, but it wasn't pod-sized. It was about the size of one of the trucks she'd seen near Elastico's circus, only this ship didn't have any welcoming pictures promising joyous acrobatic performances. Only darkness.

More than a minute later, she was right in front of it. She was beginning to miss oxygen.

She knew the imposter must've had some kind of airlock, but she couldn't spot it from this side. Even so, wherever it was, it must be locked by some sort of passcode. Her best bet was to punch her way in. First, she had to get the ship to the surface.

She dug her claws under the sand, finding the ship's underside. It was even heavier than she thought; it was as if the ocean were trying to tell her, _'You can't have it.'_

She couldn't care less about what the ocean thought about it.

She crawled underneath the ship once she'd made enough space, positioning its weight on her shoulders. Then she pushed against it with her palms, lifting it above her head.

It was so heavy. She may as well have been lifting a planet.

She expected the blue creature to flee in fear at the massive, looming ship. Instead, its feeble tentacles were as possessive of Flute's ankle as her claws had been of her flute for the past few weeks. It wasn't so bad. It was nice to not feel alone in this dark place.

Flute rotated herself, feeling the water warping around her as the ship spun with her. She never realized how much she loved breathing.

She began her trek back. Each step was an even greater effort with the ship above her. It always tried to escape her grasp, tilting and forcing her to recenter it above her.

Her chest felt like it would burst at any moment.

The darkness had become orange. She was mere steps away from the surface. The ship tilted forward. She dove forward to keep it centered, leaning until her chest rested on her knee.

She was trapped in a paradox, needing to move forward to reach forward, but also needing to keep still so she wouldn't drop the ship.

She didn't know what would happen if she ran out of breath. Worse, she didn't know what would happen to Stitch, or to the rest of her ohana.

That moment became her eternity.

She looked down at the blue creature. It wasn't just along for the ride anymore; it was pulling on her ankle, straining to lift her foot into one more step. Flute could barely even feel it, but she granted its wish all the same.

Within a few grueling seconds, her moment of eternity ended in a desperate, roaring breath.

The air had never been warmer, and the orange morning sky never brighter. For barely a second, the ship was weightless, and then Flute had to bring it down. It thudded onto the border between the beach and the ocean, splashing up water and sand on either side.

Flute climbed on top of it. She lifted her foot carefully, giving the blue creature time to release it so as not to hurt its delicate tentacles. She glanced back into the water, but couldn't find its soft black eyes beneath the shallow waves.

"Thank you," she called out to the water, hoping the creature would hear her, wherever it was.

Finally, the moment of truth. The hull was sturdy; it took a vicious beating before it finally conceded and let Flute through. It hurt her fist, but it was far from the most painful thing she'd ever felt.

Not even close.

She was greeted by a bright red screen and a robotic voice screaming, _"INT-!"_

That was all it could manage before Flute reduced it to scrap.

She hated all this smashing. This was what 021 was like. It was worse than losing her temper at a shopkeeper banning her favorite song. There, she had her flute and her cousins to help her remember who she really was. Now, she couldn't banish 021 again until she found-

There he was, in the center of this room, which seemed eerily like Jumba's new lab near Mars. He was frozen in midair, and in mid-pounce, claws bared. His eyes and expression seemed off as if Flute were looking at a photograph of Stitch, not the genuine article. He was glaring. Flute thought Stitch's glare was uniquely distressing. He didn't look angry, as virtually everyone and especially Flute did when they glared. He looked disappointed. Somehow, that was much worse. But this glare was particularly strange. Flute felt like she was peeking at a letter written to somebody else.

Beside him was a red machine that resembled an Experiment-sized blaster on wheels. It spat out a thin line of energy that snaked around Stitch.

Flute wanted to smash the machine to bits, but she was tired of smashing. She settled for flipping a black switch at its back.

_"-queesta!"_

Flute was suddenly on the floor, pinned by her cousin, who had flown at her like a plasma bolt.

_"It's me, cousin," _she yelled. _"It's Flute!"_

Stitch stopped, blinking as if a camera had just flashed in front of his eyes. His glare of brutal disappointment faded into one of gentle concern. It filled Flute with relief to know that this face was meant for her.

"Oh! Soka, cousin." Stitch helped her up, his ears drooping. "Youga okay?"

"Never mind me," Flute responded. "Are you okay?"

"Ih...Where 628?" He asked. He looked up at the entrance Flute had made, where the orange sunlight brought some much-needed color to the ship's bleak grey interior.

"Huh? Thought ship was underwater...Ohana okay?"

"Everyone else is fine," Flute said. "You've been here since yesterday. That other guy...628, I guess; he's pretending to be you."

"Gaba?!" Stitch gasped. "...He doing good job?"

"Yeah, actually. I'll be honest, he's pretty spot-on. I only found out because I caught him sending a message to Hamsterviel."

"Oh, no..." Stitch buried his face in his hands.

At that, Flute couldn't contain herself anymore. She pulled her cousin into a hug. She had to kneel to reach him.

"I missed you," she said.

Stitch reciprocated her hug. He could barely reach over her shoulders.

"Did youga go underwater for meega?" He asked.

"...Yeah. I did."

She felt Stitch squeeze tighter.

They both knew that they'd have to return home as soon as possible, but they savored the moment. Flute was glad. She needed it.

Finally, Stitch spoke again.

"Did youga see Billy the Squid?"

**V**

It turned out that Flute and Stitch didn't need to return home. The rest of their ohana was already following her footprints along the beach, calling out her name. They met up halfway. Lilo had brought Flute's flute.

Flute was ready for a happy reunion and for a swift expulsion of the imposter from their lives. Unfortunately, it didn't play out quite as she liked.

That, she found, seemed to be the recurring theme of her life.

"What was your first job?" Nani asked.

"Ice cream stand," both Stitches answered.

"First song of first street show?" Angel asked.

_"Can't Help Falling in Love. _Elvis."

"Who taught you to surf?" David asked.

"Youga," accompanied by synchronized eye-rolls.

"What was the first thing you said to me?" Lilo asked.

"Hi..." Even their toothy grins and waving claws were identical.

Each answer was accompanied by the two Stitches looking at each other and making the same growling glare.

Flute wiped sweat from her brow. She was eerily reminded of the pitch-perfect harmonies of _Queen. _How could the imposter know all this? There must be something he'd missed. Something he must've thought wasn't important. But what?

She got an idea. It seemed silly, but then again, that meant it just might be something that 628 had skipped over.

"I know," Flute announced. "Let's go to the music store."

Everyone was skeptical, but they followed Flute nonetheless.

The walk to the music store was one of the most excruciatingly awkward experiences Flute thought she would ever have. The two Stitches glaring at each other was bad enough, but the way the rest of her cousins looked at them was worse. They all had this strange, sad look that combined anger and concern. The trouble was they couldn't tell which Stitch deserved which, so they could only let their emotions stew as they walked.

It was a relief when they finally reached the music store. Billy Joel greeted them today.

_"She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes,_

_"She can ruin your faith with her casual lies,_

_"And she only reveals what she wants you to see,_

_"She hides like a child, but she's always a woman to me."_

The shopkeeper was recording some inventory behind the counter. He regarded Flute with a smile that felt hollow.

She ignored him.

She beckoned for her cousins to stand beside her while the two Stitches stood across from them. They looked like anxious contestants on a talent show.

"Watch them carefully," she told her ohana. With that, she did what she did best.

_There's a lady who's sure,_

_All that glitters is gold..._

One Stitch went pale, his claws hovering outwards as if to try and stop Flute.

The other simply stood there and listened. He even gave a curious smile.

Flute had to give the imposter credit. If nothing else, he had good taste in music.

"Hey," the shopkeeper snapped. "I told you already. No _Stairway."_

628 looked at the shopkeeper and sealed his fate with four words.

"What's wrong with _Stairway?"_

He looked back at Flute and her ohana. He was met with a wall of glares.

Flute glanced back at her cousins. She could guess where Stitch had learned his disappointed look.

"Cousins?" 628 said feebly.

"You have a lot of explaining to do," Lilo said. "'Stitch.'"

628 stepped back, inching his way along the wall of guitars. He lifted a finger as if he were about to say something. He kept silent, but his fur melted into an inky green liquid, exactly like Spooky's watery, shapeless body. It then reassembled itself into the form of the extraordinary, the enchanting, the ever-expandable Elastico.

Appearance-wise, he was as spot-on as he'd been with Stitch. But he'd dropped the act now. He made the always-graceful and bouncy Elastico look deadpan and flatfooted. And as for the voice...

"You're extremely annoying, you know that?" The evil Bruce Springsteen said before stretching his way to the door.

_"Grab him!" _Stitch exclaimed.

_"Careful around the drums!" _The shopkeeper yelled.

Each of the Pelekai cousins leaped after the false Elastico. Flute dived, landing on the floor and dropping her flute, but managing to catch the false Elastico's ankle as the rest of him elongated out the door.

_"Gotcha," _she yelled.

"That so?" 628 called back.

Flute found herself sliding across the floor, out the door, across the pavement, and finally, to her most sickening surprise, into the sky. The false Elastico's leg wound up like a tape measure, but she wasn't going to let him go. Not after what he'd put her and her ohana through.

She was soon face-to-face with 628 again. Now he was borrowing the look and powers of Sparky. The moment she was close, he gave her a demonstration in the form of a torrent of lightning.

It hurt every bit as much as it had during the fight at the generator. On the one hand, it was painful. On the other, it was nothing Flute hadn't pushed through before.

"Hey..." She said through her teeth, clamping her eyes shut and tightening her grip on the false Sparky's ankle.

"Don't...Feel like...You have to spend...All of it...On me..."

At that, 628 reached down and seized her by tufts of her on her chest.

Belle's face glared at her. Their noses were inches apart.

As any Zep fan rightly would, Flute had often listened to their songs at her headphones' maximum volume. She knew it couldn't be great for her ears, but there was no better way to enjoy the likes of _Immigrant Song _or _Black Dog._

And yet even they weren't enough to prepare Flute for the false Belle's scream. The real Belle had used her scream on her back when she was still 021, but she'd at least had the common decency to nail the final section of _Stairway _while doing so.

628 just screamed and screamed. Flute's world became pure noise. She could barely even open her eyes. The fact that they were now plummeting to the ground didn't help matters at all.

Flute pushed through the torrent of noise, seizing the false Belle's face and clamping her mouth shut. She was then able to swerve her opponent around her so he would hit the ground first.

She opened her eyes and was immediately seized around the neck by a massive, purple-furred fist.

"Alright," Kixx said in that malevolent Springsteen impression. "I'm done being creative. I _know _for a _fact _that 601 is stronger than you. Now let's see how _you _like it!"

With that, Kixx threw an uppercut into Flute's gut. She let out a painful scream as if it had been squeezed out of her by the blow. It was like having a meteor land in her stomach or having a dozen Pete Townshends swing their guitars at her simultaneously.

She lost her hold on Kixx, clutching her numb gut. Kixx returned them to their previous position, with Flute mere yards away from the pavement.

She knew it wouldn't kill her. It wouldn't have killed any Experiment, not even the smaller ones like Finder or Felix. But it would hurt a lot, and it would hurt her much more than it would Kixx.

Just like always.

Just before the tops of buildings came into Flute's peripheral vision, Kixx was suddenly intercepted by a blue ball. Then, just as she braced herself for the pavement at her back, Flute instead landed in a pair of furry arms.

"Phew. Was scared youga heavier."

Angel set Flute down. Her heart seemed to land in her body several seconds later.

"Thanks for standing by me, cousin," Flute said to a smiling Angel.

They turned to find Stitch and Kixx wrestling on the sidewalk. Whatever passers-by weren't fleeing or taking pictures were watching confused. They teetered as if they wanted to jump in and help, but they either weren't sure who they should help, or they didn't think they could do anything to help two super-strong alien Experiments.

Kixx headbutted Stitch, then followed up with sucker punch to the nose, knocking the blue Experiment off his feet.

Flute was suddenly on fire. She pounced at Kixx, seizing him around the neck and hurling him over her shoulder. He slammed back-first onto the pavement, which cracked beneath him. It burned just as much as it had back on Jumba's ship years ago. Flute put her knee on his throat, then roared at him. Spit flew in his face, and the street was filled with a monstrous voice that had finally escaped from Flute's mind.

_"Why did you have to ruin everything, you selfish trog?! All I wanted was to live here in peace with my ohana! To not feel like such a piece of trash every day! Why can't people like you just leave me and my ohana alone?!"_

She lifted her fists above her head, ready to make Kixx, 628, whoever it was, really feel all the horrible things eating away at her.

For a moment, she thought everything had turned green.

And then, after the spit-filled roar had escaped her jaws, the air was filled again, this time with soft piano notes. Then, they were accompanied by a young but powerful voice.

_"Oh, she takes care of herself,_

_"She can wait if she wants,_

_"She's ahead of her time."_

Flute looked at the music shop. The door was being held open by Nani and David. In the window, she could see Lilo at the piano, playing away.

Nani, David, Angel, and Stitch joined in with Lilo.

_"Oh, and she never gives out,_

_"And she never gives in,_

_"She just changes her mind."_

The on-lookers joined in as well, perhaps for lack of anything else they could do to help.

_"She's frequently kind, then she's suddenly cruel,_

_"She can do as she pleases, she's nobody's fool,_

_"And she can't be convicted, she's earned her degree..."_

Flute looked down at 628. He'd melted into his true inky green form, and looked up at her with expectant black eyes. In them, Flute could see her reflection, although it wasn't quite her. It was someone else, someone she hadn't seen in a long time, and who she didn't want to see ever again.

_"And the most she will do is throw shadows at you,_

_"But she's always a woman to me."_

Flute sighed. She felt the heat burning her mind leave with her breath. She was tired of feeling angry.

"Hey," she said to 628, removing her knee from his neck (or where a neck would be on a puddle of ink).

"I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have shouted at you. But you shouldn't have taken my cousin and pretended to be him...But I've done a lot of things I shouldn't have done. All our cousins have, but they all helped each other get better. They'll help you, too. We all will. You don't have to be like this if you don't want to be."

She offered her hand. 628 regarded it with a look of confusion. Seconds passed before his inky form began to assume another shape.

Flute hoped he would transform into a body of his own making, something friendly. Instead, she found herself looking down into the wide, black eyes of Houdini. With a blink, the imposter vanished. Flute reached out to seize him, but she only grasped air.

Stitch and Angel approached her.

"I'm sorry," she said, blinking in a vain attempt to stop her eyes from leaking. "I shouldn't have..."

They hugged her. She knelt down to hug them back.

Lilo approached her next, returning her beloved flute.

Flute reached for it, then pulled Lilo gently into the group hug instead.

Her three cousins together filled Flute's massive arms. She wanted to say something to them but didn't. She knew she didn't have to.

**VI**

Flute couldn't understand why her feet stopped working outside the gates of Muscle Bay Gym.

Objectively, it was nowhere near as scary as the ocean. Here, she could see what she was in for; an assortment of weights, treadmills, exercise machines, and punching bags, as well as a few gym-goers, some like twigs and others like tanks, working away. Not to mention the fact that she could actually breathe here. Really, the worst thing she'd find would be the smell of everyone else's sweat.

And yet it still wasn't enough to make her take those last few steps.

Perhaps a song on her flute would calm her nerves.

Usually, _Stairway _would be her go-to, but it just didn't fit her mood right now. Instead, she chose one of the soothing melodies she'd dreamed to last night, courtesy of Fleetwood Mac.

As she played, she listened to her memory of Stevie Nicks' hypnotic voice.

_"I took my love, I took it down,_

_"Climbed a mountain and I turned around,_

_"And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills,_

_"'Til the landslide brought me down."_

She already felt more at ease. Her flute extracted all her fears and anxieties from her, then released them into the air as music.

_"Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?_

_"Can the child within my heart rise above?_

_"Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?_

_"Can I handle the seasons of my life?"_

Suddenly, Stevie's voice was replaced by one much gruffer. But Flute couldn't stop now. She was at her favorite part.

_"Well, I've been afraid of changing,_

_"'Cause I've built my life around you,_

_"But time makes you bolder,_

_"Even children get older,_

_"And I'm getting older, too,_

She found Kixx standing in the gateway. He leaned against the edge of the fence. He smiled in a way Flute had never seen on him before. All she could remember was his infuriatingly smug smile during their last arm-wrestling contest, and the cold glare from 628's impression of him. But this smile didn't seem like either of them. And yet it suited Kixx's face more than they did.

_"And I'm getting older, too," _he finished. "Seems you're gettin' into Fleetwood, huh?"

"Starting to, yeah," Flute answered as she twisted her flute in her hands. Her response came quicker than she expected. She waited for that sickening hesitance to return, but it never did.

"Zep's my favorite, though."

"I know," Kixx said. "That, uh...That was really beautiful."

Flute was silent. She couldn't have thought of a response in a million years.

Kixx cleared his throat. "Sorry. I would 'a come out to meet ya sooner, but I was on the phone with Heat."

"Heat?"

"Yeah. Number 609. Don't know if ya remember him. He was the one with the..." He traced a large oval in front of his forehead.

"Anyway, he and some others are travelin' right now. He calls me every...Well, every day. So...Yeah..."

Flute was amazed. Nothing about the Experiment in front of her resembled the 601 she remembered. Gloating was replaced with sincerity. Cockiness had become consideration. He didn't stand tall, drawing attention to his muscles as he always used to. Now, he stood plainly, with his muscles, which seemed to have only grown since Flute had last seen him, being something that was merely there, no more significant than the sand on the beach.

And yet it was unmistakably the same Experiment, as uncanny as 628's impression of Stitch.

Flute kept silent as she processed it all.

"I just..." She finally began. "I just came by to let you know there's a new Experiment out there. He's a shapeshifter like Spooky. He might try to replace you or one of our cousins. So, just...You know. Watch out."

"Oh...Thanks for letting me know..." Kixx replied. "Hey, uh...I meant what I said. That really _was _beautiful. I love music, but I'm not really good at any instrument. All I've got is..." He lifted his meaty fingers, looking at them as if they were uncomfortable gloves glued to his hands.

"Well, any instrument takes practice," Flute replied. "Just like getting strong. You have to work at it...If you think about it, that's what everything's like."

Kixx smiled. "Yeah...You're right."

Flute smiled back. Her memories of 601 were beginning to feel like a dream. But there was still something that was bothering her.

"Hey," she said. "Wanna have an arm wrestle?"

Now it was Kixx's turn to be silent.

"You, uh..." He eventually said. "You sure?"

Flute nodded. "Yeah."

They found a table on the other side of the gym. As they grasped hands, the warm air around Flute dropped into a metallic chill. The blue sky above her turned to a dull grey, and the empty space surrounding the table was darkened by the shadows of cheering Experiments.

The wrestle began. There were a few seconds where she thought she would do it. After all this time, she would finally be able to do what she'd been built to do. She burned hotter and hotter the closer she came.

And then, in a blink, her hand was under Kixx's.

For a moment, she burned worse than she ever had before.

And then it all melted away. She was back in the gym, under the perfectly blue sky, in the wonderful warm air. The burning vanished. In their place was the echo of Kixx's voice.

_"That really was beautiful."_

She looked at her hand under Kixx's and thought nothing more of it.

Kixx looked at her as if disappointed at his own victory.

Flute smiled. "Well done," she said. "Hey, you think you can show me how to use some of these machines?"

Kixx smiled back. "Sure...Then maybe you could teach me a few notes?"

Flute felt a warm breeze blow by her. It seemed to lift something from her, something she'd been dragging with her for far too long. She felt lighter, warmer, better than she'd ever felt. She wondered why she'd been dragging it at all.

"Sounds like a deal."


	13. Episode 12: Just the Way You Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chopsuey and Daniel embark on a fantastic voyage at Poxy's request, hoping to alter the living virus into something less infectious.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Are You Lonesome Tonight" - Elvis Presley  
*"Oh! You Pretty Things" - David Bowie  
*"Just the Way You Are" - Billy Joel

**Episode 12: ** _ **Just the Way You Are** _

**I**

"How's that look, Chops?" Clip asked as she held a mirror behind Chopsuey's mohawk, which was now shorter but also fluffier than it had once been.

As Chopsuey examined the reflection of a reflection in the mirror in front of him, he wanted to say, _'It looks spectacular, cousin. Thank you so much.'_

"Great," was all he could manage without letting loose the monstrous sneeze writhing in his nose.

"Anythin' else for you today?" Clip asked, puffing up Chopsuey's mohawk with her long, scissor-like claws. She was small, only reaching Chopsuey in his chair by standing on a tall stool. Had her fur been white instead of gold, she would've seemed like an extension of Chopsuey's mohawk.

"Gel? Conditioner? Dye?"

Those words were gibberish to Chopsuey. He would've asked what they were, but his jaws were busy reigning in this wrathful sneeze.

He looked to Daniel, who was reading something called _The Hobbit _by the door, for suggestions.

Daniel looked up and smiled. "Anything you want, Chop," he said. "I love you just the way you are."

That got a smile out of Chopsuey. Unfortunately, it also coaxed his roaring sneeze out as well. He made a sound like the mating call of a People-Eating Pus Monkey.

"Wow. Bless you," Clip said, pulling herself back onto her stool. "Sounds like you've got a cold."

"A what?" Chopsuey asked with a sniff.

"A cold. It goes around every year or so. I had a real bad one about a month ago. I sneezed more than I spoke, and even when I did speak, it sounded like I was gargling cardboard."

"Did, uh..." Chopsuey sniffed again. "Did your nose feel irritatingly itchy?"

"Yeah."

"And did you get sweaty for no reason?"

"Oh, it was the worst. I looked like a mophead."

Another sniff. They were becoming second nature to Chopsuey. It at least felt better not to be holding it in anymore.

"How did you cure it?" He asked.

"That's the trouble," Clip said. "There's no real cure for it. You just have to rest and stay warm until it goes away."

That didn't make sense to Chopsuey. There must be a better way than just waiting for it to go away. Even with his new name, his new life, his new ohana, one of the few remnants of 621 he'd kept was his planning mind. So, even as he left Clip's salon with a packet of tissues, he was already thinking of possible ways to kill this so-called 'common cold' for good.

However, maintaining a train of thought was a challenge when Daniel kept kissing him on the cheek every few seconds.

"Careful, Dan." Chopsuey dodged the next incoming kiss.

"I don't want you to get a cold, too."

"I don't care," Daniel replied. "It'll go away if we just rest and keep warm, right? If we both have colds, then we can rest and keep warm together...And to be honest, I just like kissing you that much."

Chopsuey looked at Daniel, who was smiling in a way that 627 never could. Chopsuey really didn't want Daniel to feel like this; sweat dripping down the sides of his head, his nose like fire, a sneeze always brewing indecisively in his nostrils. He didn't want anybody to feel like this. But to know that Daniel felt something that made all that insignificant...

"You're really not worried?" Chopsuey asked.

Daniel shook his head. "And also...I hate the thought of you having to go through it by yourself."

Chopsuey smiled. He felt what Daniel must be feeling. Clip said he should keep warm; this was easily the best way to do so.

"If you're sure," he said. He leaned in towards Daniel to-

_"AH-CHOO!"_

-slap a tissue over his nose. Once he'd tossed the tissue into a nearby bin, he kissed Daniel on the cheek.

"Don't worry," Daniel said. "I'm sure I'll be sneezing all over you, too, soon."

**II**

Chopsuey felt a particularly bizarre flavor of deja vu sweep over him each time he entered Lilo's garage-turned-Jumba's old lab. The first time he'd been inside, he was stealing the programming chamber and 627's pod. He'd done so under cover of darkness. Entering it now, by invitation in the daylight, he still felt that rush 621 would get during an infiltration mission. It was like 621 was trying to creep back out.

Well, too bad for him.

Jumba's old inventions were strewn about the place. Ray guns of varying sizes, an old laptop (at least by Turonian standards), a space pod barely larger than the average Experiment, and several hollow metal structures; victims of Jumba's fleeting curiosities.

At the end of the garage was a desk. It had a lamp, a rack of files, a tank containing something thick and green, and a certain Earthling scribbling away at some paper.

"Anything you want from the store?" Lilo asked into a headset.

"Sure. I'll see if they have any."

Daniel looked at Chopsuey with a finger pressed to his lips. He then crept up behind Lilo's chair.

Chopsuey did his best to hold in his latest sneeze.

_"Lilo is traveling tonight on a plane," _Daniel sang as he scooped up a laughing Lilo, raising her high above his head before pulling her into a hug. Once they were done, Lilo ran to Chopsuey.

"Careful, Lilo," Chopsuey sniffed, holding his arms out. "I've got a cold."

"Oh...Well, one quick hug won't hurt." Lilo hugged him, spun him around, then set him back on his feet.

"You both talk like that now," Chopsuey said. "But don't blame me when you star-har-har-_HAH-CHOO!"_

Daniel was lightning-fast with a tissue, catching the sneeze like a baseball in a mitt.

"Thanks, booj," Chopsuey said.

"So," Daniel turned to Lilo. "What did you want to show us, cousin?"

Lilo lit up as she handed them the papers she'd been working on.

Daniel and Chopsuey found likenesses of themselves; red and green silhouettes with rounded hands and feet. To the right of each was a list.

_Daniel. Likes:_

_-Reading_

_-David Bowie_

_-Chopsuey_

_Chopsuey. Likes:_

_-Archery_

_-The Beatles_

_-Daniel_

To the left of each was a legend; _color = good, white = bad. _According to Lilo's diagrams, Daniel and Chopsuey were almost completely good.

"Aw, Lilo," Daniel said.

"Every new cousin gets their own GLC," Lilo said.

"GLC?"

"Goodness Level Chart." Lilo pointed to a rack of files on her desk. There were six files, thick as novels, and labeled in crayon with _1-series _through _6-series._

Chopsuey was surprised. He hadn't thought he'd earned such a high score yet. Still, despite having proof of how far he'd come in front of him, he couldn't help feeling like he still had a little further to go. That little sliver of white at the tips of his GLC likeness' ears nagged at him worse than his itching nose. He had to fill it in. He needed the full percentage, despite the assurances of Daniel and Stitch and Angel and so many others that they thought he was good enough. He loved them, he really did, but he would never stop seeing those slivers of white, of 621, until he did something to fill them in.

The only question was, _what?_

He pushed past it as best as he could, for now, enjoying the visit with Lilo. They talked about hula, archery, _The Hobbit, _and listened to records.

_Are you lonesome tonight?_

_Do you miss me tonight?_

_Are you sorry we drifted apart?_

_Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day,_

_When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?_

Chopsuey even got a hot chocolate out of it. It didn't eliminate his cold, but it made it somewhat more bearable. Now it was sitting across a table from him rather than up in his face.

Soon, the conversation circled around to the tank and headset on Lilo's desk.

"Here." Lilo handed the headset to Daniel and Chopsuey, who sandwiched it between an ear each.

"Give him a sec. He's a little shy."

They gave 'him,' whoever he was, several secs. Daniel snuck in another kiss, and Chopsuey another sneeze before they finally heard something.

_"A-Aloha," _a timid voice crackled through the headset. _"A-Are you guys 621 and 627-I mean, Chopsuey and Dan?"_

"Yeah, that's us," Daniel said. "What's your name, cousin?"

Chopsuey looked at the foggy green tank. He could see a tiny, barely visible spot of a lighter shade of green floating around in it.

_"I'm 222. Lilo calls me Poxy."_

"It's nice to meet you, cousin Poxy," Daniel said.

"222?" Chopsuey began. "If I remember correctly, you're supposed to be a living virus, right?"

The answer wasn't immediate. _"Not 'supposed to be.' I _am _a living virus. I gotta stay in here, so I don't make people sick."_

"You can't control it?" Chopsuey asked.

_"I wish...But it's nice to have people to talk to, music to listen to. Do you guys like the Beatles?"_

"They're my favorite." Chopsuey smiled, not knowing if Poxy could see him.

_"Which one's your favorite? John, Paul, George, or Ringo?"_

"Who wrote _Let It Be _again?"

_"That's Paul, I think."_

"Then I'll have to say Paul."

_"Awesome. He's my favorite, too."_

Chopsuey, Daniel, and Lilo talked with their microscopic cousin for some time. Soon, when the sky was going orange, Victoria and Snooty dropped by to ask them if they wanted to go see _Sludge Mummies - Episode III: Revenge of the Pith. _Lilo went, but Chopsuey and Daniel decided to continue their conversation with Poxy.

Chopsuey, in particular, was unshakably intrigued.

_Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare?_

_Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?_

_Is your heart filled with pain? Shall I come back again?_

_"Wow. Sounds hard," _Poxy said.

"Not really," Chopsuey replied. "It just takes practice. I like the bow more than the blaster because you can twirl it around, dance with it. It's good for more than just shooting the arrows. And it just feels good to hold it. Just really satisfying."

_"Man...I wonder if I'd be good at it. If I could...You know."_

"Yeah..."

_"There's a lot of things I think I'd be good at. Surfing, guitar, tightrope-walking..."_

"But not without getting people sick," Chopsuey said. He remembered all the kisses Daniel had given him despite the threat of his cold. He wondered how many kisses Poxy had ever received.

_"Yeah. I wish..."_

"Go on."

_"I...Chopsuey?"_

"Yes, Poxy?"

_"I remember hearing about you back in Jumba's old lab. You're good with science and programming and stuff, right?"_

"Well...I suppose..."

"Yeah, he is," Daniel added. "Before he helped me, I could only say the word 'evil' over and over again."

_"Oh. That must've been hard to fix."_

"It was," Chopsuey said. "Poxy, what exactly are you asking me?"

_"Well...If I make people sick, then there must be something inside me, some cells or a line of DNA or something, that's making me do that, right?"_

"Right..."

_"So, if you could figure out what that was, do you think...?"_

Chopsuey thought. He was transfixed on the light green spot floating in the tank. He was whisked back in time, back to the image of a certain nail-sized pod labeled _627._

"What about that chamber?" Daniel suggested. "The one you used for me?"

"That was different," Chopsuey replied. "With you, and the glitches Flute and Stitch had, it was in the brain. Those chambers can't change an Experiment's body or their DNA. And even then, Poxy doesn't have a body; he's bacteria. No offense."

_"No worries, cousin."_

"The only thing that could augment Poxy would be something smaller than him. Something that could get inside him and remove the parts of him that were causing the sickness."

"Like a shrink ray?" Daniel asked.

"Perhaps. But where would we find one of those?"

_"You could use Jumba's old one," _Poxy suggested. _"It's that little grey blaster-looking thing to the left of the garage door."_

Chopsuey looked. There it was, its needle-like barrel pointed downward as if looking down its nose to say, _'about time you noticed me.'_

_"Jumba used it when I..." _Poxy added. _"When I made Pleakley sick."_

"Okay..." Chopsuey began. "But even then, there'd be more equipment required. Some kind of armor or forcefield to keep whoever went in from getting infected themselves, not to mention a tether to prevent them from getting lost, some sort of navigator..."

He looked around the garage as he spoke, glancing again at each of the abandoned inventions, complete and incomplete ones alike. Somehow, the very things he described seemed to peek out of each of them, as if challenging him to find them.

"What's wrong, Chop?" Daniel asked.

"I can do it," Chopsuey said instantly. "It'll take a few days to get everything ready, but I...I..._AH-CHOO!"_

Daniel was ever vigilant with the tissues. "Hey, don't forget," he said, "you've got to get some rest if you want that to stop happening."

"I can rest after I'm done," Chopsuey retorted.

"It'll only get worse if you work yourself up."

_"You don't get it, Dan!"_ He immediately regretted his tone at the sight of Daniel's paling face.

"I just...I need this. I need to know that...That I can make something better."

Daniel took both of his hands. Chopsuey hadn't noticed how cold he'd felt until Daniel's warm fingers intertwined with his.

"Then, how about this?" He suggested with a soft smile. "You sit in a nice, warm, comfy bed with lots of blankets and some hot chocolate, and you tell me what needs to be done, and I will do it for you. I can be your hands."

Chopsuey sniffed. His fur was getting damp with sweat. He didn't know how Daniel could bear to touch him.

"You sure? It'll be a lot of work."

"What you did for me was a lot of work, too, right? I'm more than happy to do this for you."

Chopsuey sighed. "Okay. But no more kisses until it's done. I don't want you getting sick in the middle of it."

"Aw. Okay...But can I have just one more to tide me over? Please?"

Chopsuey looked into that beautiful, irresistible smile. He'd thought about it every day, but he genuinely didn't know what he'd done to deserve it.

"Alright. Fine."

The two Experiments rubbed their noses together. Although Chopsuey could already feel another sneeze brewing, he savored the moment, giving Daniel as much as he'd need to make it through the next few days.

To be fair, Chopsuey knew he'd need it just as much.

_Tell me, dear, are you lonesome tonight?_

_"Aw," _Poxy's voice crackled from the headset. _"You guys are cute."_

**III**

Chopsuey was baffled by two things over the next four days.

The first was how committed Daniel was to work. It had been a long process, from finding the right components, to building the armor, to constructing the tether, to testing the GPS and the computer, and finally to making sure the shrink ray still worked. (The last of these had led to a harrowing but quickly-resolved crisis involving Daniel swimming in hot chocolate). But Daniel never complained, never tired, and most importantly, never deviated from Chopsuey's directions, no matter how meticulous. For those four days, they were of one mind.

The second baffling thing was how much worse Chopsuey's cold had gotten. He had done everything Clip had suggested. He barely left the bed Nani and David had brought down for him. Daniel had wrapped him in a cocoon of blankets. Most of all, he had consumed what felt like most of the hot chocolate in the known universe. And yet he'd only gotten sweatier, sneezier, and achier of the head.

It boggled his mind even as he went over final checkups with Daniel, who stood by his bed in the jet black anti-bacteria armor.

"Oxygen working?" Chopsuey asked, his voice barely more than a hoarse wheeze.

"Check. Got enough blankets?" Daniel asked.

"Yeah. Tether secure?"

"Check. Hot chocolate warm enough?"

"Yep. Signal activated?"

"Check. Need any more marshmallows?"

"No, tha-_ha-AH-CHOO!_"

"Bless you."

"Thanks."

Chopsuey looked the armor up and down, scanning for even the faintest tear. He kept coming back to the visor, where a translucent blue version of Daniel's face smiled back at him.

"Alright," Chopsuey said with a sniff. "I'll be with you all the way." He patted on the laptop on his bedside table.

"Now, is there anything else you need before you go in?"

Daniel flipped a switch under his chin, whirring his visor up.

"Really? When I'm like this?" Chopsuey gestured at his pale, sweat-dampened face.

Daniel just smiled and shrugged.

"I think the only reason this cold's gotten worse is that it's trying to get you to sto-_oh-AH-CHOO!"_

He grabbed a handful of tissues just in time.

"Okay. C'mere."

"I told you, Chop," Daniel said as they nuzzled. "I love you just the way you are."

He straightened up, about to slide his hands from Chopsuey's, but they kept hold, like magnets.

"You okay, Chop?" Daniel asked. "Apart from the cold, I mean."

"Yeah. Yeah, it's just..." Chopsuey looked up, sniffing again. "I don't think we've been separated since that concert where we..."

"I think you're right."

"Just...Just be safe, okay?"

"I will."

"And thank you. Not just for helping me with all this, but for..."

"I know." Daniel kissed Chopsuey's nose, seemingly triggering another sneeze.

Moments later, Daniel stood on top of Poxy's tank. His eyes followed the tether at his armor's back to the shrink ray. Its thin barrel glared at him.

_"You nervous, Danny?" _Poxy's electric voice echoed in his helmet.

"A little," Daniel said with a sniff.

_"Me too."_

The ray whirred to life, its barrel igniting with a flickering green light. It reached out towards Daniel, encompassing him, blinding him.

He was flying. He couldn't tell which direction, although he assumed he must be going down. All he knew for sure was that he was airborne and that something was tickling him. He didn't know how, since the armor covered him entirely from head to toe. It was making it very difficult to hold it in any longer.

He just hoped Chopsuey wouldn't hear.

_"AH-CHOO!"_

**IV**

Daniel went from flying to swimming. At first, he thought the bright green light from the shrink ray was still on, but he soon realized that the thick, foggy substance he was swimming through was the same color. His arms and legs waded through it like spoons scooping ice cream. He reached behind him, touching the tether to ensure it was still there.

_"Can you hear me, Dan?" _Chopsuey's voice echoed in Daniel's helmet.

"Yeah. I hear you," Daniel replied. He clamped his lips together, imprisoning an oncoming sneeze.

_"How do you feel?"_

"Alright. I'm just swimming forwards through this...Stuff. Am I going the right way?"

_"Seems like it. You've got a ways to go. I can put on some music for you if you like."_

"Ooh. Yes, please. Maybe some Bowie?"

_"Anything in particular?"_

"Surprise me, booj."

With that, Daniel's tedious journey was enlivened by a familiarly hypnotic voice.

_Wake up, you sleepy head,_

_Put on some clothes, shake up your bed._

Daniel owed a lot to Chopsuey, Lilo, Stitch, and all his cousins, but he owed just as much to David Bowie. So many things about the universe seemed so strange to Daniel, from waking up as his new self to his cousins' lives on Earth and now this claustrophobic bacterial world. All these bizarre things seemed insurmountable when Daniel first faced them.

_Put another log on the fire for me,_

_I've made some breakfast and coffee._

But David Bowie changed all of it. He was a champion of the weird and the unknown. He took Daniel by the hand, guiding him through the strangest changes of his life. He showed him that even the oddest things could be accepted, overcome, and, most importantly, understood.

_Look out my window. What do I see?_

_A crack in the sky and a hand reaching down to me._

Daniel thought he was something strange himself. His cousins let him know that he wasn't alone in that, but David showed him that being strange wasn't a bad thing.

In fact, it was wonderful.

Finally, Daniel's hand felt empty space. He pulled himself forward, breaking free of the thick green substance. He expected to step onto solid ground, but his feet found only air. And yet he stayed where he was, wading as he would in the ocean.

He looked at what lay ahead of him. It was enough to even frighten his brewing sneeze away.

_All the nightmares came today,_

_And it looks as though they're here to stay._

Around him was a world of blue mist. It was as if he was swimming in the sky. Some great, red thing snaked by like a bleeding cloud. Dispersed throughout it were huge, round sections, sliding painfully slowly along the trail. They seemed to be guarding an enormous body of purple liquid; it looked like a swimming pool the size of a skyscraper, only Daniel couldn't see the bottom. It rippled and curled as if a million fish were swimming about in it, but no fins ever poked out.

_"You okay, Dan?" _Chopsuey asked.

"Uh-huh," Daniel said before clearing his throat. "You?"

_"Don't worry about me."_

Daniel worried anyway, but not just for Chopsuey.

"What about you, Poxy?" He asked.

_"I'm okay," _Poxy answered. _"Just kinda tickles...But thanks for asking, Danny."_

_"Now," _Chopsuey said. _"We need to find Poxy's DNA, which is in the nucleoid region. You'll have to get past those ribosomes to get there."_

"Okay..."

_"Get by the red stuff, go in the purple stuff."_

"Ah. Alright..."

_"Dan?"_

"Yeah?"

_"If you want me to pull you out-"_

"No. I can do it."

With that, Daniel kept swimming.

_What are we coming to?_

_No room for me, no fun for you._

He swam over the crimson stream. It wasn't quite like swimming in water; even his broadest strokes made him only slightly faster than the misty substance. He felt like he was jaywalking across a busy street in slow-motion.

_I think about a world to come,_

_Where the books were found by the golden ones._

One of the huge, round things passed behind Daniel. Its crimson essence reached out like steam from a kettle, snaring his foot and towing him on its eternal journey.

Daniel swung his leg about and swiped at the mist to no avail. He could feel the heat of his own panicked breaths inside his helmet. He was about to call Chopsuey or Poxy for help when...

_"AH-CHOO!"_

Instinctively, he dove his nose into his elbow. He ended up somersaulting through the air, slipping his foot free of the mist. As he sniffed whatever he could back into his nostrils, he glanced back to find the red substance still reaching out for him. He wasted no time in swimming out of its reach.

_Written in pain, written in awe,_

_By a puzzled man who questioned what we were here for._

The purple pool was even more gigantic up close. It might have been bigger than the entire ocean. Now that he was beside it, Daniel could feel vibrations alongside each ripple. It was as if the pool was some gargantuan sea beast, and its stomach was rumbling at the sight of a tasty snack.

For a moment, Daniel couldn't move. His ears were deafened by the slow grumbling of the purple pool and the ever-faster pounding of his heart. He was trapped in mid-air.

Then he thought of Poxy, who had to carry whatever this thing was inside him every day.

And he remembered what Chopsuey had said. _I need this. I need to know that I can make something better._

Daniel already knew that Chopsuey could do just that. Every day he spent with him was proof. _He_ was proof. It was enough to make Daniel love Chopsuey. He just wished it was enough to make Chopsuey love himself.

He couldn't think about the ripples and the rumbling. He had to keep thinking about Poxy and Chopsuey. He kept them in his mind's eye as he swam head-first into the purple pool.

_All the strangers came today,_

_And it looks as though they're here to stay._

Inside was a kaleidoscope of colors. The patterns swirled over, under, and around Daniel like shooting stars dancing across a sky made entirely of rainbows. They were all so bright.

Then...

_Oh, you pretty things!_

A wave of pitch blackness sped down the kaleidoscope. There was nowhere Daniel could move to escape it. When it reached him, he felt something, a horde of somethings, pressing violently against him, like he'd been grabbed in a giant fist.

_Don't you know you're drivin' your mamas and papas insane?_

_"AH-CHOO!"_

Light and color returned. Daniel looked down at his armor; there were cracks.

How could there be cracks? He'd followed Chopsuey's directions to the letter.

_"Dan!"_

"I'm fine," Daniel said. "I think I've found what's going on with Poxy."

_"Oh. Fantastic. What is it?"_

"This big tunnel; it's his DNA, I think. There was this bit of dark-"

_Oh, you pretty things!_

_"AH-CHOO! AH-CHOO!"_

_"D-a-n!" _Chopsuey's voice struggled to enter Daniel's helmet.

"I'm okay! I..."

Daniel felt a hot wind at his left shoulder and elbow and his right knee and toes. Looking down, he found them exposed as chunks of his armor floated away. The dancing colors' path changed. They drifted towards Daniel's exposed fur just as the mist outside had.

_"D-a-n?!"_

"Chop, I-"

_Don't you know you're drivin' your mamas and papas insane?_

The colors returned, but they were faint in Daniel's vision.

_"That's-...Pulling-...Out!"_

Daniel glanced back. Every inch of his body weighed a tonne. All he could see now were mismatched colors and outlines, but he could make out the tether being slurped back to the surface. He heaved his arm to his back, touching fur where there should have been metal.

He pulled his hand back. Touching his skin was like holding a lava rock, and moving his arm was like lifting a planet.

What little color he could see vanished, but he couldn't tell if it was another wave of darkness or if he'd gone blind.

He thought of how much he would miss Chopsuey, and then his mind went as blank as his vision.

_Let me make it plain,_

_Gotta make way for the homo-superior!_

Something seized his hand. He could barely feel it; it seemed as if his arm had suddenly grown an extension. But what he could feel was burning hot.

He heard a voice but no words. Then he was flying. It was different than before; now he felt like a ship rocketing out of a planet's atmosphere, its hull burning up before breaking into the cold infinity of space.

Gravity suddenly returned. He fell for either a second or a century; he couldn't tell. But something kept him aloft as his feet reunited with solid ground. Moments later, he felt something soft at his back.

And then Daniel woke up. The first thing he saw was the ceiling of Lilo's garage. The first thing he felt was damp.

He sat up, looking down himself. He was on the bed in the garage. His armor was ruined; now only bits of metal scattered about him. His fur hung off of him like he'd just jumped into the ocean. He smelled horrendously sweaty.

But apart from that, he felt great. He was at just the right temperature, he could lift his limbs without struggle, and best of all, no incoming sneezes.

Daniel looked beside him, finding Chopsuey sitting up, just as damp, sweaty, and smelly as he was.

They looked at each other for a while.

"Did you...?" Daniel finally asked.

"Yeah," Chopsuey answered.

"Without armor?"

"Yeah."

Daniel sighed. "I'm sorry...I should've done more, especially with you being so sick."

"Hey," Chopsuey reached out, caressing Daniel's sweat-dampened cheek.

"You've done so much for me. I was more than happy to do that for you."

Daniel didn't know what to say. He didn't want to say anything; he just wanted to look at Chopsuey.

Moments passed, and neither of them sneezed.

They leaned in until their noses touched. Neither of them minded the smell.

They stayed put until they heard an electric sobbing. They got up to investigate, feeling light and airy as they walked hand-in-hand across the garage.

They picked up the headset.

"Poxy?" Daniel said.

_"Danny?!" _Poxy perked up. _"Are you okay?! Is Chopsuey-?!"_

"I'm here, too," Chopsuey said.

_"Oh, thank goodness! I thought I'd..."_

"It's okay, Poxy," Daniel said. "We're okay."

_"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that to you. I just...I don't know..." _The electric sobbing continued.

"Hey, hey, Poxy," Daniel said. "You didn't hurt anyone. Don't worry."

Poxy sniffed. _"Did...Did you find out what it was? Can you fix it?"_

Daniel turned to Chopsuey, who seemed deep in thought.

"Maybe," he soon answered. "First, I need to think, and we both need a shower."

**V**

Chopsuey's brain worked like a machine. He was silent even as he and Daniel came downstairs into Lilo's kitchen cloaked in towels.

The suffocating tunnel of Poxy's DNA was imprinted on his mind, but he couldn't think of a way to repair it. He didn't think he should.

He and Daniel had been sick when they went into the tunnel. They left feeling even worse, but then they felt better. Poxy had done in mere hours what resting and keeping warm couldn't do in several days.

There was just one more answer Chopsuey needed, but he would have to get it from somebody else who'd come into contact with Poxy.

And then he remembered.

He was greeted by a smell and a sound. The smell was heavenly; steamy, hot chop suey. It was almost enough to make him lose his train of thought.

The sound was not as welcoming. The guitar and flute sections were spot-on, but the vocals, it seemed, were performed by a dying rhinoceros.

_"Don't go-ACK-changin' to try and -ACK-ACK-please me-ACK!"_

Chopsuey and Daniel entered to find a table decorated with boxes of takeout. Angel was sat at one end, looking more white than pink. Stitch and Flute sat on either side of her, holding an acoustic guitar and a flute and looking strangely powerless with them. Around the table, Lilo, Nani, and David offered Angel sympathetic looks.

"That's a pretty bad cough you've got, Angie," Daniel said. He and Chopsuey each kissed Flute on a cheek before finding their seats beside Lilo. Now Flute looked more red than yellow.

"Ih, boojiboo," Stitch said. "Maybe naga street shows 'til youga better."

Angel folded her arms, looking cross with nobody in particular. Even her skunk stripe and antennae drooped angrily.

Stitch smiled and licked her cheek.

"Sorry, Angel," Nani said. "Something's going around. I guess it's just your turn."

Angel huffed, blowing her skunk stripe off her eye. It drooped lazily back to its original spot.

"Stupid cold," she muttered. _"ACK!"_

"You seem better, though, Chop," David said.

"Yeah. How did it go?" Lilo asked. "Did you figure out how to fix Poxy?"

Everyone turned to Chopsuey, who thought he might've been able to smuggle a whole box of chop suey into his cheeks before he continued his investigation.

He held a finger up as he chewed. He could feel the anticipation in the room brewing. He wanted it over with as much as them, but this was too important to talk with his mouth full.

"Maybe," he finally said. "But, I need to talk to Pleakley."

Minutes later, everyone was gathered in the living room around one of Jumba's old laptops. A total of five eyes flickered onto the screen.

_"Aloha, cousins," _Jumba cheered.

_"A-Aloha, everyone," _Pleakley said. Chopsuey couldn't help noticing his eyes wandering back and forth from Daniel. At this, he took Daniel's hand.

Once pleasantries were exchanged (which felt as painful a wait as Chopsuey's chewing), Chopsuey cut to the chase.

"Pleakley, have you had a cold since Poxy made you sick?"

Pleakley thought for a while, drumming his three fingers against his chin.

_"Well, last Thanksgiving, I got some really bad-"_

_"That was salmonella poisoning," _Jumba interrupted him urgently. _"Jumba tell you to defrost turkey day before. But you do not listen, Mr. Culinary Arts Minor."_

_"Oh, right. Then, uh, come to think of it, no. That was the last cold I had. Why?"_

Chopsuey leaned back on the couch, pressing his fingers to his lips. That was the answer he'd hoped for, but somehow it still wasn't enough.

"What's wrong, Chop?" Lilo asked.

"I think..." He began. "I think Poxy might be able to cure colds."

"You mean, for good?" Flute asked.

"Maybe. If he could make me and Daniel better, and if Pleakley hasn't had any more colds..." He sighed, rubbing his forehead.

"I just need more information. Maybe-"

"Meega try," Angel said. _"ACK!"_

Everyone turned to her.

"Are you sure?" Chopsuey asked. "Before Daniel and I got better, we felt worse for a while."

_"Yeah, me too," _Pleakley said. _"Lilo and Stitch can tell you all about it."_

"Maybe not," Stitch said, his nose wrinkling at the suggestion.

"Meega sick already," Angel answered. "And...Help Poxy, ih?"

Chopsuey nodded. "Yes. It'll help Poxy."

"Okitaka. Ready when youga."

**VI**

Chopsuey couldn't remember ever feeling this anxious. Even his old plans had never made him feel like this.

It already felt like forever by the time he and his cousins were in the garage. They looked between Angel sat on the bed and Poxy's tank as if they were on opposite sides of a gladiatorial arena.

"You need anything else, Angie?" Nani asked.

Angel smiled at Stitch and Flute. They smiled back, striking up with their instruments as Lilo opened Poxy's tank.

_"Don't go changin'," _Stitch sang, _"to try and please me."_

The tank went from green to clear as something floated out of it. Chopsuey squinted at it; it was a glowing green speck, small even for a firefly. And yet, somehow, he could feel its fear. Perhaps because it was the same as his.

_"You've never let me down before."_

"It's okay, cousin," Lilo whispered. "Whenever you're ready."

Angel smiled, extending her hand towards Poxy.

It took him a minute, but soon Poxy was on his way.

_"Don't imagine you're too familiar."_

He landed softly in Angel's palm, sinking into it. His green light vanished.

_"And I don't see you anymore."_

Stitch and Flute stopped playing.

"How youga feel, booj?" Stitch asked.

"Okitaka," Angel yawned. She wiped her arm across her forehead.

"Hoo. Isa hot...Just gonna..." She lay down on the bed, her words devolving into snores. Each one waved her skunk stripe into the air like a flag.

A green light popped out of Angel's nose.

"Do you remember how long we were out, Poxy?" Daniel asked.

The light flew back to its tank. Lilo brought the headset to Daniel and Chopsuey.

_"About an hour, I think."_

"Okay, then," Chopsuey sighed. "Nothing to do but wait."

He was afraid that the hour would feel like an eternity. It came close. Daniel helped make it shorter. He didn't say much; he just held Chopsuey's hand and smiled. That was all he had to do.

Everyone stayed by Angel's bedside all the while, giving her a somber, impromptu concert. She sleepily hummed along.

"How are you feeling, Poxy?" Chopsuey asked, putting on the headset.

_"Chop...If this works, does this mean...?"_

"If this works, then it can mean whatever you want it to mean." He smiled at Daniel, who smiled right back.

"It's your gift."

He still didn't know what he'd done to deserve that smile. Perhaps it only mattered that he did deserve it.

The hour passed, and Stitch began drawing the improvised concert to a close.

_"I said I love you, and that's forever,_

_"And this I promise from the heart..."_

Angel stirred. Everyone leaped to their feet. Chopsuey swore that he heard Poxy rushing to the glass of his tank.

Angel sat up, her dampness, sweatiness, and smell instantly familiar to Daniel and Chopsuey. She felt her throat, then lit up.

Her voice filled the garage, as it always should.

_"I could not love you any better,_

_"I love you just the way you are!"_

**VII**

_ **KOKAUA WEEKLY** _

_ **Friday, June 23rd, 2006** _

_ **CONSCIOUS CONTAMINANT CURES COMMON COLD!** _

_In global news, sniffers and coughers everywhere rejoice! The common cold, that pesky bug that keeps you from your school, your work, and your life for days every year, finally has a cure!_

_The solution to this worldwide irritant comes in the form of a living bacteria. He's a little guy called Poxy, although 'little' is undoubtedly an understatement. But despite his size and his germy appearance, he's friendly, talkative, and willing to bring his cure to anyone who needs it._

_According to cured patients, the process is simple. Poxy harmlessly enters the bloodstream, immunizing the nervous system to bacteria causing the common cold. The only side-effect is sudden exhaustion and extreme sweatiness. These last for thirty minutes to two hours, based on data collected from patients throughout Hawaii. Once that's done, you can look forward to a life free of sniffles, sore throats, and unproductive sick days._

_We spoke with Poxy, who is about to embark on a global tour, about his services._

_"I want to help anyone who needs it," he says. "I'm not doing it for money or to get famous. I don't think anybody should get sick if they don't have to."_

_Poxy's tour will continue throughout the United States, offering his complimentary services at pharmacies and hospitals in every city. He has also agreed to make house calls. He expects to finish the American leg within a year, and the tour overall by 2009._

_The merry microbe went on to discuss the people who had helped him discover his remarkable remedy._

_"I want to thank my ohana, who always loved me just the way I was. And I especially want to thank Daniel and Chopsuey. If it weren't for you guys, I never would've known I could do so much for so many people. Thank you so much for making me better."_


	14. Episode 13: Heroes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this exciting ish of The Daring Adventures of Ace, the Crimson Crusader must team-up with the dastardly duo of Bonnie and Clyde! Thrills! Chills! Action! Suspense! Don't miss out on this one!
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Heroes" - David Bowie

**Issue 13: ** _ **Heroes** _

**I**

We enter on a day like any other in sunny, serene Kokaua Town. The scorching rays of the Hawaiian sun are tempered by a pleasant breeze blowing from the crystalline sea. It is a perfect day in a place close to paradise.

_"Help! Oh, help!"_

But what's this? A car has suddenly broken down! And right in the path of an oncoming taxi cab! The driver's cries, though powerful and piercing, fail to reach the ears of the woefully ignorant cabbie!

And then, just before the tragic scene can be completed, the broken car is whisked into the air, out of the path of the taxi, and lowered carefully into a streetside parking space.

"With driving like that," a deep, mighty voice calls from above. "He's wasted as a cab driver. He should look into professional racing."

The driver stumbles out of their vehicle, dazed but unharmed, and looks up with gratitude at the beaming, crimson figure flying in front of the sun.

Who is this awe-inspiring figure? This incredible emblem of power, courage, and justice? It is none other than...

_ **THE ASTOUNDING ACE!** _

His daring rescue completed, Ace resumes his regular patrols. Though pleased at the peaceful day being enjoyed by the citizens he so dutifully protects, he is also disappointed by it. For he knows that something much more sinister lurks in the shadows.

"Hm," he muses as he soars faster than a plasma bolt. "I've scoured the entire city, but still no sign of this shapeshifting troublemaker who Lilo and Stitch warned me about."*

_*Better known as Experiment 628, last seen doing battle with the Fantastic Flute in Issue 11! -Ben Stardust._

"As much as I'd like to keep patrolling 'till I find him, I suppose a watched criminal never strikes. In any event, it's time I head into work. Don't want to keep Mr. Kalama waiting."

Following a quick stop in an inconspicuous alleyway, the Crimson Crusader dons a blue suit and tie, a curly brown wig, and a pair of square glasses. He emerges as mild-mannered reporter Albert Colbert Ebert, with the people of Kokaua Town none the wiser.

"Aloha, Ace-Al," local surfer and fire-dancer David Kawena calls out as he passes Albert.

"Oh. Aloha, Mr. Kawena," Albert responds, disguising his deep, mighty voice in a much more sheepish tone.

As he makes his way into the bustling offices of _Kokaua Weekly, _Albert takes care to make a few deliberate mistakes. An awkward stumble around the secretary's paper-filled desk. An accidental bump into the water cooler by the window. Small but critical actions to ensure nobody would suspect that the clumsy yet mild-mannered Albert Colbert Ebert was secretly the astounding Ace.

Just as Albert reaches his desk, a stern voice cuts through the air, seizing his attention.

_"Ebert!"_

"Y-Y-Yes, M-Mr. Kalama." Albert rushes to the editor's desk, zig-zagging as fast as he can (though never _too _fast) between reporters and photographers rushing to and from their desks.

"Where've you been?" Mr. Kalama asks, his grey mustache rising out of a coffee mug reading, _Stop Reading This and Get Back to Work!_

"I was just-"

"Well, you're here now. That piece you did on that little Poxy guy was a real killer. People like readin' about what your cousins-I mean, what those little furry creatures are up to, how they're helpin' people out. So this week, we're doin' an issue dedicated to 'em. We'll have each of our reporters interviewin' one, talkin' about how and why they contribute to our little bit of paradise here."

"Gee, that sounds just dandy, Mr. Kalama," Albert says.

_Gosh, _he thinks, _I hope I don't get assigned to interview Ace. That'd be the most biased article ever._

"Of course it's dandy, Ebert. Everyone's got their assignments already, but I've saved one for you because you're one of our best."

"Oh. Thank you, Mr. Kalama."

"And also because I knew you'd be late."

"Oh..."

"You'll be givin' us a piece on that Finder guy who runs the lost-and-found down at the beach. Sound good?"

"I-"

"Fantastic. I'm countin' on you, Ebert. Now get on it."

"Thank you, sir-"

_"Get outta here!"_

As Albert scurries out of _Kokaua Weekly, _he muses over the prospects of his assignment.

_As much as I'd rather keep searching for 628 as Ace, I can't just abandon Albert Colbert Ebert's responsibilities._

_But hold on! This might be just what I need! Finder is supposed to be able to find anything and anyone. Perhaps he could be a crucial ally in Ace's hunt for 628._

_I'll approach him first as Albert Colbert Ebert. If he's interested in helping, then I can have him rendezvous with Ace later. Otherwise, it might seem suspicious if Ace meets with Finder shortly after Albert Colbert Ebert is assigned to interview him._

**II**

Following a short walk through tranquil Kokaua Town, our hero arrives outside the shack headquarters of _Found Beach Services and Detective Agency, _formerly _Found Beach Services, _formerly _Lost-and-Found Beach Services._

_That's peculiar, _Albert thinks. _It's mid-afternoon on a Thursday, but the windows are shut. There isn't even a 'back soon' note, and I know for a fact Finder can't be sick, thanks to Poxy. This seems mighty fishy._

As the timid reporter investigates the scene, his ears detect voices coming from within the shack. Pressing his ear against the wood, his worst fears are realized as the voices therein reveal their true sinister tones.

"Awright, if ya don't wanna spill the beans, we'll squeeze 'em outta ya."

"Yeah. I think you'll find us very persuasive."

"Naga! Naga beans to spill! Let meega go!"

_Those voices, _Albert thinks. _If they are who I think they are, then Finder's in trouble! I need to get in there and save him! But Albert Colbert Ebert won't be much help to him..._

Sprinting behind the cover of a nearby palm tree, our hero sheds his meek disguise, becoming the astounding Ace once more.

Rushing back to the shack, he pulls a window open, casting his heroic silhouette over the sordid scene.

"What in the-?!"

"How can you stay inside on such a beautiful day?!" Ace announces to the dastardly duo of Bonnie and Clyde, who stand on either side of the intrepid investigator Finder, hung upside-down in a cocoon of rope.

"You?!" Clyde exclaims. "Did Jumba program ya to have awful timin'?!"

"Only to be strong enough, fast enough, and daring enough to put a stop to criminals like the two of you," Ace retorts.

"Hey, hey, back it up, big red," Bonnie responds. "We've turned over a new leaf! We work for Finder now!"*

_*Ever since their titanic team-up way back in our second ish! -Bennie S._

"I sincerely doubt your duties include tying your boss up," Ace says.

"Naga," Finder exclaims. "Supposed to help meega find lost things, naga tie meega up!"

"Have no fear, cousin!" With the speed of a spaceship, the astounding Ace flies between the pair of sinister swindlers, snatching up Finder.

"The astounding Ace won't let any harm come to you!"

But, as the Crimson Crusader soars out of another window, Bonnie and Clyde grab hold of a dangling length of rope trailing behind the bound Finder. The thieves are pulled into the clear Hawaiian sky after our hero.

"Excuse me, sir and madam," Ace calls after them, "but I'm going to need to see your tickets!"

"Don't ya call me madam," Bonnie says. "And you're bein' real quippy for someone helpin' out a real criminal!"

"Wait, what do you mean?"

"That ain't the real Finder, genius," Clyde answers. "It's a fake! Didn't ya get the memo 'bout the shapeshifter?!"

"Meega naga shapeshifter," Finder cries. "Meega Finder!"

As Ace soars ever higher, looking between all his passengers with inquisitive eyes.

First, the detective.

_He's been quite insistent thus far. If he is indeed the scoundrel 628 in disguise, why would he maintain the facade to such an extent?_

Then the thieves.

_These two have been known to strike whenever a tempting opportunity arises. That shapeshifter being on the loose would undoubtedly make for a good distraction._

"I got the memo, make no mistake," Ace responds, "but it seems to me like the two of you are using 628 as an alibi for robbing poor Finder here!"

"Come on, man," Clyde says. "Ya just come into our office and accuse us of all this?! Thought ya were supposed to be a superhero, not a super-annoying-judgmental-trog!"

"Right, I'm sick 'a this guy," Bonne declares. "Clyde, Pinball Maneuver!"

"You got it, Bon!"

Releasing the rope, Bonnie curls into a ball, landing in Clyde's outstretched steel palm. Then, with a mighty swing, the bulkier thief hurls his partner in crime at Ace, scoring a strike on the forehead.

_Holy Moly, _Ace thinks_. They caught me off guard there. Head's ringing like Mr. Kalama's telephone. Need to keep focused...Bonnie's unraveling. If I'm quick enough..._

Reaching out with comet-like speed, Ace manages to seize the descending Bonnie's ankle.

_"Hey," _she snaps.

"Nice shot, you two," Ace declares, "but with my enhanced agility and endurance, I can quickly bounce back from almost anything! Now, see how you like _my _version of the 'Pinball Maneuver!'"

Clyde gets a taste of his own medicine as his accomplice is hurled into him, dislodging his grasp on the rope and sending both thieves plummeting to the beach below.

"Man, where was this guy when we were actually robbin' people?!" Bonnie yells on the way down.

"And now," Ace continues, "with further help from my super-speed, I have ample time to free you, Finder, and to also repurpose your restraints into a handy lasso!"

Holding the freed detective in one arm and swinging the lasso with the other, the astounding Ace flies down after Bonnie and Clyde, snaring them with their own rope.

"Sorry to ruin your plans," Ace says as he lands on the roof of Finder's shack, "but you roped yourselves into this."

"Seriously?" Clyde sighs.

"Alrighty, then, Big-Red-and-Stupid," Bonnie says, "whatever he does to ya, it's your own fault!"

Finder answers her with a raspberry.

"Easy, cousin," Ace says. "They won't be bothering you anymore."

"Taka Ace-Al-Ace," Finder replies, dusting off his fedora.

"Did they hurt you at all?"

"Naga. Meega just come back from beach comb, and they tie meega up."

"Well, I'm sorry your new hires didn't work out."

"Ih. Meega, too."

"On the bright side, soon they'll be safe behind bars where they can't do this ever-" Ace turns back to the captured thieves, only to find nothing but an empty lasso.

"What in the blazes-?!"

"Don't worry. I'll round 'em up for ya," a gruff voice says.

Ace swivels back around to the Finder, only to instead find the mountainous form of Kixx.

"Oh fiddlesticks-" is all Ace can say before Kixx's fist comes down on his head.

**III**

As the bright blue Hawaiian sky fades into crimson dusk, the enormous, black ship of Captain Gantu ascends towards the atmosphere. His cargo contains only a single innocent girl, longing for company, for freedom, and for better days.

If only she knew of the blue-furred hero coming to her rescue, so determined that he would even drive an oil tanker into a volcano.

He would, and he has.

"Hold on, Lilo," the stupendous Stitch says as he rockets towards his nemesis' ship.

"Stitch save youga, and Stitch have perfect thing."

The mighty Experiment crashes through Gantu's window, greeting the towering terror with a triumphant, _"Aloha!"_

"You," Gantu yells, reaching for his blaster. "You vile, foul, flawed little-"

"Naga call names, Gantu," Stitch says, summoning his secondary arms, each clutching one of his secret weapons.

"Just enjoy _these!" _He hurls at his enemy two wrappers containing...

_"Stewardess (c) Winger-Dingers," _Gantu says. _"Mmm. _Such delicious and moist _chocolate sponge cake! _Scrumptious _vanilla icing!"_

While the corrupt captain is distracted, Stitch sneaks to the ship's cargo hold, rescues Lilo, and leaps out of the ship, landing safely on the ground, thanks to his experimental strength and agility.

"Mahalo, Stitch," Lilo says as they walk home. "But do you think Gantu will realize we're gone?"

"Naga," Stitch replies with a wink. "Meega think he like his new cargo better."

_There's no flavor more winning than Stewardess (c) Winger-Dingers!_

**IV**

Ace feels as though he'd only blinked, and yet he suddenly finds himself lying on his back. The warmth of the golden beach is replaced by the sinister chill of grey steel. His body feels stiff as he rises, the energy he seemed to have possessed only moments prior now vanished. The first thing that greets him is the barrel of crimson blaster cannon. It emits the despondent groan of a machine shutting down.

"Have sweet dreams?" A familiar voice asks.

Ace spins around and takes to the air, prepared for a fight despite his aching body. In doing so, he bumps his head on a ceiling much lower than he had expected.

"Oh, blitznak," he mutters. As he rubs his head, he looks down. He is met with a tip of a hat from Finder, accompanied by Clyde and Bonnie.

"What in the cosmos is going on here?" He demands.

"Isa 628," Finder answers.

"Toldja that other Finder down there was a fake," Bonnie said. "He sucker-punched ya and took ya to his ship. We followed him and snuck on board."

"We found you and the real Finder in here," Clyde adds. "These weird ray things were keepin' ya guys frozen."

Ace glanced around the room, finding three rows of blaster cannons.

"Well, if that's true, then that's incredibly kind of you," he says, folding his mighty arms.

"But that's just the thing; how do I know it's true? For all I know, one of you might be the imposter again!"

Finder sighs, his eyes hidden beneath the brim of his fedora.

"If we were," Clyde says, "why would we set ya free? And why would we pretend to be the guys you were just fightin'?"

"That..." Ace retorts with a point of a powerful finger. "Is...A sound explanation..."

"Alright, listen here, ya flyin' thickie," Bonnie begins, stepping forth.

"Ya might be the big strong hero that everyone loves, but that don't mean ya know better than us. I know you were good right outta the box, and it took us a bit longer than most of our cousins, but we're tryin', dangit! We're tryin' our best! And you ain't helpin' us by accusin' us 'a stuff based on nothin' but that we _used _to be bad, even after we rescued ya! So if ya wanna be the cool superhero ya call yourself, then ya gotta prove it the same way Clyde and I gotta prove that we've changed!"

As Bonnie catches her breath, Finder and Clyde both open their mouths, only to shrug.

Ace returns to the floor, his head hung. "You're right. While I was busy fighting you two, all I was doing was helping the very villain I'd hoped to stop."

"Pretty much, yeah," Bonnie responds.

"But I'll make it up to you. You have my word. I'll do everything in my power to be the hero you deserve."

Bonnie and Clyde exchange skeptical looks. Finder clears his throat, attracting the former thieves' attention. Their faces soften at the detective's expectant glance.

"Only fair, ain't it?" Clyde asks.

"Yeah," Bonnie says. "I guess so." She extends her hand towards Ace.

"We'll take down 628 together. We'll show ya what we can do, and you can show us what you can do."

Ace shakes her hand.

"Sounds like a deal. I won't let you down. Not again."

**V**

The Crimson Crusader's newfound allies lead him on a stealthful trek through the ship. Along the way, they pass by several windows offering glimmering views of the clouds and sky.

_I wanted to find 628, _Ace thinks, _I suppose I got my wish._

Soon, our heroes discover the execrable Experiment's quarters. Peering from behind the entryway, they find his gelatinous green form at a towering computer screen, arguing with...Finder?!

"You're completely pathetic," 628 says. "_I _at least spent several hours as 626 before that musclebound hothead found me out."

"Look, I don't know what I did wrong," Finder's doppelganger retorts. "All I did was ask 149 and 150 which channel that detective show was on, and they tied me up."

Ace turns to the smug-looking Bonnie and Clyde.

"We thought up a trick when Lilo told us about 628," Clyde whispers. "Bonnie took the channel dial off our TV and turned it upside-down."

"So the imposter would turn to the channel Finder likes," Ace whispers back, "only to come up with the wrong one. That's clever."

"Bein' good don't mean ya can't still use some dirty tricks," Bonnie replies with a grin.

"Excuses change nothing," 628 says, swerving his pitch-black eyes to the false Finder.

"They're catching onto us far too quickly. We can't keep failing Dr. Hamsterviel like this. We need to be ten times as thorough with our research and performances as we've been already."

"It takes us weeks to prepare extractions as it is," the false Finder replies.

"Better to spend more time for something than less time for nothing."

"So there are two imposters," Ace whispers. "628 and 629?"

"Not quite," a new voice answers from behind our heroes. Darting around, they find themselves faced with their mutual ally, the dauntless Dupe. This Dupe, however, grins with a maliciousness ill-suited to the kindly ice cream vendor they know.

"Aw, c'mon," Bonnie snaps. "That's cheatin'!"

"Well, you're not exactly the living embodiment of honor and fair play yourself, are you?" The false Dupe retorts before turning to Ace.

"Anyway, to answer your query, 262..." With that, he fires a clear blue beam past our heroes and at the original, gelatinous 628. The inky Experiment promptly splits into two identical copies.

"I can mimic many Experiments' powers as easily as I can their voices and appearances," the false Dupe adds.

"So you can increase your numbers," Ace says with a defiant point, "but not your strength. Dupe's cloning ray divides the target's attributes amongst all of its copies, so all you can do is weaken yourself."*

_*As first demonstrated in Dupe's very first astonishing appearance, way back in the 28th ish of the last volume, by Marvelous Maddie and Vigorous Vic! - Beaming Bennie._

"Yes. _Dupe's _cloning ray does that," the false Dupe responds, his grin fading into a glare brimming with impatience.

"However..."

Ace is suddenly seized in a powerful bear hug, then hurled through the air, bringing his head into a painful meeting with the metal floor. Once released, he looks up at his attacker...Another Ace!

"_My _cloning ray has no such faults," the other Ace continues. "Second time's the charm."

Ace takes to the air. Beneath him, he finds Bonnie, Clyde, and Finder each locked in a duel with their own reflections.

"You might be able to impersonate us, 628," Ace declares, charging fists-first towards his doppelganger like a comet, "but there's no substitute for the original!"

But, with flawless timing, 628 reaches out and catches Ace's fists. The steel floor shrieks as his claws dig into it, maintaining their position despite the true Ace's efforts.

The shapeshifter glowers, answering Ace's determined look with a twisted reflection of it.

"We'll see about that," he says.

With that, he brings Ace down with an ear-ringing headbutt. However, the Crimson Crusader, though distorted, swiftly retaliates with a mighty uppercut. The victory is short-lived, though, for 628 comes back with a spinning, back-handed blow.

The courageous cousin and the sinister shapeshifter trade their fair share of blows, taking as much punishment as they dealt. Despite that, they ultimately remain as determined and vigorous as they'd begun.

_628 wasn't bluffing, _Ace thinks. _He's got my strength, my stamina, even my fighting style down to a tee. I'm completely evenly matched._

He glances around at his allies. The two Finders are airborne, pursuing one another about the quarters. The Bonnies continuously restrain and escape the grasp of one another. Both Clydes' metal fists produce a resounding _clang _as they crash.

_It seems the others are facing a similar issue. We may all fight for hours on end, perhaps passing out from exhaustion before anyone makes any real dent in their opponent._

He backs away from his doppelganger but stops when his back hits another. He glances back over his shoulder, finding Clyde and Bonnie looking back at him. Finder looks down from above. All are still trapped in their respective duels.

At that moment, they all have the same idea.

In one swift rotating motion, the four Experiments scramble their sparring partners. Clyde blasts the false Finder out of the air with a scorching blue energy beam from his metal hand. Finder picks up the false Bonnie by the ears, spins her around, then casts her away like an Olympic hammer. Bonnie ducks the false Ace's falling fist, then retaliates with a staggering headbutt to the nose. Ace catches the false Clyde's metal fist, then sends him flying with a blow to the gut.

"Aha!" Ace declares to the downed shapeshifters. "You evenly matched us by taking our forms, but by swapping opponents so we weren't fighting our doppelgangers-"

"I think he knows, bud," Clyde says, "bein' on the receivin' end and all."

"Oh...Sorry..."

"S'okay."

The false Bonnie, Clyde, and Finder melt into blobs of green ink, slithering towards the rising false Ace, climbing up his body and dissolving into his crimson fur.

"Leave this to me," the true Ace declares, flying faster than a laser beam to pin 628.

"I wouldn't try anything else if I were you! Your reign of terror ends here, 628!"

"Fine; let's say you're right," 628 responds, his gruff voice wretchedly paired with Ace's face.

"What will you have actually accomplished? I've been trying to get you all back to your master. He wants to change the galaxy, but he can't do that unless you destroy what's already there. If you stop that, then you'll just continue squatting here. You won't change anything."

"Not at all, 628," Ace begins. "Change happens all the time around here. It may not be tremendous, galaxy-destroying change..." He glances back at his allies and is met with smiles.

"It's much smaller, but that doesn't make it any less meaningful."

"Who are you to lecture me about change when you're still exactly as you were when Dr. Jumba created you?!"

Ace hesitates in his answer. He is reluctant to venture back to those memories, to the lab, to space.

And then he remembers Bonnie and Clyde, and how they were, as they said, trying their best.

_How can I call myself a hero, _he thinks, _if I can't do the same when it matters most?_

"I made a choice," he says. "I don't know anything about all that techno-talk people like Jumba or Hamsterviel throw around. What I _do _know is that you and I and all of our cousins have a choice. We _always _had a choice. I made mine sooner than most, and some made theirs much later than others, but that doesn't mean it's ever too late...And it's not too late for you, either."

"For me?"

"You want to see change? Then you can change right here, right now."

The glaring face of the false Ace began to melt into the inky form and black eyes of 628.

"Or what?" He asks between anxious breaths that betray his stolid voice.

"Or don't," Ace answers. "This isn't a trick. It isn't a threat. It's nothing more or less than the choice you've always had. The choice you always _will _have."

The shapeshifter does not answer. Amid the silence, for barely a moment, Ace sees tears brewing in those coal-like eyes.

And then, finally, as he begins to assume a solid form, he whispers only a simple question.

"You, too?"

The tears are hidden by a sudden assumption of the form of famed acrobat Elastico. Ace is quick to seize the shapeshifter's raising arm, but it does nothing to stop the elongating fingers. They twist and swerve about the ceiling, avoiding Finder, Bonnie, and Clyde's best attempts at seizing or blasting them.

They reach the computer console, striking a button.

Suddenly, the floor opens like a gate beneath the Experiments' feet.

Bonnie and Clyde instinctively grab hold of one another. Finder seizes Clyde's free arm, then attempts to take flight. Sadly, all he can do is slow their descent.

628, meanwhile, thanks to Elastico's rubbery form, slides out of the levitating Ace's grasp. He clings to the wall, reverting to his true form.

_I can't bear to leave this here, _he thinks, _but I can't bear to let my friends down again, either._

"'Til next we meet."

628 regards him with black eyes that mix curiosity and fear, and then the Crimson Crusader can waste no more time.

The water below seems peaceful, soft, and utterly unaware of the tragedy it may soon be the setting for.

_"Clyde," _Ace yells, _"hold Finder and Bonnie close to you!"_

_"What?!"_

Ace's heart misses several beats. _"Hold the others close to you! It'll make it easier for me to catch you!"_

Clyde obeys instantly. However, with Finder no longer attempting to keep them all aloft, they plummet even faster towards the water.

Ace pushes himself harder, further, faster than he even believes himself capable of. His body freezes and burns all at once. For precisely seven seconds, gravity is his archnemesis.

And then his friends are in his arms. For a while, the universe is frozen. A tiny wave splashes his feet.

Ace looks up at the sky as he and his friends catch their breath. 628's ship is nowhere to be seen.

"Drat," Ace mutters.

"Hey," Bonnie says, "We'd 'a lost a lot more than just him if it weren't for you."

Ace smiles. "Always happy to help a cousin in need."

He looks to the sky once more, and the back to Bonnie. "No matter who they are."

**VI**

It is a day like any other in sunny, serene Kokaua Town. The offices of _Kokaua Weekly _are as bustling as ever. However, mild-mannered reporter Albert Colbert Ebert keeps his cool as he sits at his desk, typing out his next article. As his co-workers rush about around him, he is soothed by his radio and the kind words of David Bowie.

_"I,_

_"I wish I could swim,_

_"Like the dolphins,_

_"Like dolphins can swim,_

_"Though nothing,_

_"Nothing will keep us together,_

_"We can beat them,_

_"Forever and ever,_

_"Oh, we can be heroes,_

_"Just for one day."_

And then the reporter is joined by more friendly voices.

"Aloha, cousin."

"Oh. Aloha, you three," Albert says, swiveling his rotating chair to face Finder, Bonnie, and Clyde.

All three are wearing brown fedoras. Clyde holds a basket brimming with fruit.

"We wanted to thank ya for what ya wrote about us," Bonnie says, taking a newspaper out from under her arm.

She flips to an article where the three detectives tip their hats to Albert from a photograph. The headline reads, _A Day in the Life of the Stupendous Sleuths of Found Detective Agency._

"Oh, my, that's very kind of you," Albert says as Clyde places the fruit basket on his desk.

"We also wanted to thank Ace," Clyde says, "but we haven't seen him in a while. Think you could send him our way?"

"If I see him, them certainly. But I don't know why you think I'll see him first."

"Oh...Uh, well, thanks anyway."

"Also want to tell Ace something," Finder says. "Can youga give message?"

"A message for Ace?" Albert asks. "Are you sure you can trust me with something like that?"

"Ih. Meega trust youga."

_Could he have guessed my identity, _Ace thinks. _Regardless, it might only look more suspicious if I refuse._

_"I,_

_"I will be king,_

_"And you,_

_"You will be queen,_

_"Though nothing will drive them away..."_

"Ace talk about choice," Finder begins. "Choice cousins always had...Long ago, back in space, meega make choice..."

Albert fights to keep his expression nothing more than interest.

Ace remembers those years among the stars. He remembers the mere fleeting glimpses of truth, justice, and freedom. And he remembers the grueling chases between himself, his then-unreformed cousins, and the creator who could never accept his choice.

Albert, however, knew nothing of any of it.

"Jumba make meega find Ace," Finder continues. "And meega did. But tell Jumba wrong place. Give Ace more time to be free."

_"We can be heroes,_

_"Just for one day."_

Albert says nothing. The words, _thank you, _reach his lips, and then he remembers who he's supposed to be at that moment.

"I..." He says, "I'll tell him that. And I think he'll say 'thank you.'"

Finder smiles. "Tell him he is welcome."

The detectives bid the reporter farewell. As Albert Colbert Ebert returns to his work, he considers the choices that he and his cousins have made, and those which 628 will make. He feels a warmth that rivals that of the beaming Hawaiian sun.

It is the feeling of hope.

_"We can be heroes,_

_"Just for one day."_

**And so we close the book for now on the Astounding Ace! Check back next ish for a mesmerizing tale featuring the dazzling dream warrior Remmy! Until then, avid readers, never forget...**

_ **Ohana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten!** _


	15. Episode 14: Dream On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While dealing with his own sleep troubles with Drowsy's help, Remmy is enlisted to discover the cause of David's recurring nightmare.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)" by Eurythmics  
*"Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac  
*"Dream On" by Aerosmith  
*"You Make My Dreams" by Hall & Oates
> 
> Poems Featured:
> 
> *"Acquainted With the Night" by Robert Frost  
*"The Land of Nod" by Robert Louis Stevenson

**Episode 14: ** _ **Dream On** _

**I**

_Blam! Zap! Kapow!_

Three perfect laser shots, and the wasp-mummies fall down dead. They hit the ground in time with the music coming from who-cares-where.

_"Sweet dreams are made of this,_

_"Who am I to disagree?"_

One chamber cleared, now onto the next one.

First, the Corridor of Cruelty. Not so cruel once the triggers and the timing of all the traps have been memorized. A long-jump over the trap door, a slide under the launching spikes, and a quadruple front-flip over a series of swinging scythes.

Child's play.

_"I traveled the world and the seven seas,_

_"Everybody's looking for something."_

Finally, up the spiral staircase to the top of the pyramid for the final boss, the colossal Anubis-Scarab. It lets out an ear-splitting roar, spraying black saliva from its canine jaws. Its six insectoid legs stomp along the stone floor like gigantic jackhammers, while its long, shelled body and snarling, black-furred head obscure the full moon above.

It isn't nearly as terrifying the fourteenth time around, even less so with the acid grenades from the hidden chamber on the second level.

The only trouble is its almighty Duat-Beam. It takes a while to charge as a blinding crimson light grows in its maw, but once it's unleashed, nothing can survive it.

However, a well-timed laser rifle blast to the utmost top of its forehead should...

_"Some of them want to use you,_

_"Some of them want to get used by you."_

"Yes!"

The Anubis-Scarab crumbles to dust as its Duat-Beam backfires. All that remains is a straight shot to the Golden Sarcophagus.

The sprint towards it is both reward and torture. It's in arm's reach...

_"Some of them want to abuse you,_

_"Some of them want to be a-"_

And then a trap door opens, leading to a bottomless pit.

**II**

"Come on, man," Keoni snapped as he took off the VR headset.

He blinked as his eyes readjusted to the colorful arcade. It was less so now than when he left it, as the myriad of screens were switched off.

"Sorry, Keoni," Remmy said. "You did great, though. I really thought you would've spotted those loose tiles."

His legless form levitated out of his booth like a grey balloon. He floated to the rear of the purple VR cabinet and began flipping switches. The machine's flashing lights and enticing electronic sounds abruptly stopped.

"Didja have to put in the trap door?" Keoni asked. "Shouldn't the giant Anubis monster be enough?"

"Well, the wasp-mummies don't want you to get their treasure," Remmy answered. "They're not aiming for _enough. _They're aiming for _as much as possible. _But the more they put in your way, the more impressive it'll be when you get past it all."

"Yeah. You're right...Sorry I got annoyed with you. I shouldn't get so into it."

"Isn't that the idea?"

"Heh. Yeah, I guess."

"You'll get it next time. You know the trick now."

"For sure. See ya tomorrow, Rem."

"'Night, Keoni."

Minutes later, Remmy was outside, trading the flashing torrents of lights inside Kimo's Arcade for the warm orange glow of the setting sun. He took in a long breath of fresh air.

He felt his backpack buzz. He reached over his shoulder, pulling his cell phone out of its pouch. He had a text.

_'You get take-out and I make banana bread? -Drowsers.'_

_'Usual? -Remmsers.'_

_'Yes pls. ^^ -Drowsers.'_

_'Got it. Have fun. -Remmsers.'_

Remmy put his phone away, walked four steps, then felt it buzz again.

_'XD -Drowsers.'_

"Thanks, Drowsy," Remmy said.

He finds the Japanese restaurant busier than he'd expected. The small take-out counter, adorned with two glistening gold ceramic dragon sculptures and a ten-year-old cash register, obscures a gaggle of chefs darting about the kitchen. In the ten feet between that and the door are two rows of folding chairs, each seating a customer blissfully unaware of the chaos being endured for their dinners.

Remmy was quick about placing his order. First, Drowsy's...

"A dynamite roll, some chicken gyoza, a few spring rolls, a side of miso soup..."

Then his...

"And a cucumber roll, please."

He took a number and then found a seat beside somebody he recognized.

"Aloha, David," he said.

David nodded.

Remmy glanced around the waiting area, placing his backpack on his lap and drumming his fingers. People came and went, but the place always seemed equally crowded. Two children playing handheld games and their parents reading paperbacks were replaced by a young couple playing cribbage. Belle and Sample listening to their Walkman were replaced by Slushy in his white taekwondo dobok.

Remmy enjoyed the ambiance. He enjoyed small talk with the cousins who came and went. He wondered what they dreamed about, or if they dreamed at all. Sometimes, he considered asking them what it felt like.

He never did.

Something leaned on his head. He looked up to find David snoring away.

_"Number 76!"_

Before Remmy could ask David if he was comfortable, he had bolted upright, taken his hefty paper bag from the counter, and scurried out of the restaurant. He left nothing behind but a feeble "Mahalo."

Remmy couldn't help but notice David's eyes. He'd gotten only a cursory look at them, but they had been baggy, like craters in David's face.

Even after picking up his order, Remmy couldn't help but wonder what had made David so exhausted. Whatever it was, he was sure that David dreamed.

**III**

Remmy was greeted by a smell and a sound as he entered his quaint apartment. The smell was the warm, fruity aroma of homemade banana bread. The sound was snoring. Soft snoring, to be fair, but with no other sounds to be heard, it stood out.

Remmy set his bag down by the door. He looked left to a sink filled with dishes and an oven timer ticking away. He looked to his right, into the living room (or rather, the opposite half of the kitchen), where he found a computer desk. An audio program was still running. At it, wearing headphones and snoozing away, using his arms as a pillow, was a wooly, baby blue Experiment.

Remmy held the bagged dinner up to the Experiment's nose. He purred as his black eyes hovered open.

"Ever the vigilant baker," Remmy said.

"The timer would've woken me up," Drowsy yawned as he stretched his arms towards the ceiling. His voice was as soft as his snoring. Every word massaged Remmy's ears, making him feel as comfortable where he floated as he would've been in the coziest bed in the cosmos.

"I just thought I'd edit a bit of my sleep-aid tape while I waited."

"You could've also put the dishes away," Remmy said.

Drowsy scratched his wooly head. "I was going to when I was done editing, but...Oh, I'm sorry, Remmsers. I couldn't help it. I just sounded so soothing."

Remmy would've been irritated with him (and knew he probably should've been), but that voice killed any glimmer of frustration that peeked its head out.

"Well, you can do it now," he said, "and I'll set our food out."

"Sounds like a deal," Drowsy said as he got to work, all the while looking as though he'd fall fast asleep again on his hooves.

Dinner proceeded as usual. Remmy and Drowsy sat on their futon with their feast carefully organized on the coffee table before them. Between mouthfuls of sushi, the two Experiments discussed potential new challenges for Remmy's VR games and new stories and poems for Drowsy's sleep-aid tapes. Afterward, they had banana bread while watching television, enjoying a rerun of an old action movie.

The burly, gun-toting protagonist raised his weapon, declaring in his grizzly voice, _"Yippie-kai-ay, buzzard-mugger!"_

"Huh," Drowsy said. "That's not what he said the last time I saw this."

And then Remmy yawned.

"Bedtime, cuz?"

"Can't be. Not yet," Remmy said. "What time is it, anyway?"

Drowsy hit the guide button on the TV remote. The screen showed programs beginning at 9:00pm.

"I could stay up longer," Remmy yawned.

"Maybe," Drowsy said. "But it won't do you any good. You need your rest."

"Yeah...You're right." Although Remmy secretly hoped something, anything would happen to keep him awake just a little longer.

His wish was granted by his phone ringing from his backpack. He floated to the door to retrieve it with speed that surprised even him.

The caller ID read, _Pelekai Home._

He answered with an eager, "Aloha."

_"Aloha, Remmy. How was Kimo's today?"_

"Can't complain. Thanks, Lilo."

_"Is Drowsy up?"_

"Surprisingly, yes." Remmy switched to speakerphone, floating back to the futon. Drowsy and Lilo exchanged alohas.

_"Hey,"_ Lilo said, _"I was wondering if you guys wanted to come to a camping sleepover at our place on Saturday night? I'm inviting a bunch of our cousins."_

"Sounds like fun," Drowsy said. "Thanks for inviting us."

"Do we have a tent?" Remmy asked.

"I've got one."

"Right. Of course you do."

"It's a fancy one that pops right up. And I've got a really comfy folding chair with a cup holder and lots of pockets."

_"Cool. See you guys there."_

"Yeah," Drowsy said. "Good night, Lilo."

_"Good night, guys. Sweet dreams."_

Remmy racked his brain for something to say to extend the conversation. Anything that would give him something to stay up for, even for just a few more minutes. But the call ended with a disheartening beep before he could come up with anything.

"That'll be fun," Drowsy said.

"Yeah."

They were silent for a few moments. Remmy's brain fought to find any reason to stay awake despite his eyes' eagerness to close.

"Come on," Drowsy said. "Let's get this folded out."

The two Experiments moved the coffee table down and pulled the futon into its mattress form. Then they went to their closet behind the TV to retrieve their blankets and pillows.

Remmy lay down, pulling his blanket over him. He gazed up at the ceiling, tinted yellow by the lamplight. He felt as if he were in a rocket, anxious for when his familiar surroundings would be traded for the cold, empty void of space.

"How do you feel, Rem?" Drowsy asked, looking enviably snug at the other end of the futon.

"Same as ever."

"What would you like tonight? A poem? A story?"

"Poem, please."

"Any poem in particular?"

"No. You pick."

"Okey-dokey..."

Remmy clung to every soothing syllable. Drowsy didn't speak; he painted with words, words that must have been made for his soft, enchanting voice. His words were hands that guided Remmy through the darkness as he shut his eyes, leaving the waking world, the world that made sense, behind.

_"I have been one acquainted with the night,_

_"I have walked out in the rain and back in rain,_

_"I have outwalked the furthest city light."_

Eventually, Drowsy turned off the lamp. The yellow glow Remmy saw under his eyelids became pitch black. This was the point of no return.

_"I have looked down the saddest city lane,_

_"I have passed by the watchman on his beat,_

_"And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain."_

Remmy soon lost track of Drowsy's voice. He had drifted into some strange limbo where Drowsy was both silent and still speaking. For a while, he thought this might be the night. He may actually sleep as everyone was supposed to; in utter peace.

And then he heard that laugh again.

His eyes snapped open. It was still dark. Deceptively dark, because even though he couldn't see anything, he knew that something was there.

"Drowsy," he said.

No answer.

Remmy broke the silence with his own breathing. Something had to be there, and if it wasn't Drowsy...

"Drowsy," he said a little louder. His voice came out more panicked than he had intended.

"Mmmm...Yeah?"

Remmy exhaled. Drowsy was there. For a little while, that was enough, but soon he had to make sure he was still there.

"What time is it?"

"3:17."

Remmy wasn't sure what to do with that information.

"Hey," he said.

"Yeah?"

"I think I'm gonna stay up for a while."

"Okay...I think I will, too."

Drowsy switched the lamp back on. It seemed brighter than it had before. Remmy glanced out the window beside the futon. It was also darker outside than before, as if the apartment existed in a black purgatory.

"How about some hot chocolate?" Drowsy asked.

"Yes, please." Remmy floated up out of his blanket, joining Drowsy in the kitchen.

As Drowsy put the kettle on, he recited more poetry. Remmy didn't hear the words, only the voice. He stayed close to Drowsy, listening to his voice, watching him smile. He tried to think about him, not about the strange, quiet, dark limbo they would be trapped in.

**IV**

The Pelekais' backyard had been transformed into a camping village bathed in orange firelight. Tents of all colors were scattered about, with the Pelekais' hammock serving as a centerpiece. As Remmy and Drowsy found a spot for their tent, they glanced around at the many activities on hand.

Slushy and Dupe sat in camping chairs by a cooler, handing out frozen treats to anyone who asked. They seemed to never run out.

Sparky took turns giving Lilo and Victoria rides on his shoulders, flying slowly upwards, then down in fast, random intervals. Their screams and laughter were as abrupt as Sparky's ascents and descents. Snooty joined in for one ride, perching on top of Sparky's head, but disembarked looking green.

Elastico and Felix stood on a picnic blanket, teaching Belle and Sample acrobatic poses. Elastico began one with a one-armed handstand on Felix's outstretched palm, then stretched his legs into a series of elegant, looping patterns, as if he were making a signature. Felix followed up by entering the splits and reaching out with his free hand to grab Elastico's ankle.

Belle and Sample looked daunted as they respectively attempted the handstand and the splits. They ended up in a pile on the ground. However, as Belle's ankle had miraculously landed in Sample's hand, they considered their recreation a success. They beamed at their instructors as they basked in their hesitant applause.

"Bootifa, cousins," Elastico said with more effort than he'd expended on the pose. "Great start. Keep it up."

Stitch and Angel reclined against each other on the hammock, playing away at their guitars. Flute sat nearby, joining them with her flute. Angel sang lyrics that made Remmy both eager and afraid to sleep.

_"Now here I go again,_

_"I see the crystal visions,_

_"I keep my visions to myself,_

_"It's only me who wants to wrap around your dreams,_

_"And have you any dreams you'd like to sell?_

_"Dreams of loneliness,_

_"Like a heartbeat drives you mad,_

_"In the stillness of remembering what you had,_

_"And what you lost,_

_"And what you had,_

_"Oh, what you lost."_

At a folding table, Spooky played Monopoly with Kixx, Houdini, Daniel, Chopsuey, Nani, and David. As Spooky scolded an innocently-whistling Houdini for turning one of Daniel's hundreds invisible, Remmy noticed David drifting off. His head was sinking towards his property cards as if they were a pillow. A gentle shake of his shoulder from Nani returned him to the waking world.

Remmy still wondered what David dreamed about. Would he find out tonight?

Should he?

_"Thunder only happens when it's rainin',_

_"Players only love you when they're playin',_

_"Say, women, they will come, and they will go,_

_"When the rain washes you clean, you'll know."_

With their tent up, Remmy and Drowsy joined their cousins. Drowsy was excited to join Slushy and Dupe by their cooler, but less so when Slushy proposed an impromptu taekwondo lesson.

"I'm a lover, not a fighter," was his only excuse as he sank deeper into his camping chair, which was somehow even puffier than his wool.

Slushy responded with a leaping roundhouse kick aimed expertly right over Drowsy's head. His wool waved as if moved by a stiff breeze.

"Wow. That's pretty cool, man," Drowsy said before letting out a long yawn.

"Ih," Slushy said. "Meega teach youga to do it, too."

"Maybe next time. I just got comfy."

Slushy sighed, then grabbed Drowsy's arms and pulled him onto his hooves.

Drowsy blinked in surprise. "Alright, maybe just one quick lesson."

"Depends on youga," Slushy said.

Meanwhile, Remmy helped Sparky out with his thrill ride, carrying Lilo up and down on his shoulders while Sparky did so with Victoria. He tried to focus on the laughter, both his cousins' and his own. He tried to focus on the memories that flooded back to him, of the first thing Lilo had ever said to him.

_It's okay. You made a mistake. It was a bad mistake, but it doesn't stop you from being our cousin...If you want to be._

And yet, with each ascent, he couldn't help gazing at the dark universe beyond the campsite's safe, golden, microscopic boundaries. He couldn't help staring at each box and pillar of light out there. Worst of all, he couldn't help feeling cold whenever he saw one of them go dark. He wondered what made each one go out, although he knew it was probably nothing.

Probably.

Soon, the evening began winding down. Everyone gathered around Stitch and Angel, taking turns singing.

_"Thunder only happens when it's rainin',_

_"Players only love you when they're playin',_

_"Say, women, they will come, and they will go,_

_"When the rain washes you clean, you'll know,_

_"You will know."_

Remmy sang along as best as he could, laughing whenever he fumbled over the lyrics.

Eventually, Nani beckoned him away from the gathering.

"What's up?" He asked once they were hidden among the tent neighborhood. He floated high enough to be level with Nani.

"I wanted to ask you for a favor," Nani said, "but you can say no if it's too much. I'll just go crazy if I don't at least ask."

"What is it?"

"I don't know if you noticed David..."

"He's certainly not as lively as usual."

"Well, you see..." Nani leaned in and whispered, "his grandmother passed away."

Remmy felt something go through his heart. He hadn't felt anything like that in ages, not since he invaded Lilo's dreams.

The last dream he'd had.

"My condolences," he said.

"Thank you," Nani said. "It was a few weeks ago. David's taking it as well as can be expected, but...He's been having trouble sleeping. He says it's just bad dreams, but I can't help thinking..."

"What?"

"I don't know. I'm just worried about him. I know what he's going through. The least he deserves is a good night's sleep. I hate to bring it up, but do you remember how you changed Lilo's dream a while back?"

"I do. And don't worry about it."

"Do you think you could keep an eye on David's dreams tonight, make sure that they're not...Bad?"

Remmy didn't know what to say. The offer excited him because it meant not sleeping, but it also surprised him.

"You really trust me to do that?" He asked. "After last time, with Lilo?"

"We all make mistakes," Nani said. "If Lilo forgives you, then I do, too. And like I said, you can say no if you want to."

"I'll do it," Remmy said.

Nani smiled. "Thank you. That means a lot. Really."

"It's the least I can do."

**V**

Remmy shut his eyes as he nestled into his sleeping bag. Everyone's lanterns and flashlights were still on, casting pale lights that somehow made the surrounding darkness seem even darker. He always thought shutting his eyes before the lights went out would make it less scary when they did, but he was always wrong.

"Hey, guys," he heard Lilo say. "How about Drowsy reads us something to help us get to sleep?"

She was answered with a chorus of sleepy affirmations.

"Okay," Drowsy yawned from his sleeping bag beside Remmy's. Then, even at his drowsiest, he still spoke as serenely as ever.

"Everyone get comfy now. Feel how soft your sleeping bag is, how warm the air is. Feel yourself breathing in," he inhaled, "and out," and exhaled. "Feel your energy, your worries, your anxieties leaving you with each breath. Feel how happy it makes you to be exactly where you are right now, in your soft sleeping bag, in the warm air, with nothing in the cosmos to worry you."

Remmy wished that he could.

"Just relax, let your body shut down, and listen..."

Some of Remmy's cousins were already asleep. He could sense them the way a concert-viewer can feel people jumping and dancing behind them. As Drowsy began his poem, Remmy floated out of his sleeping bag, shrinking and transforming into a ghostly, translucent form. It took him a moment to readjust to it. It was as cold as if he was swimming in fog.

_"From breakfast on through all the day,_

_"At home among my friends I stay,_

_"But every night I go abroad,_

_"Afar into the Land of Nod."_

Remmy walked out of his tent, phasing through it as it rippled around his ghostly form like water. He floated through the dark neighborhood of tents, between alleyways of light and past houses filled with dreams. He could see each dream in his mind's eye, clear but invisible, like somebody else was thinking with his brain. It was almost like dreaming, but Remmy knew it wasn't the real deal. It was only the trial run, and he couldn't afford the full package.

_"All by myself I have to go,_

_"With none to tell me what to do,_

_"All alone beside the streams,_

_"And up the mountain-sides of dreams."_

He spotted pink and purple versions of Elastico and Felix walking upside-down on a tightrope. He saw a red and green Belle and Sample in the front row of a Queen concert set on a rollercoaster. Daniel and Chopsuey were hiding from a dragon behind a giant record player. A blue Flute was planting a garden underwater. Victoria was flying through space on a giant version of Snooty that sang _Space Oddity._

And then there was David.

_"The strangest things are there for me,_

_"Both things to eat and things to see,_

_"And many frightening sights abroad,_

_"'Till morning in the land of Nod."_

He was fire-dancing. That was all.

That couldn't be it. That wasn't it, and Remmy knew it. David's dream didn't come as clearly into his mind as the others had. It was dark, blurry, like a worn-out VHS tape. It was trying to hide from him.

Remmy took a breath as he entered. It was like diving into a pool, suddenly leaving the world of color, sound, and sense, and shutting his eyes. He didn't see the transition, but he knew that everything will have changed when he opened his eyes again. Just like his VR games, only he wasn't in control. No programmer was orchestrating a difficult yet ultimately harmless challenge here. There was only...

Remmy had no idea; that was the worst part. But he knew there was something.

_"Try as I like to find the way,_

_"I never can get back by day,_

_"Nor can remember plain and clear,_

_"The curious music that I hear."_

That alone made it better than sleeping.

**VI**

"Of course. I always get the back row," Remmy muttered.

He surveyed the venue David had chosen for his fire show. The venue itself wasn't familiar to Remmy, but bits of it were. It had the circular layout of Elastico's circus, but the open roof and spotlights from the stadium where Stitch and Angel's band played. The stage was from the luau where David performed, but it was on grass identical to that in Lilo and Nani's backyard. The place seemed indecisive on where tonight's show should occur, so it had split the difference.

Next, Remmy observed the audience, which consisted almost entirely of Experiments, all cheering and whistling and applauding David's many fire tricks. It occurred to Remmy that David didn't have the encyclopedic knowledge of the Experiments that Lilo had. He realized this when he spotted some of the Experiments more than once in different seats. The ones he knew were close to David, such as Stitch, Angel, Flute, Chopsuey, and Daniel, he saw only once, all seated together in the front row. However, he counted three Finders, four Aces, two Belles, six Sparkys, five Dupes, eight Houdinis, eleven Samples, and fifteen Elasticos.

Remmy would have gone on counting had he not noticed something even stranger about the audience. Every so often, a segment of them would freeze, as if they'd been paused. In fact, it seemed the majority of them were paused, and each section took turns moving. Remmy looked closer at David and realized that he was always looking at the audience members that were moving. The cheering, however, never stopped.

The performance itself was impressive. Remmy had seen David's shows before during dinners out with Drowsy, and this dream version was every bit as skilled as the real deal. More so, as Remmy noticed. David attempted tricks unheard of in the waking world. He threw his batons three times as high, did flips that went on five times as long, and once even blew the flames into the shape of a grinning Elvis.

As impressive as it all was, Remmy was drawn to the little details. Sometimes, David would throw his baton too far, but it would somehow blip into his hand when he reached for it. Other times, he would leap into the air in a quintuple backflip, sending his head on a collision course with the stage. Yet, in the time it took Remmy to wince, David would somehow be set upright just in time, sending the crowd into joyous uproar once again.

Remmy thought of one of his co-workers at Kimo's Arcade, who would often pass lunch breaks showing him how to hack video games. He recalled enemies who popped into existence behind walls, NPCs who stood still until the player came near, and entire rooms which assembled themselves from nothing as the player walked to the door. Things that happened behind the player's back to maintain the illusion, but which would shatter it if anyone ever got too nosy. The very same thing was happening here; the dream was only showing David what he needed to see, what he _wanted _to see. Remmy was the hacker, observing everything through his own camera, catching all the flaws in places most players would never see.

Soon, the show concluded. David extinguished his batons with a spat mouthful of bottled water, bowed, then left the stage and vanished behind a curtain under the audience's bleachers. The crowd went crazy, then froze in mid-applause. Their cheers kept going, but their sound became distant.

Remmy floated out of his seat and down to the curtain, half because he wanted to follow David, and half because he couldn't bear another second around the statuesque imitations of his cousins.

Behind the curtain, Remmy found three doors. The middle door had a star with a signature on it; _David Kawena._

The left-hand door had the same name written, but on white paper and in large, painted letters of many colors. Beneath the letters was an assortment of smiling stick people surrounding a silver hook shape.

The right-hand door was sleek and gray. It bore a plaque that simply read in tiny, glimmering letters, _Kawena._

Remmy glanced left and right, finding empty hallways that extended into eternity. It was like looking through the wrong end of a telescope.

Remmy heard a distant, static-filled voice. It seemed to be coming from a radio, but he couldn't spot one anywhere. At first, he thought it was David's subconscious thoughts or an echo from a repressed memory. On closer inspection, he realized it was not David or anyone from his past.

It was Steven Tyler.

_"Every time that I look in the mirror,_

_"All these lines on my face getting clearer,_

_"The past is gone,_

_"It went by, like dusk to dawn,_

_"Isn't that the way,_

_"Everybody's got their dues in life to pay."_

"Didn't take him for an Aerosmith fan," Remmy muttered.

He was faced with a question; which door first? He decided left-to-right was a reasonable order, and so began with the painted door.

_"I know nobody knows,_

_"Where it comes and where it goes,_

_"I know it's everybody's sin,_

_"You've got to lose to know how to win."_

His fur tingled with a brisk sea breeze. Palm trees waved above him, and the gentle sound of rolling waves drowned out Aerosmith's echoing guitar chords. He hovered above sand turned golden-brown by the undulating sea.

He looked straight ahead, finding two people walking along the beach towards him. They gazed out at the sun setting behind the orange sea, seemingly unaware of Remmy's presence. Remmy floated carefully closer, observing them from afar.

One of them was David, but much younger. Everything about him was the same, only smaller, even his fancy hair. He carried a stick, using it to pick up long strands of seaweed from the tide. He held hands with a tall woman with hair similar to his, but longer and silver. She stepped carefully through the white water that swept the beach around her.

Soon, they stopped. The woman took something from around her neck; it was a necklace with a silver pendant shaped like a hook. She placed it carefully in David's eagerly-awaiting hands. He held it just as gingerly as if it were an egg that would hatch into an exotic bird.

Remmy felt warm as he looked on, as he felt the breeze in his fur, as he listened to the purring splashes of the waves. Was this what it was like to dream?

Then he noticed a palm tree a few feet away from David. He saw a figure sitting in its shadow. They were about the same size as David, and they seemed to be holding a book, but other than that, Remmy could only make out darkness. It was as though the figure themself was a shadow.

The sight of it chilled the warmth that had built up within Remmy. It was enough to make him want to leave.

_"Half my life's in books' written pages,_

_"Lived and learned from fools and from sages,_

_"You know it's true, oh,_

_"All the things come back to you."_

He blinked and was facing the doors and listening to Steven again. He hadn't even felt himself being moved. The shift seemed like a response to his thought of wanting to leave.

Remmy was beginning to feel like he wasn't the hacker anymore.

"Alright," he sighed, "what's behind door number two?"

_"Sing with me, sing for the year,_

_"Sing for the laughter, sing for the tears,_

_"Sing with me, if it's just for today,_

_"Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away."_

The door had seemed like that of a dressing room, so Remmy was surprised to find one inside. It was a simple room, containing little more than a miniature fridge, a rack of spare fire batons, and a table adorned with framed photographs. As Remmy entered the room, he found that the pictures were moving. Within their frames, Lilo, Victoria, and their classmates performed a hula routine on stage. Stitch and Angel played guitar in their Halloween costumes of Elvis Presley and Ziggy Stardust. Nani and David were engaged in a water hose duel around Nani's soap-soaked car. And there was the silver-haired woman from the beach, merely smiling. There was one more frame, but it was blurred like an out-of-focus camera lens.

And, of course, David himself sat in a chair beside the photographs. His forehead rested on his palm. Even in his dream, even after the extraordinary show he'd put on, he still looked exhausted.

"How you holding up, Dave?" Remmy asked.

David looked up at him with sunken eyes, then back down.

"I'm sorry about your grandmother," Remmy said. "But you still have your ohana. Nani and Lilo and Stitch and Angel. And all of us. We're all here for you, man. You don't have to go through this alone."

"I know," David said. "Of course I know. This is the tightest ohana I know, and I can't believe I'm lucky enough to be a part of it. I just wish..." His gaze wandered towards the blurry photograph.

"What?"

"...I wish he could say the same about me."

"Who?"

David didn't answer.

"Who, David?"

Nothing.

If David wouldn't answer, then there was only one other place to look.

_"Sing with me, sing for the year,_

_"Sing for the laughter, sing for the tears,_

_"Sing with me, if it's just for today,_

_"Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away."_

The sleek door seemed to stretch as Remmy approached. It might've been opening wide to swallow him.

Inside, Remmy found wooden floorboards bearing rectangular shadows from blinded windows. Most of the room was in darkness, but he could make out frames on the walls, all containing documents that looked both important and confusing. There was also a desk. It looked cheap, but the papers and pens on it were meticulously organized. They might've been glued to it.

Remmy ventured further inside, looking closer at the frames. Each of them threw a name at him in bold, eloquent print.

_Jason Kawena._

David was here as well, but his back was to Remmy. He wore a bright blue jacket that would've looked casual on somebody else, but still seemed too formal for David. He faced the other side of the desk, which was hidden in total darkness.

But Remmy knew there was something there. There was always something there.

A voice growled at David from the shadows. It was deep, throaty, and rang alongside a wretched screech like claws scratching anxiously against wood.

_"Do you understand what kind of opportunity we have here, Dave?! People are already coming here! There's _interest! _Paying off a loan will be child's play! We just need to get the place built, staffed, and we're golden!"_

"You don't know if it'll be that easy," David said. "You might like being cooped up behind a desk all day, but I can't take anymore! I did more than enough of that in school and helping you with all your other plans!"

_"That's _life, _Dave. Somebody has to sit behind those desks."_

"Well, I don't want it to be me! We have a beautiful island out there! I want to do something that'll let me _see _it, let me be a _part _of it! I don't want to make just another big box that'll let people who don't even _live _here enjoy _some _of it!"

_"So you just want to keep going surfing and spitting fire for anyone who'll look up from their loco moco?!"_

"Better than sitting in a dark room, looking at numbers on paper while somebody else is doing something they actually enjoy!"

_"You won't make anything of it, Dave!"_

"But I'll feel a lot more than you!"

With that, David turned and stormed towards the door, towards Remmy.

_"Dream on,_

_"Dream on,_

_"Dream on,_

_"Dream until your dreams come true!"_

Remmy in the hallway again. He darted towards the office door and seized the doorknob. Locked. He tried the dressing room. Also locked.

Remmy gritted his teeth. Why did that creature have to be in there? Why couldn't it have been as simple as reminding David that his family would help him? Why couldn't he have just fixed it with a few words, the way Drowsy always did?

He knew why. Because the more that was in his way, the more impressive it will seem when he gets past it all.

He thought of what he would do if this were one of the games at Kimo's. He would retrace his steps, look for something he might've missed.

He went back through the curtain, returning to the stage. The cheering had stopped, and the audience was now allowed to move of their own free will. Remmy noticed several empty seats, but no duplicate audience members. They all looked at him patiently, expectantly. He was a player now. What did a player do when they were stumped? Talk to the NPCs and ask for hints.

"For David's next trick," Remmy declared, "he will need a volunteer from the audience!"

An arm shot up from the center of the front row. It was an audience member Remmy hadn't noticed before.

It was Nani.

"Right this way, Nani," Remmy said.

Nani followed Remmy behind the curtain, leaving behind a thunderously applauding crowd. Before Remmy could even explain the situation, Nani had opened the dressing room door, unlocking it seemingly by touch.

"I'm glad at least one of us knows what to do," Remmy said.

David was precisely where Remmy had left him. Nani stood beside him, gently lifting his head up.

"I can't go in there," David said.

"Yes, you can," Nani said.

"He won't want to talk to me."

"He will. And you want to talk to him, don't you?"

"Yeah..."

"Why didn't you tell me about him?" Nani asked.

David didn't answer immediately. "I thought you'd be disappointed in me. Your family's been through things I can't even imagine. But you all got through it. You're all...Amazing. I just...I was afraid of what you'd think of me if you knew that I couldn't do the things you've done."

"Trust me," Nani said, "you're not the only one who's gotten into fights with their sibling. And you're not the only member of this ohana who's kept secrets. And most of all...Do you need me to say it?"

David chuckled. "And him...I know he's hurting. I want to talk to him, but I don't know if I'll just hurt him even more...Like last time."

"You won't." Nani stood up, taking David's hand, and guiding him gently out of his chair.

_"Dream on,_

_"Dream on,_

_"Dream on,_

_"Dream until your dreams come true!"_

Remmy led them next door, to the tall gray office of Jason Kawena.

David breathed in and out. "Why do these things have to be so scary?"

"You'll get it this time," Remmy said. "You know the trick now."

"Yeah," David said. He squeezed Nani's hand as she opened the door.

Remmy followed close behind as they entered the dark office. It had changed. The hardwood floor had been upgraded to green carpet. The desk was newer, sleeker, and adorned with even more calculated placements of papers and pens.

The darkness behind it was just the same.

David breathed in. "Aloha, bro."

There was the muffled screech of claws scratching carpet. The floor shook as something in the shadows stepped closer and closer. Each one was like a tremendous fist striking the ground, harmonizing with the echo of Steven Tyler's melodic, incessant demands to _dream on, dream on, dream on!_

Remmy watched the darkness. Each quaking step made him want to flee, to consider his part in this dream over and done, and return to the waking world. But he clenched his sweating fists, barely blinking as he stared the darkness down. He knew that if he left now, he would only be back in the darkness. At least here, he would finally know what it had been hiding. He would know what was there.

Something had to be there.

The creature stepped into the light. Its quaking steps became silent. Beside the desk stood a young man who was nearly the spitting image of David, but in a grey suit and with much shorter black hair.

"Aloha, Dave," he said. "Can I get you something to drink?"

**VII**

_"Got it!" _Keoni cheered as he threw off the VR headset.

"See?" Remmy said. "I knew you could do it."

As Kimo's shut down for another day, Remmy floated outside and took in a long breath of fresh air. He enjoyed it more than he had before. The air felt cleaner, warmer, although he was sure nothing about it had changed. He was only noticing it now.

"Another day, another dime?"

Remmy was surprised to find a certain wooly Experiment approaching him, listening to a CD player.

"What brings you to the land of the living?" Remmy asked.

"Thought you might like to have dinner out tonight," Drowsy said.

"You mean _you _wanted to have dinner out tonight."

Drowsy smiled and shrugged. "Unless there was something else you wanted to do."

"I thought I might have a nap."

Drowsy chuckled. Then, as Remmy kept silent, his black eyes widened. It was the most awake Remmy had ever seen him.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Would I lie?"

"No, but I didn't think you'd take a nap, either."

"I feel a little tired. But you know what? I _have _been craving Greek today. I think I can stay up for another hour or two."

They went on their way. Remmy felt anxious as they walked. He'd felt that way around Drowsy for the past two days. He wasn't sure why their walk had been the tipping point, but as the words tumbled out of his mouth, he was glad that it had finally come.

"Hey, Drowsers?" He said.

"Hm?"

"I just wanted to say thanks."

"For...?"

"For everything. I know I'm not the best roommate. I've cheated you out of a lot of full nights' sleeps, probably interrupted a lot of really great dreams. You don't have to help me with my weird, annoying sleep habits, or lack thereof, but you do. And honestly, I think they'd drive me nuts if it weren't for you."

Drowsy stopped and pulled Remmy into a hug. Remmy was surprised, but he accepted it. Drowsy's wool was as soft as his voice.

"Everyone deserves a good night's sleep," Drowsy said. "That's what I'm here for."

They were soon seated at Drowsy's favorite Greek restaurant. From their streetside table, they browsed their menus, enjoyed the warm breeze, and listened to Drowsy's CD player.

_"What I want, you've got,_

_"And it might be hard to handle,_

_"But like the flame that burns the candle,_

_"The candle feeds the flame,_

_"Yeah, yeah,_

_"What I've got's full stock,_

_"Of thoughts and dreams that scatter,_

_"Then you pull them all together,_

_"And how, I can't explain."_

As Remmy's gaze wandered, he spotted David sitting a few tables away. He stood up as somebody approached his table. Remmy thought he was a waiter, but then he recognized the gray suit and the short hair. It was an odd flavor of deja vu, like receiving a Christmas present after having peeked at it.

"How are you not boiling in that?" David asked.

"Never said I wasn't," Jason said.

They stood there for a moment, looking like reflections of one another. Remmy imagined a sci-fi premise about a man meeting a parallel universe version of himself. Perhaps something for his next VR game.

_"Well, well, well, you,_

_"You make my dreams come true."_

The two brothers hugged. The argument that Remmy had witnessed between them in the dream might have been just that; a dream.

David caught sight of Remmy from over his brother's shoulder. He held up his thumb and pinkie. Shaka.

Remmy returned the shaka.

He was looking forward to that nap.

_"Well, well, well, you,_

_"You make my dreams come true."_


	16. Episode 15: Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hammerface, Heat, Plasmoid, and Thresher's trip takes them to New York City. Will the City That Never Sleeps have what they're looking for?
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Theme From 'New York, New York'" by Frank Sinatra  
*"Dancing in The Dark" by Bruce Springsteen  
*"Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters" by Elton John  
*"In My Life" by the Beatles  
*"New York State of Mind" by Billy Joel

**Episode 15: ** _ **Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters** _

**PLASMOID**

There it was, a magnificent silver beacon shining on the ocean. Skyscrapers rose from it like trophies glimmering on the shelf of a superhuman athlete. In the orange glow of dusk, its lights were already coming on, making the whole place sparkle like a long-lost horde of treasure.

And all Heat had to say about it was, "why is it called the Big Apple? It doesn't look anything like an apple."

"Maybe it's not that kind of apple," Thresher said.

"What other kinds of apples are there?"

"I don't know, man. I'm still tryin' to find out what happened to Old York."

Plasmoid tried to ignore the dismissive comments from his laser-headed and spike-fisted cousins. He'd been waiting for this moment for months, and he wasn't going to let anything spoil it. He scuttled closer to the ferry's railing, basking in the breeze and the view. Only two words were on his mind as the city came ever closer to his reach, and they weren't Big Apple, or Empire State, or Five Burroughs, or Melting Pot.

They were Frank Sinatra.

To Plasmoid, there was no image more perfect than Ol' Blue Eyes in one his trademark suits, sending the classiest place in town into roaring applause with his smooth, swinging voice. And somewhere in that shining metropolis was the place where it all began; the Paramount Theatre. The thought of standing in those hallowed halls, of being that close to Frankie, had gotten Plasmoid through every dull city he and his cousins had passed through so far.

Somehow, now that he was so close to it, the waiting became more torturous than ever. The ferry may have been treading through molasses, and the city might have been dangling from a stick attached to the ferry's roof. As much as Plasmoid loved the sight of the city, it was driving him crazy. He needed to find some other way to pass the time.

He scuttled around the deck, past people in suits and jackets with large suitcases. They were all leaning against the railing, admiring the sluggishly approaching city. Plasmoid didn't know how they could bear the suspense.

Soon, he found a piano. A light brown, well-varnished wooden standing piano, just sitting there against the ferry cabin like a lost child. Plasmoid couldn't believe anyone could just leave it there, even for the view of the city. It was too good to be true. Now, if only he could find...

There he was, leaning against the railing like all the other passengers. Unlike them, however, his chin rested on his folded arms, and he seemed more drawn to the water than the city.

Plasmoid scurried over to him, eagerly tapping him on his clawed foot.

"Hey, Hammy-"

_"Ow," _Hammerface said, turning his namesake head down to his cousin.

"Careful, Plas. You almost took my leg off."

"Sorry, it's just-Did you see the piano they have here?"

Hammerface glanced at the instrument across the deck.

"I don't think we're allowed to touch it," he said.

"It doesn't have any signs on it," Plasmoid said. "I think it's there for people to play and everyone's just too shy. Or they just don't know how to play. Or they just don't want to."

"And you want me to play something?" Hammerface folded his arms. He looked stern as if he had some important daydreaming to get back to.

"I mean..." Plasmoid said. "If you want to. I thought you could play the piano and I could sing, just for fun. Just to pass the time."

Hammerface sighed. "Sure."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Why not?"

"Oh, wonderful. Thanks so much, cousin."

Hammerface slid onto the piano's stool like he was getting into the back of a dusty old taxi. The sight of him confused Plasmoid; didn't he realize what a spectacular gift he had?

As Hammerface tested a few notes, Plasmoid thought he would try to cheer him up.

_"Bang-bang, Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon his head..."_

Hammerface looked at him like he'd just thrown litter in his piano.

"Sorry," Plasmoid said, his head and his tail drooping in shame.

"What do you want me to play?"

"Uh...Frankie's New York song, please."

"Alright."

"Hey, I really am sorry. I wasn't thinking."

Hammerface sighed again. "It's okay. I don't blame you." His claws rose to meet the piano keys. They hovered like a cowboy's gloved hands over holstered revolvers.

"I blame Paul McCartney."

With that, Hammerface got started. The instant that the music reached Plasmoid's ears he was reinvigorated. He felt energy flowing through his face, down to his six pincer-like legs, and up to the tip of his tail. There was, of course, plasma flowing through him, but he knew this wasn't it.

He liked to think it was the spirit of Ol' Blue Eyes.

_"Start spreadin' the news,_

_"I'm leavin' today,_

_"I want to be a part of it,_

_"New York, New York!"_

Perhaps what he liked most about Frankie was that he could sing like him. He had a deep voice that he used to hate; it wasn't the same voice that he heard his thoughts in. But once he discovered Frankie, he couldn't go back.

_"These vagabond shoes,_

_"Are longin' to stray,_

_"Right through the very heart of it,_

_"New York, New York!"_

Some of the other passengers were finally torn from the view of the Big Apple. They watched the performance initially with looks of befuddlement. Plasmoid had seen those looks enough times before; he knew the sight of a dog-sized alien scorpion singing Frank Sinatra was a bizarre one on Earth. Now that he thought about it, a dog-sized alien scorpion probably seemed bizarre enough on its own. The Sinatra part was just bizarre icing on the bizarre cake. They likely hadn't expected him to sound so much like Sinatra, but he couldn't help that. He didn't know what a dog-sized alien scorpion was supposed to sound like.

_"I want to wake up,_

_"In a city that doesn't sleep,_

_"And find I'm king of the hill,_

_"Top of the heap!"_

Eventually, the audience got over their befuddlement and simply enjoyed the performance. Plasmoid played to them, swaying on his pincer legs like he'd seen Frankie do in reruns of his televised shows. The passengers swayed with him, waving in harmony with his voice and the ocean waves.

_"These little town blues,_

_"Are melting away,_

_"I'll make a brand new start of it,_

_"In old New York!"_

But he knew it wouldn't be possible without Hammerface. His playing was the secret ingredient that made the whole show come alive. The spice that made people hear Sinatra more than they saw the dog-sized alien scorpion. Plasmoid swayed in Hammerface's direction as often as possible, ensuring that the audience equally appreciated their singer and their pianist. As he did, he was drawn to Hammerface's smile. He liked hearing him play, and he liked seeing him smile. As the days went by, one was becoming ever more dependent on the other.

_"If I can make it there,_

_"I'll make it anywhere,_

_"It's up to you,_

_"New York, New York!"_

Plasmoid finished with a wink while Hammerface concluded with a majestic assortment of improvised notes. The dozen or so people who had gathered to watch were generous with their applause. Plasmoid bowed, only then noticing a paper cup filled with folded bills and coins.

"You're too kind," Plasmoid said. "Thank you, and have a beautiful day!"

Hammerface picked up their earnings, and they met back up with Heat and Thresher.

"At this rate," Thresher said, peering into the cup, "we might be able to afford the worst hotel in the city."

"I'll be happy just to be _in _the city," Plasmoid said. "Think of all the music that's been made here. We'll get to see _history!"_

"Yeah..." Heat said, drifting back towards the view of the city. Transfixed by its majesty, of course.

"Do you think we could stay here longer than normal, Ham?" Plasmoid asked. "Maybe more than a week?"

"Depends how things work out for us here," Hammerface said, folding his arms. "If we can get some good jobs that stick, then yes. But we still have to look out for each other. Just because it's New York City doesn't mean we can afford to give it more of a chance than any other city we've tried so far. It might work out, and it might not."

"It will..." Plasmoid could finally bear to look back at the city. It towered over him now. He thought, if he could climb any one of those skyscrapers, he would reach outer space.

"I know it will."

"Excuse me?"

A rapid-fire voice seized the four Experiments' attention. They turned to find a brown-mustached man in square glasses and a suit that seemed to be made from a chessboard.

"Stunning show, boys. Pure magic. One of the best I've seen all year." He spoke so fast that the Experiments didn't process what he said until he'd stopped talking. He might have been speaking faster than the speed of sound.

"I don't suppose you have your own agent?"

Plasmoid, Thresher, and Heat blinked.

"No," Hammerface said once his ears caught up with the man's mouth. "We usually just play for room and board wherever we can."

"Well, how'd you like to play for more than just room and board?" The man conjured a card seemingly from thin air and handed it to Hammerface. It read, in big, glimmering letters, _Ben Fanning, Baruchel Talent Agency._

"When you say 'more'...?" Hammerface asked.

"I have a few venues that would really be brightened up by some fresh talent like yours. You come down to the office with me, we can sign you up and have you playing somewhere this weekend. I can even see about bookin' you guys a decent place to hang your hats 'till then."

"We don't have any hats, though," Heat said.

"Could we play at the _Paramount_?" Plasmoid piped up. "Like Sinatra?"

Fanning scratched his head. "I could look into it for ya, but I don't think you'll get the same response as ol' Frankie did in some office building."

Plasmoid blinked. He must've misheard Fanning at his breakneck talking speed. "Come again?"

"The _Paramount _went down ages ago," Fanning said. "Got turned into an office building. Waste of a cultural landmark, if you ask me, but it ain't up to me what stays up and what goes down."

Plasmoid turned again to the city. Somehow, it felt emptier than before.

"I thought you'd have known that, Plas," Thresher said.

"I, uh..." Plasmoid said. "The Sinatra biography I read said he debuted at the _Paramount, _but...Now that I think about it, it didn't say what happened to the _Paramount _after that."

"Still," Hammerface said to Fanning, "thanks very much for your offer."

As they carried on discussing business, Plasmoid remained drawn to the city. His gut writhed with a mixture of excitement and fear. Even without the _Paramount_, he was still ecstatic to be here in the world's greatest city.

But he couldn't help wondering what else it might be missing.

**HEAT**

Heat dragged his suitcase into his sixth-story hotel room. As he locked the door behind him, he imagined how happy he'd be to never sign another sheet of paper again.

He paced over the crimson carpet, flexing his sore right hand. The lights made the place glow like gold. He sat on the bed, which the clerk had described as 'a single.' Heat thought it might actually be large enough to hold all six-hundred-and-twenty-eight of his cousins and still have room to spare.

It was probably big enough for Gantu.

The television was just as huge. Even the monitors back on Gantu's ship weren't so big.

Heat shook his head. He didn't want to think about that ship.

He knelt down and rooted around his suitcase until he found his portable CD player, headphones, and burner phone. He knew just what would cheer him up.

He hit play on his CD player. He suddenly remembered where he'd left off.

"Oh," he said, "it's _this_ song."

He didn't quite get this song. It was delightfully catchy; the drums and synthesizer always made him want to get up and dance.

But then the lyrics would kick in...

_I get up in the evening,_

_And I ain't got nothin' to say,_

_I come home in the morning,_

_I go to bed feelin' the same way!_

As he dialed on his burner phone, he thought about switching to a different track, but that catchy rhythm kept him at bay. This song was a trap.

_I ain't nothin' but tired,_

_Man, I'm just tired and bored with myself,_

_Hey there, baby,_

_I could use just a little help!_

"How do you do it, Bruce?" He muttered as he waited through the dial tone. "You maniac."

Midway through the wait, he became aware of his heel drumming on the carpet. He told it to stop, but it started right back up seconds later.

_"Congratulations! You are caller number ninety-thousand-nine-hundred-and-ninety nine! You've won a free vacation to New York City!"_

"Can you imagine?" Heat said, grinning. Somehow, he could feel Kixx grinning back through the phone.

_"So, what's it like? Is it like in the movies?"_

"A little. There's a lot of lights, though, even late at night. I think I might need sunglasses here more than I did back in Hawaii."

_"Guess that's why they call it the City That Never Sleeps, huh?"_

Heat blinked in realization. "Oh, yeah...Anyway, what's up with you?"

_"Same as yesterday."_

"Heh. Guess so. Things still good with Flute?"

_"Yeah. She came to see me in the circus today. Even stopped by my dressing room after to lend me some of her Zep CDs."_

"Aw. That's fantastic."

_"Where you guys playin' now?"_

"Some fancy hotel called the _Statler. _Hamm and Plaz got spotted by this talent agent who wants us to do some gigs in some classy places to jumpstart our popularity...Or something like that. I was in and out while we all signed a bunch of contracts. I feel like I wrote my name enough times to fill a dictionary."

_"Just be glad your name's nice and short. I bet Hammerface wrote a couple dictionaries."_

"That's true. Now I feel kinda bad for him," Heat chuckled.

_"You guys gotta do your own stuff. That's what Stitch and Angel do. They just set up gigs and play. I mean, I think there's a little contract stuff they have to do, but way less doin' it themselves than if they had another guy doin' it."_

"Well, Stitch and Angel don't have to pay for room and board." Heat wandered over to the window, gazing out at the lights and cars and people blinking and speeding by like tiny silver orbs in a giant pinball machine.

"We've got more than just the fun to worry about. If we don't catch on somewhere after a few days, Hamm wants us to move on."

_"You think it'll be different now that you've got this agency guy choosin' where ya play?"_

"Maybe. Haven't tried it this way before. Maybe he's what was missing."

_"Maybe."_

"Maybe."

Heat's eyes suddenly locked onto something smothered by all the lights. It was a man. He was lying against the corner of a building near an alleyway, draped in a ragged brown blanket barely bigger than his torso.

_"You know," _Kixx said, _"if it doesn't work out this time around, you could come back."_

Heat sighed. "I gotta stick with the others."

_"Well..." _Kixx began, then faded out.

In the silence, Heat became ever more fixated on the man and his blanket. People walked past him, some on their phones, some carrying paper bags, some stumbling about arm-in-arm. None of them noticed him. He was invisible to everyone except Heat.

"What?" Heat said.

_"You can come back if you wanted. I mean, if _just _you wanted. The others could keep on going, and you could come back here."_

"I don't know...What about 'nobody gets left behind' and all that?"

_"You wouldn't be leaving them behind. Sometimes cousins just go and do different things, to different places, but that's not the same as leaving them behind. And you could still call them like you do with me."_

Heat kicked the wall beneath the window. The resulting throbbing in his toe only made him feel more frustrated and more stupid.

"I'm sorry," he said. "That made it sound like I was leaving you behind."

_"You call me every day. That doesn't feel like getting left behind to me...I'm sorry, too. That was a pretty big ask."_

"It's okay. You did say 'if I wanted.'"

_"Yeah...But I meant for it to sound like I was asking."_

"Oh..."

_"I miss ya, man."_

"I miss you, too."

The man tugged on his blanket, trying in vain to wrap himself entirely in it. He looked cold. Heat wondered if anybody out there in that giant pinball machine missed him.

_"There's stuff I wanna do with ya. I wanna go to the gym with ya, see movies with ya, go surfin' with ya. I wanna see ya in the audience at the circus. And I wanna be able to talk to ya anytime, not just for an hour or two every night."_

Heat blinked rapidly, hoping it would keep the tears in his eyes. It didn't.

"Me too."

_"I like...I like talkin' to ya, man."_

Heat wondered if anybody liked talking to the man on the street. He wondered who the last person to talk to him was.

"I'll talk to Hammerface about it," he said. "About me goin' back."

_"You sure?"_

"Yeah. I don't know what he'll say, but I'll ask."

_"Okay...Hey, I know you guys have been through a lot together, but you're free now. You don't have to go where he goes if you don't want to."_

"I know..." Heat rubbed his eyes. "I just wish I didn't have to choose."

_"I wish that, too, man. I'd trade in all my strength if it meant I could get save-Heat-from-...Making-...Difficult-choices-...Powers..."_

"Easily the best power," Heat said, breathing carefully in case he let out a sob.

_"Easily...Well, I'll let you get to that, then."_

"Okay."

_"You hang up first."_

"Oh, come on. Don't do that."

_"Alright, alright."_

They both laughed. It made more tears fall from Heat's eyes.

"Hey."

_"Yeah?"_

"...Good night." That wasn't what his brain had told his mouth to say. Drat.

_"Good night. Talk to ya tomorrow."_

"Of course. Aloha."

_"Aloha."_

There were two beeps, and then it was just Heat and the man on the street.

He felt his cheeks. He hadn't realized how much he'd been crying.

He should get to bed.

His eyes were heavy, but he couldn't tell if it was because he was tired or because of many tears they'd spat out. He guessed the latter because he just couldn't get to sleep.

He usually thought about Kixx as he drifted off to sleep. Nothing in particular about him, just his face. But tonight, he couldn't stop thinking about that man.

There were hundreds of people in this hotel and thousands on this street. There were millions in this city and millions more in this country. There were billions of people on this planet, trillions in this galaxy, trillions of trillions in this universe, this dimension, this plane of existence. So why did he keep coming back to that man?

More puzzling to Heat, why was he lying in this planet-sized bed while that man was out there with a tiny blanket that couldn't do its only job? Why was he warm while that man was cold?

He got out of bed and grabbed his CD player. He suddenly needed to hear Springsteen again. He slid on his headphones as he hurried out the door.

_You can't start a fire,_

_You can't start a fire without a spark,_

_This gun's for hire,_

_Even if we're just dancing in the dark!_

He was in the hallway, then in the elevator, and then in the lobby, approaching the glass doors. The bed already seemed like an eternity ago. He might've teleported down here.

He reached for the door handle...

_You sit around gettin' older,_

_There's a joke here somewhere, and it's on me,_

_I'll shake this world off my shoulders,_

_Come on, baby, the laugh's on me._

What was he doing? Why was he so anxious to help a complete stranger? What if the man didn't want his help? If he wanted help, he'd ask, wouldn't he?

_Stay on the streets of this town,_

_And they'll be carvin' you up alright,_

_They say you've gotta stay hungry..._

He turned around, about to walk back to the elevator, to his room, to his colossal bed.

_Hey, baby, I'm just about starvin' tonight!_

He turned again, went out the door, onto the street, across the street, and finally came face-to-face with the man. Again, it all happened so fast.

The man looked much different up close than he did from the sixth-story window. Heat couldn't tell where his thick, black beard ended and his long, dusty hair began. Under his ragged blanket, he wore a grey coat that seemed about five sizes too big. By his head was a paper cup holding a few dirty coins and crumpled bills, barely a fraction of Plasmoid and Hammerface's earnings from the ferry. He had nothing for a pillow but his arm. He didn't look up at Heat; he only stared straight ahead, waiting for something.

He was shivering.

_I'm dyin' for some action,_

_I'm sick of sittin' 'round here tryin' to write this book!_

"Aloha," Heat finally said. He got no response. "Hello."

The man looked up as if Heat had only just then approached him. "Spare a dollar?" His voice was hoarse, graveled, like a car engine about to break down.

"Uh...Don't have one. Sorry."

"Hrm. Scarce, ain't they?"

Heat cleared his throat. He knew what he wanted to do, but somehow, he couldn't bring himself to ask. But he couldn't leave either.

_I need a love reaction,_

_Come on, now, baby, give me just one look!_

"I, uh..." He began. The man looked up again with that awaiting stare.

"I thought you looked cold..."

"Imagine how cold I _feel." _The words sounded scathing, but the voice made them seem like a mere observation.

"Well...You see, I can, uh...I can generate heat...So I thought...If you wanted, I could..."

"You really wanna spend the night out here?" His question was like a sign warning, _this is the point of no return._

"I want you to be warm." Heat found the words as if he'd rehearsed them for weeks.

The man said nothing for a while. His eyes kept waiting. A few people passed behind Heat, paying him as little mind as they did the man.

"Alright," the man finally said.

Heat curled up beside the man, enveloping them both in the golden glow from the beam embedded in the top of his head.

"Oh," the man said.

"Too hot?" Heat asked.

"No, no, it's good. Thank you...Just forgot what it felt like."

"Oh..."

The sidewalk felt different under his arms and stomach than it had under his feet. It was harder, rougher. Of course it was; it wasn't meant for laying on, let alone sleeping.

"What's your name?" Heat asked.

"...Mike. Yours?"

"Heat."

"Heat?"

"Yeah."

"Wonder where they got that from."

"Heh. Me too."

"Not bad, though. It's like 'Pete.'"

"Thanks."

"Whatcha listenin' to?"

Heat took off one of his headphones and handed it to Mike. He listened for a moment, and then...

_"You can't start a fire," _he sang.

_"Sittin' around, cryin' over a broken heart."_

Despite his rough voice, he wasn't half bad. He wasn't as good as Plasmoid or Angel or Bruce himself, but Heat still thought he was good.

"You know this song?" Heat asked.

"Oh, yeah. Who could ever forget the Boss?"

_This gun's for hire,_

_Even if we're just dancing in the dark!_

Despite the hard sidewalk, Heat found himself drifting off to sleep. He thought of Kixx, but this time, he saw more than just his face. He saw him at the gym, at the movies, at the beach, at the circus. He could reach out and take his hand, but he only ever felt the sidewalk. Still, for now, he could make do with the image of it, and knowing that he was missed.

_You can't start a fire,_

_Worryin' 'bout your little world fallin' apart!_

He never completely fell asleep. Even in the early hours of the morning, he was always half-aware of his dreams of Kixx, and half-aware of the sidewalk beneath him, Mike beside him, and the incessant footsteps of nocturnal New Yorkers.

But Heat knew it wouldn't have been much easier in his Gantu-sized hotel room.

_This gun's for hire,_

_Even if we're just dancing in the dark!_

**THRESHER**

The gym echoed with thuds and clanking chains as Thresher's six spiked fists struck a punching bag as big as him. He tried to focus on the sounds, the coarse feeling of the fabric against his fists, and how many times he'd hit the bag. He tried, but he still kept imagining that the bag was Hammerface.

He let out one last rocketing blow, sending the bag upwards and into a ceiling tile, where it became stuck in the rafters.

"Blitznak," Thresher said.

"Need any help?" Somebody asked.

Thresher looked over his shoulder, finding a man with red hair and sunglasses. The gym was an old, grey place, illuminated mostly from the sunlight outside, so Thresher couldn't imagine why this man would need sunglasses. At least, he couldn't until he noticed the cane the man held close to his chest.

"Um, no, thanks, I've got it," Thresher said, elongating his rubbery arms to retrieve the sleeping bag.

"You were going at that pretty hard," the man said. He didn't face Thresher directly. His head was turned slightly to his left, as though he were looking at Thresher with his ears.

"Yeah. I know."

"Rough day?"

Thresher just sighed.

"I know the feeling."

"Really? I thought this was the City of Dreams."

"Only as much as any other city."

Thresher grunted as he repositioned the punching bag. "Sounds like false advertising to me."

"Can't believe everything you see in the movies. I certainly don't."

Thresher chuckled as he went back to his punching. He tried to go easier on the bag, but it still wobbled even at his softest punches, rattling its chain as if crying out for help.

"Want me to keep that steady for you?" The man asked, making his way around the bag as if Thresher had already accepted his offer. His cane drummed along the tiled floor as he walked, echoing rhythmically with the bag's clanking chain. He reached out with his right arm, searching for the bag. He faced straight ahead all the while.

"Sorry," he said when he accidentally touched Thresher's shoulder.

"No worries."

The man folded his cane into a stick the length of his forearm, tucked it into his pocket, then held the squirming bag still. Thresher's workout resumed with a much more cooperative target.

"So..." He said. "What's it, uh...What's it like being...?"

"It is what it is," the man said. "You learn to live with it."

Thresher found Hammerface slipping into the bag's place again. He tried to envision his target as nothing more or less than a dusty punching bag, but his brain was insistent. He tried imagining Gantu instead. That seemed to work well enough.

"Yeah. I guess you could say that about a lot of things," he said.

"I suppose so. And what about you?"

"Me?"

"What's gotten you so upset with this punching bag?"

Thresher's mind raced. It wasn't small talk; it was temptation. Everything he'd been clenching, imprisoning in his spiked fists, came pouring out his mouth, relishing their freedom.

"My cousins and I fell in with this guy," he said. "A captain. He had us doing some bad stuff for a while. When we finally decided we'd had enough, he had us locked up. Turned out, he'd done the same thing already to a bunch of our other cousins."

"God..." the man whispered.

"It was rough, _real _rough, but we had each other. We knew we'd get out someday. We talked about the things we'd do on the outside, people we'd see, and dreams we'd realize. We even made lists. And finally, we got sprung."

"And did you get to check off everything on your list?"

"Well, that's just it. There were four of us to start out with, and one of us, Hamm, was way older than the rest of us, so we listened to him. We trusted him. Even when things got as bad as they could get, he always knew what to do, how to keep us together..."

The bag shriveled beneath the storm of Thresher's fists. The shrinking image of Gantu flickered back and forth from that of Hammerface.

"But it wasn't enough for him to just get out. We moved into a nearby town, but he couldn't stand being even that close to where we'd been trapped. He said he hated looking at the same trees he'd seen every day from his cell window. He had to get as far away from those memories as possible, and he asked us to come with him. So, of course, we did. He was our friend, and he'd never steered us wrong before."

Thresher's blows were now practically flattening the bag.

_"Except he didn't even know where we were going! _We were just wandering around, trying to find our 'one true place!' All we could do, all we're _still _doing, are shows for any place that'll pay us in room and board! But he keeps moving us when things dry up and just says, 'this wasn't it, guys!' It's never good enough for him! He wants us all to have a steady living, but the only place we ever had it scares him! He's just dragging us around on a wild goose chase, keeping us away from the people who actually care about us!"

He reeled his fist back. Hammerface glared right at him.

_"He's just like the guy who locked us up!"_

His fist impacted the bag like a meteor into a barren planet. Thresher's heart shot into his throat as the bag soared with the man still clinging to it. Just as he imagined how many police cars would come for him, the man kicked his feet off the wall behind him, swinging himself back to the floor, completely unharmed.

Thresher blinked.

"Jeez," he finally said. "Sorry, sorry, I shouldn't-..." He let out a loud grunt, storming off to a bench between two sets of lockers. For a few seconds, he was left with nothing but the silent echo of his rant. He wished he could imprison it again.

And then he heard the man's cane clacking towards him.

"That does sound frustrating," the man said. "I know what it's like to be torn between two different needs."

Thresher looked up at him as he sat beside him, first reaching a hand out to find the bench before carefully setting himself down.

"You don't have to keep talking to me," Thresher said. "Not after that."

"I know," the man said, "but I want to. Seems like you need someone to listen to what you have to say, and you won't find a better listener than me."

Thresher looked at him, about to give a surprised thanks, but then he chuckled. "I saw what you did there."

"I didn't...Okay, last one, I promise."

"You do that a lot?"

"I told you; you learn to live with it...But to get back on track."

"Yeah..."

"Why do you stay with him?"

"What?"

"He's not keeping you locked up, is he?"

"No."

"Then he's not _just _like this captain."

"...No. No, he's not." Thresher shut his eyes, barricading tears. "I shouldn't have said that. I'm just sick of all the moving around, not belonging anywhere."

"Then, why not go back? You're all free now. You don't have to be anywhere you don't want to be."

"I...I don't know...I've thought about going back before, but..." Thresher could find the words, but he couldn't make them come up. They weren't as anxious to be heard as his earlier tirade.

"Maybe," the man said, "Hear me out, maybe you're also scared of going back, of being near those memories of the captain."

Thresher said nothing for a while. He only looked straight ahead at an empty boxing ring at the center of the gym. He was drawn to the ropes. Between them, he envisioned palm trees.

"Yeah," he finally said. "That's, uh...That's why I came with him. It was great to be out, but...It wasn't out _enough, _you know?"

"Yes. I do."

"But it's not just that. As scared as I am, I still miss all our cousins who live there. But if I go back, I know I'm just gonna miss the ones I'm with now instead, even Hamm. And no matter how far we go, I still feel like the captain's place is right next door."

"You can't run from memories like those," the man said. His voice remained soft, but it became stricter, older. It seemed as if how he'd spoken before had been an impression, and he was now speaking as his true self.

"They'll always be a part of you, wherever you go. Maybe one day, they won't scare you as much, but they'll always be there. But that's not a bad thing."

"It's not?"

"Not at all. They can make you stronger, wiser. But you have to let them. If you keep running from them, that's all you'll ever do."

Thresher looked at the man. He wanted to look him in the eyes, but his glasses were opaque.

"You said you've been stuck between two different things before," he said. "How did you figure that out?"

"It was difficult. _Really _difficult. There were...Things I needed to take care of, but I had to leave my friends to do so. It wasn't an easy decision; it seemed like both choices were the right and the wrong one. But in the end, my friends let me know that leaving them didn't mean that we'd stop being friends."

Thresher let the man's words simmer in his mind for a moment. "Right," he said. "Right. Of course, it doesn't...Okay. I think I know what I'm gonna do now."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna talk to my friends about it. I should've spoken to them ages ago, but better late than never, I guess."

"I agree."

Thresher stood up. He was suddenly aware of all the sweat on his face.

"Thank you," he said, extending a spiked fist to the man.

"Glad I could be of help, Mr...?"

"Thresher."

"Matt." The man found Thresher's fist and shook it. "Wow...You were going at that thing pretty hard, huh?"

"You'd know better than me."

"Touche. You goin' back at it?"

"Nah. I'm done for the day. I've...Got something else I have to see to."

"Right. Take care of yourself, Thresher."

"You too, Matt."

As Thresher neared the exit, he heard the bag being struck again. He heard Matt's breathing harmonizing with each thud, quick, sharp, disciplined, perhaps even routine. Thresher wiped sweat from his forehead as he considered looking back at the bag one last time.

But he decided he'd seen enough of it for one day.

**HAMMERFACE**

From Hammerface's room's window, he could see windows upon windows stacked towards the sky. Through them, he could see people packing, unpacking, watching TV, reading books, playing with their kids. It was always the same, even when he looked again seconds, hours, days later.

Then why did he always expect to see his cousins, pressed against the glass, wondering how much longer they'd have to wait?

_"Hamster?"_

"Yeah?"

_"You still there?"_

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm here."

Hammerface thought he'd have more to say to Clip today than yesterday. He silently scorned himself; he had thought the same thing when he called her yesterday.

And the day before that.

And the day before that.

_"Feelin' a bit antsy about your show tonight?" _Clip asked.

"Yeah." Hammerface clenched a bunch of his duvet in his fist. He wished he hadn't lied, or at least hadn't sounded so repetitive.

_"You'll do great. I know you will."_

"Y-...Thanks. I'll do my best."

They were silent for a while. Hammerface glanced out the window again. He blinked at a man doing push-ups remarkably similar to the way Thresher used to.

"Sorry I'm not so talkative lately," he finally said.

_"It's okay...It's hard to find things to talk about when we can't do the same things together."_

Hammerface bit his lip before he could say 'yeah' again. "I know."

_"Do you think you'll be able to come back and visit soon?"_

"...I don't know."

Silence again. Hammerface spotted a girl listening to her headphones, jumping on a bed like Plasmoid did back then.

_"Do you want to?"_

He squeezed the duvet tighter. The question was like a ferocious hand strangling him.

"Yeah," he said.

More silence. Hammerface wondered why he even bothered getting a burner phone. He may as well pay for every minute he wasn't talking to Clip at all.

Although he felt like he already was.

_"Okay...Well...I'll let you go. Big night for you tonight."_

Hammerface searched for something to say. He was disappointed that he couldn't find anything more clever, but he supposed this would do.

"I love you."

More silence.

_"I love you, too."_

And then a beep.

Hammerface took the phone away from his ear, staring at it as if expecting some additional input from it. Then, he placed it in the bedside drawer, had a sip from his bottled water, looked out the window again, screamed into a pillow, had another sip of water, and then headed downstairs.

The venue was a dimly-lit dining room with crimson carpets and a circular stage in the center. The performers would be seen from all angles. The piano was one of the sleekest, most beautiful instruments Hammerface had ever seen. He thought he must be diminishing its value by the thousands just by touching it.

Following an introduction by Fanning promising 'rising stars' and 'nothing like you've ever seen before,' Hammerface and Plasmoid were allowed to begin their set. They went through all the hits they knew, mostly Sinatra, which the tuxedoed crowd ate up as much as their appetizers.

Hammerface gazed around the room throughout the set. He was met with smiles from all around. Plentiful applause followed each song, as well as every improvisation from Hammerface and swaying Sinatra-ism from Plasmoid. It was every bit as spectacular as Hammerface had pictured it, and a tremendous improvement from all the places they'd played before.

The only thing missing was that feeling he thought would come with it. Lilo had talked about everyone having 'one place where they truly belonged.' He had thought something inside him would ignite like a firework once he found it. And yet here he was, seeing the smiles and hearing the applause he had been dreaming of. And there was nothing.

"Up for one more, Hamm?" Plasmoid asked over the next wave of applause.

Hammerface beckoned him over and whispered into his ear.

"Oh...You sure?"

"It's just the one I'm feeling right now...Up to you."

Plasmoid was pensive as the applause died down. "You know what? Sure. When you're ready."

Hammerface's claws returned to the keys as Plasmoid's deep voice entranced the room one last time.

_"And now I know,_

_"Spanish Harlem are not just pretty words to say,_

_"I thought I knew,_

_"But now I know that rose trees never grow,_

_"In New York City."_

Hammerface replayed his phone call with Clip in his mind. He tried to think of something else he could've said to her, but nothing came to mind.

_"Subway's no way for a good man to go down,_

_"Rich man can ride, and the hobo, he can drown,_

_"And I thank the Lord for the people I have found,_

_"I thank the Lord for the people I have found."_

He thought about visiting like she'd suggested. Forget visiting; why not move back?

_"While Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters,_

_"Sons of bankers, sons of lawyers,_

_"Turn around and say 'good morning' to the night."_

He knew why. As much as he wanted to see her, he didn't know if he'd see the same things in the windows in Hawaii as he did here.

_"For unless they see the sky,_

_"But they can't, and that is why,_

_"They know not if it's dark outside or light."_

He glanced around at the audience one last time. They were still attentive, even between mouthfuls of steak and wine, but Hammerface couldn't feel their gaze anymore.

_"They know not if it's dark outside or light."_

He stood up and took a bow with Plasmoid. He left as soon as he could, passing Thresher and Heat in the foyer without a word. He went to the elevator and waited two minutes and forty-seven seconds before giving up and taking the stairs instead. When he got to his room, he stubbed his toe on one of the bed's legs. He sat on the bed, looked out the window, and cried, even though his toe didn't hurt that much.

He wondered if anybody could see him through his window. Would he even notice if they did?

The room's chorded phone rang. Hammerface answered it with a coarse _"What?!" _He hoped he hadn't sounded tearful, but somehow, he knew he'd failed.

_"Great show tonight," _Thresher said. His tone came like a smack in the face.

Hammerface sniffed. "Thanks."

_"Don't mention it."_

"I'm sorry. I'm just..." The right word eluded him. He wasn't sure there even was a word for it.

_"I know, man." _Now his tone was like a warm hand on Hammerface's shoulder. His words lingered for a while as Hammerface's eyes gave their last tears.

_"Hey, come back down here. There's something you'll wanna see."_

"What is it?"

_"I can't tell you. It's a surprise. Just come down, quick."_

Thresher hung up. Hammerface grabbed a towel, drying his eyes before heading out the door. He was thrilled when the elevator arrived instantly, but less so when he saw his red-eyed reflection in the mirror inside.

Just as he thought that it wouldn't be so bad as long as nobody else got on the elevator with him, somebody else got on the elevator with him. It was a kid in a baseball cap who got dropped off one floor up before Hammerface's journey down resumed.

"You here for the convention?" The kid asked.

"No," Hammerface answered. The kid then hurried out of the elevator.

Finally, he went back through the foyer and returned to an almost-empty dining room. Thresher, Heat, and Plasmoid beckoned him to a table near the stage. As he approached them, he watched the stage as the next act began.

He couldn't believe his eyes. He waited for the moment when he would snap awake in bed, most likely falling out of it. He kept waiting as Kixx began plucking at his guitar, and Clip's long claws dropped to the piano keys.

_"There are places I remember,_

_"All my life, though some have changed,_

_"Some forever, not for better,_

_"Some have gone, and some remain."_

Hammerface found his seat without even looking for it. It suddenly seemed like drying his eyes had been a waste of time.

_"All these places had their moments,_

_"With lovers and friends, I still can recall,_

_"Some are dead, and some are living,_

_"In my life, I've loved them all."_

Clip and Kixx alternated between smiling at Hammerface and the others and sending a shy, hopeful look to another table. Hammerface looked over his shoulder. He found Lilo, Stitch, Angel, Flute, Chopsuey, Daniel, Nani, David, and a David lookalike in a brown suit a few tables away. They gave thumbs-up to the performers as they enjoyed slices of cake. They waved at Hammerface when they caught his eye. He waved back.

_"But of all these friends and lovers,_

_"There is no one compares with you,_

_"And these memories lose their meaning,_

_"When I think of love as something new."_

Hammerface wondered how long Clip had been learning piano. She was quite good, aside from a drop in temp here and there, but he didn't care. He just felt light and warm, as if he were meeting her for the first time all over again.

_"Though I know I'll never lose affection,_

_"For people and things that went before,_

_"I know I'll often stop and think about them,_

_"In my life, I love you more."_

Clip smiled at Hammerface again. He blew her a kiss, and she went pink.

_"In my life, I love you more."_

There was soft applause from the few audience members who had stayed for dessert. Hammerface and Heat didn't applaud; they rushed onstage to hug the performers. Thresher and Plasmoid received hugs of their own from Lilo and the others.

"How did we do?" Clip asked.

"Perfectly," Hammerface said.

"Really?"

"Couldn't have played it better myself." For this, he was rewarded with a lick of his flat nose.

"Thanks. Been getting lessons from Angie."

"How did you guys get here? When did you arrive?"

"Bonnie and Clyde lent us an old ship they're 'renting.' We just got here today. We've been planning it for weeks."

"So all that talk about visiting...?"

"Aw, I'm sorry, Hamster. I was _dying _to tell you. I just didn't want to spoil the surprise."

"It's okay. Better than okay...I really needed this."

Clip exhaled. "There's just one more thing. This isn't just a visit."

"I figured as much."

"So...?"

She didn't need to ask, and he didn't need to answer.

Hammerface looked into her eyes. He'd always remembered what they looked like, but he'd nearly forgotten what they felt like. He remembered again what Lilo had said about finding a place to belong. He scorned himself for ever thinking he had never felt it before.

"What do you think, guys?" He turned to his cousins. "Time to head home?"

"You don't need to ask me," Heat said, already curled up on Kixx's shoulder.

"Ditto," Thresher said.

"Yeah, I think I've taken enough bites out of the Big Apple," Plasmoid said, "but what about those contracts we signed with that Fanning guy?"

"I think I can help with that," the David lookalike stepped forward, offering Hammerface a handshake. "Jason Kawena. If you like, I can see about buying your contracts from Fanning."

"Nothing for it like nepotism, I guess," Hammerface said, accepting the handshake. Jason had a firm grip for a human.

"Well, everybody knows a guy who knows a guy."

Hammerface turned back to Clip. He felt like he was in zero gravity.

"I'm so sorry I left," he said. "But more than that...I'm sorry I let my fear make me forget how much I love you."

Clip's long claws glided through the fur on his cheek. "I'm sorry I didn't come with you."

They hugged again. Hammerface couldn't believe it; she had somehow gotten fluffier.

"So..." he said. "That's it?"

"Yeah," Clip said with a smile. "That's it...Unless there's anything else you guys wanted to do while we were here?"

"Actually," Heat piped up with a snap of his fingers, "there is _one _thing."

**MIKE**

It was a warm night. Mike couldn't remember the last time he was outside at night and felt warm. He couldn't remember the last time he'd worn shorts and a t-shirt, either. He'd always thought about visiting Hawaii, but he never imagined that anywhere could be so warm.

With one hand, he switched on the spotlight. With the other, he felt his face. It had been ages since his last shave. He didn't think his cheeks would feel so smooth after so long. He spotted his reflection in the steel shell of the spotlight. His heart skipped a beat; he still couldn't believe that was what he looked like now. It felt like meeting a childhood friend decades later as an adult.

He waved the spotlight around the stadium a few times as the piano started up. It was another full house tonight. Finally, he dropped the light on Plasmoid, following him as he swayed to the stadium's center in his black fedora and bowtie. His voice rang out over the crowd's cheers, even reaching Mike all the way at the stadium's edge as if he were aiming for him.

_"Some folks like to get away,_

_"Take a holiday from the neighborhood,_

_"Hop a flight to Miami Beach or to Hollywood,_

_"But I'm takin' a Greyhound on the Hudson River line..."_

Mike pulled up a folding chair. All he had to do now was keep the light on the singers and enjoy the show.

There were fifty thousand seats in the whole place, but he knew he had the best one.

_"I'm in a New York state of mind!"_


	17. Episode 16: Born to Run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yin and Yang embark on a seafaring adventure, but are threatened by a mysterious stowaway.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Born to Run" by Bruce Springsteen  
*"Save Me" by Queen

**Episode 16: ** _ **Born to Run** _

**I**

Yang had been waiting for seventeen minutes and twenty-eight seconds. He knew because the Beethoven tape he was listening to was twenty-two minutes and thirty seconds long. The final track, which was about to begin, was five minutes and two seconds long. At the very least, he had a little more time to enjoy his music.

He sat curled up on the sand, taking in the palm trees and the view of Kokaua Town in the distance one last time.

He turned to the boat, still idling by the island, secured by the perfect knot he had made around a tree. He scanned the vessel, ensuring he had remembered everything.

Barbeque? Check. Cooler? Check. Fishing rods, tackle box, spare wire, and his favorite fishing hat? Check. And, of course, Yin's CDs and portable stereo. She'd go crazy if they forgot it, and Yang was eager to avoid repeating their last vacation.

The ship itself was a glistening white speedboat, complete with a retractable roof and sleeping quarters underneath. Yang still couldn't believe the price he managed to rent it for. He was tempted to take it out straight away and just let Yin catch up.

No, he couldn't.

Could he?

Before he could decide, a flurry of thin blue tentacles splashed out of the ocean. Yang hugged his tape player to shield it from the falling water. He hated wet fur and wet tape players, but the former was much more easily fixed than the latter.

"Sorry I'm late," Yin said as she began loading plastic-wrapped bags into the boat. "Was just getting a few extra nibblies."

"I know," Yang said, shaking himself dry. "I'm just wondering why you took so long."

Yin turned red as her tentacles curled around one another. "I, uh...Might've stopped to chat with Heat and Kixx for a bit."

"Might've?"

"Well, definitely."

"Sure it was a chat and not a philosophical debate?"

"A double-feature chat, then. I haven't seen Heat in ages. I wanted to catch up."

"I'd argue triple-feature."

"Look, does it matter?" Yin crawled into the boat, already ripping open the bags she'd brought. "We're just going boating. It's not like we have a deadline on our own vacation."

"It's not about deadlines." Yang climbed in after her. "It's about me waiting here for you, wasting time that could be spent on the trip we're actually supposed to be going on."

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" Yin said through a mouthful of chips. "I'm here now, so why don't we get started?"

Yang sighed. "Yes. Let's." He went to start the engine, but first, he turned up the volume on his tape player, allowing Beethoven's perfect notes to calm him down.

**II**

Yin leaned backward as her tentacles clung to the top of the mast. The speeding sea breeze balanced perfectly with the warm sun, creating the perfect temperature. She yelled, _"woo-hoo," _over the motor's roar and the crashing waves, but not quite loud enough to drown out Bruce. She wouldn't dare.

_"In the day we sweat it out on the streets of a runaway American dream,_

_"At night, we ride through mansions of glory in suicide machines!"_

She adored music as much as her cousins. They all had their favorites; their Kings, their Princes, their Sweet Lords. But she had always felt a connection to the Boss.

The island where she and Yang made their home was nice, but she always wanted to be elsewhere. She wanted to explore the town, see her friends, see what was beyond it, how far she could go. And the Boss put that unrelenting curiosity into words better than Yin ever could. Hearing songs like _Thunder Road, No Surrender, _and _Rosalita (Come Out Tonight) _made her imagination race and her heart sprint to keep up with it.

And, without a doubt, his masterpiece was _Born to Run._

_"Sprung from cages out on Highway 9,_

_"Chrome-wheeled, fuel-injected, and steppin' out over the line,_

_"Oh, baby, this town rips the bones from your back,_

_"It's a death trap, it's a suicide rap!"_

The E Street Band didn't play any instruments on this one. They played Yin's heart.

She looked down at the driver's cabin. Through the window, she could see Yang, his claws tight around the wheel, and his black eyes fixed straight ahead. He looked tense as if he were driving through a crevice barely wider than the boat instead of a wide-open sea. She wondered why he couldn't sit back, take a hand off the wheel, and just enjoy the wind and the music.

She wondered a lot of things about him.

But she wouldn't let them spoil her vacation. So, as the chorus approached, she leaped into the water, her elongated tentacles still clinging to the mast. She skied along the bubbling white ripples beside the boat, felt the wind and the water in her face, and sang along.

It was perfect.

_"We gotta get out while we're young,_

_"'Cause tramps like us, baby, we were born to run!"_

**III**

Yang took in a long breath of fresh sea air. He savored the sound of the waves, rolling through his ears like a loving caress. He loved admiring it from a distance, although he still couldn't understand why looking at it felt so different from being in it.

He didn't take too long; he had to make the most of his along time before Yin returned from her swim. Somehow, she had a knack for showing up early when he wanted her to be late and vice versa. Yang thought that Jumba must've given her a sixth sense for knowing when he didn't want her to show up.

Donning his fishing hat and putting Beethoven's Fifth on the CD player, Yang pulled up a recliner and cast a fishing line into the sea. He leaned back, his claws firm around the fishing rod as the rest of him relaxed. The brilliant thing about fishing, in his humble opinion, was that he could spend a whole day out on the water, come back with nothing, and still feel fulfilled. It forced him to loosen up and just enjoy the water and the air and Beethoven's glorious symphonies. For a while, he would have nothing better to do, which was more than alright with him.

Then, just as he was about to lose himself in that temporary eternity, he heard a splash and a loud inhale.

"Done already?" He said, darting up to face Yin as she slithered back on deck.

"Wanted some more nibbles," she said.

Yang folded his arms, pouting as the crunching noise of Yin chewing chips polluted Beethoven's masterpiece. It was all the evidence he needed for his theory of Yin's sixth sense.

"Hey," she said through a mouthful, "can you teach me how to do that?"

Yang turned back to her, blinking. He swore that he had misheard her. "You want to learn how to fish?"

"Yeah. What, you too busy?"

Yang blinked again, too surprised to whip up one of his usual retorts. "Uh, no. Here, pull up a chair and a line and I'll show you."

Yin did as he asked straight away. She didn't even stop to change the music. However, once she was sat down beside Yang, her tentacles couldn't seem to find where to put themselves on the fishing rod. She ended up holding it as if she were aiming for fish on the floor right beside her.

"Hold on..." She said. "That's wrong, isn't it?"

"Here, let me help you with that." Yang reached over and unraveled her tentacles, guiding them into the proper fishing pose.

"Oh, yeah, that makes more sense," Yin said. "So, what's next, boss?"

"Next, you'll need some bait." Yang reached down into the tackle box. As he instructed Yin, he felt a welcoming mixture of relaxation and surprise. Somehow, he was slipping back into that temporary eternity.

**IV**

Yin blew bubbles into the sea as she completed her seventh loop-de-loop in a row. She still couldn't believe how blue it all was. It was the perfect shade, like the best parts of every other shade of blue had come together in one infinite masterpiece. It was amazing to look at, but it was beyond extraordinary to be in. Looking down at her tentacles, Yin looked and felt cooler, clearer, bluer than she ever could on land. She was convinced that being underwater, exploring its vast, rocky, glimmering landscapes, purified her.

She felt sorry for Yang. She truly believed he would love it as much as she did, were he not so afraid of it.

Just as she was thinking of him, she glanced up and found a pair of orange legs kicking. She shot up to the surface, needing to see it to believe it.

"What are you doing out here?" Yin asked over her resurfacing splash.

"What does it look like?" Yang said, clinging to the red-striped donut-shaped floatie around his stomach. "I wanted to try swimming."

Yin looked past Yang; the boat was a good ways away, much further than she thought she'd swam, let alone how far she imagined Yang could swim, even with a floatation device.

"I thought you were scared," she said. "You told me you thought the ocean was a never-ending chasm of nightmares, and the boat was your safe haven from which you could appreciate its aesthetic beauty, or something along those lines."

"Yes," Yang said. "Yes, I did. But I thought, if it was fine for you to go in, then I should be alright, too."

"Hm," Yin said. "Not bad for a first-timer, but the _best _part is going underwater."

"I can't do that. I'll sink, remember?"

"I can carry you," Yin held her tentacles out to a paling Yang. "Come on, cuz. You trust me, right?"

That was enough to lift Yang out of his floatie. Yin kept him snug in her tentacles as she sank back into the water. She was careful to move as slowly as possible, giving him plenty of time to adjust to each new depth.

His orange fur brightened in the undersea glow, even more so than whenever he channeled his fire powers. He shimmered like an aquatic sun.

Yin watched his face, waiting for the moment when he would fall in love with it just as she had.

He smiled, blowing bubbles into the sea.

**V**

Sometimes, when Yang was determined to relax, his brain conspired against him. It would dream up the perfect thought to keep him on his toes while spoiling whatever he was or wasn't doing. This time, as he and Yin were lost amid Beethoven's symphony and the fish they weren't catching, his brain presented its magnum opus.

What if it wasn't Yin sitting beside him, but 628?

The thought escalated in Yang's mind alongside the tempo of Beethoven's orchestra. First, he wondered why 628 would single him and Yin out of all Experiments. And they were so far out from the island that they'd surely be out of 628's reach. Unless he'd somehow heard about their trip. Perhaps when Yin had stopped to chat with Heat and Kixx, they were actually 628 and one of his clones in disguise...

Then he realized that he was overthinking about why it might not be 628, and not enough about why he thought it might be him in the first place. It was because she wasn't being Yin. She wasn't gobbling down chips or blasting rock music or swimming for hours on end. She was sitting down to fish with him. He didn't even think she'd like fishing, and yet here she was. Or was she?

And then he felt sick. If it weren't for 628, then he would've accepted this instantly as just a relaxing time with his friend. But now, Yin couldn't surprise him like this without being accused, even silently, of being an imposter. He hated his brain for even considering the idea.

"I think I've got one!" Yin said. "Oh, wait...False alarm. Guess that one just wanted to nibble and run."

"Don't pull too quickly," Yang said, "give them a moment to get a good hold."

Yang racked his brain for something more useful. He needed something that he knew Yin would never budge on, but that 628 might not know. Something small yet undeniably Yin.

He was on the fence about her hatred of pineapples when he thought of something better, something which always mystified Yang. Queen's song, _Save Me. _He remembered hearing it for the first time and thinking it might be something he and Yin could actually agree on. It was somber, yet uplifting, just like his favorite classical compositions. But Yin always skipped it if she was ever listening to the album. It had everything Yang knew she liked; drums, bass, electric guitar, powerful vocals, yet it was always skipped, and Yang couldn't fathom why.

With any luck, 628 wouldn't, either.

"Gonna put another CD in," Yang said.

"Cool," 'Yin' said.

Yang went to Yin's case of CDs, walking his claws over them until he found Queen's _The Game. _He popped it in the player, carefully putting away Beethoven's glorious fifth as he did, skipped to the final track, and then observed Yin.

_"It started off so well,_

_"They said we made a perfect pair,_

_"I clothed myself in your glory and your love,_

_"How I loved you, how I cried..."_

Her head bobbed with the sad, soothing lull of Brian May's piano and Freddie Mercury's voice. Any tentacles not holding her fishing rod waved as if conducting an invisible orchestra. Yang conceded that 628 at least had good musical taste.

"You know..." He said, "Yin isn't a fan of this song."

Yin froze. Yang took a few steps towards her, but when she still hadn't moved, he froze too.

_"The years of care and loyalty,_

_"Were nothing but a sham, it seems,_

_"The years belie we lived a lie,_

_"I'll love you 'til I die..."_

Something tugged on Yin's line.

_"BLITZNAK!"_

She hurled the line over her shoulder, moving like an enraged woodcutter towards an unfortunate log. An unsuspecting flagtail was promptly flung over the boat and into the water several yards away.

She had roared with a voice that sounded nothing like Yin's. It nearly made Yang cough up his heart. Once the fish had hit the water, he looked back to Yin. In her place stood a mass of some sickly green gelatinous substance, staring back at him with coal-like eyes.

Yang dropped to all fours, heating up the craters along his back, ready to counterattack the instant 628 lunged at him.

But the gelatinous substance kept staring.

_"Save me! Save me! Save me!_

_"I can't face this life alone..."_

"What gave me away?" 628 asked.

Yang tilted his head but didn't drop his guard. "What?"

"You all keep giving me these strange tests, but only when you're already suspicious of me. I want to understand what I'm getting wrong."

"You think I'll give you constructive criticism on your sting operation against my cousins?" Yang growled, flaring up his craters. He expected some kind of retort but didn't get so much as a blink.

_"Save me! Save me! Save me!_

_"I'm naked, and I'm far from home."_

"I didn't say I wanted you to help me with my operation," 628 said. "I said I want to understand what I'm getting wrong."

Yang let his craters cool down, but only a little. "Well...It was all of it. Yin wanting to fish. I wanted to believe it, but...I couldn't."

628's black eyes narrowed. "Are you sure?"

Yang couldn't answer.

628 slithered to the stern of the boat, gazing at the midday sun. "You see, I thought I had it wrong before. I studied everything that allures each of you to this planet—the routines, the activities, the music, and all the little details that come with them. I can memorize those easily, but it isn't as simple as that. You're all so...Inconsistent. So many of you do things that the others don't like, or can't even _stand. _That was where I was failing; I was assuming that, if you didn't like these things, then you also wouldn't like it when your so-called cousins liked them. Silly little things like what songs can or can't be played in a shop...But they're not silly little things to you. This time, I thought I would get better results if I ignored that assumption."

"What do you mean?" Yang asked.

"You say you couldn't believe that 501 would want to fish. That's just it. I couldn't believe it either, but I _could _believe that she would want to fish with _you."_

Yang's craters went out completely. He kept blinking as his eyes heated up with the threat of tears.

"But I guess I was wrong," 628 said, "again."

Yang kept blinking. He already couldn't believe that he was having a conversation with 628 of all people. He was, at least, determined not to cry in front of him.

"Thanks for teaching me about fishing," 628 said.

Yang swore that he misheard. He would've asked 628 to repeat himself were there not a much more urgent question at hand.

"You weren't wrong..." he said. "Now, where's the real Yin?"

628 turned back to him. He was blinking, too. "Where she said she'd be...If everything went according to plan, my clones should be bringing her along now."

No sooner did he answer did Yang hear another splash.

"Yang," Yin gasped, crawling onto the boat. "It's 628! He's found us! He nearly got me, but I managed to slip away...Oh. Looks like you already figured that out."

"Yeah," Yang said, approaching her to help her up. "But it's okay. I don't think he's a threat anymore. Listen, Yin, I-"

Another splash sounded from the other side of the boat. Yang darted around to find another set of tentacles crawling on board.

"Don't listen to her, Yang," the second Yin said. "She's 628 in disguise!"

A third slash and a third set of tentacles.

"Nice try," Yin number three said to her doppelgangers. "You can't even get _one _fake me right!"

More and more tentacles and accusing words made their way onto the boat, which swayed as Yin after Yin closed in on Yang.

"Woah, woah," Yang yelled. "First of all, I'm almost positive we're over capacity right now! Secondly, you can yell at each other all you want, but obviously, there can be only _one _real Yin, and _I'll _be the judge of that. So you can all be quiet; I don't want to hear it unless it's something that only the real Yin would know!"

He regretted those words the moment they leaped off his tongue.

**VI**

"You're really ticklish under your left armpit!"

"I write tons of letters to the Boss, but I'm too shy to mail them!"

"You're stupidly good at poker! Seriously, it actually makes me mad!"

"Pleakley wouldn't less us come to sleepovers at Lilo's house because he was afraid I'd start another pillow fight. Then Lilo invited us to one the day after he went into space. And I started another pillow fight."

"The only thing stopping you from asking Skip to take you back in time to see Beethoven live is that you already know it'll be sold out! And you're too nice to sneak in!"

Yin would've torn her own hair out if she had any. She felt like her own thought process was being screamed back at her. It was impossible to think of anything before one of her imposters thought of it first.

Her next thought was lashing out, smacking as many fake Yins off the boat as she could, grabbing Yang, and getting out of there. No, that wouldn't work. She was stuck all the way the back of the gaggle of Yins; even if she got a few, there was no way she could get to Yang before they turned into Kixxes or Clydes or Flutes and overwhelmed her. That wouldn't help her or Yang.

The crowd was closing in, counting down precious seconds with each bit of random Yin-Yang trivia. Yin racked her brain for something, anything that would translate to Yang as, _it's me, your real best friend!_

He was going pale, curling up as he was smothered by the closeness of the Yin clones. His craters smoked, but never completely ignited.

Yin thought he must be scared of hitting the real one.

Then she remembered the last time he had looked like that. The thought lit up her brain in an explosion of realization. She threw her tentacles into the air, yelling out what she had said to him that had made him so scared long ago.

_"Yang! Come swim with me!"_

Color rushed back to Yang's face. He dove under the sea of imposters, sliding between them along the deck and reaching out towards Yin. She fell backward off the boat, catching Yang's arms while her doppelgangers snared his legs.

"Oh, come on," Yin yelled as she felt both of them being dragged back onto the boat.

"Don't worry, cuz," Yang said, his craters glowing with orange smoke. "I got it."

Three jets of sizzling lava erupted from his back, striking the Yin duplicates and breaking their grips, allowing Yin and Yang to tumble into the water.

The instant they were under, Yin clung to the boat's hull. Step 1 had been getting Yang, but she hadn't thought at all about step 2. She was crossing her tentacles that, when the company of 628s inevitably jumped in after them, they would simply swim deeper into the sea, assuming they'd already swam off. But there were at least a dozen of them; that meant decent odds that one would look under the hull.

Yin looked at Yang. She could feel his claws clinging to her. He looked calm, even though she could feel his heart pounding away.

But that may have been her own heart.

A series of muffled splashes came like warning shots as the Yin duplicates arrived in a cloud of white bubbles. Only about half of them came down, hungrily scanning the surrounding sea.

"Alright," one of them said, their voice muffled as bubbles poured from their mouth. "Fan out. 501 is a fast swimmer; she'll likely be heading back to their island. It's a long way, but it's our best bet."

"You sure?" One of the other Yins said.

They both spoke with a gruff, demanding voice that Yin didn't think suited her at all. Watching them felt surreal, like watching high-quality puppets being controlled by a second-rate ventriloquist.

_"We're _sure," the first Yin duplicate said. As he did, his black eyes wavered in the real Yin's direction.

He'd seen her. He must have. Yin's whole body went cold.

"Come on. We're losing them."

And then they swam off. Yin watched as they shrank into the blue while heat rushed back through her body.

She didn't waste any more time. First, she swam to the other side of the boat and resurfaced so Yang could take in some air. They were both careful to breathe as quietly as possible.

"Everyone keep a lookout," they heard one of the 628s order. "They might come back and try to reclaim the ship."

"Can we turn that music off?" One of them asked.

Seconds later, another asked, "do we have to?"

Even more seconds passed before another said, "Well...I guess not. It's only music, isn't it?"

**VII**

It was smaller than the island they called home, but it would do. At the very least, the palm trees gave them enough wood to start a fire.

"How long do you think it will take to swim back to Kokaua tomorrow?" Yang asked as he carefully positioned the firewood into a pyramid shape.

"Most of the day, probably," Yin said, making firey shapes in the air with a burning twig like a pyrokinetic conductor. "You think we should check the boat again on the way?"

"I guarantee 628 will be expecting us. Our best bet is to get straight back home. We can ask our cousins about helping us get the boat back. I bet Chopsuey will have a plan...Man, I hope they don't damage it."

"I hope my Bruce CDs will be okay."

"Yeah..."

They curled up on the sand, drying off in the orange and purple glow of the crackling campfire and the darkening dusk sky. Eventually, Yang couldn't take the silence anymore.

"What was 628 like for you?" He asked.

"He looked like you," she said, "and said he wanted to try swimming again."

"And you believed him?"

"Yeah."

"Even though I said I was scared?"

Yin blew out her twig. "I always thought you could do it if you really wanted to. And, to be fair, you did."

Yang looked out at the ocean. It looked like ink under the evening sky.

"Fair enough," he said.

"Then he started fighting me. I tried to get back to you, but he was faster."

"That's funny. While he was pretending to be you, he had me teach him to fish, but he never attacked me."

"Huh...Wonder why. They both should've done the same, right?"

Yang looked into the fire. "Maybe. Maybe not."

Again there was silence, and again Yang couldn't take it.

"Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Yin said with a grin.

"What's your problem with _Save Me?"_

Yin's grin vanished. "It's stupid," she said as she began drawing in the sand with her twig.

"It's not."

"How do you know? I haven't told you."

"Jumba gave me mind-reading powers."

"No, he didn't."

"I knew you were going to say that."

"Shut up."

They both laughed. It felt good, especially after the strain of their journey, but it soon faded, leaving only the crackling of the fire and the rolling of the sea.

"It just..." Yin said. "The lyrics. _Said we made a perfect pair...Nothing but a sham..._They just...make me think that maybe...That you don't really like me."

Yang felt as though he'd been punched in the chest. "Why would you think that?"

"I told you it was stupid."

"And I told you it wasn't. Yin..." He reached around the fire, resting his claws on one of her tentacles. "I _do _like you. And...I'm sorry if I forget that sometimes."

Yin's tentacle coiled around Yang's arm. She was blinking. "I like you, too...I'm sorry if I also forget."

The silence was more bearable this time. They both stopped blinking, letting the fire dry their tears instead.

"Hey," Yin said, picking up another twig. "We might not have our CDs, or our fishing lines, or our nibbles, or even our boat, but we're _still _on vacation." With that, she cast her tentacle out into the water, where it landed with a soft yet satisfying _plip._

"I don't think the fish will take to wood," Yang said.

"Well," Yin said, "you said that the allure of fishing comes less from the prospect of catching fish and more from the opportunities it presents for meditation and relaxation."

"I said that?"

"You said that exactly. So, am I doing it right?"

"Almost. Just relax your tentacle. Don't wanna pull a muscle if you get a bite."

Yang couldn't believe that Yin had memorized what he'd said about fishing. He wasn't even sure she'd heard him when he said it. He thought the least he could do was remember something that Yin had said.

"The highway..." was all he could manage at first.

"The highway?" Yin said. "What about it?"

"The highway's jammed..."

Something lit up in Yin's eyes. She guided his voice as he guided her line. Soon, they were a near-perfect duet.

_"The highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last-chance power drive,_

_"Everybody's out on the run tonight, but there's no place left to hide,_

_"Together, Wendy, we can live with the sadness,_

_"I'll love you with all the madness in my soul!"_

As they sang, as they waited for the fish that weren't coming, as the sun left them alone with the fire, they slipped together into that temporary eternity.

_"Oh, someday, girl, I don't know when,_

_"We're gonna get to that place where we really wanna go,_

_"And we'll walk in the sun,_

_"But 'til then, tramps like us,_

_"Baby, we were born to run!"_


	18. Episode 17: The Long and Winding Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Jumba and Pleakley close in on Hamsterviel's lab, Jumba ponders his success as an evil genius.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"All My Tomorrows" by Frank Sinatra  
*"All For Leyna" by Billy Joel  
*"The Long and Winding Road" by the Beatles

**Episode 17: ** _ **The Long and Winding Road** _

**I**

"Don't worry about me, Jumba," Pleakley screamed into the communicator on his spacesuit's collar. "I'm nearly done dangling into the cold, empty void of space while mending the giant hole in _your _ship!"

He got no response, so he returned to welding the last replacement panel onto the ship's starboard side. Minutes later, just before he was done, Jumba answered.

_"Were you saying something, Pleakley?"_

Pleakley sighed. "No, Jumba. I didn't say anything."

_"It was sounding like you were saying something."_

"Well, if you were listening, you'd know, wouldn't you?"

_"I am conducting important decoding of tracer signal. I am not having time to be listening to every little thing coming out of your two-tongued mouth."_

"Well, I'm all finished, so will you 'be having time' to open the hatch and let me back in?"

_"Yes, despite hurtful sarcasm. You know English is not being my first language."_

"You don't actually care."

_"Not really. Was cheeky attempt at making you feel bad."_

Pleakley climbed around the ship's hull, shielding his eyes from the light of a shooting star in the distance. He slid into the open airlock, shutting one door behind him and opening another in front. He was ecstatic to return to the safe, oxygen-filled warmth of the ship, no longer chilled by a Gantu-sized hole into space. He was less enthused at the sight of Jumba still at his computer, his meaty fingers still clacking away at the keyboard. Worst of all, the dirty dishes from his brunch hadn't budged.

"I thought you said you were going to do your own dishes this time," Pleakley said.

"I did," Jumba said. "I said, 'I will.' This is still being true. Is still in future."

"Right. So even if you don't do your dishes until a hundred years from now-"

"Is still being true. Exactly. You are smarter than you look, Pleakley."

"I'll take that as a compliment." Pleakley reached past Jumba to retrieve his plate. As he did, he glanced across the lab to a wall-mounted storage pod. It had been left open since the break-in. An empty gumball-sized pedestal stared back at Pleakley.

"So," he said, "seeing as I've been doing all the clean-up from the mess Gantu left, you must've made some good progress."

"Patience, Pleakley," Jumba said. "Is nearly finished. Tracking device I slipped on giant shark-man's back is being scrambled. Dr. Hamsterviel is careful despite insanity and extensive criminal record. But descrambling process is nearly complete. All that is left now is the waiting."

"How long will it take?" Pleakley asked.

"Not much longer." Jumba pressed a button on his keyboard, bringing up bright blue text.

_2 Transmissions Received:_

_-The Grand Councilwoman of the Galactic Federation: Concerning the Investigation into the Whereabouts of Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel by Agent Wendy Pleakley and Dr. Jumba Jookiba._

_-Lilo Pelekai: Aloha!_

"There's a message from the Grand Councilwoman," Pleakley said. "It could be important."

"Almost certainly," Jumba said as he opened the message from Lilo.

_Aloha, Jumba and Pleakley. Hope you guys are staying safe up in space._

_We're still looking for that new Experiment. Finder, Bonnie, and Clyde have been working non-stop, but it's tricky since 628 can change what he smells like. Yin and Yang had a run-in with him yesterday, but they're okay, and they think they know how we can find him. If they do, then Chopsuey says he has a plan to stop him. I hope he'll let us teach him to be good. I always feel bad for a cousin when they're still doing bad things. They seem really sad, and they don't have anyone to help them feel better. It reminds me of how Nani and I used to feel before we found Stitch. I think Stitch used to feel that way, too._

_But there's been good stuff, too. We've been seeing a lot more of David's brother, Jason. We usually see him at Spooky's game nights. He loves playing cards. He's really nice, but he always wears a tie, even just for hanging out. But I guess it's not much different from Houdini always wearing her top hat. Also, Hammerface, Heat, Thresher, and Plasmoid came back to Hawaii to stay, and now they do shows with Stitch and Angel and the others. There's a video of their last concert in here. Plasmoid makes an awesome Frank Sinatra._

_Do you guys think you'll be back to visit soon? Maybe for Christmas? The house feels really different without you. I know the Federation wants you guys to find Hamsterviel, and we hope you find him, too, but we still really miss you._

_Anyway, take care. Say aloha to the Grand Councilwoman. And 625 if you see him._

_Love, Lilo._

"Well," Jumba said with an unusual softness. "Isn't that being nice of her?" He opened the attached video file and was greeted with a view of Plasmoid, donning a black bow tie and trilby, pouring his heart out to an ecstatic crowd. Behind him, a beaming Hammerface accompanied him on piano.

"I didn't know Hammerface could play piano," Pleakley said.

"Nor I," Jumba said.

"He's _really _good."

"Yes..."

Plasmoid spun around, then started up again.

_"Right now it may not seem like spring at all,_

_"We're drifting, and the laughs are few,_

_"But I've got rainbows planned for tomorrow,_

_"And all my tomorrows belong to you!"_

Pleakley wiped his one giant eye. "And I didn't know Plasmoid could...Do that to my heartstrings."

"Again, nor I," Jumba said.

"Didn't you make those little monsters? How can there be anything you don't know about them?"

Jumba didn't answer. At first, it seemed like he was staring into space, but then Pleakley followed his gaze to the empty storage pod.

"What did you design 628 for, again?" He asked.

"Everything," Jumba said, suddenly perking back up to his usual excitable disposition. Pleakley always thought he seemed thrilled just to have someone listen to all his evil genius jargon. Sometimes he wondered if Jumba would go insane without someone to hear him. Other times, he wondered if he already had.

"If 627 is being Jumba's greatest hits, then 628 is being Jumba's _Sergeant Pepper! _He has powers of nearly every previous Experiment, from 300's shape-changing to 344's cloning to 601's incredible strength, but having none of weaknesses whatsoever! Is Jumba's finest work!"

"Right," Pleakley said. "But I more meant, what did you make him _for?"_

Jumba raised two of his four eyebrows. "I am not following meaning."

"Well, you made all the little monsters up until Stitch for Hamsterviel. Then you made Daniel to teach Stitch a lesson. So why did you make 628?"

Jumba leaned back in his rotating chair, his four eyes swaying between the video of Plasmoid and the empty storage pod like one of those strange metal ball things Earthlings put on their desks. He thought for a while before he answered.

"In case 627 was not being enough to smarten up 626."

"Right," Pleakley said. "You know they have real names now, right?"

Jumba's four eyes blinked one-after-another. "627 is Daniel and 626 is Stitch. I am sometimes forgetting that your tiny head is not having the same memory capacity as my much larger evil genius head."

"It's not that...I mean, I did almost flunk math in high school...My point is that they'd probably want you to use their new names instead."

Jumba looked as if he were about to say something, but he only turned back to the video of Plasmoid's performance.

"Anyway," Pleakley said. "You're gonna have to talk to 628 once Lilo and the others get a hold of him. He's gonna have a lot of questions for you."

"I am knowing."

"And you're gonna have to tell our ohana back home that you made 628 in the first place."

"I am knowing."

"And the Grand Councilwoman will want all this on record-"

_"I am knowing, Pleakley!"_

A suffocating silence followed. All five eyes in the room were wide and unblinking. Then, as if growing restless of the tension, the computer gave a mechanical chirp.

"There," Jumba said. "Signal is clear. Come now, into pod! Hamsterviel will not just sit and twiddle thumbs until we are finding him!"

The portly scientist darted about the room, retrieving any stray tool strewn about that he may or may not need. As he did, Pleakley raised a long finger. He hated whenever Jumba did this when he was trying to have a serious conversation with him, but he was always scared to put his foot down. He never knew what exactly scared him.

He opened his mouth, his eye narrowed in its most defiant glare.

"Alright. I'll drive."

He still didn't know what scared him.

**II**

Jumba's four eyes were locked on his laptop screen for the whole journey, but he barely took in the data it showed him. He only became aware of it again whenever Pleakley asked if he should keep going straight. He would check, answer with a curt 'yes,' and then return to untangling the knots of his mind.

It had recently occurred to Jumba that he was not a very good evil genius. In fact, he thought he may have only gotten increasingly worse at being an evil genius since his university days. He considered it statistically. He had made 628 Experiments who were supposed to be pure evil. Conquering planets, toppling governments, ruining lives, leaving CDs out of their cases, and any other delightfully malicious things of the sort. The last time he checked, more than two-thirds of them had been turned good. He remembered that, in university, anything below fifty percent was considered a failure. The math said it all.

He thought about each of his evil creations individually. The ones who were supposed to steal property were returning it. The one who was meant to spread disease was curing it. Even the one who Jumba had explicitly built to never, ever be good in a trillion years had done precisely that. A proper evil genius wouldn't make these kinds of amateurish mistakes. Yet, here Jumba was, reflecting on the 628 times and counting he had tried his absolute best to be an evil genius and failed miserably.

The only explanation was that he had kept getting something wrong. But what? It was the one knot he just couldn't get undone.

The laptop beeped.

_"Wait!" _Jumba exclaimed.

Pleakley slammed on the brakes. Their pod had stopped outside an asteroid hosting a long and rusty-looking building. Its roof bore a blindingly-lit sign reading, in colorful Uranian text; _K'Z'R'T'X's Public 'Stroid. Tonite: Open Mic Karaoke._

"Gantu's here?" Pleakley asked as he slid into a parking space beside the building between two other ships, one shaped like a blue box and the other like a massive green insect.

"According to tracker, yes," Jumba said. "Perhaps Hamsterviel has sent him for take-out. Evil geniusing is being hungry work." He hopped out of the pod, making it shake.

"Come. With any luck, Gantu is being held up by lunch rush."

"You want me to go in there like this?" Pleakley gestured down to his navy blue Federation uniform as if it were some repulsive creature clinging to his torso.

"What is being problem?"

"I'll look so tacky."

"You are looking fine."

"I have a perfect top for a place like this back on the ship, but instead, I'm gonna look like a total bore going out in his work clothes-"

_"Pleakley," _Jumba snapped. "You are looking fine." His voice came out much softer than he thought it would.

Pleakley blinked as his cheeks turned the faintest shade of pink. "Well, if you say so."

The inside was the same combination of color and rust as the exterior. All manner of alien creatures chatted around tables surrounding a circular stage, where someone resembling a purple penguin was butchering the melody to an old Arrakian ballad. There were enough colors for it to qualify as a rainbow, albeit a dingy and pale one. Some people towered above Jumba and Pleakley, and others they had to avoid stepping on. Some had more eyes than Jumba or fewer eyes than Pleakley.

Even amid such a diverse clientele, Jumba thought Gantu would be easy to spot, yet the giant shark was nowhere in sight.

"Hm," Jumba pondered as he and Pleakley slid into an empty table.

"What's wrong?" Pleakley asked, leaning back in his seat and crossing two of his three legs, trying his hardest to look like he wasn't on the clock.

"I am beginning to think Gantu may have found tracker," Jumba said, "and placed it on unsuspecting diner."

"Ah...You sure? Maybe he's hiding upstairs or downstairs."

"Is very possible. Only question is getting there without nosy staff noticing."

"Well, you're the 'evil genius.' How do we do that?"

Jumba's four eyes scrutinized the boisterous, bustling place, but his brain barely absorbed the data they collected.

_You're the evil genius. _Jumba wasn't sure about the evil part. And, as smart as he felt, he was even less sure about the genius part. Even the way Pleakley had said it had been doubtful, like he was begrudgingly playing along with some childish roleplay of Jumba's. And it may as well have been. A proper evil genius would have something better to do than figuring out how to sneak into the _Employees Only _areas of a second-rate pub.

A new karaoke singer had replaced the purple penguin on the stage.

_"She stood on the tracks, waving her arms,"_

_"Leading me to that third-rail shock,_

_"Quick as a wink, she changed her mind!"_

Now Hamsterviel, _there _was a proper evil genius. He didn't waste time in dingy old pubs, or descrambling tracking device, or repairing space station hulls, or watching videos of his cousins singing Frank Sinatra. He never did, even back in school. He was completely and utterly dedicated to the meticulous craft of evil geniusing. When he set out to do something evil, he never let it accidentally become something good. It didn't always succeed, but that wasn't the point. After all, nobody with true passion ever followed it because it made them successful. They did it because there was some irresistible allure about it. And there was something definitely evil and undeniably alluring about Hamsterviel.

_"She gave me a night, that's all it was,_

_"What will it take until I stop,_

_"Kidding myself, wasting my time?!"_

And people made fun of Hamsterviel. Any good evil genius _had _to be made fun of. Jumba had received his fair share of playful insults. But they were always obscured by Stitch and Angel's hugs, Nani's thanks whenever he did the dishes, and the heartfelt letters Lilo sent him every other day.

Hamsterviel, on the other hand, had been getting all the _Hamsterwheels _and _Gerbil-Boys _and _Overbites _since university. They were practically his pseudonyms. Even Jumba had joined in with them. People had their laughs, but Jumba always saw through them. They had to make themselves laugh so they would forget how terrified they were. It wasn't the kind of fear brought on by a giant monster or a furious ex-wife armed with a rolling pin. It was a fear like when you're walking home at night and think you see a pair of eyes somewhere in the trees near your house. You keep telling yourself it's nothing, yet your mind can't help but torment you with all the nightmarish things that might be hiding there in the darkness.

Jumba knew all too well. He had felt it, even dreamed about it.

_"There's nothing else I can do,_

_"'Cause I'm doing it all for Leyna!"_

Jumba suddenly realized that he had heard that song before. He looked back at the stage and found that he recognized the singer as well.

_"Don't want anyone new,_

_"'Cause I'm living it all for Leyna!"_

And he should recognize him. He'd spent a good three weeks perfecting his super-strength and designing every inch of his portly, honey-mustard-colored body.

Actually, he seemed to have lost weight since Jumba last saw him.

_"There's nothing in it for you,_

_"'Cause I'm giving it all to Leyna!"_

"625!" Jumba called out.

625's black eyes swerved for a second in Jumba's direction. He then turned and began playing to the other side of the room. He held the microphone up high, singing into it as if he were taking a long swig from it.

_"I'm failing at school, losing my friends,_

_"Making my family lose their minds!"_

"Funny seeing him h-_Woah!" _Pleakley suddenly found himself being pulled by the arm across the room.

"Hey, what about your plan?"

"It can wait," Jumba said. "We will be knowing if Gantu moves. But 625..."

_"I don't wanna eat, I don't wanna sleep,_

_"I only want Leyna one more time!"_

The instant Jumba and Pleakley got a front-row view of 625, he spun around to slide to another end of the stage. Jumba raced to meet him there.

This time, 625 locked eyes with Jumba. His cadence went from bouncy and casual to something much more accusatory, as if he were a musical prosecutor.

_"Now, I'm in my room, watching the tube,_

_"Tellin' myself she still may drop,_

_"Over to say she's changed her mind!"_

Jumba blinked, and the pub changed. He imagined a whole troupe joining 625 on the stage; Angel on guitar, Hammerface on piano, a dance routine choreographed by Elastico. They all appeared crystal clear to Jumba, and 625 melted right in with them.

_"So, I wait in the dark, listening for her,_

_"Instead of my old man saying stop,_

_"Kidding myself, wasting my time!"_

The original blueprint for 625 hovered over Jumba's mind. Every blueprint he had ever designed was tattooed onto his brain. 625's had been one for a creature of immense strength driven by pure destructive rage. The singer in front of him was so far off that the blueprint might've served better as a napkin. He was, by every academic and scientific definition, a failure.

Jumba felt something like pride welling up in his gut, but something dragged it back down.

_"There's nothing else I can do,_

_"'Cause I'm doing it all for Leyna,_

_"Don't want anyone new,_

_"'Cause I'm living it all for Leyna,_

_"There's nothing in it for you,_

_"'Cause I'm giving it all to Leyna!"_

The music faded out, and what few patrons were paying attention offered their applause. 625 took a quick bow, passed the mic to the next singer, an android made entirely of cubes, then hopped down beside Jumba.

"Sheesh," he said, "could ya give me any _less _space?"

"Aloha, 625," Jumba said with a grin, hoping it would be returned. It wasn't.

"How'd ya guys even find me?"

"Actually," Pleakley said, jabbing his elbow into Jumba's arm. Jumba barely felt it.

"We're _supposed _to be here looking for Gantu."

At the mention of the name, 625 spun around, frantically scanning in every direction.

Jumba took out his laptop again. A red dot blinked further and further into the corner of the screen.

"Seems we have just missed him," he said.

Pleakley let out a sigh like an earthquake. 625 wiped his brow.

"Hey, be having chins up," Jumba said. "We still have tracker."

"Yes," Pleakley said, "but we didn't figure out for sure if Gantu put it on some poor innocent bystander or not!"

"I wouldn't count on that," 625 said. "Ol' fishface was a lotta things, but he wasn't the ripest banana in the bunch. You're probably still fine."

"See, Pleakley?" Jumba said. "We must be remaining optimistic."

"There ya go. And when ya find him, tell him I said 'good riddance.'" With that, 625 turned to leave, but Jumba was quick to block his path.

"Why don't you be joining us, 625? We can be, how they say, catching up. And then we can be taking you back to Hawaii."

"I was going there anyway," 625 said, "just the long way 'round."

"Long way 'round?"

"Yeah. Earth ain't goin' anywhere, right? So what's the rush? I just ain't ready for the whole 'one true place' bit yet. I wanna ride out the transitional period a little while longer."

"Then you may be riding it with your ohana," Jumba said.

At that, 625's face darkened in a way that seemed ill-suited to his face. Jumba found it strange because it would've been perfect for the face of his original blueprint.

The Experiment darted around Jumba, storming out of the exit.

"Odd," Jumba said. "Is usually working when Lilo does it."

"Well," Pleakley said, "you're not Lilo."

Jumba shrugged, then bolted after 625. He managed to catch up to him in the middle of the parking lot, nearly losing his breath for it.

"Please, 625, listen-"

"Actually," 625 spun around. His glare was both piercing and familiar to Jumba. Hamsterviel used to look at him just like that.

"Why don't _you _listen for a change? I never _asked _you to make me, and I never asked to be part of your family! My whole life has been nothin' but keepin' my head down, just so the people on _your _back, and your _family's _back, would stay off 'a _mine! _And I don't know if you've noticed, but a whoppin' _zero _'a us have bought into the whole 'wanton destruction' plan ya shoved down our throats since _before we were even born! _We're all just tryin' to live the lives we wanna live, but we gotta keep puttin' up with _you _and _everythin' you've saddled us with by association! _You're the galaxy's worst inheritance! The gift that keeps on taking!"

625 stopped, now looking even more out of breath than Jumba, whose four eyes were watering.

Jumba could sense Pleakley standing behind him. He could sense his hesitance to intervene. He was remaining neutral. Jumba was fine with that; it was a stance he wished he had taken ages ago.

"I'm usually a pretty laid back guy, ya know," 625 said, running his palms along his scalp. "This is what ya do to your 'Experiments,' doc," he said the word as if it made him sick. "Ya make 'em into the worst things they can possibly be!"

Jumba felt something like a kettle screeching in his head. He tried to stop it, but it had already gotten control of his mouth. "And you have never done anything to hurt your cousins?"

625 folded his arms. "I didn't say that, man. I know what I've done. I just..." He ran an arm over his eyes. "I wasn't thinkin'...But I ain't talkin' about me! I'm talkin' about you!"

"Of course," Jumba said. "And I am trying to make things right for my ohana. That is including you. If I can find Hamsterviel, then all this pain we are feeling can stop."

"...Ya really think it's that easy?"

"No. Not _that _easy. But it is start, is it not? We can both put right what he have gotten wrong. Together." Jumba offered his hand. 625 regarded the gesture with a skeptical look. It was the kind of face one made when a rabid manglyoid had chased them to the edge of a cliff overlooking a stormy sea.

"Fine," 625 said. "But I'm doin' it for the others, not for you."

"Of course. I am doing it for others, too."

Jumba felt a breeze as if the air around them was sighing with relief.

"So," Pleakley said with a clap of his hands, "shall we go now, or should I grab some take-out first?"

**III**

Jumba's eyes bounced between the sea of stars in front of him and the blinking red light on the map screen. Behind him, Pleakley and 625's conversation about sandwich recipes was as lively as it had been an hour ago. Jumba couldn't believe it, but in all that time, he hadn't said a word. He couldn't remember the last time he'd gone so long without jabbing at Pleakley, monologuing to himself, or practicing his rendition of _Heartbreak Hotel._

What he did remember was night after night lying awake in the dormitory as Hamsterviel mumbled his way through another all-nighter. Sometimes, a bright light would flash from his desk across the room, and he would let out a hypnotic, malevolent cackle. Jumba must have missed dozens of classes catching up on the sleep he missed while listening to Hamsterviel's every word. Today, he found it ironic that he couldn't remember what he had been going on about. He only remembered that the allure of his sinister voice. It was enough that, after a few weeks of it, Jumba began working at his own desk late at night, practicing mumbling and cackling and creating things that made blasts of light. But it was never enough to make Hamsterviel get up from his work and see what he was working on. He would have to actually create something, or at least begin to. He would have to do more research, even if it meant taking extra classes and losing more sleep. Bio-engineering seemed like the way to go. Fascinating, practical, and filled with possibilities for an aspiring evil genius.

"Wait," 625 said, "you mean that's a thing people do?"

"Of course," Pleakley said. "That's my favorite part of that weird week between Christmas and New Year's; the leftover sandwiches."

"And all this time I thought that was just a guilty pleasure of mine. Guess I've gotta find another one."

Perhaps Jumba should've done more research.

But would it have really made a difference? He could create Experiments, yes, but they were supposed to be _evil _Experiments. What was the missing ingredient? Or was that just it? Was it simply not possible to create something evil? Or was it that Jumba himself, despite his efforts, wasn't evil enough to create something evil? Had all his Experiments been pretending for him as much as he had pretended for Hamsterviel? All this time, he thought Lilo had been giving his Experiments something, something which convinced them to change. Had she actually been taking away the lie that Jumba had told them, leaving only what was left when Jumba was gone?

_Ya make 'em into the worst things they can possibly be!_

Jumba suddenly remembered the song that Daniel had played for him during one of their video calls.

_Wonder if he'll ever know,_

_He's in the best-selling show._

He chuckled.

"Jumba...?"

He got it now.

"Jumba?!"

It was about him and-

_"Wakey-wakey, doc! Ya might find this at least slightly interesting!"_

Pleakley and 625's desperate cries shattered Jumba's thought process like a priceless porcelain vase. He jerked his head to the right and found a grey eye the size of a tank staring back at him. Jumba could see his reflection in the massive black pupil. He looked pale.

"Holy bologna," 625 said as he and Pleakley clung to one another.

"What is-" Pleakley began before Jumba shushed him.

A low, groaning noise, like a quaking yawn, shook the pod.

The eye blinked. As Jumba drew carefully closer to the window to study the eye, he felt as though he was being studied right back. It was a tingling sensation, like entering a sauna after a long walk in the snow.

Jumba reached for the dashboard, pressing a button beside the radio. He hoped he could still remember a few phrases.

He made a series of droning, bellowing noises with his mouth, aware of 625 and Pleakley now looking more terrified of him than the creature outside, but not particularly caring. He had meant to say, _please don't eat us, we don't want to hurt you, _but was worried he may have accidentally asked for directions to Saturn.

The pod shook again with another groaning noise. Jumba was almost positive that it meant, _sorry, have a nice day, _but was about fourteen percent sure that it could also have been, _time for dessert._

Jumba clenched the wheel, ready to drive if he had to.

The eye vanished. Among the distant stars, Jumba saw a colossal whale-like creature swim to join a group of several others, each as large as several ocean liners.

He exhaled for what felt like the first time in months. He turned around to find 625 and Pleakley still frozen in each other's arms.

"What is being matter?" He asked. "Surely, you must have been seeing orcus galacticus before."

His companions separated as color returned to their faces.

"I didn't know you could do that," Pleakley said.

"I can be doing many things," Jumba said, "as I keep reminding you."

He had meant it as a lie. If he'd learned anything during his time working for the Galactic Federation, it was that there were a great many things he couldn't do. But when he'd said it, it hadn't felt like a lie.

The computer let out an affirmative buzz. Jumba looked at it to find their destination in sight; Gantu had led them to a planet.

"Oh no," he said.

"What?" Pleakley and 625 asked in unison.

"Jinx," 625 said.

"Drat."

Jumba looked through the windshield. He didn't need to look at the screen to find out what this dark, foggy, sea blue planet was called. He had memorized the sight of it from every astronomy book he had read from childhood to his university career.

"Seriously, though," 625 said, "where's ol' fishface led us?"

"This is Quelte Quan," Jumba said. "This is my home."

"What's the matter?" 625 asked. "Ya think Hamsterviel's got your folks?"

"No. Not being his style."

"Are you worried we're going to bump into your ex-wife?" Pleakley asked. "Because I think that's unlikely."

"No."

"Then what is it?"

"I am hoping I am wrong..."

Jumba hoped with every cell in his failed-evil-genius brain as he entered Quelte Quan's atmosphere. He hoped more and more as he passed the planet's teal falcons and soared over its rapier-like skyscrapers. But as he hoped, the ghostly image of Hamsterviel hovered in his mind's eye. He was grinning the same grin he'd grinned the night he finally looked over Jumba's shoulder to see what evil invention he'd been cooking up.

They finally arrived, and Jumba's hopeful efforts had been in vain. He could see Hamsterviel bursting into laughter, his cruel joke finally realized.

Jacques never could contain his laughter.

Jumba, Pleakley, and 625 stepped out of the pod and observed the building in front of them. It was tall, dark, and decrepit, untouched perhaps for years. Jumba and Pleakley were reminded of movie nights back in Hawaii and all the monsters who lived in dark castles on the edges of cliffs.

The place was decorated with tattered banners, shattered windows, cobwebs, and paint. It bore such messages as, _NOT FOR MY KIDS, LUNACY 101: ENROLL NOW, _and _THANKS FOR THE MANIACS._

Jumba looked above the front doors, one of which dangled from its hinges. In his mind, he could see the banner reading, _Quelte Quan Institute of Science and Technology. _It was now covered in scorching red paint.

_Evil Genius University._

**IV**

Back in Hawaii, Jumba would sometimes sneak downstairs in the dead of night for a snack. It was always a risky operation, as he knew being spotted would mean incurring Nani's wrath. He had to navigate the house with deathly silence and in total darkness. Familiar rooms were distorted into haunted chambers, masking their dark forms with the ghosts of Pleakley dusting, Lilo drawing, and Stitch practicing ukulele.

Navigating his abandoned alma mater invoked a superpowered version of that sensation. Jumba instinctively tilted his body to move between passing students that weren't there. He could hear the debate team down the hall, discussing the pros and cons of Quelte Quan splitting from the Federation. But there were only his group's footsteps on the cracked marble floor. The only light was that creeping in through the windows, but Jumba could move about the place as briskly as if he were running to his next class.

But there was more at stake now than whether Nani would deprive him of a bag of popcorn.

He hoped that Hamsterviel wouldn't find him.

But he was desperate to find Hamsterviel.

Desperate.

"You never told me much about your days at uni," Pleakley whispered, his eye transfixed by each ajar door they passed. Gazing into each shadowy classroom was like staring down the throat of some gigantic predator.

"I tell you some," Jumba said.

"Seems like you and Hamsterviel left quite an impression."

"Yes. Two students enter seemingly normal, law-abiding citizens, leave as evil geniuses causing destruction throughout galaxy. Not exactly inspiring trivia for new applicants."

"Did you know this had happened?"

"Yes. Remember hearing news while making 021...Or 120..."

"And you didn't tell us?"

"Look at this." Jumba gestured to the next hallway as they turned a corner. Up ahead, the ground was littered with trophies near a shattered case.

"I was not even trying to destroy this place, and yet I have done best possible job. I may not truly be evil genius, but I can destroy, even when I am not trying to...Think of what our ohana has been doing without me. Think of things they have fixed, lives they have saved, with me as far away as possible. Do you think this is coincidence?"

"Yes," Pleakley said. "I do."

Jumba blinked. He was certain Pleakley would hesitate, but his answer had been instant and firm.

"Not discussion for right now," Jumba said, carrying on down the hall. "Mission first."

He heard Pleakley mumble something behind him. It sounded like, _you always do this. _Jumba wanted to respond. He didn't.

"So," 625 whispered, "what happens once we find the guy?"

"I will try talking to him," Jumba said.

"That's it?"

"And while I am doing this, you two will go snooping, find what he is planning."

"Somethin' to do with roundin' me and my cousins up, for sure."

"Yes, but we must be knowing specifics."

A clicking noise sounded from a room beside them, giving them all a taste of a heart attack. The darkness therein was illuminated by a white light coating the furthest wall.

"What is it they are saying," Jumba said as he led the way inside. "Be asking, and you shall be receiving?"

It was a lecture hall. Empty seats stretched from the bottom up to where Jumba and his companions entered. He was reminded of the waves on the Hawaiian sea and what it was like to finally surf along the very top of one.

The white screen flickered into the image of a tall, thin blue creature with three piercing red eyes. He wore a crimson suit with coattails that nearly touched the floor, and even though he seemed to be looking straight at Jumba, he still felt like he was being looked down upon.

But the old dean simply had that effect on students.

_"In this program," _his voice boomed over the crackling speakers, putting the growls of the orcus galacticus to shame.

_"You shall become imbued with the traits necessary to change the galaxy as we know it. For change is more than chemicals or even evolution. Change is what happens when you find what is hiding in plain sight and drag it kicking and screaming into the light."_

And then, while the dean's mouth kept moving, another voice crept over his dialogue like a viper.

_"I am saying that you must have vision! But what I _actually _mean is that you must share _my _vision! Any of you who possess the _obedience _and the _cowardice _to revolutionize within the boundaries I have set for you shall be grotesquely rewarded! I may even have the decency to offer you a job, so I may pay you to do what you have already been paying me to let you do! But for those of you seeking to create actual change, to you, I say, you are _nothing!"

The screen rolled into the sight of a desk against a curtained window. A plaque on it read, _Dean Gunther Freem. _Behind it was the back of a revolving chair. Two long, silhouetted ears towered above it.

_"He said that to me, you know. Not _all _of it...But I know he was thinking it! He _did _say the part about me being nothing. I had to work to get into this stupid place. I saved for years, working between space station construction and Moon Burger drive-thru, to have enough for tuition. Then, I finally get to propose my ideas. Entire mechanized, non-autonomous workforces and armies, leaving the galaxy's living beings to focus on the areas they neglect amid all the so very stupid parts of society! And I am called a lunatic for it! But we realized the truth, didn't we, Jumba? We had to pay them to study here, but..."_

The screen became clouded with static.

_"We never needed their permission!"_

When it cleared, it showed a room filled with metal tanks, each fitted with a glass window, revealing their inhabitants.

"No," Jumba whispered. "My little ones..."

He could see their black eyes, staring as if they could see him through the screen. They seemed to either be saying, _please, _or asking, _why? _Most likely, it was both. Jumba felt sick looking at them, but he didn't dare look away.

It was the least he could do.

_"All this time," _the voice carried on, _"I have been told that I am wrong, that I am insane, that I am nothing! Our very stupid dean told me that, the annoying Earth girl told me that, and even you, my old friend, have told me. Have I been wrong before? Of course. I did not see the error we made that allowed our Experiments to ignore their true purpose. I did not expect you to notice it, but I should have. Now I will correct this error, and my vision, the vision that has terrified everyone, the vision that I _know _is right, will finally come to fruition!"_

The screen went black. Footsteps thundered from outside.

"Pleakley," Jumba said, "go contact Councilwoman. 625, go to Earth, find your cousins."

"Woah, woah, woah," 625 said.

"What about your plan?" Pleakley said.

"No need for snooping," Jumba said. "Too dangerous now. You must be going before Gantu and Hamsterviel arrive."

"I can't just leave you alone," Pleakley said.

"And I cannot be leaving my little ones. Not again."

"You don't know what he'll do-"

Jumba wanted to yell at him to shut up and do as he was told for once in his life. At the last minute, he changed his mind.

"Wendy," he said in his softest voice.

Pleakley's eye widened. He let out a sigh. "Okay."

"And 625?"

"I-I-I dunno, man," 625 said, clutching tufts of fur on his head. "I-I don't-"

"Go home, 625," Jumba said. "That is all I am asking."

625 looked up at him. His eyes were struggling to keep their tears captive.

"Okay," he said. "Anything's better than seein' fishface again."

They sprinted out of the lecture hall. Pleakley turned for a moment as if he wanted to say something, but then he kept running.

Jumba felt like a meteor had landed in his stomach. He wondered what Pleakley would've said. He hoped he would find out.

But look where hoping had gotten him.

He could feel the footsteps coming ever closer. They approached from behind the screen.

Jumba remembered how Lilo and Stitch would sing to keep themselves calm. He thought he would give it a try. He sang the first song that leaped into his mind.

_"The long and winding road,_

_"That leads to your door,_

_"Will never disappear,_

_"I've seen that road before,_

_"It always leads me here,_

_"Lead me to your door..."_

He could still feel the sting of his little ones' eyes. He wondered if 628's eyes felt the same way.

_"Many times I've been alone,_

_"And many times I've cried,_

_"Anyway, you'll never know,_

_"The many ways I've tried..."_

The daylight blinded him as the room was lifted like a lid. Squinting, he spotted a regrettably familiar shark-like face glaring down at him, accompanied by a hovering metal platform.

No half-decent evil genius walked when they could use a hovering platform. That was another problem; Jumba enjoyed walking.

_"But still they lead me back,_

_"To the long winding road,_

_"You left me standing here,_

_"A long, long time ago..."_

The platform descended until it was behind a desk at the base of the lecture hall. Its pilot stepped off; he was wearing a red, long-tailed suit. He looked up at Jumba in a way that seemed like he was looking down at him, and grinned.

Jumba could remember countless nights dreaming about this. He couldn't remember why.

_"Don't keep me waiting here..."_

That was a lie. He could remember why.

He was just ashamed of it.

_"Lead me to your door..."_


	19. Episode 18: Hotel California

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please check out by noon.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Hotel California" by the Eagles

**Episode 18: ** _ **Hotel California** _

_ **On a dark desert highway,** _

_ **Cool wind in my hair,** _

_ **The warm smell of colitas,** _

_ **Rising up through the air,** _

_ **Up ahead in the distance,** _

_ **I saw a shimmering light,** _

_ **My head grew heavy, and my sight grew dim,** _

_ **I had to stop for the night...** _

Drowsy stretched an arm out from under his duvet to shut off his alarm. He sat up, yawned, and tried to remember setting an alarm to begin with. He also noticed his bedding; it felt tighter than it had when he went to sleep.

After lumbering out of bed, he went to the window and watched the rain for a while. He didn't see rain often, but he loved the sound it made as it came down; that pattering noise that was somehow both delightful and miserable. It was hypnotic.

There was a knock at the door. "Your breakfast, sir."

Drowsy crossed the room, passing the miniature fridge, the closet with the built-in safe, and the desk that was barely bigger than him, and opened the door.

"Thanks," he said. "Just put it on the desk."

"The scrambled eggs are lightly seasoned with paprika," Remmy said. He floated in with a tray of golden eggs, glistening sausages, generously-jammed toast, and a tall pitcher of orange juice.

"As per your request." He set the tray down where he'd been told, then straightened his black vest and tie.

"Looks delicious," Drowsy said.

"How does it smell?"

Drowsy sniffed the air. "I, uh...I don't smell anything."

"Right. I better get to work on that."

Remmy floated in place for a moment, his head down at the breakfast, although his black eyes didn't seem to be looking at it.

"You okay, Rem?" Drowsy asked.

"I'm fine," Remmy said. "...Just wish I'd thought of it sooner."

"It's fine, really. I have almost no sense of smell, anyway. It's probably just me."

"Not the food," Remmy said with surprising firmness. Drowsy took a step back.

"I mean Drowsy. He's never come down to meet me after work. He's always busy baking or working on his sleep-aid tapes...Or sleeping...If I wasn't in such a good mood that day, I wouldn't have bought it for a second. But you probably planned it that way, didn't you?"

Drowsy looked past Remmy at the rain tapping on the window.

"Actually, I didn't. He _was _coming to see you. I caught him in the elevator of your apartment building."

Remmy looked up. "But why?"

Drowsy shrugged. "Because he wanted to. Because he likes spending time with you, even though you keep waking him up in the middle of the night."

Remmy looked back down, then at the window. The rain got heavier.

"I think that's why I've been even a little successful," Drowsy said. "As close as you all are, there are still a few things you don't know about each other."

Remmy looked back in his direction with a glare that blended anger and sorrow.

"It's not that we don't know," he said. "We just forget sometimes." He floated back to the door, turned around, and shut it slowly.

"Enjoy your stay, sir."

Drowsy kept his gaze on the door as he sat down. For some reason, he thought Remmy would return. When he realized he wouldn't, he turned back to the rain.

Suddenly, he could smell the paprika.

_ **There she stood in the doorway,** _

_ **I heard the mission bell,** _

_ **And I was thinkin' to myself,** _

_ **'This could be heaven, or this could be hell,'** _

_ **Then she lit up a candle,** _

_ **And she showed me the way,** _

_ **There were voices down the corridor,** _

_ **I thought I heard them say...** _

Sparky gobbled up another AA battery, washing it down with a sip from his watermelon smoothie. He reclined in his chair, looking up to see the rain hitting the glass ceiling. Looking at it felt surreal, like waking up after a long sleep with fuzzy vision and waiting for the world to get itself together.

Being inside on a rainy day made Sparky feel warm. Even if the temperature indoors wasn't any higher than usual, merely being in from the cold filled him with a cozy, tingling feeling.

That was why he found it strange to look ahead and see so many guests in the lazy river. Weren't they staying inside so they wouldn't have to get wet?

The lazy river was gigantic. From his lonely seat at the poolside, Sparky couldn't even see most of it; the rest was hidden through a tunnel in the marble wall. What he could see was a snaking path of crystal clear water interrupting the tiled floor. The other guests were doing exactly what he was doing, nothing. But they did it on inflatable donuts that carried them in endless laps. To them, the allure of doing nothing wasn't enough; they had to do nothing in a way that made it seem as though they were doing something.

"Hey, Sparky!"

Angel and Flute floated by. They weren't doing nothing disguised as something; they were actually doing something. They'd brought their beloved guitar and flute in with them, stopping their recital to get Sparky's attention.

"Come on in," Angel said, waving her arms and antennae. "Water isa great!"

"Naga taka," Sparky said. "Naga like water, remember?"

Their eyes darkened at his words.

"We know Sparky can't touch water," Flute said, "but you're not Sparky, so it shouldn't be a problem for you."

Sparky blinked. He felt like he'd been smacked in the face. "Fair enough," he said, dropping his fake voice in favor of his natural one. At the very least, he felt relieved to stop making his voice sound higher-pitched; it did a number on his throat.

He got up and hopped into an empty donut near Angel and Flute, laying with his front over one end and his legs beneath the water. He anticipated a splash but heard nothing. He'd stayed dry as well. He looked to find that the river was empty, and yet its passengers still floated, and his feet still treaded against some kind of pressurized force. He kicked and kicked, but he would not move. Angel and Flute slowly passed by him.

"Um," Sparky said, "I think I'm stuck...Could I...I don't know, hold onto someone's donut or something?"

Flute and Angel exchanged looks, then rested their instruments carefully in their laps, and played a round of rock-paper-scissors. Flute's paper covered Angel's rock. Angel rolled her eyes as Flute snickered. She then started playing her guitar again.

"Here," she reached towards Sparky with her foot.

"Huh?"

"Hold on. Take youga for ride."

"I can't hold your hand or something?"

"Naga. Need hands for guitar."

"You can't put it down?"

"Naga."

"Really?"

"Really-really."

"Fine," Sparky grunted as he took hold of Angel's ankle. Suddenly, he was moving with her and Flute.

"So," he said, "where does this lead?"

"Why?" Flute said. "You in a rush?"

"I, uh...I guess not. I just want to know."

"Well, we don't know."

"You don't? Haven't you been around once already?"

"Naga," Angel said, happily strumming away. "Jumped in only little while back."

"Huh," Sparky said. "I thought you'd been in longer."

He looked ahead; the tunnel was coming up. He squinted, trying to make out something, anything, but there was nothing but total darkness.

"What do you think is in there?" He asked.

Angel shrugged. "Hope there isa smoothie stand. Meega thirsty. What youga think, Flutey?"

"What do I think's in there?" Flute said. "Us, soon." She looked at Sparky. "Don't ask any more questions. I can't answer you and play at the same time."

"What should I do, then?" Sparky asked.

"Just listen."

They started up again, this time with Angel singing. Sparky took Flute's advice.

The tunnel was almost upon them.

_"Welcome to the Hotel California,_

_"Such a lovely place,_

_"Such a lovely face,_

_"Plenty of room at the Hotel California,_

_"Any time of year,_

_"You can find it here..."_

He gave them all his attention. All other sounds around him were silenced as they played.

He liked it. He didn't quite get it, but he liked it.

They were about to enter the tunnel. Even when he was right in front of it, Sparky couldn't make out anything. Angel and Flute kept playing; he wondered if they even noticed it.

The darkness loomed over them. For a moment, Sparky thought it might be okay to go inside. What did he have to fear?

It looked much darker up close. Much, much darker.

He let go of Angel's ankle.

_ **Her mind is Tiffany-twisted,** _

_ **She's got the Mercedes Benz,** _

_ **She's got a lot of pretty, pretty boys,** _

_ **That she calls friends,** _

_ **How they dance in the courtyard,** _

_ **Sweet summer sweat,** _

_ **Some dance to remember,** _

_ **Some dance to forget...** _

At least two dozen others were dancing around them, but Felix felt as if he and Elastico owned the floor. He could move in any way at all, and Elastico would transform it into a stellar show of acrobatics. The raise of an arm would become a flip over Felix's head. A duck would lead to a handstand on Felix's shoulders. And a simple twirl would end with Elastico falling into Felix's arms. Felix thought he looked incredibly suave even though he felt like Elastico was doing all the work. But it was fun, and if Elastico had taught him anything, it was to focus on the fun.

When they were done, they found their way to the foyer, where they sat together halfway up the wide, crimson-carpeted stairs.

"Phew," Elastico said as he began his cooldown stretches, tucking his left arm behind his head to hold his right as it reached for the ceiling.

"Feel good?"

"Ih," Felix said.

"Naga forget stretches. Make muscles feel better."

Felix joined in, mirroring Elastico's movements. "Youga so good at dancing," he said, earning a wide smile from his dance partner.

"Taka," Elastico said.

"Wish meega was as good."

They were both silent for a while. Elastico didn't respond until they'd worked their way to their left legs, stretching them across their laps.

"Felix was very good," he said. "He practiced at home. Said he put pillows on floor after falling too much."

"Yeah..." Felix said, letting his voice drop to its natural tone. "I'm not as good, am I? I haven't been practicing."

"Youga okitaka. Practice makes perfect," Elastico said as they switched to the right leg.

"Youga know...Felix ask meega to move in."

Felix didn't answer.

"Say we together except when we go home. If we have same home, then always together."

"That sounds nice," Felix said. "What did you say?"

Elastico finished stretching, resting his hands on his knees and looking down as if entranced by them. It was the stillest that Felix had seen him all evening. His smile melted away.

"Said naga ready...Meega live with circus ohana for so long. Remember hiding in rafters, watching shows, copying tricks...Going to new home, even just until next show...Isa scary."

"Don't you walk on tightropes and juggle fire and swallow swords and everything?" Felix asked. "How can moving be any scarier than those?"

"Meega know," Elastico said, absent-mindedly stretching his toes. "Isa scary in different way...Still, Felix brave enough to try new things. Dancing, tightrope, handstands...But meega naga brave. Even for Felix..." He shut his eyes, squeezing out tears.

"If meega was, then Felix naga home alone...Then..." His voice devolved into trembling breaths.

Felix shut his eyes and discovered that he had also been crying. He reached up, wiped a tear from his cheek, then brought his claw down, observing the tear resting upon it. It was warmer than he thought it would be. He felt sick. Deathly sick.

Elastico sighed. "Tired. Gonna go to bed." He stood up and began climbing up the massive steps. He walked so lightly; it seemed as if he was floating.

"Hey, El?" Felix said. He'd meant to say 'Elastico,' but somehow, his mouth couldn't be bothered. He looked over his shoulder to find a smile that seemed torn between eagerness and devastation.

"I'm sorry."

"I know," Elastico said. He carried on up the steps and then disappeared.

Felix felt even sicker.

_ **So I called up the Captain,** _

_ **"Please bring me my wine,"** _

_ **He said, "We haven't had that spirit here since 1969,"** _

_ **And still those voices are calling from far away,** _

_ **Wake you up in the middle of the night,** _

_ **Just to hear them say...** _

The dinner rush was Slushy's most and least favorite part of the evening. He loved it because he got to meet so many different people, but he hated that there was never enough time to spend with any of them. He skated around the dining hall, swerving gracefully between the array of white-clothed tables and their black-suited guests. All the while, he balanced massive trays as if he were a set of scales.

Next up were a beef chop suey and a fish and chips for Chopsuey and Daniel.

"How's that book you're reading, Dan?" Chopsuey asked.

"Superlative," Daniel said. "I'm almost done. If you want, you can borrow it after I'm finished."

"Superlative?"

"Yeah. Didn't I tell you I was reading the dictionary?"

After that was a fettuccine alfredo and a New York strip steak for Clip and Hammerface.

"You really think I'd look good in a ponytail?" Hammerface asked.

"Sure," Clip said. "Not a long one. Long enough that you can see it but short enough to suit you."

"Maybe I want a long one," he said with a grin.

She sighed. "Good thing I'm here to save you from yourself."

After that was a sushi platter for Nani and David.

"You know, there's another surfing competition coming up soon," David said. "You should go."

"I don't know," Nani said. "I'm nowhere near as good as I used to be."

"Don't you get practice every time we all go to the beach?"

"That's not the same. I'm not surfing to impress anyone then. I'm just doing it so everyone has a good time."

"Who says that isn't impressive?"

Then a gazpacho soup and a quinoa bowl for Heat and Kixx.

"So, what do you wanna do when we're done here?" Kixx asked. "We could go bowling, or see a movie, or walk around the beach."

"We could just hang out in our room," Heat said.

"Really? Ya sure?"

"Whatever you want, booj. I'm just happy that we can finally properly hang out."

Finally, a loco moco and a hunter's chicken for Belle and Sample.

Sample signed something. Belle signed back, and they both lit up with silent laughter.

Slushy couldn't tell what they'd said. He'd had to learn so much here, much more than Dr. Hamsterviel had told him he would have to. Music, books, sports, food. He hadn't gotten around to sign language yet. He felt like a wall had shot up between him and Belle and Sample.

With his orders delivered, Slushy hurried back to the kitchen. He passed through a black curtain leading to a dimly-lit tunnel connecting the kitchen and the dining room.

Instead of carrying on, he turned around and peeked through the curtain. Everyone was still chatting away over their entrees.

Slushy wanted to talk to them. He wanted to know what other superlative new words Daniel had learned, and if Clip thought he would look good with a ponytail. He wanted to ask Nani if surfing was difficult, or Kixx what other fun things there were to do this late.

And Belle and Sample...Watching them sign to each other, he felt as if something were missing from him. He wondered if the real Slushy knew what it was.

He glanced back at the door to the kitchen. He knew he had to go back in, that he had to take more orders out, but he didn't want to. He wanted to go out into the dining room, to sit down with the other guests, but he knew that he couldn't. He was still on the clock.

All he could do was stand there in the tunnel, watching the guests and wondering when his shift would end.

_ **Mirrors on the ceiling,** _

_ **Pink champagne on ice,** _

_ **And she said, "We are all just prisoners here of our own device,"** _

_ **And in the master's chambers,** _

_ **They gathered for the feast,** _

_ **They stab it with their steely knives,** _

_ **But they just can't kill the beast...** _

"Blitznak," Houdini said, finding a four of clubs in the mirror when she wanted a jack of hearts.

She looked down at the illustrated instructions in the book on her desk. She'd done what they'd told her to the letter this and the previous fourteen times. What could she possibly be doing wrong? She racked her brain until it hurt, but she just couldn't pinpoint her mistake.

Perhaps she needed to take a break. There was still plenty of time until her show started. Even so, wandering out of her dressing room and around the hotel did little to ease her anxiety. She knew a break would do her good, but it didn't feel right to be so unprepared with mere hours to go before her next performance. She hoped that, at least, nobody would raise an eyebrow at her walking about with her hat, cape, and cane.

Should she just stick with making things disappear? She knew she could do that; Doctors Hamsterviel and Jumba had seen to that ages ago. But she knew that people would be expecting more than just invisibility tricks. They would want to see cards, rabbits out of a hat, volunteers sawed in half, and then miraculously reassembled. All the things she hadn't figured out yet. Doctor Hamsterviel insisted that those things didn't matter. Still, Houdini was discovering more and more that they very much did matter. It didn't matter how perfectly she could mimic Experiment 604 if she couldn't mimic Houdini.

She passed a part of the hallway illuminated by the gray light from outside. The massive glass window seemed to be melting as drops of rain struck it before crawling down. She passed by it, spending all of five seconds in its gray light before returning to the hotel's golden glow.

Turning a corner, she spotted an open set of double doors that she couldn't remember seeing before. A plaque above it read, _'Gallery.' _She found herself drawn into the room, perhaps because she couldn't think of anywhere better to go.

Beyond the door was a tremendous crimson velvet room that split off into rows upon rows of corridors. Each was filled with guests gazing intently at the walls.

Past the corridors, Houdini spotted Lilo, Stitch, and Angel sitting on a bench and facing the far wall. Their heads rested against one another. Houdini didn't think that would be comfortable, but the three of them still made it seem that way. As she approached them, Lilo and Angel stood up. They whispered into Stitch's ears. He nodded, and then they smiled before leaving him.

Houdini was soon close enough to see what was so fascinating about this wall; it was decorated with framed paintings. They lined the wall in tall, long rows. Each was drawn in watercolors that made them seem as beautifully blurred as the rain on the window outside. They were all of Stitch.

In the upper left corner, the first painting saw him as a blue patch roaring into an inferno of swirling orange. Looking at it made Houdini sweat; it seemed as if the monster therein might crawl out of the frame and lunge at her.

After that, Stitch was depicted peeking out from a dark cage. His black eyes were both curious and conniving.

The next showed only his back amid a sea of shadowy gray. The brightest color was a tiny bundle of white forming a baby swan perched on top of his head.

Then he was on a green cliff, reaching down to offer a piece of golden bread to a glistening orange fish.

Then he was grinning as he played his ukulele. He seemed to be floating. Stars of gold and white glowed behind him.

After that was...Nothing. Just rows and rows of empty frames.

Houdini looked away from them. She found Stitch smiling at her over his shoulder. He tapped the empty seat beside him. She obliged, waving her cape over the bench and resting her hands on her cane.

"What youga think?" Stitch asked.

"They look incredible," Houdini said. "Did you make them?"

"Had help. Youga have favorite?"

Houdini scrolled through them again; the monster, the trickster, the baby swan, the fish-feeder, and the musician.

"I don't know," she said. She was drawn back to the monster; she wasn't convinced that it wasn't looking back at her.

"But I know which one I like the least."

"Oh?"

She used her cane to point at the monster. That way, she could use it to fend the beast off in case it leaped out.

"Ah," Stitch said, his smile fading. "Ih. Meega naga like that one, either."

"Why keep it up, then?" Houdini asked.

Stitch looked up at the firey painting. To Houdini's surprise, his black eyes seemed to regard it not with fear, but with sorrow.

"Because isa still Stitch," he said.

"But it isn't," Houdini said. "It can't be. You haven't followed your programming in ages; that's what Dr. Hamsterviel told me. Experiment 626 was designed to level cities and wipe out armies. If you don't do that, then you're not 626."

Stitch glanced down at Houdini, then returned to the painting. "626 isa still Stitch. Everyone here isa Stitch."

"...I'm not sure I understand."

"Paintings all different, ih?"

"Yeah."

"Stitch isa different, too. There all different Stitches in here..." He placed a hand on his chest.

"Always different Stitches. But all are meega. If meega naga like being one, meega can always change."

"Just like that?" Houdini was surprised at her own eagerness.

Stitch shook his head. "Naga. Can be hard...Sometimes meega hear 626. _'My turn again,' _he says. But meega naga listen."

"But you still keep his picture up?"

"Meega naga listen, but meega remember. _Want _to remember."

"I still don't get it." Houdini looked the other way, down to the painting of Stitch floating away with his ukulele.

"If you think what you are now is so much better, why remember how you used to be? Doesn't it...?"

"Hurt?"

"...Yeah."

"Sometimes...Some days, meega remember things from before and still feel sorry. But if meega remember, then know meega can always change."

Houdini now found herself drawn to the empty frames. They were like black holes on the wall, drawing her gaze into their gravitational force.

"You keep talking about change like it makes everything better," she said. "But doesn't it ever scare you? How do you know you won't change into something worse?"

Stitch observed the empty frames. His tall ears hid behind his shoulders. Moments later, they shot back up again as if jumping for joy.

"Meega always have choice," he said. "And ohana. If meega remember that, then meega think new paintings will be even better."

"You sure you can do better?"

"Ih. Meega can always do better."

Houdini sighed and shut her eyes. She needed a break from the paintings.

"I'm not like you," she said. "I'm not like any of you. I can barely even _pretend _to be like you."

She felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Meega started with pretending, too," Stitch said. "Meega naga good at pretending, either...But real thing naga like pretending. Maybe seem harder, but isa easier."

"I just..." Houdini said, keeping her eyes shut and clutching her cane as tightly as she could.

"I just don't know..."

She felt the hand leave her shoulder.

"Isa okitaka," Stitch said. "Just take time. Gallery isa always open."

She heard his footsteps on the velvet carpet, yet somehow, it still felt as though he were sitting next to her.

Her palms sweated against her cane.

Finally, she opened her eyes again. They surprised her with a film of tears. She broke it with a blink.

She wanted to see the one with the baby swan again.

_ **Last thing I remember,** _

_ **I was running for the door,** _

_ **I had to find the passage back,** _

_ **To the place I was before,** _

_ **"Relax," said the night man,** _

_ **"We are programmed to receive..."** _

The only trouble with vacations is their final days. The excitement of the first day is inverted, playing out in reverse in a day-long trek where everything screams out, _'back to the grind!' _It's the tax that all vacationers must pay.

That was what Spooky thought as he towed his suitcase to the reception desk. Going from his room, then past the lazy river, the dance hall, the dining room, and the gallery, he felt as if a shadowy hand was dragging them all away from him. If he could, he would reach out and try to take them back, but he knew he couldn't. His reservation was finished.

The foyer seemed emptier than ever. There was nothing but the marble floor, the reception desk, the towering double doors, and the pictures on the walls. Spooky suddenly realized that he'd never given them a proper look. There were hundreds of them, all organized into neat groups that made shapes like diamonds and ovals. Some were of fish; he spotted one with a sandwich held tightly in its mouth. Others were of large Earthlings who Spooky assumed were previous guests. Many, however, seemed to be crayon doodles. Spooky recognized them as rounded, simplistic likenesses of his...He supposed the word was 'cousins.' They seemed out-of-place with the other photographs...Yet, at the same time, they blended right in.

Spooky found a line by the desk. Drowsy, Sparky, Felix, Slushy, and Houdini stood in front of it, all looking agitated. They wobbled on their feet as they clutched the handles of their suitcases. Spooky couldn't help but notice that their bags were all identical to his.

He noticed a bell on the desk. "Has anyone rung?" He asked.

"No," Slushy said. "We were waiting for you."

"Oh. Right, of course." With that, he slithered up to the desk and tapped the bell. Its chime echoed throughout the foyer.

"What can I do for you?" Lilo asked. She looked different than the last time Spooky had seen her, now wearing a sky blue button-up shirt patterned with spiraling green palm trees and a lei of purple flowers.

Spooky couldn't remember if she'd already been at the desk.

"I'd like to check out," he said.

"You sure you don't want to extend your stay?" Lilo asked. "We have plenty of vacancies."

"It's not that I don't want to," Houdini said. "I...I just can't."

"The problem..." Slushy said. "Is that I was made to copy the powers of all the others. But they're so much more than their powers."

"And I don't know if I'm any more than mine," Felix said. "I wasn't scared when Dr. Hamsterviel sent me here, but now I am."

"I know you and..." Sparky said. "What were their names again...Flute and Ace and Yin and Yang...I know you weren't trying to scare me. But everything you've been telling me, the things you say I can do because you all did them before...I'm too scared of what will happen if it turns out I can't do those things."

"So what if..." Drowsy said. "Nothing changes? What if I just go back to the job Dr. Hamsterviel gave me and pretend I never came here to begin with? You're going to find a way to stop Dr. Hamsterviel anyway. You've done it before; you'll do it again."

"Just throw me under the same bus," Spooky said. "And you can all go back to the lives you had before I came along and ruined them."

Lilo's face fell. Spooky was drawn to her lei. It looked like it should have a wonderful aroma, but Spooky couldn't smell anything.

"Or will you not let me?" He asked. "You said I had a choice, right? You said I don't _have _to be like this, but that doesn't mean that I _can't. _If I have a choice, then I can choose to just forget all this and keep going. I can choose to just leave all this behind. Isn't that right?" He tried his best to sound angry, but only when he stopped talking did he feel the sweat on his face and hear the desperation in his voice.

Lilo turned away. She looked as if she were talking to someone, but there was nobody else behind the desk. Soon, she returned, placing a thin black binder and a pen in front of Spooky.

At first, she seemed as if she would match Spooky's monologue with one of her own. Instead, she simply said, "you can check out any time you like."

Spooky sighed. He thought something more would come of all this, but it seemed as though there was nothing left to say. He'd had his vacation, and now it was over. Time to go home.

He opened the binder and signed his name on the first empty line.

_Experiment 628._

He turned around to look at his associates, but they weren't there.

Of course they weren't.

He stormed over to the enormous doors. He threw them open as if he were pulling out a splinter.

The rain was relentless; there was too much to even see a few feet ahead. Some giant galactic entity might have been spraying the Earth with a cosmic fire hose. It impacted the pavement with a thunderous noise, as though it were trying to break through the ground.

There was nothing ahead but six silhouettes. He squinted and found that he recognized them. Drowsy, Sparky, Felix, Slushy, Houdini, and Spooky glared at him from the torrential rain. Their fur looked like it was melting.

Lightning sliced through the black sky behind them. They opened their mouths and spoke with voices like thunder.

_"But you can never leave!"_

**VII**

625 watched the others from atop a palm tree on Yin and Yang's island. Nearly everyone was there, bustling about as Remmy and Lilo, who clutched a heavily-mechanized spatula, rematerialized in a bubble of green light.

625 had to chuckle at the night's chain of events. All he'd said once Lilo answered the door was, _'Jumba needs your help.' _From that, this whole operation had flourished.

"How did it go?" Chopsuey asked as Lilo returned the spatula to him.

"We got there a bit late," Lilo said. "I think Jumba's old dream-teleporter-thingy-whatsit is nearly dead."

"And 628?"

"I don't think he noticed."

"We're lucky he wasn't more questioning," Remmy said. "I nearly had a heart attack earlier when the water in the lazy river didn't spawn in."

"But we had to use Plan D," Lilo said.

"Ah," Chopsuey said. "I thought we might...Do you think it worked?"

"Maybe. We got kicked out right after, though. I think he's awake now."

"Then I guess we'll find out soon enough."

"Oh, Jason," Remmy said, floating over to the Kawena brothers and Nani. They were keeping watch for 628 at one edge of the island.

"Thanks again for lending us that blueprint for your hotel on the Big Island."

"Anything to make sure 628 has the most luxurious dream possible," Jason said. "...And, of course, to help our cousins."

"Yeah..." Remmy folded his arms as his gaze was drawn to the horizon. A line of purple was stretching across the water.

625 kept looking around. He'd seen dozens of Experiments imprisoned in Gantu's ship, but this was different. There were no cells, no rules, no looming threat of being sent to Hamsterviel. It was simply them, perhaps as they were always meant to be, regardless of Gantu, Jumba, and even Hamsterviel's best efforts.

Yin and Yang kept watch on another end of the island. 625 overheard Yin say, "I hope he hasn't done anything to my Bruce CDs."

Then he heard Yang respond, "relax. What could he possibly dislike about the Boss?"

Ace hovered a ways above them, keeping his own lookout while jotting away in a notepad.

Dupe was practicing kicks against a shorter palm tree. He drove his heel straight into it, then dropped to the ground, rubbing his foot with one hand and wiping his eyes with the other.

Elastico was engaged in the unthinkable act of sitting still on the shore. His feet were in the water, and his head was hung. Heat and Kixx were seated on either side of him, each with a hand on one of his shoulders.

Chopsuey regarded the mechanical spatula in his hands as if it were an injured animal. He managed a slight smile when Daniel came up beside him and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"We've done all we can," Daniel said.

"Yeah," Chopsuey said. "For now, at least."

"Enjoying view?"

625 snapped back as if out of a trance. Angel had taken a seat beside him on his tree and was tuning her guitar.

"Oh," 625 said. "Hey, er-Aloha."

"Aloha," she said with a smile.

The seconds went by like hours before 625 thought of something else to say. He remembered how fast he'd talked around Angel in the past; all the _'hello, hotcakes' _and _'sorry, sweetlips.' _His memory of himself turned to him and said, _'sometime today, dummy.'_

"How'd, uh..." He finally managed, "how'd it go?"

"Okitaka," Angel said, "Think 628 listen, just seemed scared."

"Yeah. I know what that's like..."

"And youga?"

"Huh?"

"What youga up to these days?"

"Oh, uh, not much. Just enjoyin' the wide-open spaces, ya know? Been, uh...Been doin' a lotta karaoke."

"Youga sing?" Angel perked up. Her antennae waved about behind her head.

"A little, yeah. Just tryin' out different hobbies."

"Different isa good."

"...You're different, too. The guitar, the hair, even your voice sounds different."

"Ih. Meega mezzo now."

"It's crazy. You're nothin' like you were, but I...I still recognize ya...It's just..." He felt his memory glaring at him again.

"Gaba?"

"Even the way I feel about ya is different...I mean, I like ya, but back then, back in Gantu's, I used to..."

"Ih," Angel said. "Meega know." She strummed a few notes.

625 recognized the riff from _All For Leyna _and had to chuckle.

"But that feeling's gone now," he said. "I guess that means...It wasn't real, right?"

Angel nodded.

"I...I'm sorry."

"Isa okitaka," she said. "Means youga real now."

625 smiled. "Sure feels like it."

Angel strummed a few more notes. "Happy youga came back, Reuben."

625 felt like a bucket of hot water had been splashed on his face. "Come again?"

"What youga think? Meega and Lilo thought youga like it; isa sandwich."

"You mean...?"

Angel just smiled and kept playing.

625 ran an arm over his eyes.

"Youga okitaka?" Angel asked.

"I've just something in my eyes."

"Looks like tears."

"I'm not cryin'."

"Naga like name? Maybe Schmitter-?"

"I like the name," Reuben said, lowering his arm and blinking his tears away. "Thank you...I promise...I'm gonna keep bein' real for you guys."

Angel grinned and played one last winding riff.

"We've got a sighting," Ace suddenly called.

Reuben and Angel slid down the tree, rushing to join everyone at the island's shore. A stark white speedboat was revving towards them.

"Oh, thank goodness," Yang said. "He hasn't dented it."

It slowed to a halt as it neared the shore, its winding groan fading into the plinking of the gentle waves beneath it. A familiar blob of green ink slithered to the bow to meet them. His black eyes were cracked and red. He looked at them as if waiting for them to speak, then realized that they were waiting for him.

"I can take you to Hamsterviel," 628 said. "I...I want to help you."

He was answered with a sea of relieved smiles. He looked between them all as if wondering what they could mean.

Finally, his eyes landed on Yin.

"I've still got your Springsteen CDs."


	20. Episode 19: I Want To Break Free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Experiments head into space to rescue their cousins with the help of a new ally.
> 
> Songs Featured:  
*"I Want To Break Free" by Queen

**Episode 19: ** _ **I Want To Break Free** _

**I**

628 felt beyond peculiar with so many of his supposed enemies inside his ship. There he sat in the place from his old life as the people from the one he might have roamed around him. He was being crushed in a defection sandwich.

He'd already set an autopilot course for Dr. Hamsterviel's headquarters on Quelte Quan. All he had to do now was gaze at his unlikely passengers throughout the control room.

He found Bonnie and Clyde on the ceiling. They had removed a panel and were now up to their shoulders in the ship's wiring.

"We nabbed one 'a these models back in the old days, right?" Bonnie asked.

"This one's a newer make, though," Clyde said. "So, you thinkin' we can cut the heat-sensin' functions?"

"Yeah, then Captain Jacques can't read 'em as we're comin' in. He won't know just how many people are comin' to rain on his parade."

"Nice. Ya remember which cable that is in these ones?"

"Fifty-percent sure it's the red one."

There was a bright yellow flash and a short _bang _from the open panel, followed by a few thin smoke wisps. Bonnie and Clyde were silent for a while.

"Before ya get mad," Bonnie finally said, "I did only say fifty-percent."

Elsewhere, Hammerface and Heat sat against the wall, their hands clasped tightly together as Hammerface breathed long, calculated breaths.

"It's gonna be okay, Hamster," Clip said, stroking behind his ear with a long claw from her free hand.

"I'll be with you the whole time. We all will."

"I know, booj," he said. "I'm more grateful for that than you'll ever know. And I know I'd just feel worse staying on Earth while my cousins are in trouble...Still, seeing Gantu and Hamsterviel again..."

He shut his eyes. Clip squeezed his hand in both of hers, waiting for what may have been hours. He then turned to her, forcing his face into one of conviction.

"I can do it," he said. "This time, I know I can."

Most everyone sat cross-legged in the center of the room, surrounding Angel, Stitch, and Flute as they gave a calm performance with their guitar, ukulele, and flute. Elastico, Dupe, and Kixx were among the most attentive listeners, gazing at the performers' strumming claws as if drawn into some intense trance.

_"I want to break free,_

_"I want to break free,_

_"I want to break free from your lies,_

_"You're so self-satisfied,_

_"I don't need you,_

_"I've got to break free,_

_"God knows,_

_"God knows I want to break free..."_

"628?"

He blinked, and Lilo, Chopsuey, and Daniel reappeared in his vision.

"Sorry," he said. "I was..."

"It's okay," Lilo said.

"We're just going over the plan again," Chopsuey said. "Can we hear you go over it just so we know we're all on the same page?"

628 thought. There was a plan-sized hole in his memory. He tilted his head, looking between Chopsuey and Daniel at Stitch, Angel, and Flute.

_"I've fallen in love,_

_"I've fallen in love for the first time,_

_"And this time, I know it's for real..."_

Oh. There it was.

"Team A is 621, 627-..." He began. "Oh, blitznak."

"It's okay," Daniel said.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

"I've gotta stop doing that."

"You'll have plenty of time for that," 621 said. "But right now, we need to make sure that you're ready."

"Right," 628 said. "Right..." He took one more peek.

_"God knows,_

_"God knows I've fallen in love..."_

"Team Aerosmith is Chopsuey, Daniel, and me," he began. "You're going to pretend to be my prisoners, and I'm going to pretend that I'm a duplicate sent to take you to Hamsterviel, just like before. We're going to be distracting him.

"Team Bowie is Finder, Bonnie, Clyde, Reuben, Sample, Belle, Hammerface, Clip, Yin, and Yang. They're going to sneak to the Dean's office and shut off the university's power. They'll also incapacitate Gantu if they come across him.

"Team Creedence is Stitch, Angel, Flute, Kixx, Heat, Elastico, Remmy, Dupe, Plasmoid, Thresher, and Ace. Once the power's out, they're going to storm the place, break the prisoners out, and then head straight back here. They'll also deal with Gantu if there's no other option.

"Team Dylan is Lilo, Nani, David, and Jason, staying here on the ship. They'll be in contact with your friend in the Federation, Pleakley. Once we've all completed our objectives and return to the ship, they'll give him the all-clear to have the Galactic Command take over and capture Hamsterviel."

"Couldn't have said it better myself," Chopsuey said. "Oh, and one more thing..."

"I'll be holding onto your bow and quiver," 628 added. "As well as the button to release your restraints. I can keep it hidden when I'm..." He glanced down at his inky, formless body. He'd never been undisguised for this long. It felt strange. He hated it.

"When I'm like this...If we have to fight at any point, I'll set you free and pass you your weapons."

"Excellent," Chopsuey said. "Now, we should go make sure everyone else is up to speed."

With that, he and Daniel began their final check-ins, leaving 628 with Lilo.

"You did really good," she said.

"All I did was memorize a plan," 628 said. "That's all I've ever done."

"I mean remembering everyone's names."

"Oh...Well, I already knew them. It's thinking of them before the numbers that I need to get the hang of."

"It's a great first step."

628 sighed. "A better one would've been to have left you all alone."

Lilo's face fell at that. "You know, I once punched someone in the face."

"That so?"

"Well, it wasn't once; it was a few times. And I also pushed her. And pulled her hair. And bit her."

"Why?"

"I was angry at something she said about me."

"What'd she say?"

Lilo thought for a moment. Her brow furrowed as she strained to remember but then relaxed.

"It's funny; I can't remember anymore. I know it was something about me, and it made me really, really, _really _mad at the time...But then I just felt worse. I tried apologizing to her later, and even though she didn't accept it, I felt a little better knowing that I was trying to fix my mistake."

"Well, I did a lot more than just hitting or biting any of you," 628 said. "And I didn't do it because of anything you said about me. You didn't even know I existed until...Flute found me out."

"But Hamsterviel said something about you, right?"

628's mind froze for a moment.

_Disguise...Capture...Send...Infiltrate...Integrate...Reeducate..._

"Yeah," he finally said. "He did."

"Sometimes people do things because somebody says things about them," Lilo said. "It's weird because even though they're someone they don't like very much, what they say still seems so important when really it isn't."

"I know..." 628 said.

"It's better to listen to people you _do _care about and who care about you."

628 dropped in on the performance again. He'd been drawn to the defective Experiments' shows many times during his assignment. They'd been among the most strenuous parts, as he had to keep reacting and playing along as he figured that whoever he was replacing would. He never heard the music over the voice in his head screaming, _'jump higher! Shout louder! Dance better! They're going to figure you out again, you idiot!'_

But now that pressure was gone, and he could finally hear the lyrics.

_"It's strange, but it's true,_

_"I can't get over the way you love me like you do,_

_"But I have to be sure,_

_"When I walk out that door,_

_"Oh, how I want to be free..."_

He could memorize lyrics easily. If anyone there had asked him to recite an entire album, he was certain he could do it. He didn't feel as confident about figuring out what they meant. This one, however, seemed to be on the tip of his tongue...

But he couldn't quite narrow it down.

"You mean like all of you?" He asked Lilo.

"Yeah," she said, lighting up.

"Really? After everything I've done?"

"Really. After everything _we've _done."

628's mind froze again.

When he returned, all he had to say was, "Okay."

With that, he slithered away, going towards the performance. He found a spot at the edge of the circle of audience members, not wanting to disturb any of them.

_"Oh, how I want to be free,_

_"Oh, how I want to break free."_

He caught Flute's eye. He tried to jerk his head away, but it wouldn't budge. He hoped that Flute would find something more interesting to look at, but she held his gaze.

628 wasn't sure, but he thought he saw a smile curling from behind her flute.

**II**

"Everyone ready?" Chopsuey announced.

628's right ear crackled with a chor of _yes, ih, _and _as I'll ever be._

"I'm ready," he said.

Chopsuey nodded. He turned around so his back faced 628, while the metal box restraining his four arms faced the ship's airlock door. He looked at Daniel, who stood beside him wearing his own restraints.

"You sure you want to come?" He asked. "You could be on one of the other teams."

"I'd rather stay with you," Daniel said.

Chopsuey smiled. They leaned in to touch their noses together.

"I need to stop making you do crazy things for me," Chopsuey said.

"You never made me do anything," Daniel replied.

The airlock slid open. 628 clutched Daniel and Chopsuey by tufts of fur at the base of their necks while they hunched over. Through the reflection in the rising metal, 628 could see them putting on defiant glares.

The door opened to the rooftop of what had once been the Quelte Quan Insitute of Science and Technology. A crimson suit and wide, white grin stood out against the foggy sky.

"Good day, Experiment 628," Hamsterviel said. "My, you really are the gift that keeps on giving."

His voice was loud, yet it went through 628's ears like a corrosive slime.

628 stepped out, pushing Daniel and Chopsuey hard enough to look convincing but not so hard as to make them stumble. The air was much stuffier than he remembered. He already missed the seaside.

Looking up, he found a hovering platform following behind Hamsterviel. Jumba was on it, his arms held down by metal straps to a chair and desk. He went pale at 628's gaze.

"Look who's come to join us, Jumba," Hamsterviel said. "Isn't the triangle-headed one the one you went and made behind my back?"

"So it is being okay when you do evil genius things without me," Jumba said, "but not the vicing of versas?"

"Yes, precisely. I am glad that you are finally paying attention." Hamsterviel approached Daniel, taking hold of his ears, eyes, nose, and teeth in turn and examining them.

"Hey, uh..." Daniel said, "if you tell me what you're looking for, I could help you find it."

"Hmph," Hamsterviel said. "Clean, polite, well-spoken, jovial. This one was supposed to be the most evilly evil of all my evil Experiments. Instead, it is exactly the opposite."

"That's right. I'm a complete and utter failure. If it disgusts you so much, imagine how I must feel."

"I cannot be bothered. And this one..." Hamsterviel turned to Chopsuey, taking particular interest in his mohawk and teeth.

"I am thankful to have this one back. I always thought it would make an ideal captain. With a little convincing, it may yet still."

Chopsuey growled. "'This one' is gonna need a lot more than a _little _convincing, _Jacques."_

Hamsterviel only blinked at that. "If you ask me, Jumba," he said.

"Nobody is," Jumba said.

"Then I would say your influence is almost completely gone. All the ones I've already reclaimed, I see more of these stupid Earth people in them than you or even my own genius self. These two are no different. It is as though that small female has taken our work, smeared her own ignorance all over it, and waved it around saying, _look at how much smarter I am than that monumentally stupid idiot Jacques Hamsterviel! _But then, as they say, things will stay the same the more they change."

"Well, they don't say it like that," Daniel said.

Hamsterviel turned in his direction, only to look as if it had merely been the wind.

"Oh, but it is getting rather chilly outside, yes, 628?"

"It is, Dr. Hamsterviel," 628 said. The words fell from his lips like drool.

"Then why don't we give our new guests a tour?"

As he spoke, 628's right ear crackled again.

_"Team Bowie," _Finder's voice said. _"Mission go. Youga good, Team Aerosmith?"_

628 looked at Hamsterviel. His red eyes felt like daggers aimed at his throat.

"Yes," he said, "Dr. Hamsterviel."

**III**

The tour was torture. Hamsterviel's endless ramblings made the dark halls of the university as suffocating as outside. It was only made worse by the silence of Daniel, Chopsuey, and Jumba. The only other sound was 628's occasional "yes, Dr. Hamsterviel."

Every so often, some momentary relief from Hamsterviel's lecture would come in the form of the members of Team Bowie checking in. Apart from the tingle in his right ear, 628 appreciated the fleeting distraction.

_"Yeesh," _Bonnie said. _"No wonder this place is so stuffy. These air vents are dustier than Yang's taste in music."_

_"Excuse me," _Yang said. _"At least I _have _taste."_

_"Oh, no," _Clip said. _"Belle, please don't sneeze."_

"I think this new decorum is an improvement," Hamsterviel said, kicking aside a fallen ceiling tile. "The outdatedness of the former faculty's philosophies is laid bare for all to see. Don't you agree, 628?"

_"Phew," _Clip said. _"Good catch, Sample."_

"Yes, Dr. Hamsterviel," 628 said.

Being there at all made 628 feel slimy. Not long ago, this had been his break. The pressure of perfecting so many voices, mannerisms, and minds would slide right off of him, and he could revel in the simplicity of being 628. Now, he was wearing the place backward. He wasn't sure what was worse, that a place so familiar could feel so malignant, or that pretending to be 628 was his easiest role yet.

Finally, the tour passed under a plaque reading, _Engineering Wing. _It seemed as if they'd stepped through a portal to another planet. The rest of the campus' darkness and decay were replaced with bright lights and pristine steel walls. It was the only living vein in the whole place.

_"Gantu spotted," _Clyde said. _"Looks like he's on his lunch break. Works out for us."_

_"Huh..." _Hammerface said. _"Feels weird seeing him again."_

_"No kiddin'," _Reuben said.

_"Get him now?" _Finder asked.

_"Temptin'..."_

_"No," _Hammerface said. _"We're only here for our cousins. We only deal with Gantu if he gets in our way."_

_"Yeah..." _Reuben said. _"You hopin' he does?"_

There was radio silence for a while.

_"A little bit...But I'll get over it. Won't be the first time, after all."_

The tour passed a reinforced glass wall, separating them from Hamsterviel's 'subjects.' 628 had always tried to ignore this part. This time, he had a piercing feeling in his gut, reminding him of the gallery.

Felix was stretching his arms over his head, trying to grasp his raised left foot. As he caught hold of a single toe-claw, he noticed the passers-by and fell to the floor. He rushed to the glass, staring after them with wide, hopeful eyes.

"Experiment 010," Hamsterviel said. "One of your minor successes, Jumba. There's some simple satisfaction to the ones you made purely to rectify the petty inconveniences of your life. That in itself might be as evil as creating an Experiment for actual destruction. Perhaps one day, when I feel a need to repurpose the rest of this place, this one will be of some use."

The next cell was the darkest one. Sparky sat in the corner, looking pale and exhausted. He nodded at Chopsuey and Daniel as his eyelids heaved themselves open.

"Once I have repaired Experiment 221," Hamsterviel said, "It will be endlessly useful against the Federation. It alone could rob entire planets of power within mere minutes. I could even tax people for electricity, for brief periods, of course. Until then, it cannot be trusted with too much energy. Only enough to keep it on standby."

628 didn't recognize the creature in the third cell. He was tall and thin, like a humanoid pin, and wore a red suit identical to Hamsterviel's. His glaring red eyes latched onto the passing scientist.

A sign on the glass warned; _Experiment 300 may assume the form of other individuals or creatures! Do not approach glass or attempt to free subject under any circumstances!_

"Who's the sign for?" Chopsuey asked. "Gantu can't be _that _dim, can he?"

Hamsterviel didn't answer. He simply moved on to the next cell, where Drowsy lay on the floor, facing the ceiling, with his eyes shut. His lips moved, but 628 and his accomplices heard nothing.

"The only thing more irritatingly irritating than getting my Experiments back," Hamsterviel said, "is _keeping _them here. No more Federation-issue trash like Gantu used the first time I attempted this operation. Only the finest reinforced, soundproof, fireproof, iceproof, forehead-proof glass and steel for my future army."

After that was a cell glowing orange. 628 felt humid just being a few feet away from it. Inside, a reddened Slushy sat cross-legged, eyes shut, and fists closed.

"Experiment 523 has been much too calm," Hamsterviel said. "That wretched blue planet has made all of them into passive, peace-loving nitwits. Jumba, you and that girl talk about change, but you can never truly change anything without ripping up what has come before."

"I think that is depending on what needs changing," Jumba said.

"Everything needs changing. _That _much should be obvious."

The next cell was covered by a tall screen. On it, Houdini's orange silhouette absent-mindedly twirled her hat on her finger.

"I've thought long and hard about it," Hamsterviel said, "but I think I am most disgusted by the ones that misuse my gifts for the entertainment of the unambitious masses. Even someone as insufferable as you, Jumba, must find it insufferable that they call us wrong, while they go off and build their livelihoods off of our work."

"I thought so once..." Jumba said. "But not anymore. We create them, but we do not own them."

Hamsterviel scoffed. "Who owns an idea if not whoever first thought of it? What point is there in creating anything, in trying to _change _anything, if it cannot be _controlled?!" _His red eyes fell to 628, and his glare softened.

"628, you're grateful for your gifts, aren't you?"

628 wanted to bite his lip.

"Yes, Dr. Hamsterviel."

_"Alright," _Bonnie said. _"We're in the Dean's office. Just give the all-clear when you're ready for lights-out."_

628 choked on his leaping heart.

"So," Chopsuey said, "what sort of special accommodations do you have for Dan and me?"

Hamsterviel didn't answer. He only stared at Houdini's cell. 628 was reminded of Stitch in the gallery, but something about Hamsterviel's face seemed much more anxious.

When he finally did look away, he grinned at 628.

"Today is shaping up to be one of my favorites," he said. "I am glad you brought these two to me today, 628. I believe I have finally narrowed down mine and Jumba's original mistake in each of my Experiments. I think these two should be the first to be corrected."

The tour was led to the end of the hall, where a wide entryway led to an octagonal laboratory. The walls were practically made of computer screens and consoles. Its centerpiece was a workbench decorated with neat stacks of files and a perfectly symmetrical assortment of tools. It might've looked more at home in some sort of office.

"So, what are you..." Daniel began to Hamsterviel, then looked up at Jumba. "Hey, Jumba, can you ask him what he's going to do to us?"

"No need," Jumba said. "He was explaining it before you arrived. He is wanting to put you and your cousins back into chambers. He will be writing new programming that will make you all like how you were, without possibility of ever changing."

"Very good, Jumba," Hamsterviel said, opening a drawer behind his desk. "So you _are_ capable of paying attention."

"While _you _are being very incapable of learning," Jumba said. "You tried doing just that to Stitch ages ago to amusingly embarrassing failure!"

"Failure is the greatest teacher, and you have been oh-so remarkably informative, Jumba. But now that I have told your friends something, perhaps they might enlighten me in return."

Hamsterviel took something out of the drawer. Bringing it to his face, he revealed that it was a black metal mask, wide enough to cover his mouth and nose.

"How many others are joining us today?"

628 felt like ice, then fire. He released his accomplices, reached into his inky form, seizing the restraint release button and Chopsuey's bow and quiver. A second later, Daniel and Chopsuey were free, and the former was armed.

"Punch it, Bonnie!" Chopsuey nocked two arrows.

In one moment, it was pitch black, and Hamsterviel let out a short yell. In another, the lights were back, and Hamsterviel was dangling on the wall from arrows in his jacket's shoulders.

_"Oh, come on," _Reuben said.

"I realize this place is not in the tidiest of conditions," Hamsterviel said, "but I am not so woefully disorganized as to overlook the benefits of a backup generator!"

_"Don't worry about it," _Bonnie said. _"We can still get those cell doors unlocked from here. Just means our little show's gonna have more spotlight than it did."_

628 heard a symphony of clicks in the hall far behind him while something hissed from up above.

_"Okitaka, Team Creedence," _Stitch said. _"Tookie bah-wah-bah!"_

"Hah," Jumba cheered, reeling back in his floating seat. He looked as if he would've flung his arms into the air if he could.

"I knew you were having rescue plan!"

"Well, I hope we're at least not being _too _predictable," Daniel said.

A new voice echoed in 628's ear. He hadn't spent much time with Captain Gantu, but that trenchant voice wasn't easy to forget.

_"Well, well, what have we here? I haven't been surrounded by so many tiny creatures I despised since my high school reunion."_

_"Aloha, fishlips," _Reuben said. _"Look at you. The more things change, the more they stay the same old big, stupid loser, huh?"_

_"I could say the same about you, 625."_

_"You know something, Gantu?" _Hammerface said. _"I remember you being taller."_

_"Hmph. Maybe this will jog your memory..."_

"Alright, Jumba," Daniel said, leaping onto Jumba's levitating platform.

"I think it's time for spring break."

628 heard another noise behind him; the sound of roaring metal. The next few seconds were a blur, and then he was taking Stitch's form, keeping a tremendous steel door aloft over his head. He could feel it fighting him, trying to press him into the floor like an insect under a thumb.

"What are you playing at, Jacques?" Chopsuey said, nocking another arrow.

Hamsterviel made no sound but the scratching breaths he made through his mask.

628 heard more hissing. He smelled something, too. It was like the eggs from the hotel, but much, much stronger.

_"Have no fear, cousins," _Ace said. _"The Remarkable Requitors are here to liberate you!"_

_"We never agreed on that name," _Thresher said.

_"Why not the Swingin' Lovers?" _Plasmoid said.

628 felt as if something were squeezing his brain.

"Dan," Chopsuey coughed as the room grew ever more pungent. "Hurry. We need to...To get...Jumba..."

"Trying..." Daniel wheezed. "Restraints...Reinforced...Same as glass..."

628 looked up. Jumba's head hung back over his seat. Daniel's hovering eyes flickered red like a broken TV screen.

The door pressed harder. 628 switched to the form of Flute, getting the door further up, but it continued to fight him.

The place shook. In the distance, 628 heard an echo proclaiming, _"Ob-la-di, ob-la-da!"_

_"Wow," _Clyde yelled. _"You've got him on the ropes, Belle!"_

_"Quick," _Hammerface shouted, _"someone grab his blaster!"_

_"On it," _Yin declared.

628 held his breath. He couldn't see any clouds or any trace of gas at all, but he felt like he was standing in a smokestack. His eyes were becoming as heavy as the door.

He burned up as he saw Daniel fall from Jumba's desk. He cooled down when he landed in Chopsuey's arms.

"Got you..." Chopsuey said, "Okay, Dan...Don't worry...I got..." He fell on his back, Daniel stretched across him.

628 turned to Hamsterviel, finding him free of the arrows and slowly approaching him.

"Come, now," he said, his voice crackling through the vents in his mask.

"Just relax. Take a nap. I promise all this will be better when you awaken."

The door forced 628 onto one knee. He turned into Kixx, getting himself back upright, but he felt like he might go again at any moment.

He looked over his shoulder. The cells had been emptied, while the cold hallway had become a merry crowd of joyous reunions.

Elastico and Kixx, with Heat on his shoulder, squeezed Felix and Houdini between them in a hug. Elastico planted a long kiss on Felix's cheek.

Dupe picked a dripping, scarlet Slushy up, wrapping his arm over his shoulders. Slushy managed a faint, pained, yet grateful smile.

Remmy and Drowsy clung to each other. Drowsy's eyes were wide open.

Angel laughed as Spooky landed playfully on her head, his inky form ruffling her skunk stripe.

Stitch pulled a pale Sparky onto his back as if he were a backpack. Sparky looked beyond exhausted, but he perked up a little when one of Stitch's lower arms emerged with a D battery in hand.

628 watched them undo the precious little progress he had made in his original mission. He felt something in his gut, something he thought he should've felt with each successful capture.

And then lightning struck in his suffocating mind. He couldn't sing or dance or recite poetry. He couldn't win at board games or do magic tricks or make delicious ice cream. Perhaps he couldn't do very much at all.

But he could complete missions.

With the strongest heave he could muster, he pushed back against the door, sending it back towards the ceiling. He then morphed instantly into Elastico, lassoed Daniel and Chopsuey in one elongated arm, then Jumba in another, and spun around, sliding them into the hallway.

He caught a glimpse of Flute running to retrieve her cousins. He saw her eyes as two purple pools amid the encroaching darkness of his vision.

And then he fell backward. The impact of the door against the floor came like a pillow hitting carpet. He barely felt his body dissolving from fur back to ink.

He was being carried. He couldn't even see Hamsterviel's silhouette.

In the darkness, he barely heard a scratchy, muffled voice.

_"This time..."_

**IV**

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel!"_

_"You will assume the form of the Experiment best suited to the mission at hand!"_

_"You will destroy any person, place, or thing bearing any symbol associated with the Galactic Federation of Planets!"_

_"You are a tool! You are a weapon! You are an asset!"_

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel!"_

The words formed towers around 628. They grew and stretched into a town, then a city, then a planet, then a galaxy. There was nothing anywhere but the words. The words were the sky. The words were his body. The words were his mind. He knew nothing but the words. He tried to imagine a place without the words, but the words were there, too. He had just discovered the words. He had known the words for centuries.

Yes, of course. It was all perfectly simple.

And then there were more words. Different words.

_"Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day...?"_

_"I wish I could swim...Like the dolphins..."_

_"When the rain washes you clean, you'll know..."_

_"Hey, baby, I'm just about starvin' tonight!"_

_"I'm naked, and I'm far from home..."_

_"Anyway, you'll never know...The many ways I've tried..."_

_"You can check out any time you like..."_

_"But I have to be sure when I walk out that door..."_

They came like meteors, ripping through the skyscrapers and forming a swirling inferno in the sky.

Why were they knocking down the city?

Why was the city in their way?

He tried to scream for them to stop, but his voice was nothing but the words.

And then there was a flash of light, and the words all flickered away like fireworks. Only a few remained.

_"And the most she will do is throw shadows at you..."_

And there was only one other thing with them.

"You," 628 said.

"I could say the same about you," Flute said.

"...I don't understand. Why are you here?"

"Don't ask me."

628 looked around. He wanted to see the words again, but there was nothing. Only a white sky above and below.

"So..." He said. "That's it, isn't it? I had a little break, and now I'm back where I started."

"Maybe," Flute said.

"Maybe?"

"Well, look around. What do you see?"

"Nothing...But those words...?"

"Who do you think put them there?"

"Hamsterviel...Then where did they go?"

"They're still there. You've just done what all of your cousins did. You broke your programming."

"Wait, so...Hamsterviel wants to reprogram us, but you've already betrayed your programming. All he'd be doing is giving you different things to ignore."

Flute smiled and nodded.

"But they'll still be there...And you have them in your heads, constantly, every day."

Flute's smile faded, and she nodded again. "We usually have it down to a whisper, but sometimes it gets a little louder."

"...I never asked for any of this. For Hamsterviel. For you."

"Nobody does, but that doesn't mean that you don't have a choice."

"But no matter what, I'm always going to have those words in my head..."

Flute nodded again.

"Right..."

He thought for a while.

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel!"_

_"And if you see my reflection..."_

"If I stop..." He finally said, "what will be in here?"

"Just you," Flute said.

"...And if I don't?"

She smiled.

He felt warm when she smiled.

"Just you."

**V**

_"Welcome, esteemed representatives of the Galactic Federation! A lifetime of willful ignorance, unambition, and stagnation has brought you all here, to me, and to my greatest creation! I invite you to do whatever you like! It will only make this first of many demonstrations all the more engrossing!"_

628 was awake on the university's rooftop. He always had and never been there. He saw his cousins gathered around their ship on the ground, looking up at him with eyes that mixed hope with terror. Above, three Galactic Command ships hovered like hammerhead sharks before their cornered prey.

The number of gazes on him made 628 feel like the nucleus of the universe.

Hamsterviel was in front of him, his white grin and crimson eyes as wide as they might ever be. They were like supernovas that seized 628's attention in their gravitational pull.

"Now, my Experiment," he cackled, "show me how quickly you can destroy these ships!"

628 heard somebody whispering in his ear.

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel."_

It echoed in his brain.

He stood still.

Hamsterviel's left eye twitched.

"Get to work, 628! Time is of the essence!"

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel."_

The voice got louder. It made 628's head throb.

He stood still.

"Did you go deaf during the reprogramming procedure?! I gave you an order!"

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel."_

628 felt like two hands had seized his brain and were throttling it.

He stood still.

_"Are you listening to me?! You have only one purpose: to follow my orders! That should not be difficult to follow! I have already done all the difficult parts for you! I know what must be done! Why won't you just do it, you stupid, stupid, stupid creature?!"_

_"You will obey all commands issued by Dr. Jacques Hamsterviel," _the voice grew slightly softer.

_"Do you know how long I spent making all of you?! Do you know what I had to give up just so you ungrateful trogs could open your eyes?! The least you could do is the one thing I designed you for...Please?!"_

Spit sprayed onto 628's face.

He stood still.

_"Please_!"

Hamsterviel seized where 628's shoulders would be.

He stood still.

His red eyes were wider. They were still like supernovas, but not because they had any kind of gravity.

Now, it was because they were dying.

"Please..." He gasped.

628 finally thought of something to say. Only then did he notice his tears mingling with the spit.

_"Baby, can't you see,_

_"I've got to break free."_


	21. Episode 20: Man In The Mirror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On Earth, 628 begins his new life with a new name.
> 
> Songs Featured:
> 
> *"Man In The Mirror" by Michael Jackson  
*"Brilliant Disguise" by Bruce Springsteen  
*"Drift Away" by Dobie Gray

**Episode 20: ** _ **Man In The Mirror** _

**I**

628 still felt like he was looking at Hamsterviel. He could still see those burning, desperate eyes.

He blinked and realized he was only looking in a dusty old mirror in the Pelekais' garage. He remembered watching the saurian officers taking away a taciturn Hamsterviel and a bartering Gantu, the words of thanks from the Grand Councilwoman, and the leisurely trip back to Earth with the rescued cousins, Jumba, and Pleakley in tow. However, he remembered it all like a dream. There had been so much. Yet, it seemed there was nothing between the university rooftop and the mirror in the garage.

His ears latched onto the music from the record player beside him, using it to anchor himself in that moment.

_"I'm gonna make a change, for once I'm my life,_

_"It's gonna feel real good, gonna make a difference,_

_"Gonna make it right..."_

"Aloha, cousin."

628 turned to find Lilo and Stitch entering the garage. He remembered squeezing in past Jumba's chaotic array of old inventions. Now his cousins could walk through a barren space. Only a workbench, a computer console, and a few stray contraptions remained, standing considerately at one side.

"Thirsty?" Stitch waved three glasses of lemonade, each in a different hand.

"Oh. Thanks," 628 said, taking one glass in an inky hand and setting it down on the nearby workbench. "I didn't realize how long I'd been in here. Jumba moved his stuff quicker than I thought."

"Heat and Kixx got here early," Lilo said. "So they helped him out." She was holding a plastic bowl filled with scrap pieces of paper.

"What's that?" 628 asked.

"Sorry we kept you waiting. We just needed to collect some names from a few more people."

"Names?"

"Ih," Stitch said. "Youga cousin. Cousins have names, naga numbers."

"Stitch and I were having trouble thinking of one you might like," Lilo said. "There were just so many we thought would work, sort of like how you can change into so many other cousins. So, we thought it'd make sense if all our other cousins thought up a name for you, and then we had you draw one. Then it'll be like you picked it, kind of. And even if you don't like it, you can pick a different one."

"Oh," 628 said. He tried to think of something more interesting to say, but his brain wouldn't cooperate. It kept giving him Hamsterviel's eyes again. Instead, he simply reached into the bowl and drew a name.

When he read it, he felt both underwhelmed and elated. It felt like a rollercoaster was corkscrewing in his gut.

_"Leroy," _he said.

"Think that was Belle's," Stitch said.

"How come?" Lilo asked.

"Queen. _Leroy Brown, _youga know?"

"Right. She does like the obscure ones...What do you think, cousin?"

628 didn't answer immediately. He squinted at the name. He didn't know what he was supposed to feel, but he knew there should be something. It was there, but it was fuzzy, like a scrambled signal.

"You don't like it?" Lilo asked.

"I like it," 628 said. "It just...Doesn't feel like me."

"Try again?" Stitch suggested.

"...No. It's not the name that needs changing."

628 thought for a while. He found the music again.

_"I'm starting with the man in the mirror,_

_"I'm asking him to change his ways."_

"I think, first," he said, "I need to figure out what Leroy looks like."

"Great idea," Stitch said.

"You need any help?" Lilo asked.

"I don't think so," 628 said. "And anyway, you've already done so much for me...You go ahead and meet with the others. I'll see you soon."

"Sure. Your new look can be a surprise for everyone."

"Yeah."

He found Lilo and Stitch's arms wrapped around him. He could tell that they were having trouble getting a decent hug around an inky mass. Even so, their embrace was warm. He was even sad to be released.

"Pick anything you want," Lilo said. "Have fun with it."

"I'll try."

With that, they left him to his task. They turned around once to call out, "aloha, cousin Leroy!"

No, it still wasn't sticking. Not just yet.

628 went back to the mirror but caught a glimpse of Lilo's desk on the way. There was a thick, sky blue album on it, entitled _Cousins _in red crayon. He took it to the mirror, flipping through it while looking between his cousins' beaming faces and his own empty visage.

They were all in his head, but as he had gruelingly discovered, what he had in there was incomplete. He had numbers matched to powers and blueprints. It was all useless to him now. The album, however, filled in the blanks. Somewhere, hidden between the pages upon pages of photographs, was Leroy. It was only a matter of luring him out.

_"I've been a victim of,_

_"A selfish kind of love,_

_"It's time that I realize..."_

The first thing 628 noticed was a recurring shape shared by the likes of Stitch, Angel, Flute, Chopsuey, and Sparky. He looked to his reflection, nudging it into a gray version of that same shape. A round nose on an ovular head, complete with two longs ears; this would be his base.

_"That there are some with no home, not a nickel to loan,_

_"Could it be really me, pretending that they're not alone?"_

Next was the color. He was spoiled for choice. He considered a cool blue like Belle or a deep purple like Kixx or Thresher. However, he felt a certain allure about Daniel's blazing red. His gray fur caught fire, lighting up his new body.

_Almost got you, _he thought.

_"A willow deeply scarred,_

_"Somebody's broken heart,_

_"And a washed-out dream..."_

He shut his eyes, pouring over all the others he'd seen before. He could have black, blue, yellow, green, or perhaps even something else altogether. Maybe even every color at once.

No, that would look silly. And creepy.

He remembered the music store and the lazy river. He remembered Flute.

He opened his eyes, discovering that Leroy's were a glowing purple.

Of course they were.

_"They follow the pattern of the wind, you see,_

_"'Cause they've got no place to be,_

_"That's why I'm starting with me!"_

Only a few things were missing. Just one or two small yet essential details that would make the Experiment in front of him undeniably Leroy.

He traced the length of his new ears, leaving behind rippling notches along their edges like the undulations of a wave. He thought Leroy would enjoy the water.

He elongated a tuft of fur on his scalp, stretching it until it formed an arrow shape just between his eyes. He blew up at it, and it waved in the air before settling back down. He wondered if Angel would like it.

_"I'm starting with the man in the mirror,_

_"I'm asking him to change his ways!"_

Had he done it? Had he found him?

He went to the workbench, getting his glass of lemonade and bringing it back to the mirror.

Almost...

He smiled.

There he was.

_"And no message could've been any clearer!"_

"Aloha, cousin Leroy," Leroy said, taking a sip.

_"If you wanna make the world a better place,_

_"Take a look at yourself and then make a change!"_

The lemonade was delicious.

**II**

As Leroy left the garage, enjoying the air in his new fur and the dirt under his new feet, he wanted to head straight away to the backyard. He wanted to show everyone the new him as soon as possible.

As much as he wanted that, he couldn't stop thinking about Jumba and the myriad of inventions he'd taken away. He was also intrigued by the putrid, corrosive odor in the distance.

He followed the dirt path from the Pelekais' house, through a maze of palm trees, and into a clearing in the forest. He found Jumba, already having traded his lab coat for an orange Hawaiian shirt that seemed to be struggling to contain him. He faced a wide, sickly green puddle that frothed and seethed as it consumed several metallic remains. Their jagged, bent edges seemed to be reaching out to Jumba, begging to be saved. Jumba paid them no mind.

"Aloha?" Leroy said.

Jumba darted around. His four eyes were dark with befuddlement for barely a second, and then they lit up with recognition.

"Aloha, little one," he said, surprising Leroy with his soft tone. "And what will we be calling you from now on?"

"Leroy."

"Leroy," Jumba repeated. "Are you liking new name?"

"I love it."

"I am glad. It is being perfect for you."

Leroy stood beside him, watching as the machines slipped further and further into the plasma puddle.

"Some of them were great successes," Jumba said. "Water bottle that makes drinker thirstier. Compressible tank that fits in pocket and then expands on ground. I was thinking every grand idea from my evil genius brain was brilliant. Now, these inventions are only pieces of silly old scientist who could not see family in front of his stupid, four-eyed face."

"Well," Leroy said, "you could've dismantled them, then sold the pieces or used them in new inventions."

Jumba shook his head. "I am remembering every microscopic detail of all of my creations. Any money or new inventions would only bring back same memories."

Leroy focused on a bubbly patch chowing down on the melting barrel of some sort of cannon.

"Is that what we do now? Try to forget?"

Jumba was quiet for a while. A bird calling in the distance nearly drowned out the bubbling of the plasma.

"No," he soon said. "We change. I have kept only the things which will be of help to you and your cousins. Lilo has done so much work that I should have been doing from very beginning. You are not needing creator to tell you what you can or cannot be. You are needing father to help you become what you wish to be."

He looked down at Leroy. "Look at you now. I design you to be all Experiments rolled into one, and yet, here you are, in design of your very own."

Leroy gazed down at his new body. He still felt a welcoming snugness about it, not as if it were brand new, but as if it were something old that he'd rediscovered after many, many years.

"Hamsterviel told me..." He said, "that you had my pod locked in a safe."

Jumba nodded. His eyes glistened as the plasma did. "Being evil genius...It is fun in moment but hurts in later days. Making Experiment 628 was exciting, but then frightening as I wonder what terrible new evil I had created. Seemed better to not be knowing."

"So..." Leroy said. "Did you wish you hadn't created me?"

He blinked and found Jumba kneeling to his level, embracing him in his massive arms.

"All of you..." Jumba said, "are my ohana. I would never, in a thousand years, wish any of you away. My worst failures are the many, many things I have done that would make you think otherwise."

Leroy viewed the world through a film of tears. There was so much he wanted to say, but he couldn't find the words. Instead, he simply held Jumba. Somehow, he felt that Jumba already knew everything he would've told him.

There was a loud, acidic hiss. Leroy looked over Jumba's shoulder to find the plasma having the ground for dessert.

"Um, Jumba...?"

"Yes, yes, not to be worrying." Jumba straightened up, taking a pellet from his breast pocket and casting it into the puddle. A sheet of white spread over it, and then it crumbled to dust on the dirt.

"See?" Jumba said. "Only things that will help now."

Leroy watched the white dust as it settled into the ground, standing out against it while also blending in. A breeze came, scattering the dust over the forest floor. It joined with rocks, bushes, and trees, standing out but seeming like natural parts of them.

"Yeah," Leroy said. "I hope so..."

**III**

It was almost dark by the time Leroy made his way to Lilo's backyard. The place glowed orange with torchlight. His cousins were scattered about, many of them in camping chairs or lying on blankets.

Pleakley moved between them, handing out glasses of lemonade from a tray perfectly balanced on his fingertips.

Lilo, Victoria, Snooty, Stitch, and Angel shared a blanket, enjoying Plasmoid and Reuben's duet, backed by Angel's guitar.

_"I hold you in my arms,_

_"As the band plays,_

_"What are those words whispered, baby,_

_"Just as you turn away?"_

It was a soothing sight. At least, it was until Leroy spotted a few certain cousins.

Houdini, armed with a deck of cards, delivered an impromptu magic show for Heat and Kixx. She wiped her eyes with her cape as they applauded.

Spooky and Sparky, the latter reclining on a portable generator, were engaged in a game of Trivial Pursuit with Chopsuey and Daniel. Sparky's grayish-gold fur sizzled with electricity.

Felix and Elastico held each other close as they curled up on their blanket. They were smiling, but their faces seemed fragile, as if they might shatter if they released one another.

Drowsy's head rested on Remmy's shoulder. He listened intently with wide eyes as Remmy read from a book of poetry.

Slushy sank deeper into a cooler filled to the brim with ice cubes as if it were a hot tub. There were still traces of red about him. He lit up when Dupe came by to offer him a bowl of chocolate ice cream decorated with whipped cream and syrup.

_"I saw you last night,_

_"Out on the edge of town,_

_"I want to read your mind,_

_"To know just what I've got in this new thing I've found..."_

Looking at them, Leroy felt as if there was already enough of him there. Even if it was Leroy sitting down to join them, would they only see Experiment 628 infiltrating yet another of their peaceful gatherings?

_"So tell me what I see,_

_"When I look in your eyes,_

_"Is that you, baby,_

_"Or just a brilliant disguise?"_

"Hey, you finally made it."

Leroy spun around. Flute had appeared beside him.

"Uh, yeah," he said. "...Didn't think I'd beat you here."

"I just wanted to go inside to clean my flute quickly," she said, holding up her namesake instrument. "It was getting a little spitty."

"Right..."

"You look great. I like the ears."

"Oh. Thanks. Nearly everyone else had straight ones, so I thought mine might look good bumpy."

"It suits you." Flute made to join her cousins but stopped after a few steps when she found Leroy staying still.

"You coming?"

Leroy didn't answer. He folded his arms and looked down at his feet, pinching blades of grass between his toes. It was still strange to think that he had his own toes now.

Flute's hand sank into his vision. He looked up at her; she was smiling a sad sort of smile. It sent Leroy back in time to the street outside the music shop. He remembered her roaring at him, spraying spit onto his inky face. He remembered her stopping for a moment and then speaking to him as if he were an old friend. And he remembered how frightened he had felt.

He took her hand.

He blinked, and then was sitting beside Flute on a blanket at the edge of the gathering. Somehow, he felt as if he had been there forever.

"Alright, folks," Reuben said as he and Plasmoid closed out their duet. "I'm sure ya could all listen to Plaz and me all night, but I think we need a break. Anyone else wanna show us their pipes?"

He scanned around, his eyes lighting up when he spotted Leroy.

"Howsabout our new cuz?"

"Me?" Leroy said. He was met with a symphony of agreement.

"You know any songs?" Flute asked.

"Well...I think I remember one I listened to in the garage earlier."

"How'd it go?"

Leroy racked his brain for the lyrics. Once he found them, they climbed towards his lips and tried to escape. Meanwhile, his eyes darted between Slushy, Houdini, Drowsy, Spooky, Sparky, and Felix. They may as well have been his only audience. He remembered their eyes freezing behind glass and was sure they'd be the same here. Instead, he found that they were thawing. When he saw it, the words broke out.

_"Day after day, I'm more confused..."_

Angel and Flute instantly backed him with a riff. It was identical to what he had heard hours ago; they might have plucked the sheet music from his brain. He stopped for a second, surprised by how quick they were, and then carried on.

_"Yet I look for the light through the pouring rain,_

_"You know that's a game that I hate to lose,_

_"And I'm feelin' the strain,_

_"Ain't it a shame..."_

Stitch started clapping along with him. He was joined by Lilo, then Victoria, then Chopsuey, then Daniel...

_"Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul,_

_"I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away..."_

Reuben and Plasmoid, despite apparently needing a break, chimed in with him.

_"Give me the beat, boys, and free my soul,_

_"I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away..."_

They were then joined by Houdini, Heat, and Kixx.

_"And when my mind is free,_

_"You know a melody can move me..."_

Then Sparky and Spooky.

_"And when I'm feelin' blue,_

_"The guitar's comin' through to soothe me..."_

Felix and Elastico.

_"Thanks for the joy that you've given me..."_

Slushy and Dupe.

_"I want you to know I believe in your song..."_

Drowsy and Remmy.

_"Rhythm and rhyme and harmony..."_

And then they returned it to Leroy.

_"You help me along, making me strong..."_

And then everyone joined him, their voices echoing into the stars.

_"Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul,_

_"I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away,_

_"Give me the beat, boys, and free my soul,_

_"I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away..."_

They carried on for what felt like ages, but Leroy didn't want it to end. He felt warm. He felt light. He felt like Leroy.

And yet, he couldn't wait for it to end. He wanted to discover what he could do to keep feeling like Leroy tomorrow. And the day after. And the day after that.

But he knew it would all come. Until then, he could just drift away.


End file.
